PSVITA:
NICE 1, I dedicate dis FTC to ASSU and FG. Plz and plz , let dy strike end 2day. If you belief me like the comment.

Ndo o.

When you're holding the fart so hard cos your crush is around.

Affection, tolerance and Understanding.
#veryimportant.

Who told you?

Ka m nukwa..

....with my Camon c8 *Hot gist*

Jungle Justice... He is wrong though

Buhari ma BOO

LasoulMacuby:
Ashawo can u shut up for once. Mumu agbaya. We know ur story

Puliz...tell d world...my ears are itching..

Nunsence PORISE man.
Lest in Piss..

1) Most compounds are
noiseless because 'I better
pass my neighbour'
generators are on
sabbatical leave.
2) Wives are happy because
husbands
who like
hanging out are now staying
at home
with the family because
drinks outside
are not cold and no fuel to
drive out.
3) All the housewives are
cooking good
food because no more GT,Mr
Biggs,
Matice-----. Chai!
4) Kids are reading their
books since
watching
TV needs fuel.
5) No more congestion in
network since
many
peoples phones are off.
6) Browsing & downloading
is fast...noone
wants
browsing to kill his or her
battery.
7) Everyone sleeps very
early now.
There are MORE PRAYERS
& less
distractions
lolzz.
9) U even know its
true...that u wia reading
dis
so fast
so u cud log out b4 ur
battery goes off.

O for Okay

Hmmm...
D sweet taste of KARMA .

daniel9202:
pipl dey lie. op where is de piiisure or source or i ont belivit!!

Den don't!

A funny thing happened today at Muna obiekwe's
burial. as we were busy with snapping thing; some
were snapping the corpse while some were
snapping with NOLLYWOOD screen gods and
goddess who stormed UMUDIOKA town today, and
AGN task force were busy controling and pushing
crowd. one good-looking lady, an actress wanna-
be, in the process of snapping the corpse, her
IPAD slipped off her hand and fell inside the
grave.wow!. there was commotion. the method
they used is ropeslide to sent the corpse down. They were like "what are we gonna do?. the lady was
already screaming, my phone!,my phone!,MY
IPAD!, and no one was ready to go down there to
retrieve the phone, because before you can do that,
you must bring out the corpse. finally they
concluded to bury it with the corpse.

Wah is dah man duin wid a stick
E wan turn fishers-of-corpse

See Boobi

This is based on my
experience & other
information I gathered from some students in my school & around me, & I’ll be sharing it to ya’ll. Enjoy as you read & please whatever needs fixing should be fixed.
1: Failure 2 set their
priorities right: Most students find themselves in d university or college & tend to think live is just a straight road without setting goals/something to achieve, they just go to class just because when you are in school you must go to class, some don’t even go at all. Setting your priorities right means planning ahead of time, know
what you are in for & how
soon you can achieve your
goals.
2: The type of company they
keep: higher institution I a
place where you will surely
get to meet people of
different background, ethnic
group and belief, and it takes
a bad type to know who is
bad to keep up with. Being a
fresher is not a crime, but
most fresher won’t stop
forming “NA WE DEY HERE”,
yeah cos they wanna be heard
about, and they tend to walk
with people who can only get
out of their lives without
adding a pinch.
3: Over engagement: Hmmm,
at this junction I have to
clarify the difference between
school and a worship place or
a business arena, yeah we
understand that fingers are
not equal, reason why some
student fend form them while
all you do is just to put a call
through to your dad or mum,
but I’ve come to realize that
studying and business might
go together but not as
expected, more so, some
students have turned their
worship place into a lecture
room, they call it serving God
brings perfection and success,
but I,ll remind you now in
case you forgot that your
primary mission in school is to
read well and graduate with
something worth it.
4: Failure to understand
yourself: well, you might ask
what that mean, am gonna tell
you, understanding yourself
means knowing what exactly
work for you, are you the type
who takes a coffee before you
can read, perhaps you can
hardly read with candle, do
you even read at night? , oh
oh oh so you’ve been working
against yourself just because
bro Jack goes to night classes
doesn’t mean he knows more
than you do, I tell you now
that I met lot of scholars in my
first year who can’t do
without clubbing every
weekend, yet they are doing
really well in their studies. So
sit yourself down and
understand your philosophy.
5: Social life: well, I can’t
blame it all on facebook, IG,
whatsapp even 2go, gosh this
social media apps are just not
gonna stop to make and mar
people’s dreams, technology
has so much grown in the last
few years, students now
connect with anybody
anywhere in the world “the
world is global” that you just
said abi? Yeah but I still don’t
get why you stick to your
phone chatting and reading
lots of gist while you should
be in class or even writing a
test, a Prof, sometime asked
why students now fail
woefully, a student whispered
to my ears and said “there
was no FB, IG and 2go in your
time” I couldn’t help but
laugh.
6: The extroverts: I don’t
know how to categorize this
well, but am gonna try to
make you understand, gaining
admission into higher
institution is enough to call an
achievement, but I tell you
that’s just the beginning of
your quest, in remember how
many people I called during
my first year just to tell them I
gained admission, even
people I don’t really talk to , I
later thought over it and
asked “why am I doing this”
try to ask yourself the same
question. Perhaps you are the
type who can’t just keep your
happiness to yourself, I dare
you to start doing that now,
who knows you might just
get lucky to change
7: Lack of parental advice or
care: This should be for the
parents, you have done well to
pay for her school fees but on
the part of caring oooooops
you have done woefully bad,
when last did you call her to
ask if everything was fine,
when last did you even visit
her in school, I tell you
students change in a blink of
an eye, don’t be afraid if she
returns home acting all weird,
yeah you caused it. Do you
even call her to encourage her
to press on and not to get
tired, oh “no one was there to
tell me all these” is what u
keep saying, stand up and fix
this aspect.
8: Misuse of freedom: Now
you are in school and no one
to say “hey Dave, wash those
plates” hmmmmm, well you
might be free indeed but how
do you manage your freedom,
playing video games when
you ought to be in class,
seeing a friend at 10pm or
even smoking and drinking, it
doesn’t help you a bit, try to
fix that
9: Lack of Self-confidence:
This is the major reason why
student fail a lot, even after
you’ve read every material
expected of you, you still feel
empty in the skull, it’s not
because you are dull but
because you have not built
your self-confidence, are you
the type that rehearse just a
single sentence just to
approach your lecturer to
clarify.

Recently my ex has been trying to maintain a cordial relationship but to me, the whole thing is kind of your-pet-dying-and-you-still-keeping-it kind of situation.
Please i need some opinions

Warriz lovely about dz pishure

1- The perpetual late comer: This one has
an obsession with being noticed. She
always 'majestically' dogwalks( not
catwalk) into the church right in the
middle of the service, swinging her small
but 'standard' bumbum, head held high,
and proceeds straight to the front row.
Her 'long walk to freedom' most times
succeeds in destabilizing the pious and
godly 'Brothers in the Lord', who now
have a hard time concentrating on 'Manna
from above'. She is usually young, pretty,
and very much a busybody. *marieolae*
2- The Extremely Gorgeous Chorister : This
one is dropdead pretty, has an angelic
voice, and is the church's golden girl. At
times, she also leads praise and worship
sessions. Her 'ministration' is most likely to
lead a man to hell than heaven. Watching
her 'dance to the Lord' is like watching
soft Indecency.. It can cause a guy an
embarrassing Attention right there in the
House of The Lord. She doesn't dress or
act slutty, but her dressing and carriage is
just modest enough to conceal the
essentials, and revealing enough to make
an excited dude drop his whole month's
salary into the offering Box. Too many
brethren are seeking her hand in
marriage, and she has her choice of pick
among the church's most eligible
bachelors. So she is a bit proud,
condescending, and mostly unavailable if a
guy tries to 'corner' her after church
service. *Jennimma*
3- The loud ones: These girls usually come
to church just to hoot, shout 'ride on
pastor!', speak in tongues, and roll on the
floor, during the pastor's Ministration. In
my view, these are the Pastor's
sycophants. They really make the Pastor
look anointed, with all their psychedelic
activity. They are the the ones who rush
out when the pastor says that all virgins
should come to the alter. They are also the
ones who always fall around, breaking
chairs, and alarming everyone , all in the
name of being 'under the yoke of the
anointing'. Stay away from these kind of
girls, before them comot your eye, or
cause u grave physical injury, while under
their 'annointing'. *onila*
4- The 'Mummy's Girl': This one is always
accompanied to church by her stern-faced
mum. She is usually not older than 16, but
looking very delectable and fresh. (You
know that 'innocent freshness' girls
usually have at one point in their teenage
years, before 'everything' starts going
south). A dude dare not come within
talking distance of this chick. Her mum is
far more interested in protecting her
daughter's presumed innocence, than
whatever it is the pastor is carrying on
about. These are the kind of girls a guy
can do nothing about, but admire from a
safe distance, unless you wish to extend
your investigation beyond God's House.
*mzpreshie*
5- The young, beautiful and newly married
girl: This one always has a permanent
smile plastered on her face. Why she no go
smile? She has broken the yoke of
spinsterhood in grand style, and most
unmarried sisters are envious of her
'progress'. Most of the time, she is married
to a much older rich dude who is a
member of the Pastor's inner caucus (the
Church Cabal). She usually wears expensive
wrappers, distracting headties (gele), and
hardly stays at one place all through, and
even after the service. No be her fault sha...
Why she no go show herself? Husband
don really scarce for town. *Kachisbarbie*
NOTE: This work is mine... Not copied and
pasted from anywhere ..... So please don't
ask me about the source... I AM THE SOURCE

Catalyst4real:
Copy and paste From Google. Mtcheew

As much as we can read a good friend like a
book,
sometimes things get pretty unpredictable when
love
enters the equation.
Have you ever felt like a friend who was just a
friend has
more than just friends on their mind?
As hard as it can be to decipher the subtle and
secret
kind of love that exists when infatuation enters
the
picture, there are always a few clear and
obvious signs
that friends give away when they’re crushing on
you.
And all you have to do is just watch the way
they behave
around you, to notice these obvious signs!
20 clear signs your friend is crushing on you
Has your friend suddenly started to act weird
around you,
are they texting you more or even avoiding you
in public?
Have they suddenly started to care more about
their
appearance or who you’re romantically involved
with?
If the answer is yes to any of the above, then
there is a
good chance that your friend is crushing on
you.
But if you want to know for certain if your friend
is
crushing on you or not, then have a look at
these telltale
signs and find out for yourself!
#1 They need to get a booster on their phone
contract. A big sign that your friend is crushing
on you is
a sudden influx of texts from them. Have they
started to
text you multiple times throughout the day, for
no real
reason other than just to catch up?
Do you often wake up to a text from them, or
do they text
you to say goodnight? Do you often get texts
from them
when they are on a night out with their own
friends? If
your friend can’t stop thinking about you or
tries to get in
touch with you even when they’re busy having
fun, it’s a
very good sign that you’re running circles on
their mind!
#2 They seem to have discovered what styling
products are for. One of the easiest ways to tell
if your
friend is crushing on you is if they have
suddenly started
to make a big effort with their appearance,
especially if
they only make that effort when they know you
will be
there.
Take a look at their Facebook page and find
pictures
taken when you were not around, have they
made the
same effort? If the answer is no, then that could
be a
pretty big clue to whether they are trying to
impress you
or not.
#3 They always have their eyes on you. Have
you
noticed your friend staring at you often? If you
have, then
this is a clear indication of a crush, unless you
have food
around your mouth, that is.
You might find as well that whenever you look
at them,
they drop their gaze on you and look elsewhere.
This
embarrassing look-away shows they have an
interest in
you in more than just a friendly way.
#4 They could stop traffic with their face. Have
you
noticed your friend blushing when you talk to
them? Do
they often go red faced whenever they spend
time with
you or you are talked about? If they do, then
they
obviously have a crush on you, why else would
they be
getting so bashful?
#5 They have suddenly become a world class
comedian. Has your friend started to tease you
a lot? Do
they often make fun of you and point out silly
mistakes
that you have made, while at the same time,
never
hurting your feelings? This is the most common
sign of
attraction.
#6 They avoid you in public. Has your friend
suddenly
started to keep their distance from you, when
you are out
with friends? And when you are alone with
them, do they
behave in an overfriendly manner again? This
could be a
sign that they don’t want their friends to be
aware of the
fact that they have a crush on you.
#7 They treat your love life like a celebrity
magazine.
Has your friend unexpectedly started to take an
interest
in your love life? Do they want to know
everything that is
going on, like whom you like and who likes you?
Do they
ever show signs of being jealous when you talk
about
people you like? If they do, then you most
definitely have
a crush on your hands.
#8 They could win a game of don’t blink. Has
your
friend started to make more eye contact with
you than
usual? Do they listen intently to what you have
to say,
without dropping their gaze?
Do you find them trying to make eye contact
with you
when you’re across the room from each other?
If the
answer is yes, then the least this means is that
they
really like you.
#9 They have turned into your mirror. Have you
noticed your friend mirroring your body
language? A
common sign of attraction is imitation, and
people often
mirror those they are attracted to, without even
realizing
they are doing it.
So if your friend has started to mirror your
behaviour or
the words you use all of a sudden, then it could
be that
they are attracted to you.
#10 They like to introduce you to new things.
When
people have an attraction to another person,
they often
want to share details about their life with them.
They
want to share new things, in the hopes that the
one they
are attracted to, will pick them out above the
rest.
So if your friend has started sharing more about
their life
with you, then it could be an indicator that
*worst case
scenario* they want to be good friends or way
more!
#11 They like to surprise you. Does your friend
like to
surprise you with little treats or gifts? Do they
often stop
by your favorite pastry shop, to pick something
up for
you? Do they constantly recommend songs and
books
that you might like? Do they seem to go out of
their way
to please you? If they do, then you know there
must be a
reason behind it.
#12 They are available whenever you are. Does
your
friend show up to everything you invite them
to? And at
other times, has this friend always tried to
support you or
stand by you even when there’s no need for it?
If they
have a crush on you, then they will want to
spend as
much time as possible with you, so they will
always make
time to come to anything you have arranged.
#13 They speak highly about you to their
friends.
Have you ever met any of their friends? Do they
seem to
know a lot about you? Do they seem to like you
straight
away? If the answer is yes, then it could be
because your
friend has been talking about you, and this
friend
wouldn’t have been talking about you unless
you were on
their mind.
#14 They compliment you even in unflattering
moments. Does your friend compliment you
when you’re
in your sweat pants, looking all ruffled and
tired? Do they
try to make you feel better when you are feeling
low?
Have they ever told you that you look good,
especially
after a breakup or a fight with your own lover?
Do they seem to go out of their way to pick
something
nice to say to you? They wouldn’t be going
through all
that effort if they didn’t like you.
#15 They have gone all bashful. Has your friend
become shy around you? Do they seem to be
on edge
whenever you are left alone together? Have they
stopped laughing at jokes that at one point
would have
had them in creases?
If your friend has become abruptly shy around
you, or
overly chivalrous and dignified, then there will
be a
reason, the most probable one being that they
have
crush on you.
#16 They feel your pain. Does your friend get
angry or
upset when something affects you negatively?
Do they
often want to hurt those who have hurt you?
Do you find
that, at times, your friend cares more about the
messy
situation you’re in, than you do? If the answer
is yes,
then they clearly care a lot about you, and that
could be
because of the crush they have on you.
#17 They go out of their way for you. Does your
friend
ever go above and beyond for you? Have they
ever done
things for you that clearly don’t fit within the
expectations
of a just-a-friend description? Do they often
take it upon
themselves to help you, even if it means that
they are
putting themselves out of their way for you? If
the answer
is yes, then they clearly have a crush on you.
#18 They are polite and considerate. Has your
friend
suddenly become really polite and considerate?
If the
answer is yes, then they might be trying to
impress you.
They wouldn’t be doing that unless they like
you more
than they are letting on.
#19 They laugh at all your jokes. Have you
suddenly
become the funniest person in the world to your
friend?
Do they laugh at jokes that even you know
suck? Your
friend may just be trying to hide the fact that
they have a
crush on you.
#20 A hug type of person. Has your friend
turned into a
hug monster? Have you noticed them touching
you more
than normal? Do they put themselves into close
proximity
to you, whenever they can? If they have a crush
on you,
but are too scared to tell you, then they might
try to reach
out for whatever closeness they can get from
you.
You might find that not all of these
unmistakable signs
are relevant to you. But even if you can pick out
four or
five of the signs in this list, there’s a good
chance that
your friend has a crush on you.

17. You look at their profile
constantly
16. When you're on phone
with them late at night and they hang up,
you still miss them even just two minutes
ago.
15. You read their text over
and over again.
14. You walk really slow when you are with
them.
13. You feel shy whenever they are around
11. When you think of them
your heart beats faster but slower at the
same time
10. You smile when you hear their voice.
9. When you look at them, you cant see the
other people
around you, you just see him/
her.
8. You start listening to slow
songs while thinking about
them.
7. They're all you think of.
6. You get high just from their
scent
5. You realize you're always
smiling when you're looking at
'em
4. You would do anything for
'em.
3. While reading this there was one person
on
your mind the
whole time..
2. You were so busy thinking about that
person you didn't
notice number 12 was missing.
1. You just scrolled up to check and are now
laughing
at
yourself,...
True Or False

Angry birds

When the little Mahmud Kosija was delivered by his mother, Hajia Abibat Kosija two months ago, he came to this world with mysteries which had been attracting several residents of Ondo Kingdom and its neighbouring communities to their family house at Igbomoba Street, beside a central mosque.
Mahmud, a son of an Islamic cleric was said to have been born with a strange ear-shape, with an Islamic inscription.

Interestingly, it is said that the new-born  baby was shouting “Allah” “Allah”’ immediately as he was delivered at the Mother and Child Hospital in Ondo Town.

As soon as mother had been discharged from the hospital, the house of the baby’s family has become something like mecca. A large crowd came to see the miraculous ear with Islamic inscription meaning, “Allahu” in Islamic parlance.

The boy’s father named him Alfa Ibrahim Kosija and described his birth as the handiwork of Allah.

He explained that the shape of the ear which appeared like an Islamic inscription of “Allah” in the holy Quran was an indication of the message of God that the end of the world was gradually coming close.
According to the Islamic cleric, apart from the shape of the ear, the birth of the baby was a sign that the world was gradually coming to an end. He stressed that apart from being born on Muslim holy day, Friday, the time the baby was born was also apt in Islam (12, noon).

He added that the baby’s cry of “Allah, Allah” after birth attracted the attention of people at the hospital to the labour room before the shape of the ear was later discovered by the nurses, after which the baby used his left hand side to cover the ear.

Corroborating Kosija’s comment, an Ondo town based Islamic cleric, Sheik Abdulakeem Abeeblah, attributed the shape of the ear which he said means Allah in Islamic parlance. He called on all Muslims to fear God and refrain from committing sins that could prevent them from entering the kingdom of God.

Meanwhile mother confesses that the boy’s behaviour is quite unusual of babies of his age.

Not only is he crying during specific period of the day especially during the early Morning Prayer, popularly called “Tajuud” in Islamic religion, the boy is often noticed covering the strange ear with his left hand, mother says.

Commenting on the development, an Ondo based Medical Doctor, Olu Ojo described the shape of the ear which has an Islamic inscription as unusual. He noted that it was formed as a result of deformity in the conprivate part process in the embryo.

Dr Olu Ojo, while ruling out any other meaning in the shape of the ear which he said appeared so strange,added that it could occur to non-Muslim or even Christian.

abeg what does "lobatan" mean? as in wah context can it be applied?

;Dbefore now, i thought OP meant OPERATOR...

dx one na correct raincoat