SaintNemesis:
She should do whatever is best for her. She alone knows what is best for Herself.

If I was in her shoes though I will go for the scholarship. If I can't convince him to join me in US, then I will return his bride price sharp...sharp.

The scholarship maybe God's way of delivering her from a bad marriage.

I couldn't help but exclaim @the bolded.
Just like that? You will return the bride-price? A man you claimed you loved enough to marry, you will just return the bride-price in less than a week after the wedding? Iffa hear! Let's keep lying anonymously sha on the Internet!! It's allowed only here because noone could be that rash in real life.

Besides, are you the one that will return your bride-price? What if your family doesn't't support your decision?

lefulefu:

gbam
the ex will be giving her various monkey styles in za oza room.just imagine she"s financially dependent on the ex while in yankee.na for d ex to turn her to sex slave be dat.

Una just make me remember my ex we broke up on a bad note buh chick told me she will open leg for me anytime anywhere.
And I know she ain't joking

Liliyann:


Is that what has been keeping your marriage?
Money??

Not really, but since you have decided to be insensitive on the mans side. You didnt even suggest ways it could be settled amicablely to reach a compromise. You know most of you women always play the victim card

Job Vacancy!!! Those interested in being trained as health workers while earning extra income should please forward their names and phone numbers to 08035038804 for enrollment

MissJoy29:

Hmmmm...what if there was no bad "dumping"? What if at the time you guys were together, you both noticed how incompatible you were & decide to end things amicably while being friends? You certainly didn't marry(or won't get married to) ALL your exes. So don't make it look like it's a big deal having an ex & one with a good heart at that.

Human traffickers? In/to Libya? Lol...isn't that a little bit extreme a scenario for your mind to conjure up? Besides, hello....the story is about Nigeria, US & Poland! No libya in view

even if na US d ex dey dont tell me d ex wont make any moves on her wen she comes over .and how will she resist him since he"s the one who will be financing her.i am already feeling sorry for d hubby sef.

UyaiIncomparabl:
She had better accept the scholarship. That man will leave her if he were offered the same opportunity. Selfish men who wouldn't place their wives before anything.

I'll take the scholarship and leave immediately, in the end, I'll marry a white man.
White men are sweet, plus you'll get enough dollars.
Nigerian men are over used materials and should be castrated.

My own opinion. It's quiet simple. Get her pregnant bfo going. She can always come home once a year. And the man can go visiting on vacation. This can be easily sorted out

sharpwriter:


Shebi na you women... In my little experience, you people take foolish, illogical and heart rending risks and behave like super men. All she needs is a small sentiment to convince herself. Or reading some comments here, she'll make up her mind and damn everything ; after all it's about better life and abroad is "heaven" to most Nigerians

Lol....don't mind us sometimes. It's the emotions

marvin906:




Una just make me remember my ex we broke up on a bad note buh chick told me she will open leg for me anytime anywhere.
And I know she ain't joking

OKAFOR"s LAW
welldone

lefulefu:

gbam
the ex will be giving her various monkey styles in za oza room.just imagine she"s financially dependent on the ex while in yankee.na for d ex to turn her to sex slave be dat.

Chai... Broda Lefulefu go give the man heart attack if he's reading this o.... She will eventually be dependent on the guy at least for some time. If she'll work it may be seasonal, and if not, it's definite she won't get job immediately. Also, that $400 per month is below chicken change..... Earning $1000 per month in Yankee sef na from hand to mouth wages.... Such $400 only makes sense if it's spent in a place like Nigeria. $400 there won't take her far, it may not even cover a month's rent even though you sharing apartment with another person. I pray God help them with decision.....

lefulefu:

even if na US d ex dey dont tell me d ex wont make any moves on her wen she comes over .and how will she resist him since he"s the one who will be financing her.i am already feeling sorry for d hubby sef.

Now you are back to what I was saying earlier (not to you though). Let me repeat it: if the lady has sense, she shouldn't go especially if the ex is in the US & knowing she's married.

MissJoy29:
Lol....don't mind us sometimes. It's the emotions

It's well.

MissJoy29:

Now you are back to what I was saying earlier (not to you though). Let me repeat it: if the lady has sense, she shouldn't go especially if the ex is in the US & knowing she's married.

she shouldnt go if d ex is dere?
ifa hear

OGHENAOGIE:
submission doesn't implies doing wat ur husband want...i hp u remember d bible said d husband shd loves d wife like Christ love the church and gave himself for her...of d scholars is important for d woman career and advancedment de can work things out otherwise if na my sister choose d scholarship...who says d man can't sacrifice for d wife like Christ did for d church

It's not a debate

She has to submit to her husband decision on this

lefulefu:

she shouldnt go if d ex is dere?
ifa hear

I thought that's what you are advocating for. How it's now funny beats my imagination

Teddiie:


Wawu!!!..Coming from a man?Ayam stunned

I think you know it

This happens when you marry a mini man . Dude even said he's processing Poland. . Wetin your brain dey do for Poland, oga? .

Women should be able to spot these kind of men with fragile ego who always want to be in charge of people's lives

Until we understand our culture very well & the meaning of marriage then all the material things will be the last on our mind. In Africa it is traditional marriage that counts, white wedding is a scam

OdiaI:
Marriage is about sacrifice and compromise most times. Keep white wedding aside, by the laws of the land, she is legally married.

Now, she is married to her husband, not her ex. If the husband doesn't want her to go and she goes, it may bring up issues later on. Moreover, if the Poland is sure, why not be patient with her husband for them to go there later. A marriage of one week old is a very young one, does she want to just end it without giving it proper thought?

If she feels taking the scholarship is best for her, let her sit with her husband and see if they can work up a plan that will benefit the marriage.

Whatever decision she takes, she should put her marriage into consideration. She is very married, put aside white wedding talks. Traditional marriage is not engagement party.

You're very sensible jare..... Chop knuckle

A good example of how foolish the average naija female is. Leave your future and follow man Na. Shiooorrrrr. As if the husband would ask such stupid question if he got that offer.

Why do I have the impression that the said ex is the brain behind this scholarship and may even be working in that US school?
Anyway, its the husband to decide because as for me, this is no case at all as an ex is supposed to remain an ex and not call my wife for anything no matter what! Also, what is really $400/month worth outside Nigeria?

If that man truly love her and support her dream,then he should allow her go. They are both married now. And both can plan for him to join her. I see no reason why she have to choose when she can have both and make the most from this.

Shopatcandice:
If that man truly love her and support her dream,then he should allow her go. They are both married now. And both can plan for him to join her. I see no reason why she have to choose when she can have both and make the most from this.

.. And what if her ex is planning the whole stuff just to make her come over and stay with him,should she still go? Please answer me with all honesty .

AZeD1:


This bold is not true.
A smart couple would choose the better opportunity and decide.

If this girl is my sister, I'll advice her to take the scholarship opportunity.

This is not an opportunity bro. This is slavery and a very bad move by an ex to challenge another man's marriage.

doshe39:
I think you know it

Of course but I am stunned it's coming from a man.. Very few men will admit this..

DEHVEHLOP:





Are you Igbo man from aroshuku?

i barnish u from d land pf stupidity IJN

na2016:


This is not an opportunity bro. This is slavery and a very bad move by an ex to challenge another man's marriage.

.. Very smart of you to have reasoned this way. Not every man is sensible enough to read in between lines just like you did. Gracias bro.

MissJoy29:

I thought that's what you are advocating for. How it's now funny beats my imagination

its her decision to take
i am not advocating for anything
but if i was the husband i will say bye bye to the marriage .

hisexcellency34:
Stay with your man. US is no big deal. Even Atiku with all his money refuses to go

Atiku wants to go, they dont want Atiku.

Husbands are very hard to come by these days. Very hard, and it doesnt matter if you are in Nigeria or abroad.

The US culture is no longer encouraging marriage sef. They want people to be in immoral cohabitation.

Does she love her husband? If she does this should not be a hard decision. Because it came to nairaland i will say she is struggling with decision between husband and US. That betrays her depth of love for the man.

na2016:


This is not an opportunity bro. This is slavery and a very bad move by an ex to challenge another man's marriage.

very true
the ex is sending the message on code to the husband that he the ex is above him
and that he d ex is the one opening the way for the wife
and that he the ex can collect the wife if he so feels like
now the wife will be wondering why did she not marry her ex in the first place.
gbege

UyaiIncomparabl:
She had better accept the scholarship. That man will leave her if he were offered the same opportunity. Selfish men who wouldn't place their wives before anything.

I'll take the scholarship and leave immediately, in the end, I'll marry a white man.
White men are sweet, plus you'll get enough dollars.
Nigerian men are over used materials and should be castrated.

dollar kill u there