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Stats: 3,109,094 members, 7,672,363 topics. Date: Sunday, 10 December 2023 at 02:56 PM
|Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Karleb(m): 12:27pm On Apr 22, 2020|
I never said introversion is a disease.
In fact, if introversion should be a disease then extroversion should also be a disease.
If you read the post you quoted, you'll notice I was referring to social awareness. Yes! That's where Introverts need help.
I mean; how do you explain the fact that someone find it tiring communicating with his wife or husband?
Extrovert, introverts, ambiverts or whatever label there is, we all face more or less the same challenges.
|Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Karleb(m): 12:43pm On Apr 22, 2020|
This is exactly what I am saying!
How do you expect people to relate with you when you don't relate with them?
More often than not people will relate with others that are ready to reciprocate the gesture, even you.
What could have really saved you then would have been asking your brother how he does it, I'm very sure he would have happily taught you what no Introvert can teach you because he had the real experience not some copy paste solutions.
Now you don't even relate with your own relatives. Image!
This is why I strongly suggest this thread should be opened up to all especially extroverts because of people like you, people who have real life problem.
Please note that the problem I'm talking about is low Social Awareness.
|Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Juell(m): 12:52pm On Apr 22, 2020|
Karleb:Nah, it doesn't work that way. My parents siblings knew I'm quite outside cos people don't understand me, but at home I'm very loud cos they know me and accepted me for who I am. But those outside will just assume he's quite and will not even make an attempt to reach out first. Funny enough some of them later see me with those I'm comfortable with and will shocked and be like "so u can talk like this". In summary what I'm saying don't make an introvert feel like him being an introvert is socially wrong, cos if you do dat he'll withdraw further back into his shell. For me no one helped me to become outspoken or out going and I didn't beat myself up cos I wanted to be out going. And I've met a lot of introverts and still meeting them, all I do is study them and try to pick their interests b4 you know it we're flowing like we've known for ages.
|Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Xzbit91: 3:13pm On Apr 22, 2020|
That's the mistake you're making Karleb. No one can teach you what comes naturally to them, especially when it's instinctive and you didn't have to learn.
If a rat scurries in front of a dog, the natural instinct of the dog will be to run but if it scurries in front of a cat, the cats instinct will be to attack.
It's not like the introvert doesn't know how to socialise, he/she can do that, even better under certain circumstances.
There are certain emotions, fears and drawbacks that prevent introverts from being outgoing and making themselves vulnerable to strangers. Only someone who has undergone and overcome same challenges can provide a practical solution for those who face same challenges.
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|Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Karleb(m): 3:20pm On Apr 22, 2020|
You're comparing Cat and Dog I'm comparing human and human.
|Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Juell(m): 4:10pm On Apr 22, 2020|
Karleb:On a final note, do you know why psychologist are mostly or all introverts?
Let me help you, it's cos introverts are better at listening than extroverts. So who can help someone with socializing issues or dysfunctions? Someone who'll listen and let the person speak out his mind (without being judged) and who'll understand..... So an extrovert can't help an introvert. As an extrovert if you succeed to drag ur introvert friend to a party for example, at a point when you hook up with ur other extrovert friends u'll forget ur introvert friend cos u're catching fun with ur other extrovert friends.
|Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Xzbit91: 7:01pm On Apr 22, 2020|
I used that caparison for lack of a better analogy, but that's besides the point. Human beings are not a monolith.
|Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Juell(m): 8:24pm On Apr 22, 2020|
|Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Xzbit91: 9:24pm On Apr 22, 2020|
I wouldn't go as far as to say they don't think deep.
It's just one of the downsides to being a part of the majority and conventional social norms. You become blind and indifferent to the struggles, experiences and realities of the minority.
|Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Hakeem12(m): 10:17am On Apr 23, 2020|
Juell:wouldn't say they don't think deep, maybe just not all the time or over think like introverts do. For instance, where I work, I watch a group of extroverts brainstorm all the time. I roll my eyes knowing at the end of the meeting, I'd make a suggestion, explain it and the solution is chosen. One other thing that annoys me about them is wanting to get together for meetings for even the little things without considering people who may not be that social.
|Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Juell(m): 10:29am On Apr 23, 2020|
Hakeem12:U're right, they're mostly not patient enough to listen.
|Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Usorohtheman(m): 4:41am On Apr 24, 2020|
I believe this lockdown is actually favouring the introverts.
|Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by DonOms(m): 10:44am On Apr 24, 2020|
I wouldn't put it in those exact words because introverts too do have lives - work, friends, religious groups, social circles in some form and what have you. And we can't really do all that in the proper way now, can we?
Having said that, yes, Introverts will thrive and perform better during these period. And I dare say that the extroverts have a lot to learn from us at this time because we're all in the Introvert's 'comfortable situation.'
An extroverted colleague of mine was complaining to me how he is going insane being inside his house. I had to give him helpful tips on "how to not lose your mind during lockdown."
I couldn't help but mention you having read all your comments here. While your intentions appear righteous, you're getting the whole idea of this thread wrong. Like I said above, Introverts have a lot to teach extroverts during this time. So it would make sense to also say that when things are normal, extroverts can teach introverts a lot too, right? Not exactly sir (I'm assuming you're a man).
The world we live in today is "made" for extroverts and introverts have been 'struggling to find their place' in a noisy world. So why do you think we need extroverts to guide us? It's not a case of finding yourself immigrate to France and getting the locals to teach you French (That's your take), It's a case of being disposed to low noise and your new neighbour blares his woofer to your ears. You don't go to your neighbour to teach you how to adapt to loud music, that neighbour didn't have to adapt at any point, he was born to listen to loud music. You find a fellow introvert who had adapted and learn from him.
So, while you may mean well, this thread is not for what you think. But it's good to have you come around and learn a thing or two on how to cope with lockdown. *winks.*
|Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Hakeem12(m): 12:33pm On Apr 24, 2020|
Juell:Another problem is communication range. Imagine a relationship where the wife is an introvert, the husband an extrovert. The husband in question considers his wife to have no social skills because he can't seem to get in sync with her, or simply can't get any contact on her. They simply live in different worlds. it's not about how she talked, but what she talked about.
The topics she's interested in are either boring to him or way beyond his understanding. To the woman in question, she'll probably think she's married to a dullard and the man thinks his wife is condescending.
There is a proverb that says "Even a stupid man can pass as wise, as long as he keeps his mouth shut." Unfortunately for introverts like us, it also works the other way - "A wise person can pass as mediocre as long as he keeps his cakehole shut."
It is this loneliness which sucks, and the usual anti-intellectualism and the hostility of our present day society. Humans are, after all herd animals, and we thrive best in herds - when we are in company with other humans.
No man is an island, but we introverts are peninsulae.
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|Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by babyfaceafrica: 10:05pm On Apr 24, 2020|
So why do you think we need extroverts to guide us?
Extroverts guide who?.. How can noisemakers guide people?.. Individuals who are lousy, not patient, and noisy.. Guide introverts?... Only an introvert or probably an ambivert knows how to guide an introvert.. You can't teach what you don't know
|Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by DonOms(m): 5:46am On Apr 25, 2020|
It's either you didn't read my post or I don't understand you. The very idea of my post is that extroverts CANNOT teach introverts how to socialize in an extrovert-dominated world where everyone is expected to be an extrovert.
|Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by U1(m): 2:29pm On Apr 26, 2020|
I can relate with the bold, bro. The second sentence captures what I was trying to state in a post here some time ago. Some of us can seem like extroverts when in the right company.
I could remember when I was in secondary school many years ago. Most of my classmates initially thought I didn't like relating with people, except a few that used to sit close to me. Two to three years later, they were somewhat shocked about the talkative I had become. The same thing happened during my university days.
It's not even really about people reaching out first in all cases. There are times you'd try to relate and you would probably get a cold response, if any. That right there can send an introvert back into their shell!
|Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by CsRockefeller(m): 3:17pm On Apr 26, 2020|
After over 25 years, I wish I wasnt an introvert.
Men!!....... I'm tired and exhausted. Even when I try to go out of my way to make friends or meet people it never ends well.
Dont wish to be one ever again.
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|Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by jbridges(f): 4:06pm On Apr 26, 2020|
Same here. I will start searching the universe for what more to say �. It can be very annoying, what can a daughter of man do.
|Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by jbridges(f): 4:12pm On Apr 26, 2020|
This is true. I hardly talk but when I do, people laugh. My sense of humor is outta this world. Introverts see the good in people and are always very supportive.
|Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Juell(m): 4:39pm On Apr 26, 2020|
U1:Exactly at the bolded, once we get such treatment just forget it
|Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Juell(m): 4:40pm On Apr 26, 2020|
U1:Exactly once given a cold treatment that's it
|Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Juell(m): 4:46pm On Apr 26, 2020|
CsRockefeller:U were born that way, no one chose to be an introvert/extrovert. It's all about working on ur weaknesses and developing more of strength. Like for, I'd rather have the right company around me than be all alone, I hardly enjoy my own company. Relating with people has become easy for me.
|Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by cochtrane(m): 3:11am On Apr 28, 2020|
CsRockefeller:All of this self-pity is unwarranted. You need to start thinking of your qualities more from a strong or work-in-progress standpoint than from a weak one. No one is immune to being tired or exhausted or lacking energy. Studies have shown repeatedly that that has little to do with your personality type than it does with your self-motivation, inner drive or determination to succeed. To think that not being introvert (or even extrovert) is the way out is a highly erroneous route to take. Maybe if you are not human, then that's your way out; but I'm digressing.
There is a lot out there in the world to face regardless of one's personality type. Everyone handles it differently. Those who are talkative talk to calm their nerves, even when they feel anxious. Those who aren't talkative on the other hand, stay quiet to calm their nerves. Different people, different reactions to the stimulus called environment. Learn to handle your own reaction well and you shall thrive.
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|Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Karleb(m): 11:52pm On Apr 28, 2020|
A lot of people became Introverts/extroverts because of their experience and environment.
|Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Karleb(m): 11:53pm On Apr 28, 2020|
Is it by force to be what you don't want to be?
Is introversion a cult group?
|Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Karleb(m): 12:01am On Apr 29, 2020|
Let me group Introverts into two groups:
Group 1: These ones have sold their soul to the eternal goddess of silence. They'll rather not talk even if talking was necessary. These are the types that can stay indoor for a year if they have the necessary amenities.
Group 2: These ones like quiet but not always, they secretly wish to be like their talkative friends. Some of them were even extroverts as a kid but only became introvert during adolescent.
They enjoy their me time quite well but they'll often come out of their shell from time to time to catch with the latest in their neighborhood.
I have no business with group 1 but I'm mostly concerned about the second group. They are the reason why I'm doing what I'm doing here.
|Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Introvertediary(f): 4:14am On Apr 29, 2020|
There are many speculations about introverts and people tend to misinterpret the essence and beauty of it.
It should be embraced, not ridiculed, which is why www.diaryofanintrovertng.com is dedicated to all the introverts out there, struggling to find their place in a world that won't stop talking.
You may want to start with this superb article on Reasons Why Everyone Is Introverted - https://diaryofanintrovertng.com/2019/09/13/everyone-is-introverted/
While you're at it, there are other amazing articles on lifestyle, relationships, people and society, certain to have you glued to your mobile devices.
|Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Liliantalks: 7:19am On Apr 29, 2020|
J0nyb0y:thats me ,,, I forget people a lot ,, I see people n hv to pretend I remember them when I actually don’t , it’s annoying when u tell people to explain how u all met . I use to hv a problem expressing myself but that changed after plenty advice from people
|Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Liliantalks: 7:20am On Apr 29, 2020|
Karleb:I fall in the second category
|Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Sard(m): 7:22am On Apr 29, 2020|
Don't you think you are trying too hard on this thread?
You continue saying all the negative things about introverts and still think anyone will be willing to listen to you. Do you think that will ever work?
Why don't you just let people be?
On the thread, we've highlighted various things people can do to improve their social skills. Anyone that wants them will pick the needed information.
You don't have to continue saying vile words about introverts. Continue being an extrovert and let others be. No one needs your pity.
|Re: Introverts Lounge (Extroverts Pls Keep Off !!) by Liliantalks: 7:27am On Apr 29, 2020|
Personally I am an out spoken person , but not just in public , I love my house more than anything on earth , my bed is just the love of my life , I love music and enjoy my phone , why ? Because I am only free on the internet compared to real life . I hate talking to strangers but I just hv to when they talk to me,, I don’t hv a problem making friends, why ? Cause people like making friends with me ,, I go out ones in a while after my friends abuse the hell out of me . I wish to be an extrovert sometimes , those peeps r enjoying life , why? Cause when I go out I do enjoy myself also ,,, but there is this comfort I feel when I am home , alone!! I don’t even want my mum around. I come around people when I want to cm around people ,, don’t cm to me when I am in my room alone , I hate it .
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