TooNoisy:
What exactly is your point? So women should expect their husbands to cheat? What nonsense is this?

damiso:
The worst thing that can happen to a marriage depends on the two individuals in a marriage and what their ideals and values are. In other words like most family issues diff strokes for diff folks.

FrancisTony:
I can only speak for Christians.

Bible said love your wife as Christ loved his Church.
Any Christian man that supports OP will definitely not eat his cake and have it.
Adultery and Pre-marital sex is evil - shun it.

Don't be a cheat and expect submissive/respectful wife.


N/B - Quote responsibly...

damiso:
The worst thing that can happen to a marriage depends on the two individuals in a marriage and what their ideals and values are

e.g. A runs girl who dated 15 married men as a young lady was hardly ever in school and sha graduated with a pass and no employable skills whatsoever.She was eventually able to snag an 'island' big boy who married her. They live on Bannana Island she drives the best cars, always decked in Louboutins and Ferragamo (y'all know the pic i am painting ) might feel the worst thing to happen to her marriage is if she has to move to Akute, jump Marwa and have to go to yaba to buy bend down select To her sef as she knows from experience her husband cheating is no biggie. As long as she is the 'wifey' with all the perks its all good.
I know people who believe that a man must cheat but its all good as long as he is a 'great provider'. To some women a faithful poor man is of no use to them .I am just being truthful and factual here.

On the other hand some other women believe cheating is a deal breaker and don't mind being the co/main breadwinner as long as he does not cheat.To some its their spouse not having their back with his/her family.

I personally know someone who divorced her husband after so many years without kids. She is now married to someone else and has kids. She told me the deal breaker was the fact that he was unable to give her children. Some other person might have stayed in that marriage. I equally know another couple married for over 20 years without children and they are ok with it.

In other words like most family issues diff strokes for diff folks.

Amya:
Coming from a pseudo-feminist

Tvegas:


I love your opinion very balanced and objective. From my view Physical Abuse is the worst thing that a man or woman can endure in marriage. Beating your wife or husband or in laws is just unforgivable for me. People can easily stray into affairs and correct themselves but people dont just stray into wife beating or husband punching its innate.

damiso:
The worst thing that can happen to a marriage depends on the two individuals in a marriage and what their ideals and values are

e.g. A runs girl who dated 15 married men as a young lady was hardly ever in school and sha graduated with a pass and no employable skills whatsoever.She was eventually able to snag an 'island' big boy who married her. They live on Bannana Island she drives the best cars, always decked in Louboutins and Ferragamo (y'all know the pic i am painting ) might feel the worst thing to happen to her marriage is if she has to move to Akute, jump Marwa and have to go to yaba to buy bend down select To her sef as she knows from experience her husband cheating is no biggie. As long as she is the 'wifey' with all the perks its all good.
I know people who believe that a man must cheat but its all good as long as he is a 'great provider'. To some women a faithful poor man is of no use to them .I am just being truthful and factual here.

On the other hand some other women believe cheating is a deal breaker and don't mind being the co/main breadwinner as long as he does not cheat.To some its their spouse not having their back with his/her family.

I personally know someone who divorced her husband after so many years without kids. She is now married to someone else and has kids. She told me the deal breaker was the fact that he was unable to give her children. Some other person might have stayed in that marriage. I equally know another couple married for over 20 years without children and they are ok with it.

In other words like most family issues diff strokes for diff folks.

TooNoisy:


Only a very beautiful and intelligent woman could have typed this. You must be very intelligent, cool and calm.

Nonso23:


My friend go an sit down inside poto poto
I regret that we even share the same forum talk less of gender. You and your kind are the weak men raining on our parade.

Learn from that post . It is filled with wisdom!

bukatyne:


Interesting,

What/who is a pseudo-feminist?

Nonso23:

Sentiments galore
The solace of the weak.
Love and sex are not the same and hence serve different purposes in a union.
Many people would honor a contract better than that mere celebration in front of a congregation. Reason?
It is simply impracticable today. Being trustworthy has nothing to do with sex as a man.

Read that post again. Too much wisdom to ignore

Moana:
since sex and love are not the same thing, there is nothing in hoping your wife has extra-maritals affairs then

Nonso23:

Sentiments galore
The solace of the weak.
Love and sex are not the same and hence serve different purposes in a union.
Many people would honor a contract better than that mere celebration in front of a congregation. Reason?
It is simply impracticable today. Being trustworthy has nothing to do with sex as a man.

Read that post again. Too much wisdom to ignore

Nonso23:


Let her knock herself out as long as I don't find out

Amya:
Coming from a pseudo-feminist, it shouldn't be all that alarming.

I was reading a thread yesterday about a young women who tried to commit suicide because she found out her supposedly perfect husband was cheating on her. If she were my kid Sis, I'd have dashed her free slap for that stupidity. This same lady was just justifying her husband's actions when after an argument he pushed her so her hard she banged her head on the edge of a glass table (in the risk of a permanent head injury). This same lady condoned and even justified her husband hating her OWN mother for the flimsy reason that she made some strong recommendations while they were planning their wedding. And suddenly she finds out her husband had a plethora of runs girls at his beck and call, and she overdosed on pills! You've got to be kidding me!

Now, I know my opinion on cheating males is going to be hugely unpopular amongst the female folks in the house (especially the married ones who for some reason think their life's happiness is tied to their spouse's fidelity). I'm also not making excuse for the male folks for cheating, I'm just trying to be realistic about this society. For some reason, men cheat. Most men infact. The sooner women realise this, the happier marriages will be. Sex is not love. To men especially (and me too) sex is just a function that can stand on it's own independent of love and even affection. It's like eating.

Don't be 100% sure that your husband is not cheating or will not cheat on you. That will be living in a fools paradise my dear. It has nothing to do with how pure or holy you were growing up. let's lower our expectations as far as marriage is concerned, and I bet you you'll have a happier and fulfilled marriage.

Or you can always choose not to get married. Divorce is also an option.

Yeah, Yeah I know about the bringing another woman into the house or infecting HIV to the poor innocent wife. Yeah let's hope your husband is sensible enough to not commit to these ladies and he's not stupid enough to not use protection.

VintageCocktail:
Let's agree to disagree.
I am a man of my words, when I said I love you to my wife....I mean it......abstaining from things that will cause her pain becomes my priority not massaging my male ego and basking on the euphoria of being in a man's world and can cheat and get away with it ish. I came from a stable home and I am willing to make it more stable than my parents'.


Anyway, whatever rocks your boat.....
Coming to the bolded...this is the mentality of your average gigolos and runs girls.

Chillisauce:

I no agree with you. Nigerian men can cheat ehn. No country competes with them.
Like 99%.
Only 1% of the population practise good morals. Other Na jagwuda!
Poverty follow they cause am. Just 100naira recharge card one sisi go follow you like fly.

FrancisTony:
I can only speak for Christians.

Bible said love your wife as Christ loved his Church.
Any Christian man that supports OP will definitely not eat his cake and have it.
Adultery and Pre-marital sex is evil - shun it.

Don't be a cheat and expect submissive/respectful wife.


N/B - Quote responsibly...

Moana:
may God give you a sexually adventurous wife in Jesus Name

Stillfire:


They will not see this part of the bible. I really don't know what they preach in church.

Even my ancient Igbo foremothers dealt with recalcitrant husbands. How much more women of today trying to condone a bad and evil thing. I don't get it. Some queer statistic show Nigerian women cheat more, I don't see men trying to justify or asking themselves to condone cheating and live with it. .

zed7:


Is that what your god does? Give people sexually adventurous wives? Why are people so dull on nairaland?

FrancisTony:

Okay!

95% of married men cheat? That's your statistics, anyway.
Well, I haven't seen any trace of cheating in all married men around me.

Since I've heard few news about men that cheat, I'll say they are not up that 95%. like you ascribed

Maybe, about 40%...