dammy13:
I met a young lady on Twitter about seven months ago. An issue was trending on twitter back then and we had opposing opinions, we kept attacking each other to the point that she insulted me and called me a novice.

I finally entered her DM with the aim of advising her…but she was waiting with an apology which I accepted and we became pals.

After thirty days of chatting non stop we decided to meet! She lives in Port Harcourt while I’m based in Lagos, she arranged my flight, booked my hotel, without asking for money. She told me to give her when we see. I was touched.

So I met Dara, 29, she is not drop dead gorgeous, not beautiful by the standard of many but the most unusually beautiful girl I have seen. Chatty, funny and charming.

She took me to the hotel and long story short, we had sex. She didn’t spend the night with me but returned the next day to see me.

I returned to Lagos with nothing in my heart but the accomplishment of ‘catching’ another girl. I told my friends everything about her, and they laughed at how easily I laid her.

I stopped chatting with her, avoided her calls for two weeks until I realized I was hooked, not infatuation, not the sex, I was in love. I talked to my friends and they thought I was a fool. They called her ‘cheap’ ‘slut’ and all that, they said she’d sleep with everyone like that.

The thing is I don’t think Dara is like that, I think I seduced her and gave her no room to really resist. I called her and apologized for being MIA. We’ve been good since then, but my greatest regret is talking to my friends about her.

They don’t treat her well, they are convinced she is bad. “No one marries the girl they slept with on the first date” they keep telling me.

I love her, I want to marry her, she has given me no cause to worry… I want to believe my friends are wrong on this! Is there a guy here who married a lady he slept with on the first date? Am I safe? I haven’t proposed but I know I want to marry her…

https://goldmyne.tv/featured/matters-heart-sex-first-time-make-bad/

Both of you did it, both of you enjoyed it.
If she is cheap, you are CHEAP too

The most useless and dumb question I've ever come across, wtf is wrong with marrying a lady you had sex with on your first date.

I think a lady composed this story. Well, i have no problem dating and marrying a girl whom I had sex with on the first date. It’s not like she forced it on me or something. In fact I appreciate such girls more cos they’re upfront with their desires. No need for me to be calculating what she wants.

famosh:


I never disvirgin anybody before, baba! Even if I have, it's not absurd to only want to marry a virgin! I won't care who gets married to them! That's life!
Wanting to marry a virgin (which is definitely under the persons control) is way better than you guys who select based on things that aren't even the fault of the opposite sex; for example, weight, height, complexion & other physical features!

and what is the guarantee that you will not be a male olosho, infect her with STD and make her fight with side-chicks everyday and make her come crying on nairaland with stupid stories that we don't care for. After all you've confirmed that you're a randy, non-virgin womanizer? Why should your wife trust you?

divinelove:


The girl is loose and far from a wife material, do not say you are not warned.

As opposed to the guy who is tight and husband material se?

Speakdatruth:

Some of you cannot differentiate between a fictional story and what could happen in reality. Don't get yourself worked out on nothing.

It's fictional now that it's doesn't not suit you but if the tables were turned, you'll be commenting up and down "fear women", "girls are olosho", "Nigerian girls are too broke and only sell their pvssy", "yen yen yen and other short stories". Abegiiiiiiiii

Saff:
exactly, but then these guys will shout against it completely to get what they want. But behind your back they’re laughing at you. I even think this situation is better because at least they were speaking for a month before they met up. So they were already familiar with each other before having sex. The guy is just an idiott.

please don’t blame guys in general , blame this fool , it’s not like it’s their first date, they were already talking for about 30 days according to him , the lady was really nice to him , but this fool choose to not see that but rather take the words of those stupid Lots he calls friends..

Kyllahmc:
Lol keep comparing yourself to a man and keep doing everything he does... it's still your reputation that would be ruined whether you like it or not. not his...

If you think this is only about reputation and not about character then you've not be following the stories on the internet with married men cheating flagrantly because men have been taught that they have no reputation to preserve so they behave like wild animals, without discipline knowing no one will correct them.

It's the same thing with a spoilt, over-pampered child. He talks anyhow, he steals what he wants, he beats anyone because he had been taught that "unlike other people", his "reputation" will not be "ruined". But he does not know he is growing up into a masquerade that will regret it in his old age.

Keep saying its only women's reputation that will be ruined, do not learn discipline and self-control. In the next couple of months a new set of statistics on HIV in Nigeria will be released and even then your "gender" or "undestroyable reputation" will not save you. Peace.

milemimi93:


Guy don't just rush to comment. Always read the post and read with understanding.

The op said the lady told him to refund the money when they meet.

Which naija girl will spend on a man?
She collected her money back and probably with interest.

And so? If she does not collect the money back he will still tag her as cheap for having sex on the first date so she might as well collect it back. She can't lose both ways.

Saff:
This is it.

They will tell you “ It doesn’t matter, if you sleep with me on the first date it doesn’t mean anything, we’re all mature”

Behind your back it’s a different story. And it has everything to do with their ego and pride. Never listen to their words, always their actions smh. She even paid for your hotel and flight, and you had the nerve to mock her to your friends? Ungrateful cow, you’re not even ashamed.

Listen, you’re a grown man and if you can’t learn to make decisions without the influence of your friends, you won’t go far in life. If you can’t deal with the shame, spare the babe and let her live her life. All these sissy boys sef, can’t make a simple decision for anything. Always gossiping and crying later like bitches. Spits.

CAN I HAVE YOUR NUMBER?
I want tell you something ni.
Is not what you are thinking.

milemimi93:

Marry her at your own disadvantage.. It's not because of the first date sex.. Women are naturally lousy

etymology ▼ showadjective  (comparative lousier,superlative lousiest)
* Remarkably bad; of poor quality, dirty, or underhanded; mean,contemptible.
From the definition above out of this guy and the girl who is really lousy?

bethyz:
Sex on the first day doesnt really matter. If you want to be holy be holy. Do what you feel its right at that point. Do what yur mind says.

Knew my husband on phone for some time before we met physically. The second time we saw each other we had sex. . Dated for two years with good sex before we got married. The way we saw it we were meant for each other nobody was going anywhere . We married now and still loving it.

Lol no offence but are you gay?

Respect55:

I pity d guy u r with

This is what I hate about guys like you. She is simply saying the same things that many nairaland guys have said about women. Never did I see you call them out or criticize them for once but when a woman says, "this is what men are saying or thinking about us", you come and attack her like you were blind, deaf and dumb when your fellow guys were calling us olosho, kissing and telling and doing the same despicable things. Kindly pack well sir, thank you.

Saff

Respect55:

Why are you sounding so pained? Is everything alright?

Abeg leave her and go and face your fellow guys who say the same about women. She is not complaining in a vacuum, she did not pluck the argument from thin air, she has read it time and time again here on nairaland. Do your part by calling out guys who say this. simple.

Are you a hypocrite? Yes you are. You have been talking for seven good month, chatting, video calling and all that.
The two of you did it at first contact. Somebody is thinking without conscience here.

famosh:


Which kin talk be this? How can you say sex is nothing? Having casual sex as if it's nothing already tells the kind of mentality one has!
For me, my wife even has to be a virgin in addition to other qualities!

Are you a virgin? Are you saying being a virgin is not a good quality for a man? Do you know irrespective of your gender if you fornicate you will got to hell fire? Do you know that God does not know whether it is a man's right to fvck around or not when judgement day arrives? Have a lovely day bro.

MarieSucre:


As opposed to the guy who is tight and husband material se?

Lol but you and I knows her thing would have marked alot of registers

We all want a wife DT is a bit reserved not someone who sleeps arnd on first date

so you mean because a girl make you go hell before fucking her,you gonna respect and marry her. or because a girl hard sex with you on the first date she is a slut.try and stroll into her DM you will see alot of ignore messages. nigga HOW OLD ARE YOU?

OkpaAkuEriEri:
She is a chip beach.
Only.mumu wee marry ha

Mumu.lyk u

MAYBE if you get married to a virgin,just maybe,cause all this holy holy long skirt sisters i dont trust them.they are all fuckers,come to kwara state come and see hijab sisters at every coner at night.just pray god should give you ya RIBS

divinelove:


Lol but you and I knows her thing would have marked alot of registers

We all want a wife DT is a bit reserved not someone who sleeps arnd on first date

you are there.they forgot we dont do olosho with trees,water,air but with them,they tag us olosho.if u wear nice out fit u r olosho, u r pretty,you are olosho,u build a house olosho,u buy a car olosho,you post wedding pic olosho,u post pre birthday pic olosho. but guys why now.

MarieSucre:


This is what I hate about guys like you. She is simply saying the same things that many nairaland guys have said about women. Never did I see you call them out or criticize them for once but when a woman says, "this is what men are saying or thinking about us", you come and attack her like you were blind, deaf and dumb when your fellow guys were calling us olosho, kissing and telling and doing the same despicable things. Kindly pack well sir, thank you.

Saff

mhizcassidy001:
MAYBE if you get married to a virgin,just maybe,cause all this holy holy long skirt sisters i dont trust them.they are all fuckers,come to kwara state come and see hijab sisters at every coner at night.just pray god should give you ya RIBS

U r right Sha na God
I tell guys DT one man's bae is another man's whor.e

All na packaging

mhizcassidy001:
MAYBE if you get married to a virgin,just maybe,cause all this holy holy long skirt sisters i dont trust them.they are all fuckers,come to kwara state come and see hijab sisters at every coner at night.just pray god should give you ya RIBS

U r right Sha na God
I tell guys DT one man's bae is another man's whor.e

MarieSucre:


Are you a virgin? Are you saying being a virgin is not a good quality for a man? Do you know irrespective of your gender if you fornicate you will got to hell fire? Do you know that God does not know whether it is a man's right to fvck around or not when judgement day arrives? Have a lovely day bro.

Madam, I don't know why you Nigerians are like this! You don't have a problem with people who choose spouses based on physical appearance which is the way God created them, but you have a problem with people who don't want to marry a "non-virgin" which was under their control, right?

Again, even if I'm not a virgin, it's not absurd to want to only marry a virgin! You don't complain when short & dark guys or girls claim they want to marry a tall & fair person when they're, in fact, the opposite of what they seek! It happens all the time, madam! That's life!

BiafranBushBoy:

Easy... Easy... Easy...
The story is fiction.
Now breath in and out...
Nice!

Lol... Mo for ooo...

MarieSucre:

Abeg leave her and go and face your fellow guys who say the same about women. She is not complaining in a vacuum, she did not pluck the argument from thin air, she has read it time and time again here on nairaland. Do your part by calling out guys who say this. simple.

So throwing tantrums unnecessary on social Media is a yes to u

MarieSucre:


This is what I hate about guys like you. She is simply saying the same things that many nairaland guys have said about women. Never did I see you call them out or criticize them for once but when a woman says, "this is what men are saying or thinking about us", you come and attack her like you were blind, deaf and dumb when your fellow guys were calling us olosho, kissing and telling and doing the same despicable things. Kindly pack well sir, thank you.

Saff

Bird of a feather

Marry her if you love her. Is not big deal. People have denied so many of there friends Opportunity of marrying good girls they meet because of irrelevant caricature and cheap gossip of so many things. Sex before marriage is not ideal whether first or 10th day, is same thing. If there is cheap stuff here, I think is both of you

I slept with my fiancée the first day she visited me. We've been together for 5 years. And we are getting married this October. There is no big deal. The dating started only so its not exactly the first day.


Naija and wahala... Love is different from sex.

MarieSucre:


And so? If she does not collect the money back he will still tag her as cheap for having sex on the first date so she might as well collect it back. She can't lose both ways.

If op said the lady did all those stuffs without asking for a refund maybe my mentality towards y'all naija women would have changed. I'd have droped the notion that 'all naija women are the same'. My work today maybe would have bin reaching out to ladies I might have hurt either by my words or actions and telling them how sorry I am. Starting from my uncles wivies down to NwanyiAwkaetiti and UyaiIncomparabl. But you see! Y'all are the same. Religion, tribe or education couldn't change y'all. Ho.es gonna be ho.es. I feel sorry for men who still take y'all as wivies and girlfriends.

The said lady is 29yo and she's desperate. Looking for who she will trapped with her fake kindness.

Y'all are written-off.
Y'all are disgusting.

MarieSucre:


fixed.

Laughs...I read it like thrice before I realized it was edited...Cuz I was like,, this wasn't how I placed the words.....

I hope you didn't think I am laying the blame on just the lady....The miss was tryna blame just the dude for being confused forgetting the lady should be faulted as well.

sarahade:


Who says she's not having a second thought too.

Who sleeps with a girl on the first date with the intention of dating her. He is only having second thought because the sex is good.

And my brother these things don't just happen I'm I crazy sleep with someone I don't know his medical history hmmm my brother they are just useless people who have no self control and respect for their body.

If he's having second thought he shouldn't date her she has nothing to loose so does he. Next time if he meets a girl he will get to know her before sticking his third leg in her vagina.

There you go,, our reasoning as humans differs...

My wife slept with me the first day she came to visit, u would think she was cheap right? she wasn't, she had been celibate for two years b4 then cos of a heartbreak from her ex who married someone else while he was still wit her cos they were not of the same tribe, it was a colleague of his who was disgusted by his action that told her. He was so callous that even on his wedding day he was calling to check on her while she was traveling to Lagos on a business trip. Also at that same time she had about two suitor who were earnestly seeking her hand in marriage ( both of them were well to do) yet she paid her own transport traveled down PH were i was residing then and we did it. When a decent girl does something she would not be too proud to tell her friends just for you, just know that she has fallen in love wit u without realizing dat herself. She spent the remaining 18 months of our courtship trying to prove her love without knowing that i already know. I am glad dat i was matured enough to know the difference btw a cheap girl and one who does crazy things for love. Today am glad i married her, she still does those crazy things and interestingly i dont have trust issues wit her.
The lady u described does not look cheap to me, she seems to be an independent lady who has been unlucky to meet pple who cannot see beyond her financial status or beauty, i think u connected with her during ur chat, and she trusted u enough to be dat stupid, i guess she was wrong abt u cos u r a typical nigerian man who equates playing hard to get to decency