MizMyColi:


What I do na
I just wrote

I don't see any issue if they have d means

buygala:
TODAY IS POKE-NOSING DAY

DEM NO CALL ME FOR THIS MEETING, BUT NA ME FIRST SHOW

*waiting for the above mentioned peeps to come and give the op the desired otapiapia

Anyway, as per the op's predicament...

Losing the girl to a sickle cell crisis is a possibility, which though farfatched since she is already past 25, is ever present... So can you handle the possible health uncertainties which an SS spouse puts on you? .... Can you comfortably contemplate the possibility of you raising your kids alone, because their mama is dead?

But I suppose your unborn kids are safe health-wise. .. They can only be AS and nothing more or less. .. But You will have burdened them with the duty of having to look for an AA spouse when they wish to procreate in the future

My advice.... As an AA dude myself who comes from a totally AA family, I would rather not get an AS wifey who will corrupt my Family Bloodline... I would wish my kids to have the same ease of choice in selecting their spouses that I currently enjoy...

Call me evil and selfish... But life is already hard enough without deliberately courting totally avoidable health complications

Na wa oo...so Who go come marry the SS lady?? Besides AA is the best Genotype wey fit marry her...ma 1kobo

ochiosa:
It's risky but if you have the money you can take her for bone marrow operation .......... financial involvement is between 8-10 million.

yeah!!! i remember a church member did this yearsss ago. and they gave testimony in church. i was so young then i didnt understand the procedure. in my little mind i thought they drained all his blood and transfused new blood into him. That was the only way i could explain someone moving from SS to AA

NLSince:
Hey Guys,

I'm in a fix right now. I created this account to seek advice about my current situation. I have seen some very good and some not-so-good advice being dished out here. I really hope I get more of the former.

So there's this lady who I'm interested in dating. infact, I was about to ask her out yesterday when one thing led to another and she told me she was SS.

Here's a little background to this:
1. I consider myself a good guy. I'm not a player and I can't date you if I don't see us heading to the aisle. I have been in relationships before which have ended but I don't date with the intention of ending it.
2. Because of Number 1, I don't just ask out anyone. I start by being friends and then if I see a future, I'll then take it forward else we mutually friendzone ourselves. I'm different, Bite me.
3. This Lady ticks most of the boxes I think is important. And I actually believe(d) that this would be my Last Bus stop. However, I don't want to get a wife who'll leave me soon.
4. I'm AA

I'll be grateful if you guys help me with answers to this:
a) Should I go on with this? or should I free her? or go against everything I believe in and break off the relationship once her next crises comes. (OMG, that's brutal. I'm cringing just writing that)
b) I know if we have kids, they'll be AS. What chances of survival does she have? at least to get up until 70. She's 25 right now.

Searching for a wife is hard. I really don't want to lose a good one (If I don't have to) and start searching again.

cc: MizmyColi, Kachisbarbie, Xiadnat, PickaBeau1, MatthewBriggs

This is no fix...............I sent you a mail.......reply it let's chat off this zone.............

I am 30....I was born as one. I have two other siblings with same condition ages 38yrs and 40yrs.

my sibling who is 40 has 4 kids and have been married for 10yrs.

Back to me.......I had my last blood transfusion when i was 8yrs old. I had my last crisis when..............(still thinking...) sometim,e in the university cos i didn't take of me so well. I found out what works for me and what doesn't..............Ecah time i go for a check at the doctor's, he is always amazed.

I have a friend who has same health challenge........she's 31.
she is married and has 5 kids.

Infact the last ones are twins and she gave birth to all 5 naturally (no CS).

There can be bad cases but it all boils down to knowing what works for you.
where i work, when i switch off the AC, no one dares put it on, cos they understand..........In cold weather, i put on extra clothes (stockings if needed).....................

I will stop here till i receive your mail...........But keep praying......everyone of us have some kind of defect/deficiency...........noticeable or not.

Don't even try it....I'm in that kind of challenge and as I'm right now I don have saving cos when she always had crisis and also my daughter too ...I spent close to 30,000 in every 2months...God is my trust and faith to get out of this challenge

Namzy:
People here can talk rubbish. See dude am a doctor and my sincere advice is no don't marry. She most likely wont live up to 40. I have never seen any ss at 40. Most even die while giving birth which is really a trying time and challenging if you want multiple kids. There are severe costly management to research on but even that is not guaranteed. Had a medical colleague who was ss and during our internship we dont let her stress herself, we did most of her calls and people were wondering why she had to read medicine and waste her years instead of a 4 year course. She died during nysc. May her soul RIP. Almost all ss crisis is an emergency and have seen many die from complications. You can even google their life expectancy which will of course be lower in Nigeria

you are an ignorant doctor, sorry to say, there are many SS people who have lived to 60,70 etc...is this what your medical schools in NIgeria teach you?,,Jesus! such ignorance. and u call yaself a doctor, na wa o....SS do survive..i have 3 in my family. ! they die when they dont manage it, an educated SS person will survive and live long against all odds, simple rules for SS are drink water a lot, few soft drinks, eat fruits , vegetables, dont play too hard, no mosquitoes, no extreme cold, keep the house ventilated, no alcohol no cigar .......
The sure P chairman is SS ,, Tosin Bucknor of Top radio is SS and she is very very healthy! This is enough proof of victory for SS! ignorance is truly a disease..sheesh! , OP marry her if u love her. Love her do not run away because of health divine health! A real man will love no matter the obstacles on the way including SS, what makes u think an AA cannot drop dead today ?? Love conquers all... Be strong, it is ur test of emotional strenght as a man! simple as ABC!

pls before you make up your mind, go to this site and read more about sickle cell disease.www.medicineNet.com type sickle cell disease. all is not lost with the disease.

Mikwus:

Its nice to see a survivor, keep fighting ma'am
It all boils down to knowing what triggers it and staying away from such things.
I really hope the OP contacts you as requested.
Once again, Nice!!

Vyolet:
If you do not love her enough to sacrifice for her then do not go into the marriage.

There are many good girls around who are healthy with less health and financial burdens. Take your time and choose one.
Try to avoid stories that touch in the long run.

In another dimension,you can go ahead with a block mind that whatever happens is what is meant to be. If she lives to be the mother of your kids,fine and if she doesn't,you will atleast be glad you married who please your heart and no regrets.



On a lighter note,Life itself is a risk,whether AA or SS,whoever will live long will live long. The very healthy man or woman might die as a result of one thing or the other.

You're on point guy. Same shoes do I find myself. Life itself is so full of risk. Be it to an AA patients or to an SS person as well. Therefore Gods know than we do.

richol:
QUESTION SCIENCE ASK GOD

lol,that's above my understanding,any genetic engr graduate around?

04kaa:


you are an ignorant doctor, sorry to say, there are many SS people who have lived to 60,70 etc...is this what your medical schools in NIgeria teach you?,,Jesus! such ignorance. and u call yaself a doctor, na wa o....SS do survive..i have 3 in my family. ! they die when they dont manage it, an educated SS person will survive and live long against all odds, simple rules for SS are drink water a lot, few soft drinks, eat fruits , vegetables, dont play too hard, no mosquitoes, no extreme cold, keep the house ventilated, no alcohol no cigar .......
The sure P chairman is SS ,, Tosin Bucknor of Top radio is SS and she is very very healthy! This is enough proof of victory for SS! ignorance is truly a disease..sheesh! , OP marry her if u love her. Love her do not run away because of health divine health! A real man will love no matter the obstacles on the way including SS, what makes u think an AA cannot drop dead today ?? Love conquers all... Be strong, it is ur test of emotional strenght as a man! simple as ABC!

Its no wonder their medical certificate isn't recognized abroad.
Just see what a doctor is saying?
I'm happy you educated him anyway.

a sibling if mine is SS and I categorically state that Its not as bad as people think. once you are there for her. our society finds it very easy to castigate people because of one particular ailment or condition. for e.g some people believe its not advisable to marry from a family because they hv a member that is a lunatic. this is absolute rubbish, we should help these people because what society does to them kills them more than the condition sef. There is nothing wrong with marrying an SS absolutely nothing, just make sure u don't over stress her, they tend to feel they are very strong. whenever shez lifting or needs to lift anything help her do, don't allow her go through stress, and make sure ur home is free of mosquitoes because malaria is the greatest cause of their crises and also she shouldn't take to much iron contained blood tonic, and if u want to treat her malaria never administer any anti malaria with artemisinine concentrate, just purely chloroquin is better. artemisinine is very harmful to them and gving birth don't have more than two kids cos many pregnancies might affect her. Oga enjoy your life with ur babe, I repeat they are not as bad as people think, and both of u should sensitize yourself about the condition. that's all. she might not even fall sick in one year if u take care of her very well. loool wont mind coming to ur wedding

Eluwilussit:


Did I say anything about death? It is not the Op's responsibility to make her a mom or fulfilled. I am not gonna knowingly enter into a situation that will put my future generations at risk, with my eyes wide open.

It is hard, but remember how Ebola victims are quarantined? There's natural quarantine. I have some cousins who chose not to get married, because of health issues that are no where as serious as that. We supported them. Abroad, people spare their future generations such problems by abstaining from marriage. It is common sense. Let's not get this twisted because of our sense of " goodness".

I agree with you, partially on the 'marriage is not by force' bit. And i misinterpreted your post, read another before yours and death being op's fear.

But then the op is AA, so they are not having SS kids. AS people don't have crisis. The only thing is that they are restricted when choosing their partners.

i Will never support AS and AS/SS. Although, my uni friend who's AS married her AS lover, and they decided not to have kids. They're adopting when they're ready and extremely happy.

Just have faith and pray for God's guidance and direction. Am a winner and I have seen so many cases of SS changed to AA miraculously.There is nothing God cannot do

Numerouuuno:

You probably haven't met some, our family doctor is above 50 and SS. what do you say to that?

Are u willing to take the risk? More so the doctor is a man hence no challenge of child bearing

If u really love her go ahead and marry her as far as she is 25 nothing will happened to her again

Hey guys what's the implication of an AA marrying an AS? My friend has this issue now, but he has not made a decision.

blessedfavoured:


I agree with you, partially on the 'marriage is not by force' bit. And i misinterpreted your post, read another before yours and death being op's fear.

But then the op is AA, so they are not having SS kids. AS people don't have crisis. The only thing is that they are restricted when choosing their partners.

i Will never support AS and AS/SS. Although, my uni friend who's AS married her AS lover, and they decided not to have kids. They're adopting when they're ready and extremely happy.

God bless your friend. That's a great move. I wish them all the best. I pray God to give them the grace to carry on.

Just have faith and pray for God's guidance and direction. Am a winner (a member of living faith church) and I have seen so many cases of SS changed to AA miraculously.There is nothing God cannot

buygala:
TODAY IS POKE-NOSING DAY

DEM NO CALL ME FOR THIS MEETING, BUT NA ME FIRST SHOW

*waiting for the above mentioned peeps to come and give the op the desired otapiapia

Anyway, as per the op's predicament...

Losing the girl to a sickle cell crisis is a possibility, which though farfatched since she is already past 25, is ever present... So can you handle the possible health uncertainties which an SS spouse puts on you? .... Can you comfortably contemplate the possibility of you raising your kids alone, because their mama is dead?

But I suppose your unborn kids are safe health-wise. .. They can only be AS and nothing more or less. .. But You will have burdened them with the duty of having to look for an AA spouse when they wish to procreate in the future

My advice.... As an AA dude myself who comes from a totally AA family, I would rather not get an AS wifey who will corrupt my Family Bloodline... I would wish my kids to have the same ease of choice in selecting their spouses that I currently enjoy...

Call me evil and selfish... But life is already hard enough without deliberately courting totally avoidable health complications

your words re kinda rude n harsh bro thou the guy is at risk if u go ahead the possibility of child bearing will be risky for the health state of the wife except ur faith can carry u enough u can go ahead bt medically it is risky

My brother the risk is 70/30 the chances are very slim. If you don't have faith or courage please i beg don't go into it. because when the real time arise you may end up asking urself why u entered into the relationship. Choose wisely

04kaa:


you are an ignorant doctor, sorry to say, there are many SS people who have lived to 60,70 etc...is this what your medical schools in NIgeria teach you?,,Jesus! such ignorance. and u call yaself a doctor, na wa o....SS do survive..i have 3 in my family. ! they die when they dont manage it, an educated SS person will survive and live long against all odds, simple rules for SS are drink water a lot, few soft drinks, eat fruits , vegetables, dont play too hard, no mosquitoes, no extreme cold, keep the house ventilated, no alcohol no cigar .......
The sure P chairman is SS ,, Tosin Bucknor of Top radio is SS and she is very very healthy! This is enough proof of victory for SS! ignorance is truly a disease..sheesh! , OP marry her if u love her. Love her do not run away because of health divine health! A real man will love no matter the obstacles on the way including SS, what makes u think an AA cannot drop dead today ?? Love conquers all... Be strong, it is ur test of emotional strenght as a man! simple as ABC!

Please that a few survived doesn't mean you'd take that risk afterall some couples with as can give birth to healthy as kids but that doesn't stop your learned pastor or relatives to try and avoid such unions. As for the dude talking about medical license abroad ish educate yourself with this from sickle cell disease association of America http://www.sicklecelldisease.org/index.cfm?page=faq

Namzy:

Are u willing to take the risk? More so the doctor is a man hence no challenge of child bearing

My sibling has a child aged 3 years as at now, living in an environment of -35 degrees temperature and she's VERY FINE.
Give me another excuse, I know it needs intensive care to maintain but Sickle cell is not a death sentence like you're advertising it, its just a health condition that can be maintained to even perfection.
You said you're a doctor but you only told the OP everything negative about what you think, there is nothing in your post on how it could be managed. A doctor should profess hope NOT doom.

NLSince:
Hey Guys,

I'm in a fix right now. I created this account to seek advice about my current situation. I have seen some very good and some not-so-good advice being dished out here. I really hope I get more of the former.

So there's this lady who I'm interested in dating. infact, I was about to ask her out yesterday when one thing led to another and she told me she was SS.

Here's a little background to this:
1. I consider myself a good guy. I'm not a player and I can't date you if I don't see us heading to the aisle. I have been in relationships before which have ended but I don't date with the intention of ending it.
2. Because of Number 1, I don't just ask out anyone. I start by being friends and then if I see a future, I'll then take it forward else we mutually friendzone ourselves. I'm different, Bite me.
3. This Lady ticks most of the boxes I think is important. And I actually believe(d) that this would be my Last Bus stop. However, I don't want to get a wife who'll leave me soon.
4. I'm AA

I'll be grateful if you guys help me with answers to this:
a) Should I go on with this? or should I free her? or go against everything I believe in and break off the relationship once her next crises comes. (OMG, that's brutal. I'm cringing just writing that)
b) I know if we have kids, they'll be AS. What chances of survival does she have? at least to get up until 70. She's 25 right now.

Searching for a wife is hard. I really don't want to lose a good one (If I don't have to) and start searching again.

cc: MizmyColi, Kachisbarbie, Xiadnat, PickaBeau1, MatthewBriggs

Op , you are in no fix as far as im concerned. Love conquers all. we will all die someday whether AA AS SS SC AB or what you have.
Being a SS carrier isnt an automatic death sentence it is an health condition that could be managed. presently, my closest friend is a sickler, lives in CAnada where the temperature goes beyond -40 at times. shes 35 years old.
guess what , her husband developed a cold feet when he was about to make same decision as you todaay, asking people for advice. but thank God he went ahead. he confesses shes the best thing that has ever happened to her. Truth be told, she might have some crises, but she will pull through and you must be ready to show love and be tolerant.
As long as ur wife to be adheres to her health rules she would be fine. These include: Reducing her stress level, taking lots of water, veggies, fruits. using her folic acid judiciously and avoids extreme heat or cold temperatures.
Lets not forget the place of God, hes the giver of life. Prayers are never too much.
"Scared of her not living up till 70?" forget it, what gives an AA the assurance he would live to see the next day?
God is the giver of life and he has promised us that he would satisfy us with long life, if you believe.
my friend has 2 kids, normal delivery, no CS, drives around, goes skating a financial analyst with a top bank,stronger than most AA or what you have. when she was in Nigeria her doctor aged 70 was an SS.
Let no sickness take away ur LOVE and JOY. no sentiments attached, prayerfully make your decision.
and by the way your kids can never be SS.

richol:
pray to GOD....cos ive seen cases that the aa marrying ss nd all the children are ss

. bro how's that possible

searching4love:


OP WHY DON'T YOU TRY DATING A FOREIGN LADY? THEY DON'T HAVE THIS SICKLE CELL PROBLEMS LIKE MANY NIGERIAN GIRLS


#team foreign girls

are u a broda 2 mr cork?

Numerouuuno:


My sibling has a child aged 3 years as at now, living in an environment of -35 degrees temperature and she's VERY FINE.
Give me another excuse, I know it needs intensive care to maintain but Sickle cell is not a death sentence like you're advertising it, its just a health condition that can be maintained to even perfection.
You said you're a doctor but you only told the OP everything negative about what you think, there is nothing in your post on how it could be managed. A doctor should profess hope NOT doom.

Sorry but like I said earlier what would you have told the op if the question was "my girl is AS same as me should I marry her?" its good you see the HOPE side but am a realist and i don't want to sound pessimistic but living your life based on hope is not living. Pls help me check highest number of kids from a sickler recorded

AA can marry any body, go ahead and settle down with the one u love. If you were AS n she to is same, I will tell you don't, talk more of AS to SS, aaaaah not march

Numerouuuno:

Once again, I am sorry about the situation.
Please tell your cousin to eat fruits, vegetables and drink nothing less than 6 sathcet of water daily in addition to the usual 3 square meal.
Also, tell him to have diclofenac 50mg at hand to be used with hot water ONLY when a crisis come up unexpectedly and take him to the hospital immediately.
Sickle cell takes lots of funds to take care and knowing the right things to use or do can be the little gap between life and death.
Long life to the remaining twin I pray.
PS: if you doubt the drug i talked about, please tell him to ask his doctor.

His elder bro is a medical doctor

ask4bk:


His elder bro is a medical doctor

Alright, that's even better.
Good luck.

Namzy:


Sorry but like I said earlier what would you have told the op if the question was "my girl is AS same as me should I marry her?" its good you see the HOPE side but am a realist and i don't want to sound pessimistic but living your life based on hope is not living. Pls help me check highest number of kids from a sickler recorded

MR DOCTOR,Ive seen a grandma of 75 that had 5 kids. Grandma is SS.
what sort of a doctor are you? realist my foot!!!
so sicklers are not entitled to live a good life?
whats ur challenge in this? if the ops question was as stated in ur post above,i wouldnt advise him to go ahead . cos definitely they would have ss as kids
but for goodness sake, hes AA and marrying an SS does not make them liable to aving SS kids.
wake up doc!!! you cant even create a human, so why condemmn one? God has only given u the technical/biological know how to manage their situations so please be judicious in doing dat. dont complicate matters by writting them off. if you dont live your life based on HOPE then what else.?
pray that God sustains you. reality without God takes you no where. with hope, God and taking good care of themselves SS would outlive normal so-called AAs.

Namzy:


Sorry but like I said earlier what would you have told the op if the question was "my girl is AS same as me should I marry her?" its good you see the HOPE side but am a realist and i don't want to sound pessimistic but living your life based on hope is not living. Pls help me check highest number of kids from a sickler recorded

1.I am also a realist, this a real life situation, its just common sense for two AS genotype carriers not to marry. That is a very silly situation to get into considering it is the poor kids that will live to suffer their mistake or sillyness.

2.But in this case, the OP's child won't be anything worse than AS. Its his proposed wife health condition that we can only proffer solutions to on how she can live a healthy life, of which it is a very possible thing to do or achieve.

3. who gives birth to four children or more in this present time of economic depression. With good health care, if the OP goes ahead to marry this Lady, she can give birth to 2-3 kids.
Remember, I said good health care , not the kind of health care you Nigerian doctors offer to helpless patients.
The OP can sponsor his wife to the USA or CANADA to give birth and his kid will be automatic citizens while the wife will live to tell her child bearing tale. Other medical conditions like monthly medical checkup could still be done in Nigerian hospitals.