I have seen this post before

Abi you no want marry ? in African society there are certain expectations, to be a man you must show yourself as a man. Being a man has nothing to do with biological age but your actions.

is alright....

Henrypraise:
Once u start workin, even ur enemy wants u to get married.

In my formal office, I was given a 30days in 1 week off, wen I tried to protest, I was told m not married n it shud remain like dat. Whereas d married once stay in d office doin almost notin.

Former

The OP don vex

Op , thats nigeria and nigerians for you but i agree with you people see marriage esp girls as their highest position in life that they get frustrated when a man is not forthcoming.

Funny but it's a serious issue.

Omo he b like sey na tru oh am d only single guy for my office and if u see aw everybody look down on me although am d youngest sha, if anybody late to office or no come that is not big deal but if na me they will be like sey u get wife for house ni or afterall u are not married wetin dey delay u, even if anybody wants to borrow money na still me cause them believe i neva marry and nothing wey i dey use money for..i tire for them oh

Op go and marry.

Nobody has the right to live their lives in this country, whether good or bad they are always there to talk. The best Is just to ignore.

StarboyMichael:
My friend wrote this and I want to share.

Let me first declare that this post was inspired by a Facebook post by a friend. She narrated that she heard a pastor telling the married women in his congregation not to be friends with single women...the reason for his advice is that he believes they will be misled by their unmarried/single friends.

Well I am not ready to join issue with this pastor, but I will like to use this opportunity to join issue with Nigerian society as a whole. Personally, I have always believed that Nigerians have a very misguided, perverted and warped idea of a relationship or marriage.
I said so because I am talking from experience. An average Nigerian believes that once a man or woman is working, the next thing is for him or her to get married. Everywhere you go, you are bombarded with the questions of "when are you getting married?", "do you know time is going?", "what are you waiting for?", etc. In fact, the pressure is so much that if you are not a strong person, you will start thinking that you have a problem.

Now let everyone listen to me, if you are married, congratulations and I wish you well. But it is an invasion of privacy to be asking people when they are getting married. And it is wrong of you to disrespect people because they are not married. Some people even think single or unmarried people are irresponsible or lose. If you are a man, some people will also insinuate that may be you are impotent. ‪#‎smile‬. I have seen situations where some married people believe you should accord them special respect because they are married and you are not.

Let me continue by saying that I am not married and I don't need anybody's advice on why I am not yet married. I personally will not tolerate disrespect from anyone because I am not married. Neither will I accord anyone special respect because he or she is married. I will only respect you if you deserve my respect, whether you are married or single is immaterial to me.

Finally, let it be clear that single or unmarried status is not a disease that needs to be cured. And to all the single and unmarried people out there, your destiny is in your own hands. Whether you allow the society to make you feel inadequate or not, depends on you. Always remember that there is nothing wrong with you. Also, know that everybody cannot get married at the same time. In fact, I don't have problem with anyone who doesn't want to get married at all.

Thank you and share your thoughts.

thank you!! Thank you very much. Nothing to add. Mind you, those choking others with their marital status re more often than none miserable in their marriage.of course they can't leave because of "society" (whatever that means). Domestic violence is on the all time rise, spousal killing is now a normal thing yet they will rather die with the tag "married" than living to fulfill purpose! Marriage is good, marriage is sweet. It is also worth waiting for. If done wrongly, that person of all men is the most miserable. Some can't afford that.

Me thinks you protest too much.

Life is all about perspective.

Me thinks you did not get the pastor's message bro.

An analogy for you.....

"Two prisoners looked out of the prison bars. One saw mud, the other saw stars."

Let's always do our best to pick out the positives in any situation.

Let me help the Pastor. You see my brother, IRON SHARPENETH IRON.

Move with like-minded people. Capice?

StarboyMichael:
My friend wrote this and I want to share.

Let me first declare that this post was inspired by a Facebook post by a friend. She narrated that she heard a pastor telling the married women in his congregation not to be friends with single women...the reason for his advice is that he believes they will be misled by their unmarried/single friends.

Well I am not ready to join issue with this pastor, but I will like to use this opportunity to join issue with Nigerian society as a whole. Personally, I have always believed that Nigerians have a very misguided, perverted and warped idea of a relationship or marriage.
I said so because I am talking from experience. An average Nigerian believes that once a man or woman is working, the next thing is for him or her to get married. Everywhere you go, you are bombarded with the questions of "when are you getting married?", "do you know time is going?", "what are you waiting for?", etc. In fact, the pressure is so much that if you are not a strong person, you will start thinking that you have a problem.

Now let everyone listen to me, if you are married, congratulations and I wish you well. But it is an invasion of privacy to be asking people when they are getting married. And it is wrong of you to disrespect people because they are not married. Some people even think single or unmarried people are irresponsible or lose. If you are a man, some people will also insinuate that may be you are impotent. ‪#‎smile‬. I have seen situations where some married people believe you should accord them special respect because they are married and you are not.

Let me continue by saying that I am not married and I don't need anybody's advice on why I am not yet married. I personally will not tolerate disrespect from anyone because I am not married. Neither will I accord anyone special respect because he or she is married. I will only respect you if you deserve my respect, whether you are married or single is immaterial to me.

Finally, let it be clear that single or unmarried status is not a disease that needs to be cured. And to all the single and unmarried people out there, your destiny is in your own hands. Whether you allow the society to make you feel inadequate or not, depends on you. Always remember that there is nothing wrong with you. Also, know that everybody cannot get married at the same time. In fact, I don't have problem with anyone who doesn't want to get married at all.

Thank you and share your thoughts.

Ours isn't a normal society. Nigerians and their needless busybody in other people's matters is so annoying.

Whether or not we want to admit it, getting married isn't the most important thing in life.

Nigeria is a weird society and if you insist on being great, then you risk being misunderstood.

I'm so busy with my life that I hardly have enough time to bother myself with when an adult will get married.

It's even worse with the single ladies. Nigerian society has already stereotyped them as irresponsible.

Married people are some of the most miserable folks on the earth.

Just get on with your life. Let the lousy folks do their talking.

noted!

If the Op were married, he won't type all that sh!t up there. Marriage is important at least, to our culture here.

StarboyMichael:
My friend wrote this and I want to share.

Let me first declare that this post was inspired by a Facebook post by a friend. She narrated that she heard a pastor telling the married women in his congregation not to be friends with single women...the reason for his advice is that he believes they will be misled by their unmarried/single friends.

Well I am not ready to join issue with this pastor, but I will like to use this opportunity to join issue with Nigerian society as a whole. Personally, I have always believed that Nigerians have a very misguided, perverted and warped idea of a relationship or marriage.
I said so because I am talking from experience. An average Nigerian believes that once a man or woman is working, the next thing is for him or her to get married. Everywhere you go, you are bombarded with the questions of "when are you getting married?", "do you know time is going?", "what are you waiting for?", etc. In fact, the pressure is so much that if you are not a strong person, you will start thinking that you have a problem.

Now let everyone listen to me, if you are married, congratulations and I wish you well. But it is an invasion of privacy to be asking people when they are getting married. And it is wrong of you to disrespect people because they are not married. Some people even think single or unmarried people are irresponsible or lose. If you are a man, some people will also insinuate that may be you are impotent. ‪#‎smile‬. I have seen situations where some married people believe you should accord them special respect because they are married and you are not.

Let me continue by saying that I am not married and I don't need anybody's advice on why I am not yet married. I personally will not tolerate disrespect from anyone because I am not married. Neither will I accord anyone special respect because he or she is married. I will only respect you if you deserve my respect, whether you are married or single is immaterial to me.

Finally, let it be clear that single or unmarried status is not a disease that needs to be cured. And to all the single and unmarried people out there, your destiny is in your own hands. Whether you allow the society to make you feel inadequate or not, depends on you. Always remember that there is nothing wrong with you. Also, know that everybody cannot get married at the same time. In fact, I don't have problem with anyone who doesn't want to get married at all.

Thank you and share your thoughts.

.. and he spoke out of anger

3Dee:


Bros, I thought I was the only one in that shoe until I came upon ur post. The stigmatisation is real bro. There's even this man at my work place that normally ask after my mum anytime I greet him---meaning I'm still a boy who's probably living under mummy's roof and eating mummy thank you food. Can you imagine!!!
I still dey count am for the guy, the day wey I go surprise am with slaps don dey ripe.
Just watch out Una go hear for nairaland.

lol... U got me laughing this morning...

Me wen just finish serving my father's land 5 months ago.. I never get job now self... But the big question for every of my family mouth na... Patrick were is your fiancee??..

I just tire... I was expecting them to be worried about me not having job for almost 5 months now.... Na marriage dey their mind.... Mtcheeeeewwwwwwww.... Who marriage help?

I won make money first... Marriage can come anytime jor

anwe:


[s]Abi you no want marry ? in African society there are certain expectations, to be a man you must show yourself as a man. Being a man has nothing to do with biological age but your actions.[/s]

I will attend 2 weddings later this month and I have prepared my mind for the inevitable questions. No be today.

Imagine! Some people will tell me: "oga, get serious and settle down. You are already looking like a daddy" I think they are only looking at my 1- super pack tummy.

Nigerians sha. Never bothered me much. Well, I guess it's easier for guys to ignore such comments than you ladies.

Some might actually mean well

Op.....shurrup,,,,,,go and marry.....
Runs outta thread with speed of light...

3Dee:


Bros, I thought I was the only one in that shoe until I came upon ur post. The stigmatisation is real bro. There's even this man at my work place that normally ask after my mum anytime I greet him---meaning I'm still a boy who's probably living under mummy's roof and eating mummy thank you food. Can you imagine!!!
I still dey count am for the guy, the day wey I go surprise am with slaps don dey ripe.
Just watch out Una go hear for nairaland.

no go slap person oooooo. ... In short someone ask me dat kind tin yesterday

I've heard stories of how some parents make their unmarried daughters go through shits. They stigmatise them, ask them not to buy things in the house especially when she stays with them.
Although, I've never been asked about marriage or my spouse at home. I still feel the need of fulfilling or doing what is right. Deep down, I have this fear for marriage. Another part of me wants it so bad.
I think our society has placed too much importance on marriage. They have made us believe that you have spiritual husband or wife if u cant get married as early as possible.

You have spoken well. One bottle of orijin for you.

Abeg take am easy ooo guy mayb his just joking

3Dee:


Bros, I thought I was the only one in that shoe until I came upon ur post. The stigmatisation is real bro. There's even this man at my work place that normally ask after my mum anytime I greet him---meaning I'm still a boy who's probably living under mummy's roof and eating mummy thank you food. Can you imagine!!!
I still dey count am for the guy, the day wey I go surprise am with slaps don dey ripe.
Just watch out Una go hear for nairaland.

The stigmatisation is real at work, married women close early and they don't work on saturday,while the single got no family to care for so you stay back,i don't contest it I just smile,the recent ones was when we needed an apartment 3 landlady denied us claiming they don't want single,the society is one anchor of divorce,my folks don't taunt me with it thou,they know with time I will do the needfull.

Henrypraise:
Once u start workin, even ur enemy wants u to get married.

In my formal office, I was given a 30days in 1 week off, wen I tried to protest, I was told m not married n it shud remain like dat. Whereas d married once stay in d office doin almost notin.

I fail to understand what you are saying due to you gi-ra-mar!

Why would you be married when you stil bear 'Starboy' at your old age. Your village juju is at work brother.

Unionised:
Me thinks you protest too much.

Life is all about perspective.

Me thinks you did not get the pastor's message bro.

An analogy for you.....

"Two prisoners looked out of the prison bars. One saw mud, the other saw stars."

Let's always do our best to pick out the positives in any situation.

Let me help the Pastor. You see my brother, IRON SHARPENETH IRON.

Move with like-minded people. Capice?

Having a ring on your finger has absolutely nothing to do with your quality as a human being. There are married people that sleep around, that are violent and drunk. That whole analogy is moot, n the preacher is very uninformed he is just creating unnecessary division

This criticism is d product of the primitive thoughts and idea that is embedded in the black mind.....perharps as time comeS it will wane in our mentality