You might just have to hit her up.

hmmm

You can't, enlightenment can't be forced upon unresponsive people.

You either dare them and go ahead with the marriage or you
cower to their threats and break off the relationship.

It's not a friend of yours

It is you

But anyway sha

Tribe matters... a lot!

So no need convincing the parents

What we the elders sat down to see, you young, foolish and dumb wasted youths of nowadays can never see.

BigPappi:
Its already too late for me... I was rejected from imo state because of tribe and i have moved on lol

Which tribe are you?

@ op, love can conquer everything.
for your parent side make sure your ubby is rich,
i dont tink they will tink twice if he is dangote or otedola son or gej son or obj pikin

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They shouldn't run away . It never solves anything . Try to get your parents to agree. Their blessings matter a lot . Besides , if they run away to get married, won't they ever come back ? If they do come back , they should know that their parents (especially the husbands parents ) will likely never forgive them.

The main tribalists in Nigeria are igbos and hausas.
I suspect the yoruba refused because igbo is involved, no one likes them at home and abroad! Another tribe and they might consider.

There will be another civil war in nigeria against igbos, marry one at your own risk!

Easy

tosyne2much:
I still don't understand why a grown up man will give his family members the chance to decide whom or what tribe to marry from. It's nauseating I must say

i tire oh

ivolt:


Which tribe are you?

Am Edo....

tosyne2much:
I still don't understand why a grown up man will give his family members the chance to decide whom or what tribe to marry from. It's nauseating I must say

Superstition is at work here, it is widely believed that marriages without parental and
family approval won't last coupled with the threat of ostracization.

Very few men have the liver to stand by their decision.

That is why I respect Peter of Psquare who weathered all storm to stand by his wife
despite the constant harassment.

You can't. Nothing you do will erase that. They've lived for decades with that mindset. They've seen reinforcements of this stereotype for more than 3 decades at least. You can't change them. Don't waste your time.

See their respective spiritual leaders, pastors, priests, counsellors or imams, someone that has the greatest impact on their outlook on life. I can't run away because my parents don't want me to marry a particular person.

How long are you going to be hiding? Isn't hiding itself silly? An adult hiding to marry the best of the opposite sex in the entire world? Will you have any peace? Will you solve any problem eloping?

ALOWONLE419:
.TRIBE MATTERS A LOT TO ME O AS A MUSLIM, I CAN NEVER MARRY OFF MY DAUGHTER TO MY TRIBES MAN WHO IS A CHRISTIAN OR IPODS MEMBERS

If the IBO man na Muslim nkor?

Apina:

Tell your friend that she would be making the biggest mistake of her life. As a woman, it's gonna be a lose-lose situation for her, cos the day that love when dey shak her go clear for d boy eyes based on family pressure, she would have nobody to turn or run to

Was about saying this. Cant advice anyone to marry from a family who doesnt want u. Everything in a relationship isnt about love. we have to be guided

aM COMING

We have something in common.

Same way I will never marry all this dirty Yoruba girls.

Nazeren:
Tribe matters to me. Can never marry an igbo shiit.

ivolt:


Superstition is at work here, it is widely believed that marriages without parental and
family approval won't last coupled with the threat of ostracization.

Very few men have the liver to stand by their decision.

That is why I respect Peter of Psquare who weathered all storm to stand by his wife
despite the constant harassment.

That's the problem. It's not that you can't bypass family approval but would they let you have peace of mind? No I guess

BigPappi:


Am Edo....

Really, your girlfriend must have come from a very remote
part of Imo or her family are largely unenlightened because
I heard money is usually the deciding factor for Imo marriages.

Nazeren:
Tribe matters to me. Can never marry an igbo shiit.

same here dear, am sad each time someone mistakes me for an IBO guy... very annoying set of homo sapiens

they should know the reason behind their objections and if found to be of greater help or importance to their future then, they should desist from the attempts and if the reasons are insufficient to their conviction, then they should be responsible for their future and build on a solid marriage anchored with positive mind.

tosyne2much:
That's the problem. It's not that you can't bypass family approval but would they let you have peace of mind? No I guess

It will take a brave heart to take such decisions.

Is it about tribe or personality.... marrying a who're from your tribe or a vitreous woman from another. Marrying a woman beater from your tribe or a gentle man from another. Ur happiness comes first, you parents have lived their lives, they should let you live urs

The truth is that those who intend to marry MUST seek for and obtain the CONSENT, SUPPORT AND BLESSINGS of both parents. The consequences of doing otherwise could be unimaginable. Many modern day opinionists may be disagree but the truth remains the truth.

stopthecycle:
nairalanders, your advice please, someone needs your help. a friend of mine from the east wants to get married to a yoruba guy, both families are against it cuz they both want their children to marry from their tribe, my friend tells me they want to run away and get married in court...do you support this? what advice would you give them please...

They can't convince dem.

Apina:

Tell your friend that she would be making the biggest mistake of her life. As a woman, it's gonna be a lose-lose situation for her, cos the day that love when dey shak her go clear for d boy eyes based on family pressure, she would have nobody to turn or run to

How do you come up with this demonic suggestion?
I am full fledged Yoruba and my wife is from the Royal blood in Anambra, yet, we didn't have this problems.
And forget all these Yoruba and Igbo pooh on NL; if you touch my wife, you'll live to regret it!
Good enough, my in-laws do not reason as some IPOB do. When I met the King, I was more than impressed and knew that no matter our degree of tribalism, many people are still filled with their humanity.

thunderbabs:


If the IBO man na Muslim nkor?

LOL!!! You don grab am for balls

tell your friend to waittill she get parental consentBefore she marries..... Dont start your marriage on a wrong foundation. It tells in future

tosyne2much:
I still don't understand why A GROWN UP MAN will give his family members the chance to sit down to decide or discredit whom he should marry or what tribe he should marry, on the ground of stereotypes and tribalism . It's nauseating I must say

Bros those same family members are the ones u will disturb when things ain't going right. Who takes care of ur kids after u death or incapable?

Nazeren:
Tribe matters to me. Can never marry an igbo shiit.

Wow this is highly offensive even as a Yoruba man, it's disgusting. That's a terrible mindset

Please tell you friend to work with his fiance and warm up relations to his mother, sister or brother.

The truth is that there is a lot of prejudice and mindset that needs to be dismantled smartly.

It helps in this battle to have staunch allies in the unconquered territory. Tell your friend to become best friends with the guys sister, mum or brother.

This strategy worked for me. Gradually, all the other family members will warm up to her once they get to know her 1-on-1 and drop their preconceived prejudices.

My spouse is now the darling of the whole family. But it cost me a lot of years of patience and strategy.