Choiii... And someone is somewhere getting excited he will be getting married soon while his babe is out here describing, analyzing and/or maybe verbally dissecting his physical structure.

Abeg ooo na only dat guy I just pity cuz OP will probably be cheating on him anytime she come across any interested handsome dudes

I dey come first make I charge my phone

@Op,
You seem to have made up your mind already and know what you want,you don't need our advise in between in all honesty let him go,stop wasting his time. Change your foul mouth not for him but for your future's sake.

kagorba3:
Right now I'm confused and frustrated at the same time still I don't wanna make lifetime mistakes.


Here is my plight...There's is a young man seriously in love with me but I'm far from liking him let alone love him yet he wouldn't stop, this his relenting spirit kinda attracted me to him but still I can't find a place in my heart to accommodate him, everything about him just irritate me, he laughs uncontrollably over my not so funny jokes, from the look of things he seems so happy and settled with me yet I'm at the opposite end, whenever we have a date I do keep an eye on my wrist watch and keep wishing time flies so fast.

But I discover he is serious and focused and sound to interact and have a meaningful convo with but his physical looks is just a big turn off, I really wanna give birth to lovely kids not some "oputu poyoyo" please y'all should not tell me to look beyond looks cos these things do come into play...I'm saying this cos my mouth no good oh, anyday we have any misunderstanding I might mistakenly yab away his future.

I have been postponing giving him a yes hoping for someone presentable to show these signs of seriousness but no way, now he has fix March for the main thing, all my thoughts now is how can I maneuver my way and make all my kids take after my beauty instead of his and it's my baby girl I'm so scared for cos most baby girls take over their dad.

Note: he's not rich oh just a struggling guy before y'all will conclude I'm into his money, the only thing is he acts different from the rest that will just act so sex starved, any focus girl wants a focused guy too but to tell y'all the truth I'm still in doubt since I don't feel a thing for him and he seem not to be bothered which I'm certain he will after the main thing.

Please to the lovely ladies that once said yes to a not so presentable guy(I mean a man with bending shaped head, undefined complexion and petit in nature ) how is the journey so far

Hahahahaaa. Your explanation is funny. Marriage no be by force. If you don’t feel anything for him, then don't do. So that in future you won't Bleep another man. Btw, I thought looks is secondary to a woman.

Omotayor123:
My sister, run before it's too late if you think you can't cope with his character!

Gollibe... The character is nt the problem..
He looks like u.. Dats all

Girls sha. Keep waiting for Mr Handsome. When you don old finish, if na cripple man sef you go rush take am. Mtshewww!!... In fact go and take clay and mould ya own man... Girls done seem to understand that looks fade away. You meet this cute handsome guy with 6 packs and couple of years time the looks depreciate due to age.

kagorba3:
Right now I'm confused and frustrated at the same time still I don't wanna make lifetime mistakes.


Here is my plight...There's is a young man seriously in love with me but I'm far from liking him let alone love him yet he wouldn't stop, this his relenting spirit kinda attracted me to him but still I can't find a place in my heart to accommodate him, everything about him just irritate me, he laughs uncontrollably over my not so funny jokes, from the look of things he seems so happy and settled with me yet I'm at the opposite end, whenever we have a date I do keep an eye on my wrist watch and keep wishing time flies so fast.

But I discover he is serious and focused and sound to interact and have a meaningful convo with but his physical looks is just a big turn off, I really wanna give birth to lovely kids not some "oputu poyoyo" please y'all should not tell me to look beyond looks cos these things do come into play...I'm saying this cos my mouth no good oh, anyday we have any misunderstanding I might mistakenly yab away his future.

I have been postponing giving him a yes hoping for someone presentable to show these signs of seriousness but no way, now he has fix March for the main thing, all my thoughts now is how can I maneuver my way and make all my kids take after my beauty instead of his and it's my baby girl I'm so scared for cos most baby girls take over their dad.

Note: he's not rich oh just a struggling guy before y'all will conclude I'm into his money, the only thing is he acts different from the rest that will just act so sex starved, any focus girl wants a focused guy too but to tell y'all the truth I'm still in doubt since I don't feel a thing for him and he seem not to be bothered which I'm certain he will after the main thing.

Please to the lovely ladies that once said yes to a not so presentable guy(I mean a man with bending shaped head, undefined complexion and petit in nature ) how is the journey so far

My dear u have a talent in comedy .lol pls develop your comedic flare

kagorba3:



Huh? So caring, do you care for his contact?

You should rather drop your own contact instead.

Tell her to walk away cos she will not be happy and the marriage will not last.

There is no magic bout it when you feel nothing for a guy. Don't get into a marriage out of pity. I was once in your shoes during my undergraduate days. The guy was so much into me, pocket money, food stuff,etc. He even brought travel documents to UK but I declined. He was crying, you know what it is for a grown man to cry? It is deep affection that will help you to overcome the many challenges marriage will throw at you. Thank God I am happily married now to a man I love and who loves me double.

What does an undefined colour even mean, lol, Aunty look at tinubu, obasanjo and fashola, they ugly as shit even after the money but their wives are beautiful as Bleep. You think they were blind or they were stupid? If you see somebody that is 'focused' or has good motives towards you clinge am o, u won't be young forever my dear, two of u go ugly, soon u no go know who ugly pass, if love is in between all these things like 'head shape' 'undefined color' become trivial

kagorba3

this is the same thing I'm facing. Except that my boyfriend is very very very presentable. He is actually my best friend too. He is cute and dresses very well. He is obsessed with me even tho we've never had sex or even kissed yet. yh, lol. He's been asking me to marry him, and all the while I gave silly excuses, until recently when I realised that I just have to. Because the way he treats me eh, as if I'm a queen. He even went as far as telling friends and our pastor that we're engaged, just so no one will snatch me, lol.

I don't love him, but I have to force it because the guy has proven himself worthy.

bellong:
The most abused word in the 21st century.... LOVE.

This thread is one of the reasons we have so many fractured, battered and disintegrated homes these days.

Lack of depth from intending couples.

Love has never and can never be equated to butterfly feelings. Until people get that part right, there will always be conflict in decision making and what love is.

Gbam!!! U sounded like nollywood chief priest.

kagorba3:



Huh? So caring, do you care for his contact?

Please, can i have his contact ??

op it's obvious you're not matured enough for marriage. you don't love him yet you're considering marrying him. So what next after marriage? Cheat on him serially? kill him? divorce him?
the way you described him showed you're truly not matured enough for marriage.
osinbajo is small in size but today he's the v.p . don't be shortsighted. look at the big picture. But if you think you definitely can't stay with him, end the relationship And stop wasting your time and his.

kagorba3:


The character for now seems nice but it looks fake or something that he's enduring just to get me, cos since I don't like him at all, I don't bother with all those visitations to really access him and whenever he invites and say no he doesn't complain about it.

Babe, what you have just said up there is the gospel truth. You have just projected the driving force behind his patience and niceties on a slide. If not that this your story is recent, I would have thought you are someone I know cos I witnessed a similar thing some 7yrs ago. The guy is married now though. We were friends then.

Please don't do it. You will leave the rest of your life in regrets and will eventually resent him and chances are that you will abscond with someone else cos the type of man you desire will cross your path along the way thereafter. There is also a higher chances of you becoming emotionally unavailable for him at some point. You are not attracted to his looks and he can't change that. If he wasn't fashionable that you can fix but physical appearance that goes beyond just facial looks has no fix.

The summary of it all is "Don't do it". He will be hurt, but it's better he is hurt now than the hell you'll both live in thereafter. Take my word. There is no need jumping off a cliff with your eyes closed.

Omotayor123:
My sister, run before it's too late if you think you can't cope with his character!

She has nothing against his character but his physical look

Mindfulness:
You feel irritated in his presence and when you are with him you look at your watch because you want to quickly get away from him and yet you are considering saying yes to till death do us part? Are you mad?

Best comment so far. Op take this advice.

Onegai:
Sigh... people don't. get sarcasm...

And you took it down because people don't get it? I wouldn't.

She may not sound desperate, I think she's desperate to be a wife. You don't find someone attractive yet you have been leading him on till Mr handsome runs along. Much like if the desirable isn't available, then the available becomes the desirable. Naija gals be desperate since 19BC

Aitee1:
Chaiii...see description

Bending head shaped, undefined complexion...man pikin don suffer, I wish I can drag that guy to nairaland so he can tap sense...op take heart in advance cos after marriage you go hear as reggae go change to blues

Abi blues go change to raggae

Sister girl *in cookie's voice* you have two options, agree to the marriage or let him go.
Oh... I think I just stated the obvious.

But be warned... holding on and then dumping last minute might make him do terrible things to you(yes, people these days are crazy) so, don't lead him on.

Secondly, if you marry him for lack of options or pity, your marriage might be the worst thing to happen to you. Some men will be nice till you marry them and are knocked up, then the fangs will come out to play.

All in all, be careful and make your decision now! Don't drag the dude along.

Aitee1:
Chaiii...see description

Bending head shaped, undefined complexion...man pikin don suffer, I wish I can drag that guy to nairaland so he can tap sense...op take heart in advance cos after marriage you go hear as reggae go change to blues

I lost my phone & the contacts stored in the phone memory & sim.

Kindly inbox it to me.

You're one selfish b*itch! What the f*uck is wrong with you? If you don't feel sh*it for him, why are you f*ucking leading him on?
How would you feel if some jerk treats you the same way you b*itch are treating this poor guy?

You claimed you feel nothing for him and yet you kept having dates and spending time with him. You already planned to keep him as a side show to fall back to if the "man" you want doesn't show up. That shows how pathetic you're. You also claimed he's doesn't want to leave you alone. No b*itch, you're the one who doesn't want to leave him alone! That's why you've been leading him on, you f*ool!

I keep wondering, how the hell did that great guy meet a f*ucking selfish drama b*itch like you? You don't deserve him at all! You also claimed he's ugly and talked about him as if he was some expendable sh*it. How do we know you're not an ugly mudaf*ucking orangutan? If you think he's too ugly for you and don't feel sh*it for him, then let him go!! That's the only good thing you can do for him right now!

Yes, I believe everyone should have a choice in choosing a soulmate, but you have no right to mislead him into thinking you're into him when you're actually not interested in him!

You're not his type. Do the right thing by cutting him loose. You don't deserve him. He'll meet a good woman who'll love and treat him the way he deserves, and fortunately, you're not that woman.

Lolz I like this gal, she doesn't want to be with a wowolistic fellow in order to avoid the perpetuation of wowolism in her generation. Do whatever floats your boat girl, if na fyne you want na fyne you go get but I can't guarantee happiness o!

kagorba3:
Right now I'm confused and frustrated at the same time still I don't wanna make lifetime mistakes.


Here is my plight...There's is a young man seriously in love with me but I'm far from liking him let alone love him yet he wouldn't stop, this his relenting spirit kinda attracted me to him but still I can't find a place in my heart to accommodate him, everything about him just irritate me, he laughs uncontrollably over my not so funny jokes, from the look of things he seems so happy and settled with me yet I'm at the opposite end, whenever we have a date I do keep an eye on my wrist watch and keep wishing time flies so fast.

But I discover he is serious and focused and sound to interact and have a meaningful convo with but his physical looks is just a big turn off, I really wanna give birth to lovely kids not some "oputu poyoyo" please y'all should not tell me to look beyond looks cos these things do come into play...I'm saying this cos my mouth no good oh, anyday we have any misunderstanding I might mistakenly yab away his future.

I have been postponing giving him a yes hoping for someone presentable to show these signs of seriousness but no way, now he has fix March for the main thing, all my thoughts now is how can I maneuver my way and make all my kids take after my beauty instead of his and it's my baby girl I'm so scared for cos most baby girls take over their dad.

Note: he's not rich oh just a struggling guy before y'all will conclude I'm into his money, the only thing is he acts different from the rest that will just act so sex starved, any focus girl wants a focused guy too but to tell y'all the truth I'm still in doubt since I don't feel a thing for him and he seem not to be bothered which I'm certain he will after the main thing.

Please to the lovely ladies that once said yes to a not so presentable guy(I mean a man with bending shaped head, undefined complexion and petit in nature ) how is the journey so far

don't even dare it.....you will be fed up soonest,just be patient





https://www.nairaland.com/2718566/husbands-physique-does-not-turn

cococandy:
March is only 4months away.
What did you set for March?

Why let it get that far when you're not really into him. You're even keeping him as a back up plan in case someone better looking comes knocking.
Put yourself in his shoes and see if that's a situation you'd like to find yourself in.

Yes mummy....love your comment

kagorba3:
Right now I'm confused and frustrated at the same time still I don't wanna make lifetime mistakes.


Here is my plight...There's is a young man seriously in love with me but I'm far from liking him let alone love him yet he wouldn't stop, this his relenting spirit kinda attracted me to him but still I can't find a place in my heart to accommodate him, everything about him just irritate me, he laughs uncontrollably over my not so funny jokes, from the look of things he seems so happy and settled with me yet I'm at the opposite end, whenever we have a date I do keep an eye on my wrist watch and keep wishing time flies so fast.

But I discover he is serious and focused and sound to interact and have a meaningful convo with but his physical looks is just a big turn off, I really wanna give birth to lovely kids not some "oputu poyoyo" please y'all should not tell me to look beyond looks cos these things do come into play...I'm saying this cos my mouth no good oh, anyday we have any misunderstanding I might mistakenly yab away his future.

I have been postponing giving him a yes hoping for someone presentable to show these signs of seriousness but no way, now he has fix March for the main thing, all my thoughts now is how can I maneuver my way and make all my kids take after my beauty instead of his and it's my baby girl I'm so scared for cos most baby girls take over their dad.

Note: he's not rich oh just a struggling guy before y'all will conclude I'm into his money, the only thing is he acts different from the rest that will just act so sex starved, any focus girl wants a focused guy too but to tell y'all the truth I'm still in doubt since I don't feel a thing for him and he seem not to be bothered which I'm certain he will after the main thing.

Please to the lovely ladies that once said yes to a not so presentable guy(I mean a man with bending shaped head, undefined complexion and petit in nature ) how is the journey so far

Please out of the other prince charming,which one have proposed to you?

You need to read this..

My candid advice for the ladies

I simply laugh at the naivety of some ladies who claim they are in search of a man who will truly love them and appreciate them.

Why i laugh is because deep inside these ladies,they know if a man truly desires and appreciates them but what they are actually looking for is totally different from what they claim.

I have heard many ladies set standards as regards the type of man they want and there is absolutely nothing wrong in that except the fact that they cross the line by wanting to be with a man they have strong feelings for and even if they meet a man that truly desires them,as long as they don't have feelings for such man,its a NO.

I'm sorry to tell you this truth; many ladies will end up been an object of ridicule in their affairs until they learn the fact that all you need is a man that will truly love,appreciate and value you and every other thing is secondary.

Don't be carried away by his money,looks or razzmatazz but be sensitive to know if he sincerely wants you and cherish you. If you are fortunate to have a prince charming who also truly desires you,good for you but never make this a must.

Yes i agree that your feelings towards this person is important but your marital happiness does not lie in what you feel for him rather its the way he feels towards you.

Of what use will it be if you end up marrying a man you are crazy about but will make you cry all the time?,Of what use will it be if you end up with that man that has all you want except the fact that he turns you to a punching bag or makes you unhappy?

Some ladies are actually fortunate to end up with man of their dreams but to be on the safer side,be sensitive to know if that man truly desires you because not every man that comes for your hand in marriage truly loves and cherishes you because many guys these days marry for selfish reasons.

Trust me,its better to be with a man who truly wants,desires,appreciates you than to end up with a man you want but does not really want you.

As a lady,you are genetically structured to naturally love a man that treats you well and a cute guy will turn ugly to you when he treats you like poo while that guy you felt nothing for will look so cute and adorable to you after he treats you like a queen so the best part is that you will fall in love in a short while with any man who truly shows you he cares even if he is a short fat ugly man.(watch beauty and the beast) and you will agree with me that all a woman needs is a man that will love and cherish her all the days of her life.

That is the man you need,and not necessarily the man you are crazy about because if a woman marries a man who truly loves and cherishes her,she is complete but if she marries a man she is crazy about but does not truly love and cherish her,she is finished.

Hope this helps

https://www.nairaland.com/2440267/costly-mistake-many-ladies-make

kagorba3:



Huh? So caring, do you care for his contact?

I care for yours!

U seem to have made up your mind about not going to like him and there's only little we could do. One thing is, no Mr. Right and no Miss Right anywhere, u grow the one u have to make him/her what u want,that's refining! There are many great people that are ugly and yet, they married cute ladies and yet they have happy homes. Looks form a little in Marriage as character is the most important, u would not want to marry a very handsome dude that makes u a punching bag or wouldn't hesitate showing his affection for other ladies even right in your presence. If u marry Mr. Handsome and something goes wrong with his looks in the long run, will u quit the marriage? That couples are fine does not necessarily translate to cute kids. Seek God's face but what I know is, love can be grown, watered, nurtured and maintained. If u think u can't really get along with him, just let him go, pity and convincing u to head where u are unsure of can't save the day for u as u will be the one in it and not us. But still, looks form a part of decision but not the main pointer as that isn't stable, character matters most! Serious women know what they want and if u are one of them, follow your heart.

If you"re really pretty like you said, i"ll marry you! M 4 real...quote me,maybe i'm d ansa 2 ds ur dilemna!