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I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor - Romance (3) - Nairaland

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UPDATED-My strange Experience With A Runs Girl As An Undergraduate / I Love Her But... Now I'm Embarrassed / I Don’t Love Her (2) (3) (4)

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Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by pocohantas(f): 6:16pm On Jun 06, 2019
elantraceey:




There's a difference please, theirs is consensual , the ladies actually want to get married unlike the Hausa that gives out their daughters without the daughters consent.

Can a minor give consent?

2 Likes

Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by Nobody: 6:20pm On Jun 06, 2019
This is just BS.

A 30 years old dating an 18 years old girl.. Grooming.

She hasn't even fully known herself!

This kind of relationship is usually abusive. She's still in
the process of building her identity. This kind of relationship leads to her building her identity around this man. Let's not even go into how manipulative this can be.



Parentss please please and please, don't let your teenage daughters date men who are more than 3 years older than they.
When she gets to the age of 25, she can date a man 100 years older than her if she likes.

OP leave her alone. Her life is just beginning.

If at the age of 25 she still likes you,then you can date her.
Period.

12 Likes 1 Share

Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by Nobody: 6:24pm On Jun 06, 2019
GT07115:
well she is not naive as u think and to put the record straight I am the third guy she will be dating, I can count the number of ladies I have messed up with where, when and how it happened to this very moment , I am not a sex freak I was celibate for good 3 years without a woman no joke. When u talk about older ladies I laugh, older ladies who is either a graduate or self dependent I have come across are not submissive and ready to learn or take advice that will even better their lives, those who are graduate don't want to learn a trade to be self reliant rather they want to do business or secure a job they have no knowledge of. When I approached her I thought she was in her twenties but I was surprised to get the opposite and to me is a perfect age I love, I don't want old cargoes, I want a woman I can look at in 20 years from now I will still have an erection, sex is 80 percent in marriage and anything that will keep that fired burning to me is welcome and age is one of it. So don't take me for a sex starve man or an opportunist, I want her for a wife not sex machine, I am only disturb because humans are unpredictable and I don't have the financial muscles owing to other families responsibility.

9 Likes

Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by ChristianNorth: 6:27pm On Jun 06, 2019
GT07115:
well she is not naive as u think and to put the record straight I am the third guy she will be dating, I can count the number of ladies I have messed up with where, when and how it happened to this very moment , I am not a sex freak I was celibate for good 3 years without a woman no joke. When u talk about older ladies I laugh, older ladies who is either a graduate or self dependent I have come across are not submissive and ready to learn or take advice that will even better their lives, those who are graduate don't want to learn a trade to be self reliant rather they want to do business or secure a job they have no knowledge of. When I approached her I thought she was in her twenties but I was surprised to get the opposite and to me is a perfect age I love, I don't want old cargoes, I want a woman I can look at in 20 years from now I will still have an erection, sex is 80 percent in marriage and anything that will keep that fired burning to me is welcome and age is one of it. So don't take me for a sex starve man or an opportunist, I want her for a wife not sex machine, I am only disturb because humans are unpredictable and I don't have the financial muscles owing to other families responsibility.
Boss, you don't owe any shitt any explanation, she is of legal age and you are not blackmailing her into marriage.

Personally, I won't allow my girl of 18 to get married to a guy who is over 24.

I would be more comfortable giving her out to someone 28 at age 23.

Nevertheless, you are not committing any crime marrying an 18 year old girl.

About sponsoring her school fees, I would only say "hmmm", but I would prefer if you do that for your wife only.

5 Likes

Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by Nobody: 6:29pm On Jun 06, 2019
This is manipulative as f*ck.
I don't care if it's legal or not.

See the way they're talking about "marry her before you train her"

No wonder some women see marriage as a trap.

Uncle, don't train her. Leave her alone. She'll be fine.

Just know her eyes won't be closed for ever.

8 Likes

Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by Samyj247: 6:30pm On Jun 06, 2019
bro marry her first before sponsoring her education. pls don't try anything other than this. if she really wants to have u as her husband then, she and her family should allow marriage first then u can sponsor her in school. I repeat, don't ever try sponsoring her education when u have not married her. if they don't accept this pls lv her and find another person. u will b surprise to know that someone else out there as beautiful as her will still put that smile on your face.

cc GT07115
Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by Nobody: 6:43pm On Jun 06, 2019
ibkayee:
I find the age gap between the two of you creepy because of how young she is but she’s technically legal I guess and if she’s ok with it, you two should flourish.

I have a feeling she’s going to dump you once you put her through school/start a trade for her and she sharpens up lol.

Same way you’re probably taking advantage of her naivety and financial situation now to some extent (not necessarily saying you don’t love her) is the way she may take advantage of the help you’re about to provide her, she may not be thinking that way now but give it a few years lol. I could be wrong, it’s just an inkling after all. Good luck either way cheesy

You have accurately described it. They are both gaming each other. We can not say how it will end. He is taking advantage of her poverty to get himself a future trophy wife, and she is taking advantage of his lust to set herself up for a better future.


If during the time she is in school, the guy polishes himself, they may still be able to roll. If not the girl will be ashamed of the raz , smelly trader as her own levels or her perception of her levels ( great expectations tins) have changed.

5 Likes

Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by nuelyoyo(m): 6:50pm On Jun 06, 2019
generationz:
@GT07115

Your case is simple.

Finding someone we flow with and can meet our standards is difficult.


What you'll do is this

Start a business for her or let her learn a trade. Make sure the business is something she can do with or without a store eg buying and selling second clothes , shoes and bags or Chinese commodities.

If she decides on her learning a trade let it be something she can do for ladies eg hairdressing , tailoring etc. Even shoe making is a big business if your designs are awesome you can sell a shoe for 30k or more , she can sell sandals for as high as 12k. ( google dechayilsshoes on Instagram she's a graduate that worked in a corporate setting before becoming a big time shoemaker.)


Whatever you choose to start for her is what she'll use to sponsors herself through school. When she knows she is responsible for her schooling she will become mature quickly and be responsible with money and her education.


While you start the trade for her make sure you wed her. Don't train a girl in school without marrying her first. She might betray you


The okrika business is another one that sells like hot cake on Instagram and universities as long as she has an eye for trendy and sexy wears.

I know a lady who has two cars from okrika sales. She has a big store. The way she advertises the clothes on Instagram ehn ..

Make sure whatever she chooses to do she is good at it because she will be training herself while you cater for family expenses.

Don't give her money to start business. Make sure you are part of the whole process at the beginning.
Also, teach her money management skills.

You guys can put off child bearing while she's in for the first few years then when she's in her third year you impregnate her. That's your insurance ( if you know what I mean)

Good luck

PS you are not obligated to take care of her family or siblings responsibilities. Make sure you are marrying a lady you know loves and understands you ( not only you loving her). U known many women who wrecked their fiances finances because he had to cater for her and her family . Most times it ends in separation. You are the man , take charge. Don't reveal your full income to her if you feel she will be immature and blackmail you into ceding her family .
Wisdom laden post

1 Like

Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by ibkayee(f): 6:55pm On Jun 06, 2019
ornicus:


You have accurately described it. They are both gaming each other. We can not say how it will end. He is taking advantage of her poverty to get himself a future trophy wife, and she is taking advantage of his lust to set herself up for a better future.


If during the time she is in school, the guy polishes himself, they may still be able to roll. If not the girl will be ashamed of the raz , smelly trader as her own levels or her perception of her levels ( great expectations tins) have changed.
I actually cackled grin

1 Like

Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by lonelygem(m): 7:00pm On Jun 06, 2019
GT07115:
Hi peeps, I am in love with an 18 years old lady who is from a very poor background as mine, I will be 30 this year and I intend settling down maritally this year or early next year, I would have loved her to gain admission before doing anything marriage with her. I have discussed going back to school with her and getting a trade along, by her consent to it I have gave her money to enroll for jamb and NECO exam which will make her secure admission this year, the jamb result is out and OK pending NECO exam which will start next week, my problem is the parent are financially handicapped to contribute a dime to her education and we are not married that means the whole stuff is on my head, I would have loved to marry this year if she was already in school or a graduate, I am the first son with responsibility of putting my younger ones through school. I feel I will be shouldering a lot of responsibility, the relationship is just one way sided and the parents don't give a breathing space whenever she spends some hours late in my house, like reminding me we are not married, the whole thing is that I love her, she is a lady I can talk to, and very young and beautiful.

What was your motivation for dating her at the beginning bro?

I want to assume the relationship involved sex and now, 18 against 30. Can you swear that you were not having this plans of calling it quit with her?

You are creating an impression of being a good guy after taken advantage of the poor girl.

If you heard this done to your younger sister, how would u feel? Would your mind pray for such guy or otherwise?

If you are good at structuring your stories, know that some others are good at listening..

I'd rather hurt you with truth than console you with lies..

No offense meant bro.

5 Likes

Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by Mcslize: 7:01pm On Jun 06, 2019
badadvice:


same here man.
I intend to get married at 28-30.
I already have eyes set on a 16 yrs old young lady in my area.
I'm literally only waiting for her to turn nineteen (cos by then i'll be 28) before i throw my hook.
I cant come and marry a lady that will turn unappealing when she clocks 40 while i'm just 45 and still agile.

Exactly. You are on track.

1 Like

Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by Nobody: 7:05pm On Jun 06, 2019
coldFLARES1:
One young man sits down, shuts himself to the world; isolates a girl that's bogged down witha huge deficit; gets fixated on her and thinks she's the next best thing after fried rice!

Quite refreshing to think that your love story would have a happy ending.

You're a firstborn, probably with siblings, whose parents may still be alive and the best girl you visualize a future with is an 18 yr old whose parents are so poor they cannot foot the bill of their child's tertiary education?

You'll surely get what's coming to you, and more sensible young men would learn.

Her innocence attracted him, lolll.
Baba as it stands now ur take should be from 24 upwards,. Look for a working partner, of cos the won't be innocent like the young bride.

2 Likes

Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by Ladyhippolyta88(f): 7:06pm On Jun 06, 2019
GT07115:
well she is not naive as u think and to put the record straight I am the third guy she will be dating, I can count the number of ladies I have messed up with where, when and how it happened to this very moment , I am not a sex freak I was celibate for good 3 years without a woman no joke. When u talk about older ladies I laugh, older ladies who is either a graduate or self dependent I have come across are not submissive and ready to learn or take advice that will even better their lives, those who are graduate don't want to learn a trade to be self reliant rather they want to do business or secure a job they have no knowledge of. When I approached her I thought she was in her twenties but I was surprised to get the opposite and to me is a perfect age I love, I don't want old cargoes, I want a woman I can look at in 20 years from now I will still have an erection, sex is 80 percent in marriage and anything that will keep that fired burning to me is welcome and age is one of it. So don't take me for a sex starve man or an opportunist, I want her for a wife not sex machine, I am only disturb because humans are unpredictable and I don't have the financial muscles owing to other families responsibility.
The bold is why you are looking for a more younger lady because she can still be inexperienced and naive to say yes to your orders with little or no choices. At 18 that you are the third guy she is dating does not mean she is mature or really knows what she wants.
At the rest of this post I laugh. Like as if you won't have a potbelly that would make you look like a rejected cargo. Seems it is easier to throw shades on females.

13 Likes

Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by fascia(m): 7:14pm On Jun 06, 2019
This is somehow tricky.
Though maturity differs but I think she's still young, she definitely doesn't know what she want. Let her experience life small before she is tied down with marriage. Let her explore on her own at lest you did too.. So she won't regret loosing her youth to marriage.

Concerning education, any contribution you make there should be considered a donation or investment In a person you care about, love as u said.this should be done with no aim of getting anything back, even marriage. Don't make it a blackail or bondage for her. Let her know you see in a her a future partner and u love her and it her decision to marry you or not... Let her choose u it's easier that way. You can pay for her first 2 years in school, preferably pay part and let her parents do the rest,afterall she's their child.

Consider the 2 years a courtship/dating...it will shed more light on if you love each other/compactibility.at the end of the 2nd year ,you can both decide if you want to marry each other, you that claim to love her now might think differently later.
Use the 2 years to develop yourself more financially,you would be surprise what you can do with proper motivation.

Lastly I understand time is not a commodity you can afford but anything worthwhile take time, effort and hardworking. It's marriage it has to be done well.
My 2 cent

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by uckennety(m): 7:16pm On Jun 06, 2019
HitSong:

30 years old chasing after 18 years old child...
You're a pervert!
What about all those girls of your age group that you fuckéd back then, who are you leaving them for to marry now?
Now you've seen a young beautiful virgin that you want to devour abi?
Will you give out your daughter at 18?
Karma will play out on the females in your life too...
Ẹ̀gbọ́n leave that small girl alone and Goan hustle.


Dumb post

1 Like

Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by Ocon: 7:19pm On Jun 06, 2019
He who has an Ear, Let him hear...

I can't shout!! cheesy

2 Likes

Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by ibkayee(f): 7:20pm On Jun 06, 2019
Ocon:
He who has an Ear, Let him hear...

I can't shout!! cheesy
Lmao
Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by uckennety(m): 7:26pm On Jun 06, 2019
Mcslize:


I don't think 30 years old guy is too old for an 18years old girl approaching 19. Most of these girls, you see these days are so mature in body. You might not even think she is 18.

Like me: I have told myself that I won't marry my mate. Most of the ladies that are 30years old I have seen are like my 45 years old aunty.

Sometimes, I noticed that my aunty is even way younger than some of them and this makes me feel, what will happen if I get married to my mate? She will definitely look way too older in appearance even if I am older than her with 1 to 2 years.


As a guy in his early 30's as the Op, I won't even marry a girl I am older than with 3 years let alone a mate. If I am 30, I would comfortably marry a girl I am older than with 10 years gap.

If a girl I am older than with 5 years comes my way, and she is up and well doing, I might reconsider. But in all, I should be older than my wife with 6 -10 years gap due to the fast maturation that ladies undergo.


Correct bro


Am 32 dating an 18years old girl


That's 15years gap


Boss do what makes you happy


I decided this cuz I what someone who will appreciate me with pure feelings not someone that is with me out of necessity


Most older girls out there will just date cuz the want a man in their life not that the appreciate him.


Imagine I'll see a hot beautiful girl of 25-30 years old still single

Does it mean that all her life she never met a serious guy who loved her?

https://www.nairaland.com/5092186/why-ladies-prefer-bad-guys

https://www.nairaland.com/5085751/reasons-why-ladies-finds-it


So bro I think your doing the girl and yourself a favour


But know that a woman will always be a woman both small or big

So be careful don't put ur mind in it

3 Likes

Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by elantraceey(f): 7:38pm On Jun 06, 2019
pocohantas:

Can a minor give consent?
An 18 yrs old girl in the op's case is not a minor .
Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by HitSong: 7:42pm On Jun 06, 2019
uckennety:



Dumb post
In your face!

1 Like

Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by elantraceey(f): 7:43pm On Jun 06, 2019
uckennety:



Correct bro


Am 32 dating an 18years old girl


That's 15years gap


Boss do what makes you happy


I decided this cuz I what someone who will appreciate me with pure feelings not someone that is with me out of necessity


Most older girls out there will just date cuz the want a man in their life not that the appreciate him.


Imagine I'll see a hot beautiful girl of 25-30 years old still single

Does it mean that all her life she never met a serious guy who loved her?

https://www.nairaland.com/5092186/why-ladies-prefer-bad-guys

https://www.nairaland.com/5085751/reasons-why-ladies-finds-it


So bro I think your doing the girl and yourself a favour


But know that a woman will always be a woman both small or big

So be careful don't put ur mind in it


Now let you correct you on something, A girl of 30 yrs can be single not because of she was promiscuous all her youth but there are several reasons that could make a lady stay single that long. Plus your idea of age gap is wack , a 20 year old girl can look like she's in her 30s in two years if she doesn't take good care of her self, same way an older lady can look 16 most of her life with good maintenance, so I'll advice you guys to stop taking advantage of children's innocence and exploit them for yourself at their young age .

11 Likes 1 Share

Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by elantraceey(f): 7:46pm On Jun 06, 2019
Jollof123:


We need proof and witnesses...


Lol, so I should drag my friend online because you need proof? Go to the north and go and ask those young girls you see with old men how old they were when they marriage their husbands, someone has a smiling face doesn't mean all is well .

2 Likes

Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by Jollof123: 7:52pm On Jun 06, 2019
elantraceey:



Lol, so I should drag my friend online because you need proof? Go to the north and go and ask those young girls you see with old men how old they were when they marriage their husbands, someone has a smiling face doesn't mean all is well .

Yes...drag her here onlinev cheesy
Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by Nobody: 7:53pm On Jun 06, 2019
elantraceey:



Now let you correct you on something, A girl of 30 yrs can be single not because of she was promiscuous all her youth but there are several reasons that could make a lady stay single that long. Plus your idea of age gap is wack , a 20 year old girl can look like she's in her 30s in two years if she doesn't take good care of her self, same way an older lady can look 16 most of her life with good maintenance, so I'll advice you guys to stop taking advantage of children's innocence and exploit them for yourself at their young age .

There is an unfortunate element you have missed. This whole scenario is mired in poverty. It is in poverty that a girl will be looking at someone 10 -15 years older than her as desirable. It is the same poverty that will make sex starved incels opt for young ladies who will be easy to woo or chance. It is the same poverty that will make women age quickly.

8 Likes

Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by SageMK: 7:55pm On Jun 06, 2019
breakerofchains:
This is manipulative as f*ck.
I don't care if it's legal or not.

See the way they're talking about "marry her before you train her"

No wonder some women see marriage as a trap.

Uncle, don't train her. Leave her alone. She'll be fine.

Just know her eyes won't be closed for ever.


The education here is a catch. According to his post she's on track to enroll into school. Do you prefer she skips on education simply due to your bad vibes about him? — Don't forget, this certainly will empower her life.

Sure there are some lines in his post that question his intentions but overall, she'll be better off with this union.
Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by Acidosis(m): 8:15pm On Jun 06, 2019
GT07115:
Hi peeps, I am in love with an 18 years old lady who is from a very poor background as mine, I will be 30 this year and I intend settling down maritally this year or early next year, I would have loved her to gain admission before doing anything marriage with her. I have discussed going back to school with her and getting a trade along, by her consent to it I have gave her money to enroll for jamb and NECO exam which will make her secure admission this year, the jamb result is out and OK pending NECO exam which will start next week, my problem is the parent are financially handicapped to contribute a dime to her education and we are not married that means the whole stuff is on my head, I would have loved to marry this year if she was already in school or a graduate, I am the first son with responsibility of putting my younger ones through school. I feel I will be shouldering a lot of responsibility, the relationship is just one way sided and the parents don't give a breathing space whenever she spends some hours late in my house, like reminding me we are not married, the whole thing is that I love her, she is a lady I can talk to, and very young and beautiful.

Someone is going to blame or curse you soon for marrying her at an early age.

3 Likes

Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by Nobody: 8:30pm On Jun 06, 2019
Never date a broke girl...

Date people within your social class...

2 Likes

Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by Nobody: 8:32pm On Jun 06, 2019
eni4real:
Never date a broke girl...

Date people within your social class...


both the guy and the girl are broke. thats why there is all this manipulation and maneuvering.

8 Likes

Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by Nobody: 8:34pm On Jun 06, 2019
ornicus:


both the guy and the girl are broke. thats why there is all this manipulation and maneuvering.
The guys seem desperate tho!!
30 years old guy professing quick and emergency love for an 18 year old broke girl just like that...

3 Likes

Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by Nobody: 8:35pm On Jun 06, 2019
elantraceey:


An 18 yrs old girl in the op's case is not a minor .

You talked about 15yr olds desiring marriage, someone mentioned about the happenings in the North and criticisms. You replied that the difference is the ones down South give consent.

So, I asked, can a minor give consent?

3 Likes

Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by Nobody: 8:38pm On Jun 06, 2019
eni4real:
The guys seem desperate tho!!
30 years old guy professing quick and emergency love for an 18 year old broke girl just like that...

because he is too broke to chase his age mates na. 18 year old girl can be wined and dined with N500 suya. 25 year old uni grads wey he dey look expect tantalizers with their friends minimum

6 Likes

Re: I Love Her But She Is An Undergraduate And Poor by Nobody: 8:42pm On Jun 06, 2019
ornicus:


because he is too broke to chase his age mates na. 18 year old girl can be wined and dined with N500 suya. 25 year old uni grads wey he dey look expect tantalizers with their friends minimum
He claimed to be the breadwinner of his family. I expect him to have some ability to pay bills...

Women expand in all things with time. He can never know the true potential of this girl until the girl's true character buds out...

Dating a young and broke lady is dangerous...

3 Likes

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