bukatyne: Did he not insult her husband by calling him a 'woman'? Michky. I don't know it all, but it would be foolish of me to start learning how to be bitter like you. I intend to improve daily and not otherwise.

Me Bitter? Thats by the way for now. And you say he insulted her husband by calling him a woman. Eh? Know what, i want to attend to one of your previous posts first. Then we'll deal with this matter later. Excuse me.

@Michky... I've asked this before and ask again, when we talk about household chores division , what and what can you or not do?
I understand your standpoint very very well, you don't want your woman telling you what to do ko? cos they tend to make it a hobby , I get it.
But wouldn't it be nice/ romantic if you could help with manly stuff like shovelling, mowing lawn , fix stuff round the house , gas the vehicles/ take to car wash and so on? Mind you , you can pay to do those things too without anybody/ bills suffering from those extra expenses.

Lets leave @Jallowbah out of this, she's not Nigerian and didn't even marry one so I don't see why going back & forth with her. I respect her values but 95%Nigerian men are way afar from that attribute and that's why the Topic kept coming up gazillionth time.That being said, whatever works for everybody ( I know it's kinda cheesy )

jidegirl12:
Lets leave @Jallowbah out of this, she's not Nigerian and didn't even marry one so I don't see why going back & forth with her. I respect her values but 95%Nigerian men are way afar from that attribute and that's why the Topic kept coming up gazillionth time.That being said, whatever works for everybody ( I know it's kinda cheesy )

Nah, you kan keep ME in it, but my husband can stay out He is west-african though, and comes from a country where it is not normal for a man to help out around the house.
Still, HE does it. Individuals, and all that.

bukatyne: At the bolded, a woman can share financial responsibilities with her husband BUT the husband can't share domestic reponsibilities with the wife?

No long thing. If you had been attentively listening to US, the MEN, on this thread, you'll notice that what we have been re-stating is heavily simple. WE ARE SAYING, DONT ALLOCATE YOUR CHORES TO US. Simple! If we decide to help you by freewill, fine. Just dont expect that because did it today, then it has become our own share of homekeep daily (which is your sole responsibility btw). Now, you're probably going to say: if i share in the finance, then he should do same with chores. Right? WRONG! Why? BECAUSE IT IS MARRIAGE. That is how it has been and should remain. How do i mean? Now gimme all your attention rightnow. You see, all institutions come with status, roles and duties. Education institution, political inst., family inst., etc. If you notice, most of these institutions have distinct role players and duties expected of them. If most of these institutions have been tampered with, the way you're aiming to do for marriage presently, most of them would have lost effectiveness or would have become extinct. Eg,YOU CANT ENROL IN A SCHOOL FOR INSTANCE AND EXPECT THE VC TO DO YOUR ASSIGNMENTs FOR YOU. Can you? ANSWER ME!!!

Michky: Who cares if you're white or black. If you like, be purple for all i care. And if you like, get a house on atlantic. ALL OF YOU FEMALES WORLDWIDE ARE and will remain THE SAME to me. Get off your high horse sweetie. I virtually interact with white girls/women everyweek and i can assure you that its the same poo that resides in your heads as that of blacks. Honestly, i dont know which color has more poo-in-the-head endowment between both races. One more striking similarity between you and the ones on this thread is POVERTY. All of you wont be saying this rubbish if you are financially endowed.

Yeah, you do`t care, right. Riiight.

And if my husband was damn rich, and did not worked more than 8hours every day, I would still work part-time, and like I said before; then most of the chores would be on me.
Just sitting around the house being a house-wife all day is NOT for me, but it IS for other women.

Michky: No long thing. If you had been attentively listening to US, the MEN, on this thread, you'll notice that what we have been re-stating is heavily simple. WE ARE SAYING, DONT ALLOCATE YOUR CHORES TO US. Simple! If we decide to help you by freewill, fine. Just dont expect that because did it today, then it has become our own share of homekeep daily (which is your sole responsibility btw). Now, you're probably going to say: if i share in the finance, then he should do same with chores. Right? WRONG! Why? BECAUSE IT IS MARRIAGE. That is how it has been and should remain. How do i mean? Now gimme all your attention rightnow. You see, all institutions come with status, roles and duties. Education institution, political inst., family inst., etc. If you notice, most of these institutions have distinct role players and duties expected of them. If most of these institutions have been tampered with, the way you're aiming to do for marriage presently, most of them would have lost effectiveness or would have become extinct. Eg,YOU CANT ENROL IN A SCHOOL FOR INSTANCE AND EXPECT THE VC TO DO YOUR ASSIGNMENTs FOR YOU. Can you? ANSWER ME!!!

That's marriage to you, fine. We were once running about in pants and barefeet. That is how it has been and it must remain that way. I guess the VC can't do your assignments but you can help the VC conduct the convocation ceremony.

jidegirl12: @Michky... I've asked this before and ask again, when we talk about household chores division , what and what can you or not do?
I understand your standpoint very very well, you don't want your woman telling you what to do ko? cos they tend to make it a hobby , I get it.
But wouldn't it be nice/ romantic if you could help with manly stuff like shovelling, mowing lawn , fix stuff round the house , gas the vehicles/ take to car wash and so on? Mind you , you can pay to do those things too without anybody/ bills suffering from those extra expenses.

Lets leave @Jallowbah out of this, she's not Nigerian and didn't even marry one so I don't see why going back & forth with her. I respect her values but 95%Nigerian men are way afar from that attribute and that's why the Topic kept coming up gazillionth time.That being said, whatever works for everybody ( I know it's kinda cheesy )

I dont think she's asking for any special treatment. I just go alittle lost when she started the i-am-white campaign. I think everyone participating in this argument is humble enough and that's applaudable. If Jallowbah wants to continue to really enjoy this faceless forum, its best she contines to blend-in as she's been doing so far. No one is gonna get special treatment from me. *sighs* Now to your question, i as a man knows my duties in the home. Its good you mentioned it. Men dont wanna be told what to do by women. If a responsible husband cant do the heavy stuff, he wont call wifey to do his duty. He will mostlikely find a solution to it (paid/free). Same goes to wives. The home chores (cooking, cleaning etc) are hers. She shouldnt even dare ask me to wash her undies. If she cant, she should find a solution to it (free/paid). I dont care how you do it. Just get it done!

bukatyne: That's marriage to you, fine. We were once running about in pants and barefeet. That is how it has been and it must remain that way. I guess the VC can't do your assignments but you can help the VC conduct the convocation ceremony.

hahaha...nice one. Hmm...someone is forming smartness here o. Going by your new route, i have one reply for you. So because we evolved from bareness to clothing, marriage should also evolve from man&woman to man&man or woman&woman right? You see girl, stop raising irrelevant examples. Plus looking at the VC issue, question is in your to-be marraige, you would be the VC and your husband will be the student abi? Interesting.

Michky: I dont think she's asking for any special treatment. I just go alittle lost when she started the i-am-white campaign. I think everyone participating in this argument is humble enough and that's applaudable. If Jallowbah wants to continue to really enjoy this faceless forum, its best she contines to blend-in as she's been doing so far. No one is gonna get special treatment from me. *sighs* Now to your question, i as a man knows my duties in the home. Its good you mentioned it. Men dont wanna be told what to do by women. If a responsible husband cant do the heavy stuff, he wont call wifey to do his duty. He will mostlikely find a solution to it (paid/free). Same goes to wives. The home chores (cooking, cleaning etc) are hers. She shouldnt even dare ask me to wash her undies. If she cant, she should find a solution to it (free/paid). I dont care how you do it. Just get it done!

I was not the one talking about how "I come here and talk about how naija-women should fell, blablabla". That was you.

And again, all you are saying, is how YOU do it, and want it, and that is what I am doing as well. And I do not sit down and trash your way, I have simply been saying all along how I want it, and how I have it. But you, on the other hand, feel a need to trash anyone who want something different than you.

My husband comes to me and ask me to help if he need it. If he can not cut the grass cause his back is paining, he will ask me to do it. No problem there.

Michky: Who cares if you're white or black. If you like, be purple for all i care. And if you like, get a house on atlantic. ALL OF YOU FEMALES WORLDWIDE ARE and will remain THE SAME to me. Get off your high horse sweetie. I virtually interact with white girls/women everyweek and i can assure you that its the same poo that resides in your heads as that of blacks. Honestly, i dont know which color has more poo-in-the-head endowment between both races. One more striking similarity between you and the ones on this thread is POVERTY. All of you wont be saying this rubbish if you are financially endowed.

i was going to say the same thing , this girl is always playing the race card ...yeaaa jallo you know dey tire na waa oo

JallowBah:

Yeah, you do`t care, right. Riiight.

And if my husband was damn rich, and did not worked more than 8hours every day, I would still work part-time, and like I said before; then most of the chores would be on me.
Just sitting around the house being a house-wife all day is NOT for me, but it IS for other women.

Attention ladies and gentlemen, this post has revealed the point where all these matter started (historically). Before all these girls entered the bandwaggon, it all started with the wives-must-work syndrome. Now, y'all have almost completely prevailed with that. And as we are witnessing, wives are asking men to wash their undies. IN THE NEAR FUTURE, WOMEN WILL START CLAMORING FOR LAWS TO BE PROMULGATED INSTRUCTING MEN/HUSBANDS TO START CARRYING PREGNANCY FOR 3 MONTHS OR SO. I laff at where all these will end up. In the longrun, family (in terms of man, woman and children) will sieze to exist. As the title of this thread reads: "What exactly is man's duty in the home nowadays", questions like "WHAT IS THE USE OF MAN IN THE HOME NOWADAYS" will be the one making headlines in future. Sad.

.

JallowBah:

I was not the one talking about how "I come here and talk about how naija-women should fell, blablabla". That was you.

And again, all you are saying, is how YOU do it, and want it, and that is what I am doing as well. And I do not sit down and trash your way, I have simply been saying all along how I want it, and how I have it. But you, on the other hand, feel a need to trash anyone who want something different than you.

My husband comes to me and ask me to help if he need it. If he can not cut the grass cause his back is paining, he will ask me to do it. No problem there.

You gladly throw your husband into the discuss but we must never mention him. Look, next time, keep whatever you dont like "thrashed" private. Ok? Again, if your husband doesnt find it offensive to wash your undies, i do! Ok? In fact, pardon we if i find it very offensive and craziy when you, and those two threadmates of yours, mention it on a public forum as this. Remember that the majority of members are Nigerians. STOP POLLUTING OUR GIRLS HERE. Now can this matter be put to rest?

Michky: You gladly throw your husband into the discuss but we must never mention him. Look, next time, keep whatever you dont like "thrashed" private. Ok? Again, if your husband doesnt find it offensive to wash your undies, i do! Ok? In fact, pardon we if i find it very offensive and craziy when you, and those two threadmates of yours, mention it on a public forum as this. Remember that the majority of members are Nigerians. STOP POLLUTING OUR GIRLS HERE. Now can this matter be put to rest?

No, it can not be put to rest, of the simple fact that your mind is so narrow, that you are not able to see that people live different from you, and are HAPPY about that.

And Cameroon, I do not always play the race-card, don`t even try. What happens in here is that people start saying "you are not even african, don`t come here with any talk". It is a public forum, I can tlak however I feel like, the only difference is that I still have some respect for people in my words here.

Bah.

Is washing underwear the big issue here now? Cos I can't go back all the way to page 1 to find out , @jallowbah , our men don't wash underwear, it translates a bad omen to our society, I sure will throway that laundry basket if I see my brothers doing that.
you see why I said your arguing with these guys is baseless, we have different culture which you don't seem to agree, I'm not saying you shouldn't be part of it but thinking it works here is a no no.
And@ Michky, lol at 'stop polluting your girls' .. your 'girls' with no proper or no home training, your girls that shouts equality yet wants men to feed them,clothe them and still give them pocket money even tho they make minimum wages, girls that wants to sit and deligate chores to their men... need I say more?
Abegi, stop blaming @jallow for your problems, a lady that went all her way to Africa to support her man with a toddler, your 'girls' will probably complain of Mosquitos and rather wait till he comes back even tho they were born with flying Mosquitos in their mouth in their village.
I pray everyday for God to cast away some of them here from my families dwellings cos what they say sometimes shock me!

jidegirl12: Is washing underwear the big issue here now? Cos I can't go back all the way to page 1 to find out , @jallowbah , our men don't wash underwear, it translates a bad omen to our society, I sure will throway that laundry basket if I see my brothers doing that.
you see why I said your arguing with these guys is baseless, we have different culture which you don't seem to agree, I'm not saying you shouldn't be part of it but thinking it works here is a no no.
And@ Michky, lol at 'stop polluting your girls' .. your 'girls' with no proper or no home training, your girls that shouts equality yet wants men to feed them,clothe them and still give them pocket money even tho they make minimum wages, girls that wants to sit and deligate chores to their men... need I say more?
Abegi, stop blaming @jallow for your problems, a lady that went all her way to Africa to support her man with a toddler, your 'girls' will probably complain of Mosquitos and rather wait till he comes back even tho they were born with flying Mosquitos in their mouth in their village.
I pray everyday for God to cast away some of them here from my families dwellings cos what they say sometimes shock me!

I don't think how your brothers marriages work is your concern. We all have boundaries. I'm sure your husbands does some things his family would find offensive.

Michky: hahaha...nice one. Hmm...someone is forming smartness here o. Going by your new route, i have one reply for you. So because we evolved from bareness to clothing, marriage should also evolve from man&woman to man&man or woman&woman right? You see girl, stop raising irrelevant examples. Plus looking at the VC issue, question is in your to-be marraige, you would be the VC and your husband will be the student abi? Interesting.

And you deduced all these from my post? Now that's interesting!

jidegirl12: Is washing underwear the big issue here now? Cos I can't go back all the way to page 1 to find out , @jallowbah , our men don't wash underwear, it translates a bad omen to our society, I sure will throway that laundry basket if I see my brothers doing that.
you see why I said your arguing with these guys is baseless, we have different culture which you don't seem to agree, I'm not saying you shouldn't be part of it but thinking it works here is a no no.
And@ Michky, lol at 'stop polluting your girls' .. your 'girls' with no proper or no home training, your girls that shouts equality yet wants men to feed them,clothe them and still give them pocket money even tho they make minimum wages, girls that wants to sit and deligate chores to their men... need I say more?
Abegi, stop blaming @jallow for your problems, a lady that went all her way to Africa to support her man with a toddler, your 'girls' will probably complain of Mosquitos and rather wait till he comes back even tho they were born with flying Mosquitos in their mouth in their village.
I pray everyday for God to cast away some of them here from my families dwellings cos what they say sometimes shock me!

I have known about many african men, even nigerians, who wash underwear..but, in EU, I have not been in Naija, so can`t say what goes on behind closed doors

The point in all, as I have said before, is that as long as the wife AND the hubby is happy in their marriage, they decide for them self. Michky, on the other hand, strongly believes that my husband is a "woman" because he do chores around our house, and that is bull.

And yes, I did went all the way down there. No electricity, no laundry-machine ( which, I pointed earlier, we neither have had all the time in my country during our marriage.. ), no kitchen..I was just happy we had a working toilet, even though we had to shower with a bucket most of the time And still...I like it more down there than here.

And I do agree, I see many women who are working, getting payed, and does not pay ANYTHING at home, food, phone-bills etc, cause "thats the husbands duty". I find that...disturbing.

JallowBah:

I have known about many african men, even nigerians, who wash underwear..but, in EU, I have not been in Naija, so can`t say what goes on behind closed doors

The point in all, as I have said before, is that as long as the wife AND the hubby is happy in their marriage, they decide for them self. Michky, on the other hand, strongly believes that my husband is a "woman" because he do chores around our house, and that is bull.

And yes, I did went all the way down there. No electricity, no laundry-machine ( which, I pointed earlier, we neither have had all the time in my country during our marriage.. ), no kitchen..I was just happy we had a working toilet, even though we had to shower with a bucket most of the time ;DAnd still...I like it more down there than here.

And I do agree, I see many women who are working, getting payed, and does not pay ANYTHING at home, food, phone-bills etc, cause "thats the husbands duty". I find that...disturbing.

If a man can decide that he doesn't want to do any house chores in his own home, why can't a woman decide not to contribute any money in her own home?

bukatyne: If a man can decide that he doesn't want to do any house chores in his own home, why can't a woman decide not to contribute any money in her own home?

If the husband think it is ok, good for them!

But for ME...I don`t know. It`s just not fair in my eyes. I would not feel proud spending all my money on my self, and expecting him to take full responsibility for finances. Again, that is ME.

bukatyne: If a man can decide that he doesn't want to do any house chores in his own home, why can't a woman decide not to contribute any money in her own home?

What are you talking about for crying out loud bukatyne , like seriously you need to take a serious chill pill.
I repeat you don't get to delegate chores for him, his initiative will do that IF he loves you or better you get the hell out of marriage, it's not by force.

Interesting what I've missed. @JallowBAh Just wait till that hussy of yours sees a meaty babe in the right areas that is willing to be his beck and call then I suppose you'll come here preaching something else. There are Lions in Africa and from Africa but if you've succeeded in taming one then I'll see how long he'll stay a domesticated cat. For others that pretend to be 'domesticated cats' lets wait till some good forex enters their account. They'll be worse than rulers in Africa. All this boils down to money. A man melows when there isn't enough to act out. @Jallowbah and @bukatyne just remember I told u so.

jidegirl12: @Michky... I've asked this before and ask again, when we talk about household chores division , what and what can you or not do?
I understand your standpoint very very well, you don't want your woman telling you what to do ko? cos they tend to make it a hobby , I get it.
But wouldn't it be nice/ romantic if you could help with manly stuff like shovelling, mowing lawn , fix stuff round the house , gas the vehicles/ take to car wash and so on? Mind you , you can pay to do those things too without anybody/ bills suffering from those extra expenses.

Lets leave @Jallowbah out of this, she's not Nigerian and didn't even marry one so I don't see why going back & forth with her. I respect her values but 95%Nigerian men are way afar from that attribute and that's why the Topic kept coming up gazillionth time.That being said, whatever works for everybody ( I know it's kinda cheesy )

I know the likes of Jallowbah. Seen a lot of ur type in Sweden and across Europe. They want that raw African that they can forcefully mould to what they want. If you'll take my advice madam. Enjoy ur man. Let him be himself. You restrict in the name of you wanting to be happy, then madam unhappiness beckons at ur door. To be forewarned is to be forearmed

bukatyne: I don't think how your brothers marriages work is your concern. We all have boundaries. I'm sure your husbands does some things his family would find offensive.

Hehehe...What do you know? It sure is my concern and MY opinion counts in the end. You have no freaking idea!

sleekman:

I know the likes of Jallowbah. Seen a lot of ur type in Sweden and across Europe. They want that raw African that they can forcefully mould to what they want. If you'll take my advice madam. Enjoy ur man. Let him be himself. You restrict in the name of you wanting to be happy, then madam unhappiness beckons at ur door. To be forewarned is to be forearmed

Hehehe... take his advice

JallowBah:

If the husband think it is ok, good for them!

But for ME...I don`t know. It`s just not fair in my eyes. I would not feel proud spending all my money on my self, and expecting him to take full responsibility for finances. Again, that is ME.

fair? Is anything in life fair? Is it fair ure born in comfort and I'm not?
Is it fair that your government gives you a stipend if ure out of work and we have to hustle, and do all manner offs just to survive?
Is it fair that you get to impose what you want on your man because you couldn't get the Swedish men to do same?
Is it fair that your husband works and comes home to do chores while u a full house wife or a parttime wife sits home to tutor us on fairness?
Is it fair that you'll not allow ur hubby to hustle enough and send to his family dependent on him back home just because one you wants equity in house chores?
U absolutely know nothing of your husband and his people. If you did you wouldn't chat this way. Do you know how abject poverty looks like? How much have you sent to your mother-in-law? Have u ever sent her something? Wake up lady and let ur man be a lion.

sleekman:

fair? Is anything in life fair? Is it fair ure born in comfort and I'm not?
Is it fair that your government gives you a stipend if ure out of work and we have to hustle, and do all manner offs just to survive?
Is it fair that you get to impose what you want on your man because you couldn't get the Swedish men to do same?
Is it fair that your husband works and comes home to do chores while u a full house wife or a parttime wife sits home to tutor us on fairness?
Is it fair that you'll not allow ur hubby to hustle enough and send to his family dependent on him back home just because one you wants equity in house chores?
U absolutely know nothing of your husband and his people. If you did you wouldn't chat this way. Do you know how abject poverty looks like? How much have you sent to your mother-in-law? Have u ever sent her something? Wake up lady and let ur man be a lion.

Lol. Did I choose to be born in my country...? Nah, didn`t think so. Do you really mean that because something is not fair, you should not try to MAKE IT FAIR..?

People in my country pay TAXES sp the goverment can pay out not stipend, but social-help, so you can survive. Most of the time, it is barely enough for rent an food, and all other bills get pushed away. There is a reason not many people stay long on that one.

I have never had a swedish man in my life, and I have never imposed anything on my husband. I have talked about what I like to him, and so has he, and then we have come to an agreement together, like grown ups do. Exactly WHAT we have talked about, is impossible for you to know.

I work full time, he work part-time. So..guess that one falls out for you.
I have been paying more rent than him when we were both working full-time, so some the money could go for his mother, and for kids to go to school. He has been in Eu for 10 years without me, and has an arrangement on that already. Almost all the people in his family makes money on farming, or with real jobs, so they do not depend on him, it is mainly for school.

I have given money for my mother in law, yes. How much is none of your business, is it?

My husband is a lion, and I am his lioness. He shows me great respect, and I show him the same. He was living alone for more than 10 years with no wife, no mother, so he knows how to cook and clean, and I did not have to make him do anything in the house, he took the responsibility himself. That makes him less of a man in YOUR eyes.

sleekman: Interesting what I've missed. @JallowBAh Just wait till that hussy of yours sees a meaty babe in the right areas that is willing to be his beck and call then I suppose you'll come here preaching something else. There are Lions in Africa and from Africa but if you've succeeded in taming one then I'll see how long he'll stay a domesticated cat. For others that pretend to be 'domesticated cats' lets wait till some good forex enters their account. They'll be worse than rulers in Africa. All this boils down to money. A man melows when there isn't enough to act out. @Jallowbah and @bukatyne just remember I told u so.

He has never pretended to be anything he is not. Look at my response over here; I never made him do anything. He took it himself, I never have had to ask him to do anything, except teaching him to cut the crass with a machine outside. Everything else in the house, all the sharing of chores, have come naturally.

sleekman:

I know the likes of Jallowbah. Seen a lot of ur type in Sweden and across Europe. They want that raw African that they can forcefully mould to what they want. If you'll take my advice madam. Enjoy ur man. Let him be himself. You restrict in the name of you wanting to be happy, then madam unhappiness beckons at ur door. To be forewarned is to be forearmed

Trust me; If I did not let my husband be himself, he would have left a long, long time ago. I have not molded him into anything in my life. The only thing I have put my foot down on, is his temper, and he did the same with me. Chores? Nope, no need to mold him there, he did everything by choice.

Lucky me, I guess

JallowBah:

Lol. Did I choose to be born in my country...? Nah, didn`t think so. Do you really mean that because something is not fair, you should not try to MAKE IT FAIR..?

People in my country pay TAXES sp the goverment can pay out not stipend, but social-help, so you can survive. Most of the time, it is barely enough for rent an food, and all other bills get pushed away. There is a reason not many people stay long on that one.

I have never had a swedish man in my life, and I have never imposed anything on my husband. I have talked about what I like to him, and so has he, and then we have come to an agreement together, like grown ups do. Exactly WHAT we have talked about, is impossible for you to know.

I work full time, he work part-time. So..guess that one falls out for you.
I have been paying more rent than him when we were both working full-time, so some the money could go for his mother, and for kids to go to school. He has been in Eu for 10 years without me, and has an arrangement on that already. Almost all the people in his family makes money on farming, or with real jobs, so they do not depend on him, it is mainly for school.

I have given money for my mother in law, yes. How much is none of your business, is it?

My husband is a lion, and I am his lioness. He shows me great respect, and I show him the same. He was living alone for more than 10 years with no wife, no mother, so he knows how to cook and clean, and I did not have to make him do anything in the house, he took the responsibility himself. That makes him less of a man in YOUR eyes.

So you see why you shouldn't bring fairness into this equation but rather carrying out your responsibilities. Since ur hussy works parttime is it then fair to say that ur hussy is a roaring domesticated cat and not yet a lion? Just wondering if ur husband has a good full time job and he'll want to be bossed around? I noticed u brought out the softer side of you in ur last post. Would it then be fair to say ure appreciating ur husband now because I can surely tell you that if some ladies reading your post set eyes on your man then na wahala O! I guess uve come around to our point that you allow a man be a man. No taming going on? I wonder what the agreement is all about? Are u misfiring or firing 180degrees with 2guns madam?

sleekman:

So you see why you shouldn't bring fairness into this equation but rather carrying out your responsibilities. Since ur hussy works parttime is it then fair to say that ur hussy is a roaring domesticated cat and not yet a lion? Just wondering if ur husband has a good full time job and he'll want to be bossed around? I noticed u brought out the softer side of you in ur last post. Would it then be fair to say ure appreciating ur husband now because I can surely tell you that if some ladies reading your post set eyes on your man then na wahala O! I guess uve come around to our point that you allow a man be a man. No taming going on? I wonder what the agreement is all about? Are u misfiring or firing 180degrees with 2guns madam?

I have not changed anything, it is you and the other dude who just assumed I -made- my husband to the chores.
I could never marry a man that wanted me to do everything in the house, even when both of us are working. He has clearly said he could never marry a woman who expected him to pay everything.

My husband is a lion. Him not working fulltime does not make him any less of a man.
I have been appreciating him all along, it is not my fault you boys make up stories and think to yourself that because he do chores, "SHE MUST HAVE MADE HIM DO IT!".

The agreement for us is that when we work full-time, we take apx half/Half each. He has responsibility for some parts of the house, I have for others.
If one of us cook, the other take the dishes.
Most of the time, it is me taking the clothes, floor all around, cleaning the fridge when needed, windows etc.
Most of the time, he takes the bathroom-cleaning.
For us, this agreement works. For others, probably not.

jidegirl12: Is washing underwear the big issue here now? Cos I can't go back all the way to page 1 to find out , @jallowbah , our men don't wash underwear, it translates a bad omen to our society, I sure will throway that laundry basket if I see my brothers doing that.
you see why I said your arguing with these guys is baseless, we have different culture which you don't seem to agree, I'm not saying you shouldn't be part of it but thinking it works here is a no no.
And@ Michky, lol at 'stop polluting your girls' .. your 'girls' with no proper or no home training, your girls that shouts equality yet wants men to feed them,clothe them and still give them pocket money even tho they make minimum wages, girls that wants to sit and deligate chores to their men... need I say more?
Abegi, stop blaming @jallow for your problems, a lady that went all her way to Africa to support her man with a toddler, your 'girls' will probably complain of Mosquitos and rather wait till he comes back even tho they were born with flying Mosquitos in their mouth in their village.
I pray everyday for God to cast away some of them here from my families dwellings cos what they say sometimes shock me!

You seem to understand my stand point. Divorce is definitely going to be inexistent in your to-be marriage. But from the stubborn reactions of the self-acclaimed whitey and the other dumb one; its as if i've been speaking plutonian since. I dont get them atall. Note: Bukatyne, the dumb there isnt an insult. It is a fact. So, its best you dont take offence.

JallowBah:

No, it can not be put to rest, of the simple fact that your mind is so narrow, that you are not able to see that people live different from you, and are HAPPY about that.

And Cameroon, I do not always play the race-card, don`t even try. What happens in here is that people start saying "you are not even african, don`t come here with any talk". It is a public forum, I can tlak however I feel like, the only difference is that I still have some respect for people in my words here.

Bah.

It is you that have a respect problem here. Let me explain better. Niki minaj (a popular American musician) was almost jailed for hugging a man publicly in Saudi Arabia. Why? She didnt respect the norms of the land. Same goes for you. Blabbing respect and bla bla bla; and yet YOU ARE NOT RESPECTING OUR DIGNITY AS AFRICAN MEN in a majorly Africa-populated forum. Its very similar to hugging a man in an airport in today's Saudi Arabia, if you ask me. You're unrelentingly stubborn and self-centred. Please stop this rubbish asking men to wash your undies here pls!