learning by making good decision is better than through experience because learning through experience may be costly and may not have remedy. make good decision now as it will favour you in the long run. you made it clear you are ready for marriage but your bfriend is not.
my advice is that you should accept ALL your suitors. i mean all of them.play a mature game among them and within short period you should be able to identify one who posses 70 percent of what you need in a man. grab him and stick with him.


mistake many ladies made is by not given many men a space in their heart. a guy (playboy) catch them at young and believe that is the love of their life.

Obalende:


You do not need to have funds.I tell you nigerians need a big paradigm shift. If you want to get married, just fukin get married! You do not need a big wedding. You can just do court. who says you must do a 3 million naira wedding?

I know a man 27 and his wife 23, the man is $12,000 in debt. Yet they are happily married.

nigerians need to snap out of this $$$ mentality, seems I will marry white.

Go and marry red if u wish
Nonsense

romkey:
learning by making good decision is better than through experience because learning through experience may be costly and may not have remedy. make good decision now as it will favour you in the long run. you made it clear you are ready for marriage but your bfriend is not.
my advice is that you should accept ALL your suitors. i mean all of them.play a mature game among them and within short period you should be able to identify one who posses 70 percent of what you need in a man. grab him and stick with him.


mistake many ladies made is by not given many men a space in their heart. a guy (playboy) catch them at young and believe that is the love of their life.

you mean she should say yes to all of them , and then dumps them after sometime .... how would you feel getting dumped after spending your money and time ,been thru that shiiit and a reason I dont blame men who dont respect ladies . its a selfish motive for her to decieve people , then the one that has 70 percent of the desired need can as well decieve her also to see if she got upto 90 percent of his needs.please advice properly.

OP i think u should marry all of them. Get your distant uncles and aunties to pretend like your parents. Collect bride price and chop am wella

^^^^ hahahaha. Silly you

Vesuvius:
Hmmmm........this ur advice sha. Truth be told, men know what they want and are easy to make up their mind but you saying that 3 months is very much enough to come to a conclusion is somewhat an overkill. I know it's wrong to string a good sister along but has it ever occurred to you that some good guys can also be very picky when it comes to picking a partner? You make it seem like it's only women that have all the rights or get played. My dear some guys also have tales. E be like say your guy is a yes man (no offence).

That your husband married you not minding that you are a bad cook is not a guarantee that it will work for others. If anything, the real worthy guys make sure the package's exterior is in tandem with the content before they say I do. I grade guys who see a lady immediately and start talking about marriage as foolish and tasteless. What happened to taking time to know someone better. What if the babe is pretending like most women do when they sense you are coming for marriage? A MAN HAS EQUAL RIGHTS TO ENTERTAIN DOUBTS UNLESS HE IS OPEN TO DIVORCE IN THE FUTURE!. On the other hand, I believe 6 months to 12 months is enough for any serious dude to really make his decision. Some of the advices being bandied about here are clearly from newlyweds. When your marriage has crossed at least 5 years and above, your advice may start being an authority, as for now lets take them as they come and move on. Many of you women don't know how hard it is for a man to plan and execute a wedding amidst it's attendant challenges.
BTW: I feel like you call the shots in the marriage, hope am wrong?

LOL....guy chop knuckle joor. The thing be say the average girl always overly thinks about her own good before yours. That's why i like guys who know how to guard their heart too. So many advice here. The Op better be wise to know which to choose o. Goodluck to her.

sweetheart,
go on with your life. if you have suitors and your beau is still not ready please move on. check out your suitors and kindly move on with the one you know you can live with.

giving up too much for one man would only earn you hurt. love grows and love dies.
take your decisions prayerfully.

Break off quietly and open your eyes well for the coming guys, settle with the genuine one.make use of every opportunity to move to next level of your life.and if you have a close relationship with Jesus then prayer will settle it for you.wish you well

sage2:


Change that your "kpalasa" phone and wait for three days and see if he proposes to you. If it doesn't happen, give him another two days seven hours and 3 minutes, 12 seconds. You may want to wear only color purple during this period. If he still fail to do the needful, pm me asap for the next line of action.

This piece of advice has worked for girls in the Bahamas, Cayman Island, and a whooping 41 states in the USA.

It is still being tested in 6 other states. It failed to work in South Carolina and New Jersey.

It is banned in the whole of China and some parts of Japan.

It is awaiting regulatory approval in the UK.

lol

EfemenaXY:


True and that mindset really needs to change.

The pressure to get married is ridiculous. So if a lady who knows what she wants doesn't meet the right man before her thirties, then what next? She gets told to "lower her standards and expectations".

No wonder many men out there feel they do women a big favour by putting a ring on their fingers.

before nko,..lol

Op is scared she will never get to Love anyone else than the way she loves this Guy.

Mind you he may just be waiting for one year more to be ready for marriage and you may just rush to marry the wrong dude.

Op relationships take time and commitment to build if you sense your currently guy have all it takes to start a comfortable family why not encourage him to take the bold step. As i sense you both are already used to each other.

Meanwhile Make sure you marry your friend and someone you love and feel at peace with.

It is a life Time Commitment.

There is no blanket solution to this, because the reasons why men delay are many. Some are plausible reasons, some are delinquent reasons.

Have you tried to find out why your man is delaying? That is the key to your whole solution.

Try to find out, not with the aim of interrogation or responding with an immediate solution for him, but with the aim of actually helping him open up on the root cause of his hesitation, worry or even fear.
If you TRUELY love this guy, then it's worth it to see if his reason is something you can understand, empathize and even be supportive on.

If his reasons are reasonable, then you should begin now to practice your future wifely task of understanding and SUPPORTING your man.
This is actually the kind of vibe that make men accelerate on marriage.

romkey:
learning by making good decision is better than through experience because learning through experience may be costly and may not have remedy. make good decision now as it will favour you in the long run. you made it clear you are ready for marriage but your bfriend is not.
my advice is that you should accept ALL your suitors. i mean all of them.play a mature game among them and within short period you should be able to identify one who posses 70 percent of what you need in a man. grab him and stick with him.


mistake many ladies made is by not given many men a space in their heart. a guy (playboy) catch them at young and believe that is the love of their life.

It is advice like this that puts ALL women in trouble.
If you try this break dance, ALL the 5 suitors will find out and downgrade you from marriage material to play-play material (unless they are low-IQ, laggards). You think that when a man is ready to MARRY, he doesn't check out his market?

OP if you try it: you will still come here to post your experience.
Before I married 6 years ago, I encountered plenty of this "mature game" types wey believe say dem sharp pass their degree.
I actually had secret meetings and made plans with some of the other suitors (Siddon there, una wey get sense pass). Believe me, you don't want to risk being in the middle of that.

Infact at least 3 of those girls that I still hear about never marry reach today.

FavourGee:


Thanks but I tried making him give me definite answer, he began to talk as if I'm lying and pressurizing him to get married to me.

Believe me on this, he does love u deeply. Talking from experience.

smithereen:


It is advice like this that puts ALL women in trouble.
If you try this break dance, ALL the 5 suitors will find out and downgrade you from marriage material to play-play material (unless they are low-IQ, laggards). You think that when a man is ready to MARRY, he doesn't check out his market?

OP if you try it: you will still come here to post your experience.
Before I married 6 years ago, I encountered plenty of this "mature game" types wey believe say dem sharp pass their degree.
I actually had secret meetings and made plans with some of the other suitors (Siddon there, una wey get sense pass). Believe me, you don't want to risk being in the middle of that.

Infact at least 3 of those girls that I still hear about never marry reach today.

Tell them. One of my female friends some 9 years back tried that dance. You know those type of girls that always believe all men are the same, and that they have men all figured out. Her main suitor was recently transferred to a new branch of the bank he used to work then, in another state. The young lady true to that typical "penny wise pound foolish" age long wisdom, engaged in trying out other guys including yours sincerely. . Gradually I withdrew, few months later the main guy was pushed to the wall, put through a lot of paces by the girl. Bank job has its own stress, and since she wasn't being understanding, he freed himself from her troubles. The other 4 guys somehow got wind of her multiple dates and voila, all man to himself. Lol...

Met her two months back at my workplace and she was hiding herself having seen me earlier. I went out to greet her and to render her assistance cos she was pregnant. The biatch was acting all up and was like "what is that your name again sef?" (Na so, I decide say I no go help am again). I smiled, cut her short and started general discussions. Few minutes later, see one old man who came out to call her. I couldn't believe my eyes. I later found out she settled for him having been disappointed by her "6 back ups". Fine girl she was, but over sense dey worry her.

Some of those girls yapping earlier are just lucky children whose palm kernels were broken for them by certain benevolent spirits. The Op should heed their advice carefully.
.

Mondisweets:
OP i think u should marry all of them. Get your distant uncles and aunties to pretend like your parents. Collect bride price and chop am wella

the best advice

My dear,am facin the same problem,
But do u know ladies problem,we dt get wot we love,but my prayer is LET GOD WILL BE DONE,because marriage is life time commitmt and we need God intevention.

aisha2:


Disclaimer oh, I didn't advice that you should just jump.in and marry one of your suitors oh just because you want to marry. Take your time know what you want and if any of these suitors have those qualities.
Marriage is not tinini tanana

Lol! Fear fear. I think she's doing the right thing. A dude who wants to settle with u will nt act like her bf.... Btw, nice job here.

FavourGee:
Hello everyone!

I have been dating this guy for a year now, both of us have jobs so I don't ask him for any financial assistance.
for sometime now I have been getting suitors, they are five in number now asking for my hand in marriage but I keep turning them down because I am hoping on my present relationship though the stuborn ones are still disturbing me with marriage proposals.

I decided to let my boyfriend know about them, the response I got from him wasn't satisfactory. From my own understanding he's not ready to settle down any time soon neither did he tell me to wait for him nor propose to me.

I am confused right now, I don't know if I should wait
for him till when he's ready but my fear is what if he never propose. I really love him and I know he loves me too.

Matured advice please.

"Please don't mind my typing skills I am typing through one kpalasa phone"

It is only your unguarded thoughts that will harm you ....NL,is a land you will always be getting praise and blame.Do not allow either affect the poise of the mind. Holy Molly !!! Nigerians, girls are desperate for marriage ....You think those suitors will make a good husband? Hahaha....let us hope you won't come back crying wolf .

Emaprince:
I even wanted to say the same thing but thank GOD I never voted her..

I no fit laugh .....

1one:


Lol.


That cocoa bournvita, is it that one with a purple sachet?... If it is, then yeah.. truly it's wow!!!

By the way, I just used the beverage situation as an analogy to buttress my point.


But Milo rocks sha

Who still drinks ovaltine

My point exactly. Its possible to be wooed by the packaging and brand, Ovaltine represents, but to be turned off after trying it. In that case, wont switching to another beverage be the logical thing to do? There are no absolutes in the world of dating and romance; you cannot isolate an action and pronounce judgement without considering the circumstances surrounding it, most of which are extenuating.

I was once in a relatnshp where I was deeply unhappy...other 'milos' and 'bournvitas' came arnd, but I found it impossible to double date. I later left my ovaltine, but milo and bournvita were no longer available. Na who come loose pass?

Now, *large smile* I can double date.....but Iv always chosen not to..

whitemosquito:
My point exactly. Its possible to be wooed by the packaging and brand, Ovaltine represents, but to be turned off after trying it. In that case, wont switching to another beverage be the logical thing to do? There are no absolutes in the world of dating and romance; you cannot isolate an action and pronounce judgement without considering the circumstances surrounding it, most of which are extenuating.

I was once in a relatnshp where I was deeply unhappy...other 'milos' and 'bournvitas' came arnd, but I found it impossible to double date. I later left my ovaltine, but milo and bournvita were no longer available. Na who come loose pass?

Now, *large smile* I can double date.....but Iv always chosen not to..

Ofcourse, if you're in a relationship that's less than satisfying, ohh sure, by all means possible, leave, my gripe is with the habit of [some] ladies who accommodate the hunger for other beverages when the milo they have is still very very tasty, all under the guise of not wanting to put all " your beverages in one shelf".... Behaviors like that kill any form of commitment and purpose...Double dating, triple dating or even in a faint sense, in the case of the OP-penta dating has become the tenet for [some] ladies and quite frankly that's unfortunate.


Seeing as you've said double dating is not your thing - I give you major props for that. I hope you can maintain that stand till wedding bells.

Babe,wake up from your slumber. Your guy never told you,your relationship will lead to marriage and you still with him.
You may ask him,if you felt he isnt serious enough,just walk.

my dear go marry one of the suitors if only u are telling us the truth........... ......