It is left for the man to look for that woman that will not disagree but commend those statement because people have different formation.
And I guess that is why the bible says "he that findeth a wife......" with the huge supply of women in the world you would have thought the word find shouldn't have come into play;maybe just he that marries a wife would have been the line.
But if you are to leave in peace then you gotta search until you find.if you are too busy to search or too in love to sieve out women which forms the residue and keep the wife which forms the filtrate then brace up for a lifetime of pain and vexation and plent turbulence.
That is why in one of my earlier posts, l noted that every couple have their unique way of dealing with this issue of submission in their marriage. There is what Mr. A can not tolerate from his wife which would be what Mr. B likes in his wife.
There are men who raise hell when their wives take money from their wallets without first informing them even for things that is known to be needed in the home while there are also men who will laugh over it and even make jokes out of it.
We are all products of different formations and perspective varies.
And I guess that is why the bible says "he that findeth a wife......" with the huge supply of women in the world you would have thought the word find shouldn't have come into play;maybe just he that marries a wife would have been the line.
But if you are to leave in peace then you gotta search until you find.if you are too busy to search or too in love to sieve out women which forms the residue and keep the wife which forms the filtrate then brace up for a lifetime of pain and vexation and plent turbulence.
But many men assume wrongly that once you are financially comfortable getting a wife is easier, only to realise their folly afterwards because a wife is not just any woman!
It is all good my brother. It is just like here in Nairobi, l have come to a realization that Kenyan women don't "carry" their husbands on their head. If you are relating with a Nigerian married woman, in her discussions she is likely to be mentioning her husband but the Kenyan women I know, some even for years though may tell you about their kids but they don't bring up their husbands in the talk so l don't even get to know whether they are married, divorced or widowed and it is rude to ask them such unless she voluntarily give you the info, worsened by the fact one has to address them by the first name with no formality of Mrs.
repogirl: I pity people who swallow the words of their pastors hook line and sinker instead of reading the Bible for themselves in order to understand it.
So, my husband is the master while I am slave abi? Very funny. I understand that the husband is the head of the household, just as how Christ is the head of the Church.
Now, Christ the Lord and saviour who is the head of the church and son of God Almighty brought him self so low that he washed his disciples feet. Now which master /Slave relationship works that way?
These men are deluding themselves, megalomaniacs looking for respect and worship by force. God has made men and women equal heirs to his kingdom, how much more here on earth.
Granted men and women play different roles in the family but saying a wife doesn't qualify as an adviser or what not is totally wrong. Both should work together, the man doing his part and the woman supporting him where ever he needs support, not just pleasing him like a freaking puppet or doll.
This Pastor sounds as if women are to become 'oh yes master' all the time even if she is dying within, even if the husband is a violent monster who keeps battering her because he enjoys it. Or if he is a drunk womaniser who doesn't take care of his family.
Respect is very well earned and not by force or not because one so called man of God tells you that you are the master. Even masters need good counsel from subordinates all the time, so what is one so called man of God who could not hold his marriage together talking about?
I smell a pathetic sense repugnance here. Pastor Chris wasn't addressing men of the world (bullies and drunks) he was addressing men of the kingdom who are to love their wives enough to lay down their lives for them if need be.
But unfortunately,majority of women prefer to stand toe to toe and shoulder to shoulder with their husbands,and that to their own hurt.
A woman that submits to a man can make a puppet of him.the one that seeks to Lord over a man has lost her peace already
diva90: I didn't even bother to read... This is probably the reason why his marriage failed! And any husband that thinks this way is a complete failure who has refused to appreciate the worth of a woman by his side. Your wife shouldn't be your slave, she should be a companion and helpmate.
The message is old, not after the marriage saga. If you read the article, you will see where he said women are helper.
Any lady that admire the virtuous in Proverb 31 but not ready to serve the husband has a wrong sense of direction.
But many men assume wrongly that once you are financially comfortable getting a wife is easier, only to realise their folly afterwards because a wife is not just any woman!
Financial buoyancy in men is comparable to anger in humans-you can hardly make any meaningful decision while in that state of mind.
Many who married as a result of their financial buoyancy are sorry they did.
Seun: Submission doctrine makes the submissive wife dishonest. Things she knows her husband might not consent to are simply done behind his back.
Exactly. Human nature is NOT, and can never be submissive. A clear example is people revolting against their governments when they feel too much tyranny. Black people revolted against the whites during the American Civil Rights movement. LGBT people gained courage in the 21st century to stand up and demand to be treated as human beings. Children with overly strict parents tend to become sneaky and excellent liars. It doesnt matter how long, but submission is just not in human nature. Similarly, feminism started as a movement to demand equal rights for women. Men and women are equal and opposite, not 'one superior than the other'.
Financial buoyancy in men is comparable to anger in humans-you can hardly make any meaningful decision while in that state of mind.
Many who married as a result of their financial buoyancy are sorry they did.
You are so right. Many see financial buoyancy as the only indicator for being ready for marriage. Women abound but a man must search for a wife with a discerning mind. It is a simple fact that women outlive men but why shorten the life more by burdening one's self with a wrong choice.
You are thinking like an African. My wife will cut you down with her glock 19 in a blink of an eye. And she's an expert with it. Your first thought was security because you are not used to it. Security is a very easy thing to manage. Nigerians just don't know how to manage it yet. I have jumped out of Airplanes countless times. Guess what? So have tons of women in my unit. Bigger does not mean stronger. I know a lot of women who will take you down before you can say, WTF?, just by using combatives 101. The African mentality is yet to evolve and understand this fact. This is why you all are always amazed when you see women who are plumbers, mechanics, barbers, pilots, soldiers etc. Where i'm from, it is a normal thing. Move to an organized society and you will completely understand what i am talking about
You're the most stupidest thing I've seen on NL, So u think women are stronger than men? if skirmishes happen between your county and another you'll send females? ur wife (ur husband) will beat a Nigeria male with combative 101? ar even a man or woman? you seek to reverse gender roles? you want men to be submitting while women lead then? so your grand fathers built your country by effeminacy?
donnie: This post by Christ Embassy.Org Online Missions facebook page is causing heated debates...
FOR THE MARRIED WOMEN AND THOSE INTENDING TO GET MARRIED, LISTEN & TAKE HEED!!
Topic: Who is a HUSBAND and What is His Role? By Rev. Chris OyaKhilome Dsc DD
Husband does not mean the male partner in a marriage, husband means master. The reason for most problems in Christian marriages is the fact that women refute God’s definition of marriage and form theirs. They believe they are equal partners. If most women had their fathers bold enough to talk to them, they will be very successful in their marriage and they will be very happy people. Most women have never been taught by their parents, their fathers particularly and that’s their biggest problem because they don’t know who a man is, they think he is another woman.
In marriage, you have the man who is the head of that union and because he’s the head of that union, its important to understand him. You think he’s the one that needs to understand his wife and that is where you are wrong. He will eventually but you have to know the type of man you are married to and his needs.When you say you are marrying a man, you are coming under his authority. The Bible says, the man is the head of the woman (1 Corinthians 11:3) so when you marry him you come under his authority, you are not authority sharers even though you are both heirs to the kingdom of God.When you decide not to subject yourself to that authority, you are a rebel and God is not going to accept what you are doing because you are not functioning correctly.
Why did God make the woman?Making woman was not God’s original plan because after God created Adam and before He made Eve, He said in Genesis 1:31 “Then God looked over all he had made, and he saw that it was very good”. God made woman because of man so woman was not His original idea. This is reality.Genesis 2:18a “And the Lord God said “for it is not good for a man to be alone..” The Bible didn’t say “lonely” but “alone”. There is a big difference. Man wasn’t lonely but alone. Genesis 2:18b “…I will make him an help meet”. He didn’t say a partner or a supervisor or a special advisor or someone to tell him what to do.I will make him someone to help him. God gave man a responsibility so woman was made to help man achieve that responsibility. If this is understood in every home then you won’t have problems.I tell people that you don’t need a marriage seminar, you need the Word Seminar.
Let me tell you, no husband wants another mother, he has had one all his life. He doesn’t want an older sister, he probably had one.Your secret is in obedience, your secret is in listening to your husband, your secret is in doing the things that please him. When you don’t do the things that please him, you take the role of a mother or of an older sister. A man loves the one he serves (God) and the one that serves him (a good wife). He fights the one that wants to be at the same level with him (a rebellious wife).
To be happy in your family and home is the easiest thing in the world, just take your role. Take your place. That place that God gave you is a beautiful place. Its a place of peace. Its a place of love. It’s a place of excellence.Every wise person listens to wise voices (advice) but he listens to a wise voice that is presented wisely. Everyone rebels against the voice that is trying to make a fool out of him. When you want to correct your husband, don’t lord it over him,present it as a wise suggestion. Humble yourself and be smart. A wise woman will always be an influence to her husband, the foolish one will always annoy the husband, make him mad, make him angry and when you make him angry, you will be the victim.
Learn to listen to your husband, practice it, tell yourself that you are going to do it because that is where your beauty is.Once you stop listening, your beauty evaporates. You wonder why you are dressing and he can’t see it, he doesn’t remember your last hair style. Beauty is in obedience. That’s where the Glory is
Donnie: I agree with you Man of God! The bible is clear. Too much western influence among christians these days... PS: Before you begin to run your mouth, these are excerpts from Pastor Chris' Teaching several years ago and not an off-shoot of anything
After reading this many ladies who are in a hurry to marry will slow down and pray to God for the right man.
You are thinking like an African. My wife will cut you down with her glock 19 in a blink of an eye. And she's an expert with it. Your first thought was security because you are not used to it. Security is a very easy thing to manage. Nigerians just don't know how to manage it yet. I have jumped out of Airplanes countless times. Guess what? So have tons of women in my unit. Bigger does not mean stronger. I know a lot of women who will take you down before you can say, WTF?, just by using combatives 101. The African mentality is yet to evolve and understand this fact. This is why you all are always amazed when you see women who are plumbers, mechanics, barbers, pilots, soldiers etc. Where i'm from, it is a normal thing. Move to an organized society and you will completely understand what i am talking about
I know you guys want to build a matriarchal society, but remember none of these has ever dominated a patriarchal one.
The glory of God have left the west! therefore power is going somewhere else... that's why they have reprobate thinking!
History will have it that "The great white men was defeated not by the strength of his enemies but by share stupidities of his children.
You're the most stupidest thing I've seen on NL, So u think women are stronger than men? if skirmishes happen between your county and another you'll send females? ur wife (ur husband) will beat a Nigeria male with combative 101? ar even a man or woman? you seek to reverse gender roles? you want men to be submitting while women lead then? so your grand fathers built your country by effeminacy?
Why are you so dumb!
The problem with you is the same problem most Nigerians have. You are uninformed, have zero imagination, re.tarded, archaic, with very low IQ. I will attempt to enlighten you breaking down your rubbish comments and showing you how s.tupid your post is.
This i.diot has asked what if skirmishes happen between countries, who do we send? I would ask the fo.ol, don't you have women serving in the military already in every country in the world? What are their jobs? Is it not to fight? To answer your idiotic question; i would send both men and women to go fight. Why? Because they both have a stake in the country. What am i even saying. My Battalion commander is a woman. What would you do if you had to serve under her? You would refuse to fight abi? Get ready for a firing squad. What a mo.ron. Nowhere have i said to reverse roles but to treat each other as partners in a venture because to make it successful, they have to work together. There is a reason why Nigeria/Africa is the backward. What with people like you existing and worse breathing in it.
The problem with you is the same problem most Nigerians have. You are uninformed, have zero imagination, re.tarded, archaic, with very low IQ. I will attempt to enlighten you breaking down your rubbish comments and showing you how s.tupid your post is.
This i.diot has asked what if skirmishes happen between countries, who do we send? I would ask the fo.ol, don't you have women serving in the military already in every country in the world? What are their jobs? Is it not to fight? To answer your idiotic question; i would send both men and women to go fight. Why? Because they both have a stake in the country. What am i even saying. My Battalion commander is a woman. What would you do if you had to serve under her? You would refuse to fight abi? Get ready for a firing squad. What a mo.ron. Nowhere have i said to reverse roles but to treat each other as partners in a venture because to make it successful, they have to work together. There is a reason why Nigeria/Africa is the backward. What with people like you existing and worse breathing in it.
It's you and your whole generation plus country is ret@rd, backwards, Moro.nic ... how dare you talk to our greater country like that!
You are a soldier of a foreign nation and that make you an insurgent to me... see let me tell you there's nothing great war wise the Americans have accomplished since Vietnam.
I'm praying for the we face you guys.. I'll personally put a bullet in you hand.
You are thinking like an African. My wife will cut you down with her glock 19 in a blink of an eye. And she's an expert with it. Your first thought was security because you are not used to it. Security is a very easy thing to manage. Nigerians just don't know how to manage it yet. I have jumped out of Airplanes countless times. Guess what? So have tons of women in my unit. Bigger does not mean stronger. I know a lot of women who will take you down before you can say, WTF?, just by using combatives 101. The African mentality is yet to evolve and understand this fact. This is why you all are always amazed when you see women who are plumbers, mechanics, barbers, pilots, soldiers etc. Where i'm from, it is a normal thing. Move to an organized society and you will completely understand what i am talking about
so why we're bilk of the soldiers that fought in Iraq men? any ways if ud wifes a cia agent , I'm sure she'll get pregnant someday and nurse kids. stop deceiving yourself a woman can't be a man neither can a man . There are men that cook very well doesn't still change fact women are naturally drawn to keeping the home.
There are things one do not make noise about and everyone has a role to play. The formation an individual has been exposed to influences how they work their relationships and no marriage is a straight line as there have been marriages where the wives have been very submissive to their husbands but never got the love in return rather their husbands exploited that to being insensitive to their spouse feelings.
What will be the perception of a girl child growing up in such family setting?
when she goes to her husband's place and refuses to submit cos of her childhood then her marriage most likely will suffer. single mother in the making .
revolt: so why we're bilk of the soldiers that fought in Iraq men? any ways if ud wifes a cia agent , I'm sure she'll get pregnant someday and nurse kids. stop deceiving yourself a woman can't be a man neither can a man . There are men that cook very well doesn't still change fact women are naturally drawn to keeping the home.
Yes women are very maternal. But it does not mean they are glued to the home permanently. Like i said before, your perspective is that of a Nigerian who has not seen a different way and is used to the same thing. Move to an organized society and come and tell me this again.
It's you and your whole generation plus country is ret@rd, backwards, Moro.nic ... how dare you talk to our greater country like that!
You are a soldier of a foreign nation and that make you an insurgent to me... see let me tell you there's nothing great war wise the Americans have accomplished since Vietnam.
I'm praying for the we face you guys.. I'll personally put a bullet in you hand.
Good for nothing gay people.
Wait. Did you just refer to Nigeria as great? Are you high? Are you sure you are Nigerian? I need you to step outside right now and look around you. Take a deep breath, close your eyes, open them again and come back and re type your post. You are so used to suffering that it is now normal to you which is why you can open your mouth and call that cesspool great. What kind of people are these for God's sake?
I'm not speaking for feminist nor awon iyawo nylon bags. I speak for our mothers and grand mothers who exemplified and taught us the beauty in African culture.
The divorce cases flying everywhere shows that women are complaining, even pastor Chris couldn't convince his own wife to accept him as master and she his obedient slave.
I'm not talking of awon Lagos iyawo nylon bags. The examples of our mothers and grand mothers speaks volumes.
1. The husband is the head of the wife. I don't subscribe to the word master. It simply makes the women look like slaves. 2. The word husband simply means the male in the marriage union. 3. Sarah once called Abraham lord but there was an instance she advised Abraham and the Lord told Abraham to listen to Sarah. 4. Husbands are told to love their wives the way Christ loves the church. How did Christ loved the Church? He laid down his life. He did that first before we began to submit to him. A wife will not struggle to submit to a man that lay down his life for her. 5. The husband is only the domestic head of the wife but not the spiritual head. The wife has no obligation to submit to a husband whose instructions counters the word of God. 6. If there is disagreement on issues that are not directly spiritual in nature, the wish of the husband should prevail but he has to do it in love. For instance, number of kids he loves to have. The school he wants the kids to attend. etc. 7. Husband being the head doesn't necessarily mean he knows it all or more intelligent than the wife.
My advice is marry someone you know very well and someone that shares common interest and opinions with you. You can't know anyone 100% but there should be some degree of knowledge such that there are things you can boast about what he or she can do or not do.
Wait. Did you just refer to Nigeria as great? Are you high? Are you sure you are Nigerian? I need you to step outside right now and look around you. Take a deep breath, close your eyes, open them again and come back and re type your post. You are so used to suffering that it is now normal to you which is why you can open your mouth and call that cesspool great. What kind of people are these for God's sake?
Wait. Did you just refer to Nigeria as great? Are you high? Are you sure you are Nigerian? I need you to step outside right now and look around you. Take a deep breath, close your eyes, open them again and come back and re type your post. You are so used to suffering that it is now normal to you which is why you can open your mouth and call that cesspool great. What kind of people are these for God's sake?
But many men assume wrongly that once you are financially comfortable getting a wife is easier, only to realise their folly afterwards because a wife is not just any woman!
In fact I think a man with money has less chance of finding a true wife. I have seen many cases where the man was well to do, had a lavish wedding, after some years and with child, financial storm came, he lost all, and guess what, he could not believe that the so called wife turned into a devil, messed him up, they later had a terrible divorce. Another guy was fortunate, he said it was when he lost his well, high paying job for 5 years he knew that he had a treasure of a wife. She was working, and end of the month, when she brings back her salary, she will give every thing to him, so that he will decide how they will use it. Some days she will wake him in the middle of the night, that she had a bad dream about him, and she will start comforting him that e go better. the guy said if not for his wife, he was on the brink of suicide.
Many young people have never understood this life, crisis will always come, especially financial ones, woe betide you if you married the wrong woman, your eye go clear, because the misery will be much, but if you got the right one you will enjoy.
also I think it is wise for guys not to use money in begging a woman when it comes to finding wife. If you front money, you may never know her true nature. dont be stingy, but sometimes withhold it to test her, although some sharp ones can decode, but all na God.
1stCitizen: When the MODS in this forum try to make news sensational by changing the Header it negates the whole idea of a forum and depicts a news outfit. The header of the original poster is different from what the MOD placed on Front page. This is easily verified by clicking on the topic and checking the header. I hope Seun is keenly watching this carefully and be prepared for a litigation in the near future if he cannot call his MODS to order.
We do not know what transpired between that man and his wife to be honest. For a MOD to tie it to his teaching which is different from what the original poster wrote is a bit worrisome. The original poster is anonymous but the mod is a representative of Nairaland.
Seun and lalasticlala, I hope you get my drift.
Nice observation. That was not good one bit. it's quite misleading.
Seun: Submission doctrine makes the submissive wife dishonest. Things she knows her husband might not consent to are simply done behind his back.
If you are a leader, then your followers are expected to submit to your leading. Being submissive in the first place means that the woman has a will of her own but chooses to do her husband's bidding.
KingCheezyPuff: Christianity .uhm some1 mentioned me and I decided 2 stay and argue with a few of these males on this here topic.
You're a Christian? Surprising. Maybe you tag along with Christianity 'cause your family are Christians and not because you are convinced by its doctrines, no?
you think I'm trollin'?
