Ujoan:


Why the shock
It's time for men to realize that their actions have consequences. You cannot cheat on a woman who has sacrificed so much for you and expect her to just forget it like nothing happened.
While she is willing to forgive, forgetting is a whole different matter.
This sudden search for independence is a clear indication that the woman has always felt trapped is now not ready to start living her life.
She may not even be dating her ex like OP is implying, but knowing she is living her life her way could be a huge source of consolation to her!

marbee:
why conclude quickly that your wife acted as a mistress to her politician ex boyfriend?

with no evidence,you just got a call from someone and you believe?

And your next reaction was that your wife should pack her load and leave YOUR house?

Your writeup shows that you don't trust and value your wife of 15yrs

Ujoan:


Why the shock
It's time for men to realize that their actions have consequences. You cannot cheat on a woman who has sacrificed so much for you and expect her to just forget it like nothing happened.
While she is willing to forgive, forgetting is a whole different matter.
This sudden search for independence is a clear indication that the woman has always felt trapped is now not ready to start living her life.
She may not even be dating her ex like OP is implying, but knowing she is living her life her way could be a huge source of consolation to her!

marbee:
why conclude quickly that your wife acted as a mistress to her politician ex boyfriend?

with no evidence,you just got a call from someone and you believe?

And your next reaction was that your wife should pack her load and leave YOUR house?

Your writeup shows that you don't trust and value your wife of 15yrs.

goldiam:

my problem now is if she can do this when I can pay my bills comfortably, what will she do if situation changes op you have already advised yourself

natasha:
So because your wife is now gainfully employed she has left you? Because her boss is an ex means she has left you? Does it mean every married woman who puts her dreams and goals on hold, to build up a home, raise her children till they are old enough to be in boarding school and then decide to return to work are automatically dating the men in their office?
Only GOD knows what you put the woman through to the point where she has to take a Job so far away in the east and the fact that she is desperate enough for an income Of her own that she takes an offer with an ex shows that you never treated her right the last 16 years.

God knows when women go back to their ex's its because their husbands havent turned out to be the angel he pretended to be.

Dude search yourself, you may get all the satisfaction from the comments of unmarried hormonal men bashing your wife but at the end of the day, they are not the ones who sacrificed with you the last 16 years. They are not the ones who sleep with you at night even when you are ill or when not in the mood. They are not the ones who bore and cared for your kids.
Not every woman will leave a 200k + job and relocate to be a housewife only to return to a 40k monthly job if she hasnt been through hell and back due to failed promises.

Perhaps, you are the type of man that she has to write letter to request money for pads, cosmetics, hair, maggi etc perhaps you are the type of dude she has to justify why she wants to make her hair monthly, perhaps, just perhaps....we only have your words of how wonderful a husband you have been.

Enjoy the bashing and insults your other half recieves from this public forum....I hope you find the succor you so much desire
Lord deliver us from Sons of Saul!!

goldiam:

my problem now is if she can do this when I can pay my bills comfortably, what will she do if situation changes op you have already advised yourself

OGGS2000:
I want to get something straight here, some comments here suggests that nothing is wrong for a married woman to go to her Ex and make request for jobs or favour behind the husband. Or she can do that as a revenge for a cheating husband though am yet to be accused of that. If am accused of that I will not be here. because the other woman will fill the space.

OGGS2000:
I want to get something straight here, some comments here suggests that nothing is wrong for a married woman to go to her Ex and make request for jobs or favour behind the husband. Or she can do that as a revenge for a cheating husband though am yet to be accused of that. If am accused of that I will not be here. because the other woman will fill the space.

Ujoan:


Honestly, you may just be paranoid. Nothing says a woman cannot work with her ex . . . I imagine the ex now has a family of his own. The most important thing will be to draw the line, what is and is not allowed!

You wife is alone now with the kids in school . . . she probably thinks now is the time to return to the career she once sacrificed for them.

People gossip a lot down here in the east, especially when they know a woman is not living with her husband.

You should have asked the caller why he was calling you, did he catch your wife with the politician? or he just wanted to be an amebo!

natasha:
So because your wife is now gainfully employed she has left you? Because her boss is an ex means she has left you? Does it mean every married woman who puts her dreams and goals on hold, to build up a home, raise her children till they are old enough to be in boarding school and then decide to return to work are automatically dating the men in their office?
Only GOD knows what you put the woman through to the point where she has to take a Job so far away in the east and the fact that she is desperate enough for an income Of her own that she takes an offer with an ex shows that you never treated her right the last 16 years.

God knows when women go back to their ex's its because their husbands havent turned out to be the angel he pretended to be.

Dude search yourself, you may get all the satisfaction from the comments of unmarried hormonal men bashing your wife but at the end of the day, they are not the ones who sacrificed with you the last 16 years. They are not the ones who sleep with you at night even when you are ill or when not in the mood. They are not the ones who bore and cared for your kids.
Not every woman will leave a 200k + job and relocate to be a housewife only to return to a 40k monthly job if she hasnt been through hell and back due to failed promises.

Perhaps, you are the type of man that she has to write letter to request money for pads, cosmetics, hair, maggi etc perhaps you are the type of dude she has to justify why she wants to make her hair monthly, perhaps, just perhaps....we only have your words of how wonderful a husband you have been.

Enjoy the bashing and insults your other half recieves from this public forum....I hope you find the succor you so much desire
Lord deliver us from Sons of Saul!!

sorepco:
He dumped you and avoids you!

oloyede252:
madam you have a big problem.if your husband is a cheat it doesnt mean every man is.get it

OGGS2000:
She is begging to come back to Lagos. She is still in the East. Perhaps she knows her plans has been exposed.

PresVA:
Since she's remorseful, just forgive and let her into the house but with strict conditions; no more contact whatsoever with the ex... also, let her know your stand if she ever engages in any kind of unfaithful act.. warn her strictly...

Can't you start a business for her instead of her sitting idle at home? That way she'll be busy and thoughts like this may be limited or completely eliminated. ..

Then, next time, know the details of any activity your wife wants to engage in before giving your approval. . Even those of your children too..

OGGS2000:
my wife of fifteen years left me in Lagos to work for her ex boy friend in the east. It all started one evening she got a call that she should come to take a job at the state capital. She asked me if she can go I said if you want. She did not tell me the relationship she has with the caller she said its from someone she gave her CV. She asked me to book flight for her because she will go in the morning and I did. Two days later she called that I should book flight for her to come back and I did. A day later she called that they called that she should come and resume the next day, I made another flight booking for her. When I travelled for Christmas holiday I saw she was very happy but was surprised to hear that she was paid only forty thousand naira as her salary for the month. Last year when I moved to Lagos from where we were she left a job that pays her two hundred thousand naira plus car and driver on the reason that the family should stay tougher. This got me thinking that there must be other reason for the relocation. I got a call yesterday and I was asked why I left my wife to and work for her Politian ex boyfriend if am tired of the marriage. I called her to know the relationship she has with the man that gave her work she confirmed he is her ex boyfriend. I told her she can not marry two men at a time. she has chosen to be mistress to a politician she should pack out of my house.
She is begging that I should forgive her. my problem now is if she can do this when I can pay my bills comfortably, what will she do if situation changes tomorrow.

oloyede252:
madam you have a big problem.if your husband is a cheat it doesnt mean every man is.get it

InvertedHammer:

/
In other words, she was unemployed and did not leave N200k salary to go take N40k/month salary as you falsely stated in your original post.

There is a lot of missing links in your story.
/

thorpido:
Na wa o.You ought to know what kind of job your wife is taking up.Moreover,why allow her to move that far away without being certain of the type of work?
Now that you know who she works with,tell her to laghachite azu sharp sharp,e nu go?

Ujoan:


Honestly, you may just be paranoid. Nothing says a woman cannot work with her ex . . . I imagine the ex now has a family of his own. The most important thing will be to draw the line, what is and is not allowed!

You wife is alone now with the kids in school . . . she probably thinks now is the time to return to the career she once sacrificed for them.

People gossip a lot down here in the east, especially when they know a woman is not living with her husband.

You should have asked the caller why he was calling you, did he catch your wife with the politician? or he just wanted to be an amebo!