WHY ARE YOU HERE? @PREMIUMTIMES..... LOAN THIS GUY OFF.... I LOVE YOUR OPINION.
NONETHELESS, YOU NEED TO MUCH MORE CAREFUL AS A MAN, THIS KIND OF WOMAN MAKES YOU LAZY, THEN HIJACK ACTIVITIES OFF YOUR HOOK, THUS, MAKING YOU IRRESPONSIBLE. BE WISE IN YOUR CHOICE. DONT BOTHER TO CHANGE HER, YOU BE THE CHANGE SHE NEEDS

GentleMimi: Intelligent woman all the way,no argument there.
I'll choose intelligence over gentility. Gentle peeps could be wickedly dangerous,you know? The intelligent woman knows how to handle situations as it deems fit. The man can go out and confidently leave his home in the intelligent woman's care.
The intelligent woman influences the children too. Makes them smart and active.
God forbid,but if the man passes away,the intelligence of the woman is needed for her children to make it in life with the few available resources.
The intelligent woman is not necessarily bossy or arrogant,just a lady who knows what she wants and then goes about achieving it in the easiest ways possible.
The man cannot be at his peak at all times in terms of mental capability. Sometimes,he needs a mentally strong woman to give him the required push.
Note: it is only strong men that take up the challange of an intelligent woman. Weak men want ''gentle'' pushovers,whom they can control like puppets on strings.

NONETHELESS, YOU NEED TO MUCH MORE CAREFUL AS A MAN, THIS KIND OF WOMAN MAKES YOU LAZY, THEN HIJACK ACTIVITIES OFF YOUR HOOK, THUS, MAKING YOU IRRESPONSIBLE. BE WISE IN YOUR CHOICE. DONT BOTHER TO CHANGE HER, YOU BE THE CHANGE SHE NEEDS

A healthy mix of the two

I won't pick one if you ask me cuz "what's normal for the spider is chaos for the fly"

What a man need from his wife is for her to be "submissive" being submissive does not make you dummie or inferior to your husband, intelligence and gentleness can lead on.

A gentle woman might just be pretending, an intelligent woman might turn your house upside down. 85% acclaimed intelligent women are the bossy type always competing with their husband.

Intelligent it is

Gentility here have largely been seen as timidity which in some cases may be right. Gentility when seen as Humility does not necessarily connote cowardice,like someone rightly said it even takes intelligence to be gentle.
Allow me to digress a little a certain coach who won the EPL last season has the nickname "THE GENTLE ONE"

Inteligent girls with love full all her face I pray for

There is no comparism between both,intelligence and gentle are one of the many attributes of a wife material, if you are intelligent and arrogant, it is safe to say that you are not a wife material. I don't expect a wife material not to posses an element of gentility.

I love intelligence,but I like women who know who they are and are true to their convictions.

Love is actually not enough to keep a home,the capacity to selflessly manage each other in affection and patience assures a progressive marriage. A woman who has these as I do or who is willing to build them will be my choice.

GentleMimi: Intelligent woman all the way,no argument there.
I'll choose intelligence over gentility. Gentle peeps could be wickedly dangerous,you know? The intelligent woman knows how to handle situations as it deems fit. The man can go out and confidently leave his home in the intelligent woman's care.
The intelligent woman influences the children too. Makes them smart and active.
God forbid,but if the man passes away,the intelligence of the woman is needed for her children to make it in life with the few available resources.
The intelligent woman is not necessarily bossy or arrogant,just a lady who knows what she wants and then goes about achieving it in the easiest ways possible.
The man cannot be at his peak at all times in terms of mental capability. Sometimes,he needs a mentally strong woman to give him the required push.
Note: it is only strong men that take up the challange of an intelligent woman. Weak men want ''gentle'' pushovers,whom they can control like puppets on strings.

Mimi, it seems you are more intelligent than Gentle. Change your username.

Intelligent or Gentle! I don't care, Just Fucking Respect Yourself!

[quote author=daryoor]we've all heard about how the whole temperament thing, and the conclusion that there is no perfect personality, that all has their pros and cons.

there are intelligent women that are aware of their potential, they are their opinion without fear, the are very active individuals. these women can make strategic decisions in the absence of their husbands. but the down side of this type is that the emasculate their husbands because the believe very well in their opinions and the can easily point out when the hubands leadership is far away from ideal, and this leads to a lot of instability.


on the othe hand there are very obedient women who just nuture you and your kids, no ambition or crave for control, they just want peace and stability, i know you can be intelligent and choose to be submissive but im refering to those ones that got you shocked when you heard they are graduates, the ones that actually cant contribute anything logical or thoughtful, the kind of wife that you cant discuss your problems with an be sure she cant ever give u a well thought out advise or suggestion, women like this have no interest in politics, culture or basic philosophy, she can only talk about fathiah balogun and p. square.

i know these two cases are extreme but which is better? [/quoti
It is always good you marry someone who has the same temperament as you do. If you are the quiet type, get someone who is quiet. If you are the talking type, get someone who likes talking as well. Otherwise, you get bored when you end up with the your opposite side of your temperament.

McWhillion: Intelligent girls.
Intelligent girls are most times gentle anyway.

You're right, because they aren't ready to prove anything.

Intelligence without gentleness could result to pride & arrogance

Obviously, most people here can't really differentiate between a gentle and a quiet person. A gentle person is not a wicked person, a quiet person might be.

For me, I prefer a gentle woman, one who has control over everything around her as a result of her gentle nature, not a forceful woman who has no control over her ways

And who says a gentle person is not an intelligent fellow...

koredey: .... Lolz u don't have to ask her if she responding to defend herself , d way she take talk am don answer that question.. SWEETLEMON no mind pple wey dey ask dat kinda question dey are just looking for a way to defending demselves for walking around with an ugly chick. No be me talk am sha..

Well exactly my type of girl, so if she's saying that to defend herself, it's nothing to be ashamed of.
sweetlemon should be happy she's gentle and intelligent and I think beautiful too.

If she's gentle she must be decorus, and if she's decorus she must be intelligent, however she shouldn't be a glum!.

Sweetlemon:

Exactly!

One would think a gentle girl cannot be intelligent. Gentleness in itself is a form of mature intelligence. Same way some unexposed people will ask "a beautiful dumb girl or an ugly intelligent girl" as if beautiful girls cannot be intelligent.

Mtcheeeeeeeeew

my kind!

dmcdad:
You are right, but to some degree it's caused by the guys involved.

Hw?
I dated an intelligent girl sometimes ago n she was alwys prooving her intelligence at very little issues.
D tin tire me oooo.

An Intelligent gal is worth 10000yards of wife material.....

A wife material should posses both qualities---Intelligent + Gentle...

mkoabiola:
Hw?
I dated an intelligent girl sometimes ago n she was alwys prooving her intelligence at very little issues.
D tin tire me oooo.

I get your point... But such people, you need to display your own intelligence especially in an area completely unknown to them. You need to wow them to some degree, and them go start to dey fear you. Lol.

Again, even with their intelligence, an average guy can still outsmart them even in arguments if the guy know how to.

Ladies, if u aren't intelligent i have no business with you, period.

Intelligence encompasses a lot of traits and gentle can easily fit into it. She knows when to be all smartie-pants and take control of situations. She also knows how to read into situations and mellow when necessary. Gentility is a tool for an intelligent woman to gently guide her partner into knowing what's up. It's easy for people to say 'gentle' but what they call gentle is what they term 'dull' in their heads. But anyway, I don't think any guy in his right mind would want to be with a bimbo just because she qualifies as an 'okay, dear' kind of wife/girlfriend.

[Some Nairaland topics make me want to stab somebody in the eye, such primitive opinions.]

A woman can be intelligent without being emasculating or disrespectful, and a woman can be gentle without being a doormat. Intelligence does not mean stubbornness, just as gentleness does not mean weakness.

Furthermore, a woman can be intelligent AND gentle. The two are not mutually exclusive.

QED.

McWhillion:
Well exactly my type of girl, so if she's saying that to defend herself, it's nothing to be ashamed of.
sweetlemon should be happy she's gentle and intelligent and I think beautiful too.

u think she's beautiful...!!! U are not even sure if she is.. Mouth sealed !!

I will go for intelligent girl like berem anytime.
Gentility is reciprocal and intelligent people respond appropriately.
Pretty face is only an additional bonus one can do without. ( unless of course she grotesque and hideous)

The topic should have been 'intelligent girl or dumb girl'. Is gentle the opposite of intelligent? Dumb op.

None of the above

jayseehe:
Nope, opposite attracts, so such marriage will break

@topic, the both are attributes of a wife material...
I prefer intelligence though, but a typical definition of a wife material, gentleness will come before intelligence

. Opposite attracts in marriage? Maybe in the past but I can tell you from my perspective, I can't cope with an out going woman cause am very reserved. That is my current dilemma. Got an intelligent outgoing girl and a dumb reserved girl both of which I can't cope with cause am intelligent but reserved.

koredey: u think she's beautiful...!!! U are not even sure if she is.. Mouth sealed !!

I haven't seen her pic, so I'm just been modest.

Most guys will open their mouths to say they want an intellligently smart girl but deep down within them they want a gently dumb girl so they will be able to push and order her around. The "African" in most of our men will make them prefer the gentle girl as a wife material.