njokusboy:


Lolzz, ofcourse, ur aim was to distract me... shey na me you wan carry do merry go round....
Pls, advice your comrades to stop bleaching, skin cancer dey.. They also need to leave us alone to make our choice...a word is enough for the dumb...

I am glad we have come to a consensus! Black women need to keep off! Nothing comes between a black man and his pe.nis.

Stillfire:
Black men love lighter skinned women and BLACK WOMEN NEED TO ACCEPT IT AND MOVE ON.
Why black women choose to reduce themselves to rabid dogs to challenge this issue is beyond me. Please have some class. Accept the FACT that black men prefer lighter skinned women and lighter skinned are placed on a pedestal for goodness sake, so that you can have peace of mind.

Stilly, I like your "outcome/action " statement. Spot on. But the tendency towards lighter skin is universal - it's not just a black thing. And "light" skin alone ain't a thing. It has to come wrapped - or should I say wrap up a whole load of other assets - 'oops I did it again !

Stillfire:
We all know where this preference came from. We are not stupid. The black man has been defeated by the White man, these are just examples of the spoils of war . The sooner you realize this my fellow AA sisters the better for you! You are only giving them ammo to ridicule you and call you names like the OP intends on doing when you give them the time of day.
Sir Victor Olaiya as far back as the 80s sang Omo pupa o le mi fe, jo wo mo fe bla bla (dunno the rest), but it means he prefers a light skinned woman. Bleaching cream definitely skyrocketed then in Nigeria.

But as ever your reasoning is somewhat faulty. Prbably driven by an ill-informed ideology/notion of consciousness. Light skin is universaly seen as a mark of beauty, rightly or wrongly. But it is not in itself determinant of mate selection or even preferred. Do you really think brothers are feeling for pancake nyash just because it's yellow .

Stillfire:
The aim of this thread is to ridicule black women. Black men get a dig out of it, if you do not know, know now. They cannot fight the main oppressors that is why they turn against their women. Do not give them ammo.
She is right on one thing though...Another fake conscious rapper exposed! Black women know thy enemy!

Black womens biggest enemy are black women and feminism - although not necessarily in that order .

We still love y'all.


TV

pickabeau1:
Just here to read comments..

...enter fray jor...it's fun


TV

TV01:

...enter fray jor...it's fun


TV

lol... there are issues

The black man nd woman need change.. that's the truth

Some men have abdicated their responsibility as authorities in the family which has led to the ascendance of 'strong black women' - filled with anger and hate

Some idolize the white woman look and make themselves bleached, burn their curly hair or use attachments all to hide their God given beauty

Some equate strength to being mouthed and rude all over the place

One can go on... The matter no go end today

i am starting to feel sorry for dark-skinned women. when a white man doesn't want them, they scream racism. what is the excuse now that the black men are starting to look across the racial line to procreate?

stillfire, i am selling bleaching cream. 60% discount for you.

njokusboy:


If you copy my hairstyle and bleach your skin lyk mine, it simply means you re not comfortable with the way you are and desire to be like me... even a fool can deduce that...

And besides, your topic doesnot correlate to the OP.

Shollypopzz:
My issue with Kendrick Lamar, which I earlier stated is that he has deliberately used the image of darker black women in his album artwork and videos, to make a political statement , whilst being with a woman who, clearly appears more racially ambiguous than the majority of black women, and certainly is not the kind of woman he raps on in ‘the blacker the berry’.

Simply disingeneous. That's not an issue with Lamar, that's an issue with the women who decided to ideologically co-opt his music to feel good about themselves instead of attending to the fixables.

Shollypopzz:
- Promoting black power and repeatedly using the images of black women with darker skin and fuller features to assert a point, whilst being with a woman whose image contradicts that, just seems calculating and disingenuous. If black was black, and color was irrelevant, Kendrick would have used more women in his videos who resemble his gf, but he wanted to prove a point to seem conscious to sell records i.e having darker women with ‘fros, whilst privately proving himself to be very much a part of a wider trend in black male dating preferences that speaks loudly to internalised feelings of inferiority, in spite of his ‘black is beautiful’ rhetoric.

Lamar - good for him - managed to separate race consciousness from marriage consciousness
I've heard his name but don't know him or his music, but his lifestyle choices do not necessarily have to be dictated to by his music or even the message it conveys if it is not morally prescriptive.

I train hard and could fairly be labelled a gym-rat. But I didn't feel compelled to marry a gym-bunny even though that was a consideration. Come and see downcast looks at the gym 0 !

Shollypopzz:
P.S: The chic isn't white. I wonder why the op and some posters keep saying white. She is not white, at least she doesn't claim to be. She is 3/4 black with European features.

Whatver she is, it's his choice. Every time a high-profile black male marries someone not approved by the sisters, they go into meltdown. Same thing for the guy from "Being Mary Jane". Get some self-respect. Make yourselves desirable and stop fixating/feeling entitled to black men by right - and the feeling you have a say in their mate choices.


TV

bukatyne:

Agreed


Not a problem however if he leaves Loya Milk on the shelf and picks Peak Milk, then there will be a problem


That is their struggle how tribe is ours and it is very real that's why Kendrick could cash in on it in the first place.

I do not pretend to understand it so I try to see it from their perspective and relate using brand ambassadorship here in Nigeria

It is big for them and we should respect that.

It's their struggle alright, but you can't equate it to tribalism in it's entirety.

The black woman has issues with the black man, the black woman also has issues with white women, the same black woman still ends up having issues with fellow black women that are of lighter shade... do you not see the problem?

coogar:
stillfire, i am selling bleaching cream. 60% discount for you.

...broda, you are among those decieving the sisters .

Please add dietary advice, exercise programs, anger management courses, fashion tips, hair insights and etiquette to your product offering.


TV

^{Skoda used ot be the laughing stock of the motoring world. But they turned it around with strategic thought and hard work. Sisters, over to you}

TV01:
I've heard his name but don't know him or his music, but his lifestyle choices do not necessarily have to be dictated to by his music or even the message it conveys if it is not morally prescriptive.

ever since suge knight ruined hip hop in the west coast by murdering 2pac, that seat of the king of CA has been vacant. kendrick lamar has been generally accepted as the heir to the throne.

he's signed under dre......very well respected and he comes across as a conscious rapper. however, his black consciousness does not mean he cannot date across the racial line. the black feminist bïtch who attacked him for his choice in women is just another rabid feminazi.

if AA women are suitable, men would marry them - their dark skin wouldn't be an obstacle if their general behaviour is something to write home about. however, with their dark minds & dark skin - it's a no brainer they are being avoided.

TV01:

...broda, you are among those decieving the sisters .
Please add dietary advice, exercise programs, anger management courses, fashion tips, hair insights and etiquette to your product offering.
TV
^{Skoda used ot be the laughing stock of the motoring world. But they turned it around with strategic thought and hard work. Sisters, over to you}

i don die o


rashida strober should channel her aggression towards fighting for black women to use the gym more. no sensible man would prefer an obese fart machine to svelte & sophisticated women. even the white dudes who marry black women mostly go for the fit & athletic types.

You are looking fairer' is a compliment (Until it gets to bleaching) while 'you are looking darker' is associated with suffering, illness or seen as a 'discompliment'.

bukatyne

crackhaus:

It's their struggle alright, but you can't equate it to tribalism in it's entirety.

The black woman has issues with the black man, the black woman also has issues with white women, the same black woman still ends up having issues with fellow black women that are of lighter shade... do you not see the problem?

Says who?

In the reality, what is the problem that we are of different tribes or skin tones? Does it matter?

The black woman has issues with the black man, the black woman also has issues with white women, the same black woman still ends up having issues with fellow black women that are of lighter shade... do you not see the problem?

I can equally say the black man has issues with the black woman entirely, with dark skinned black women and black women who marry from other races(Mostly on NL). (Look at one of shollypopz's posts)

Besides, this is the AA's struggle and not blacks' in its totality.

The black men and women have issues with each other (God knows who the blacks are sef) and should best solve it.

crackhaus:
The black woman has issues with the black man, the black woman also has issues with white women, the same black woman still ends up having issues with fellow black women that are of lighter shade... do you not see the problem?

Point. Until they come out from under the cloud of denial all they can do is rage!

Black women prefer black men and have little by way of choice with other men. Black men on the whole prefer black women, but have a wide array of choice from other races of women. It's a global market. What are you selling?

Mary J Blige used Terence Howard in her "...be without you video". She likes dark black men. Who even noticed? Choice is freedom


TV

cococandy:
bukatyne

I would really like us to differentiate between AA's struggles and Nigerian's struggles and not group all into 'black'.

Nigerians surely have their problems... (the Oba has threatened to throw Igbos in the Ocean ) however skin shade is not a problem even if though we esteem fair skinned over dark skinned.

I cannot relate with 90% of the AA's problems.

The vast majority of black men prefer black women? Well..... Maybe. But in the pool of black women,they prefer the lighter skins from what I have seen.
And it has really nothing much to do with behavior or attitudes like some would like to imply. They just plain ol' prefer creamy shades. That's why I understand where that lady is coming from.

People like njokuboy should leave her alone. You can't beat a child and ask it not to cry .
.

TV01:
...ah, Coco, my favourite...holá!


Some black men prefer white women - allow. The vast majority of black men prefer black women and marry black women.


Nope we are always sure to label hysterical entitlement princess for what they are. It's a tone neutral term !


Not true. A man that "serves" his wife in his capacity as husband does so because he knows too. Not because she has a certain skin tone or he feels blessed to have her because she has.


I kinda feel you here. Her pain is palpable - he rage however is misdirected. Google her. She needs to do some squats, fix her hair and install an attitude adjustment - she'll be pleasantly surprised at the results .


That would be a disservice - we should direct her a'right - as above - there is yet hope !


TV

This thing is not a matter of preference. It has become a norm. Let me use my parents as example. They've been married more than 30 years. While they were dating. My mum and dad went to visit a friend of of my mum who happens to be from the part of the country who have many light skinned women. When her friend saw my dad she said " your husband na dark man. Why u go marry person wey black like u. U are meant to marry a fair man or someone a bit light so your children can look a bit brighter and finer. She said where she is from, it is not said outrightly but it's a salient criteria. The lighter a child or a person is, the finer the person becomes.

My mum was shocked but didn't take it serious. This was as far back as the 60's. I have been told by guys to bleach a bit so I can have options. Funny enough all my friends are light skinned. I fought wiv one who told me to bleach so men can be calling me the way they call her. I felt bad that day but not as bad as the day I went for a job interview at an advertising company and was told that the role I was applying for they needed a fair skinned person just to attract people. I have had many other experiences. Hardly do u meet any man who his ideal girl isn't fair, slim etc. They all seem to have the same ideal woman. But I have learnt long time ago to accept what I cannot change. There are still men who look beyond skin colour. Sadly they are in the minority.

Funny thing is many biracial couples I know and the ones I have come across. They seem to always date or marry the dark skinned woman and not the fair ones. Strange!!!!!

bukatyne:


I would really like us to differentiate between AA's struggles and Nigerian's struggles and not group all into 'black'.

Nigerians surely have their problems... (the Oba has threatened to throw Igbos in the Ocean ) however skin shade is not a problem even if though we esteem fair skinned over dark skinned.

I cannot relate with 90% of the AA's problems.

@bold, If only.

Setaje:
This thing is not a matter of preference. It has become a norm. Let me use my parents as example. They've been married more than 30 years. While they were dating. My mum and dad went to visit a friend of of my mum who happens to be from the part of the country who have many light skinned women. When her friend saw my dad she said " your husband na dark man. Why u go marry person wey black like u. U are meant to marry a fair man or someone a bit light so your children can look a bit brighter and finer. She said where she is from, it is not said outrightly but it's a salient criteria. The lighter a child or a person is, the finer the person becomes.

My mum was shocked but didn't take it serious. This was as far back as the 60's. I have been told by guys to bleach a bit so I can have options. Funny enough all my friends are light skinned. I fought wiv one who told me to bleach so men can be calling me the way they call her. I felt bad that day but not as bad as the day I went for a job interview at an advertising company and was told that the role I was applying for they needed a fair skinned person just to attract people. I have had many other experiences. Hardly do u meet any man who his ideal girl isn't fair, slim etc. They all seem to have the same ideal woman. But I have learnt long time ago to accept what I cannot change. There are still men who look beyond skin colour. Sadly they are in the minority.

Funny thing is many biracial couples I know and the ones I have come across. They seem to always date or marry the dark skinned woman and not the fair ones. Strange!!!!!

I've even heard that severally. 'Ah at least you're light skin, your children have hope ' seriously? Hope for what? For light skin?
You will see some folks joke about how this newly wedded couple are both so dark,their kids will be like charcoal. And to us that's bad
They really don't mean any harm when they say it but it feeds a subconscious insecurity among dark women.

It is really unfair to dark and black people as a whole because even a negro albino is a black person and such things collectively insult all of us.

bukatyne:


Says who?

In the reality, what is the problem that we are of different tribes or skin tones? Does it matter?

Tribalism goes much deeper, but skin-tone just like beauty is only skin-deep.
Now while the former is innately cultural, the latter is pure vanity.

That's the difference.

I can equally say the black man has issues with the black woman entirely, with dark skinned black women and black women who marry from other races(Mostly on NL). (Look at one of shollypopz's posts)

Besides, this is the AA's struggle and not blacks' in its totality.

The black men and women have issues with each other (God knows who the blacks are sef) and should best solve it.

It might as well be our (Africans) struggle, haven't you all be saying that we (Nigerians) also prefer light skin women over darker shade?
So it's something we can relate to.

And err, black men don't hate on black women who marry other races...neither do black men hate on other black men of lighter shade.

cococandy:
The vast majority of black men prefer black women? .

Statistical fact - even in the good ole' US of A. When I moved back to the UK it took a while for me to "feel" white girls. I actually thought it would be mixed race women all the way. Long-term my preference was for really dark and creamy and I married someone pretty much average black?

cococandy:
Well..... Maybe. But in the pool of black women,they prefer the lighter skins from what I have seen..

I tend to agree with you here, but I don't think it's a default setting. Lots of men love darker and many have no real preference. I was pleasantly surprised when I had my first fair g/f and used to regularly srprise myself by "wowing" at lighter black women when I thought I prefered really dark ones? Plus most men are driven more by other physical attributes over and above skin tone.

cococandy:
And it has really nothing much to do with behavior or attitudes like some would like to imply. They just plain ol' prefer creamy shades. That's why I understand where that lady is coming from. .

To a degree maybe - but it's not a real excuse. But what of short men? Or poor blokes? Or, or, or...we all have to work to rise above our percieved disadvantages and make the best of our situations.

cococandy:
People like njokuboy should leave her alone. You can't beat a child and ask it not to cry .

Shes crying "not fair" because she can't be bothered to work for it, not because she is being cheated or discriminated out of it - she deserves to be paddled !


TV

Setaje:
This thing is not a matter of preference. It has become a norm. Let me use my parents as example. They've been married more than 30 years. While they were dating. My mum and dad went to visit a friend of of my mum who happens to be from the part of the country who have many light skinned women. When her friend saw my dad she said " your husband na dark man. Why u go marry person wey black like u. U are meant to marry a fair man or someone a bit light so your children can look a bit brighter and finer. She said where she is from, it is not said outrightly but it's a salient criteria. The lighter a child or a person is, the finer the person becomes.

My mum was shocked but didn't take it serious. This was as far back as the 60's. I have been told by guys to bleach a bit so I can have options. Funny enough all my friends are light skinned. I fought wiv one who told me to bleach so men can be calling me the way they call her. I felt bad that day but not as bad as the day I went for a job interview at an advertising company and was told that the role I was applying for they needed a fair skinned person just to attract people. I have had many other experiences. Hardly do u meet any man who his ideal girl isn't fair, slim etc. They all seem to have the same ideal woman. But I have learnt long time ago to accept what I cannot change. There are still men who look beyond skin colour. Sadly they are in the minority.

Funny thing is many biracial couples I know and the ones I have come across. They seem to always date or marry the dark skinned woman and not the fair ones. Strange!!!!!

I agree with you still it is not seen as a problem here really

The blackies (guys and ladies) either bleach or stay as they are...

I do not see dark skinned people organizing a rally to fight light skin preference in Nigeria today

Maybe in 100yrs time

TV01:

Point. Until they come out from under the cloud of denial all they can do is rage!

Black women prefer black men and have little by way of choice with other men. Black men on the whole prefer black women, but have a wide array of choice from other races of women. It's a global market. What are you selling?

Mary J Blige used Terence Howard in her "...be without you video". She likes dark black men. Who even noticed? Choice is freedom


TV

Who even cares what colour of man MJB or Beyonce uses in their videos, Lol...

It's only women like that activist with loads of misdirected anger that feel bad seeing anyone of lighter skin-tone as a threat to their confidence - it's totally unnecessary.

Bukatyne, you're saying Kendrick hasn't stayed true to his brand and I ask, how so? Just because Kendrick favours dark balck doesn't mean he can't get it on with light black. There's nothing to talk about there, really.

crackhaus:

Who even cares what colour of man MJB or Beyonce uses in their videos, Lol...

It's only women like that activist with loads of misdirected anger that feel bad seeing anyone of lighter skin-tone as a threat to their confidence - it's totally unnecessary.

AA women care o.
the light skinned women have taken their jobs as video honeys. this trend is also spreading to africa. all our music stars now fly to south africa to shoot their music videos to showcase the mixed race women or the light skinned black women.

bukatyne:


I agree with you still it is not seen as a problem here really

The blackies (guys and ladies) either bleach or stay as they are...

I do not see dark skinned people organizing a rally to fight light skin preference in Nigeria today

Maybe in 100yrs time

Hahahhahahaha I can imagine that. Wiv me at the forefront wiv a placard written Death to fair skinned african women. Kill them all. Lmaoooooo.

It is only on nairaland I read all these silly stuffs.
In real life,black men marry black women,people get married every weekend,bros isaac sees sis joke and considers her beautiful,he even tags her the most beautiful woman on earth and they live happily.

Now I come online to read a different thing while in real life,women of all colours get married every weekend.

By the way, men favour a certain complexion in women, it's lighter than black and darker than white. Mulatto, people, which doesn't mean women should go on a bleaching spree. Do the best with the complexion you have and stop beefing the more fortunate.

coogar:


AA women care o.
the light skinned women have taken their jobs as video honeys. this trend is also spreading to africa. all our music stars now fly to south africa to shoot their music videos to showcase the mixed race women or the light skinned black women.

I'm a dark skin lover bros. I'd take the Wande Coal "The Kick" video chick over any number of light skinned honeys.

TV01:

Statistical fact - even in the good ole' US of A. When I moved back to the UK it took a while for me to "feel" white girls. I actually thought it would be mixed race women all the way. Long-term my preference was for really dark and creamy and I married someone pretty much average black?


I tend to agree with you here, but I don't think it's a default setting. Lots of men love darker and many have no real preference. I was pleasantly surprised when I had my first fair g/f and used to regularly srprise myself by "wowing" at lighter black women when I thought I prefered really dark ones? Plus most men are driven more by other physical attributes over and above skin tone.


To a degree maybe - but it's not a real excuse. But what of short men? Or poor blokes? Or, or, or...we all have to work to rise above our percieved disadvantages and make the best of our situations.


Shes crying "not fair" because she can't be bothered to work for it, not because she is being cheated or discriminated out of it - she deserves to be paddled !


TV

@bold it is the same thing. Especially for short men. That's why I don't say anything when I hear them complain.
They didn't create themselves, and you can't really force anyone to like a short man if she doesn't but it is unfair to try and shut a short man up for ranting against the 'injustice'

I agree we should all work to improve ourselves no matter what the physical shortcoming may be

cococandy:
I've even heard that severally. 'Ah at least you're light skin, your children have hope ' seriously? Hope for what? For light skin?
You will see some folks joke about how this newly wedded couple are both so dark,their kids will be like charcoal. And to us that's bad
They really don't mean any harm when they say it but it feeds a subconscious insecurity among dark women.

It is really unfair to dark and black people as a whole because even a negro albino is a black person and such things collectively insult all of us.

I've gone to such weddings a lot. Wiv the mc telling the dark dude he did the right thing marrying a light skinned woman cus of their children. A friend of mine blotted one statement when we were arguing on this same issue. She said she prays her daughters will not take her husband's dark colour. They should be fair so they can sell market. . Sell which market. I have known this girl for a long time suddenly it seemed I did not no her again after that statement. I also no of a woman who was using bleaching cream on her dark daughter. To the extent that green veins started appearing on the side of her face. So when men act like skin colour doesn't matter. I just laugh. It doesn't matter yet in Bella naija. Out of 10 weddings in a month, just notice how majority of the girls are fair skinned wiv very dark and handsome guys or its a coincidence that almost every bank marketer is fair. Hhahahahhahahahahhahah. Lmao. It is well. Let me not generalise. Like I said there are still people and organisations who look beyond the skin complexion.

TV01:

Stilly, I like your "outcome/action " statement. Spot on. But the tendency towards lighter skin is universal - it's not just a black thing. And "light" skin alone ain't a thing. It has to come wrapped - or should I say wrap up a whole load of other assets - 'oops I did it again !


But as ever your reasoning is somewhat faulty. Prbably driven by an ill-informed ideology/notion of consciousness. Light skin is universaly seen as a mark of beauty, rightly or wrongly. But it is not in itself determinant of mate selection or even preferred. Do you really think brothers are feeling for pancake nyash just because it's yellow .


Black womens biggest enemy are black women and feminism - although not necessarily in that order .

We still love y'all.


TV

To be light is a compliment in our community and seen as a beauty yardstick in the universe and in the same breath you say it is not preferred? Hahaha. TV you can do better than this. I am here to tell black women the truth, so that peace can reign in their hearts.
My biggest enemy is the one who insults me o, if not for the law black men will kill black women. I no dey do any pseudo intellectualism. The person that insults me at every given breath is my enemy. And that is the black man.

Timbuktou:
I'm a dark skin lover bros. I'd take the Wande Coal "The Kick" video chick over any number of light skinned honeys.

there are more appealing things on a female body part than her skin. i don't care about skin colour as long as she's pretty. the face is my top priority.