You sound like a pussie,,. Damn everyone and marry her. If you chicken away you are actively complicit in the same thing you are lamenting about.

Christopherrrr:


Nothing is absolutely wrong with me. Yes I have found love but the consequences are way far beyond me. It's not only gonna affect me alone but every other being from my father's loins. My parents will have a fair share of the consequences same is applicable to my siblings and every other person that involves themselves in a marital way with them. Honestly, I don't wish this for my worst enemy. Damning the consequences is easier said than done in this part of the world. To bad we ain't in the Western world where there is individualistic lifestyle.

Herein lies the answer you seek. Just find a way to subtly tell her it would not work because of what you discovered from your enquiry and let everyone move on.

Zikora1000:
if you are looking for someone that will give you peace of mind. come, let me show you one. her only fault, she is over 6ft tall. but nice shape humble and very pretty too.

biko send her over here. I love tall girls

Christopherrrr:
Hello Nairalanders, greetings. My name is Christopher (pseudonym) from the Eastern part of the country, Imo State to be precise. I'm a man in his early 30's. I have an active account here but I had to sign-up for another account for this thread.
Please pardon my grammatical errors and blunders. MOD please help move to FP.

Few months back, I fell in love with a pretty lady with a beautiful soul. She is 28. Though we are running a long distance relationship but the current in the communication link can power Kanji Dam. Lol!! We can be on calls for hours since the very day I met her. There is a fair share of the feelings, affections, respect and regard for each other. It's not one-sided. Though we have been opportune to be together thrice since the past 10months we met. I have had plans to go about engagement and marriage arrangements this coming festive period though I haven't made this known to her.

She gives me joy, she gives me happiness, she prays for me, she blesses me. There is a part of me she unraveled that I never believed existed. Above all, she gives me peace of mind.

Fast forward to last month, I invited her to a family event. I introduced her to my family as my girlfriend. Instantly everyone fell in love with her. My mum was allover her and she was indeed up and doing. She didn't disappoint me. Not pretence, she has a good home training.

When she left same day after the event, my mum proclaimed her love for her. She said, "Olee ebe isi choota udi nwa nke a?" (Where did you find this kinda girl from?). This made me drop a tear of joy thereafter because I've always prayed for such from her any day I introduce a lady to her. This also happens to be my first time.

Fast forward again to 2weeks later, my dad requested I confirm her community and kindred properly because we happen to come from the same LGA. I didn't even know they have started making inquiries for me even before I asked them to. I confirmed from her and informed my dad. Only for them (my parents) to break the news to me days later that we can't marry from their kindred because they are regarded as Out-Casts (Osu-Cast System). Right now, I can't contend my heartbreak. I'm so devastated and confused.

This has been a long-term tradition that has been for centuries that I don't think it's in my capabilities to do away with it or do otherwise.

My problem now is how do I break the news to her for a breakup because we can't continue like this.

I have never ceased to love her less since the very day I learnt of this. In fact, she gives me reasons to love, cherish and adore her every single day. I still do that to the brim and don't have regrets. Quote me, her type is rare. I love this girl with every breath I take. I just cry myself to sleep every night after our long calls.

Please advise a brother because I'm in a deep state of dilemma.

OSU has been abolished in Igboland, on 28 Dec 2018 with a curse places on anyone who calls another Igbo OSU, all the Igbo traditional rulers participated.
Don't bring a curse on your family which can only be atoned with a sacrifice at Inri

Love isn’t enough to make a marriage work bro,listen to your parents

To me love comes first
And I will do anything that makes me happy weather the world likes it or not.
My life my rules.

IPOB, kings and queens of hypocrisy. They are on nairaland day and night claiming Osu caste system has been abolished.

Ibo people change your ways! Talking out of both sides of your mouth all the time

addictiv:

The most important blessing is that of the parents of the bride... Once they give their consent every other thing na formality. What of people who are orphans, or people who don't have family, don't they get married? Last I checked most marriages that ended in divorce or worse were blessed by both parents and the priest. For me Honoring your parents as a man means informing them of your decision to get married and carrying them along with the process. Should they declare ill feelings and misgivings it is within their right to do so. It is now left for me to proceed or rescind on my plan. As far as honoring goes they have been honoured

You mention orphans- this is a different context. It is important that you do not muddle the two. The man in question is not an orphan.

We do not like it, so we try to minimalise, mock or trivalise the importance of parental blessings "online", yes. I understand. However, marriage is an off-line adventure. Both parents are of equal pedestal; I am not sure why one set should be considered above the other.
The man should follow his head and not his heart. The "heart is very deceitful above all things" Jer 17: 9. The head, when operating alone, speaks common sense. If his head says, "marry", by all means, proceed. If his head says, "no", then you do not, no matter how painful it is.

I wish him the best.

My brother, like one of the persons that commented rightly said, The scriptures overrules tradition. You will regret this action till you die if you lose this lady because of tradition. Fight the tradition and stand strong upon the word of God. The Word of God is God And if God supercedes tradition, then stand upon the word of God. Fight for this great gift that God has given you. It will surprises you that at the end of the day you will be celebrated. Except if you are not born again but if you are and you have a relationship with God. I can guarantee you that you will win at last. Even though your people will be against you but please don't give up on that lady. It is God's gift for you. the rest of mind you have with her now will be forever till you die and by the way your parent won't spend the rest of your live with you. your wife will do. Make a choice that you can be bold to say you did. Don't follow the crowd in your family line. Stand out. Don't be in the Multitude, be distinguished. The Blessing of a wife is the greatest you can ever get. Marrying right will make your life right even if was wrong before. God has blessed you with a good gift, don't let the devil rob you in the name of tradition. don't forget the devil comes to steal, to kill and to destroy...... don't let the devil steal from you what God has blessed you with. Call me on this number if you need further counselling. 08028120388. God bless you. Pst Enoch

I know you call yourself a Christian. Product of failed educational system of Nigeria.

The rest of the world will ask you to do something about, if you don't agree with the situation, except ignorant and backward Nigerians who will always complain and run away without doing anything.

starbuck:
Op... Please don't tread that path of marrying her since she is an ọsụ.... The Kings and Co that abolished it, why didn't they give out their children to the outcaste ... Your parents are your 2nd God, listen to them and have their blessings to avoid had I known...

The Afonjas are now castigating our cultures like say they don't have barbaric and devilish cultures too...

Ofu onye anaghị anụ nwaanyị n'ala Igbo.... Ọ kwa agbasia ọsọ, a gụọ mile...Rapukwa ihe ndị a na ede na foonu, ha ma e sokwa gị taa ahụhụ ha mgbe ọge na abịa..

�

pickatyou:
All of you shouting and damning the consequences, I have seen its effect o. Its like two A.S persons marrying their selves and damning the concequences, you all know how the rest goes.

I don't stand for the OSU system but will I marry one. No No No!

There are medical/scientific reasons for why two A.S. people should not marry (producing an SS child). I fail to see any such consequences for the discussion at hand.

Let me share u story from my mother's family. Her two cousins who never knew each other here met in the US, they fell in love and got married over there having two kids. They both decide to pay a visit to to Nigeria and on their arrival the couple were welcomed by their parents. At first the both parents were happy seeing them together thinking they got to discover they are from the same family in US. To their utter dismay the couple introduced themselves as husband and wife. Their parents astonishingly broke the news of how they are cousins to them,and how it is a taboo to marry one another, they went as far as saying if they do their children will die. The couple weren't bothered at all. They said that's not their problem, that the love they have for each other surpasses any taboo. Believe u me, till today they're still together, they had three more kids and their kids who are my uncles are still alive with even grandchildren self. Aside the emergence of Christianity and any other religion that can eradicate all this taboo, self believe also matter. That's how Yorubas will be saying ah! Don't marry girls from Abeokuta oo, they're this they're that. Thousands of Abeokuta women that have been the root behind their husband's success. (No be only Osu cast na Unilag cast una go see.. Mtcheeew!) If it's possible guy, abeg elope with the love of ur life, don't
Iet ur parents scatter the journey of ur life abeg.

Abort!! 123 abort!!!



Just break the news. Break it. None of you will die.

Love! Love that will disappear if you make a monumental marital mistake. So, allow that love to solemnly disappear now. That's why you are called a MAN. If you love yourself and her, let her Go since the taboo is generational. I am sure you don't want to battle three wars: from parents, your family with her if u eventually make it and the osu-caste.

The 'Osu-caste' that Adam and Eve commited long time ago still lingers hard on us.

Abi u still Wan enjoy her small ni before u japa!

Ire oo

addictiv:

And u call that a fault.... Something that my guys would die for... Regarding the op... It's a shame he has already made up his mind to succumb to family pressures n surrender his throat even before the knife has been sharpened.. Osu cast system has been abolished in Imo State and igboland at large. Anybody practicing it can be prosecuted using the appropriate channels. As for being sidelined in family meetings... Nna become a billionaire and see if they won't seek ur decision first before anyone else. Besides what really do u stand to loose? If it's family land.. U can leave them and buy your own land and build ur village house. Any family member that ll refuse to relate with you because you married her is not worth being regarded as family and should not be seen within a 100 miles of your home. I cannot rescind my decision to marry someone based on factors she never had control over. I am also from Imo state, Mbaise to be precise.

I feel you big time

Have you done genotype testing?

Now, imagine she's AS and you are AS, What will you do in this situation? #IMAGINE o...

I will like to know your answer to this please.

Christopherrrr:
Hello Nairalanders, greetings. My name is Christopher (pseudonym) from the Eastern part of the country, Imo State to be precise. I'm a man in his early 30's. I have an active account here but I had to sign-up for another account for this thread.
Please pardon my grammatical errors and blunders. MOD please help move to FP.

Few months back, I fell in love with a pretty lady with a beautiful soul. She is 28. Though we are running a long distance relationship but the current in the communication link can power Kanji Dam. Lol!! We can be on calls for hours since the very day I met her. There is a fair share of the feelings, affections, respect and regard for each other. It's not one-sided. Though we have been opportune to be together thrice since the past 10months we met. I have had plans to go about engagement and marriage arrangements this coming festive period though I haven't made this known to her.

She gives me joy, she gives me happiness, she prays for me, she blesses me. There is a part of me she unraveled that I never believed existed. Above all, she gives me peace of mind.

Fast forward to last month, I invited her to a family event. I introduced her to my family as my girlfriend. Instantly everyone fell in love with her. My mum was allover her and she was indeed up and doing. She didn't disappoint me. Not pretence, she has a good home training.

When she left same day after the event, my mum proclaimed her love for her. She said, "Olee ebe isi choota udi nwa nke a?" (Where did you find this kinda girl from?). This made me drop a tear of joy thereafter because I've always prayed for such from her any day I introduce a lady to her. This also happens to be my first time.

Fast forward again to 2weeks later, my dad requested I confirm her community and kindred properly because we happen to come from the same LGA. I didn't even know they have started making inquiries for me even before I asked them to. I confirmed from her and informed my dad. Only for them (my parents) to break the news to me days later that we can't marry from their kindred because they are regarded as Out-Casts (Osu-Cast System). Right now, I can't contend my heartbreak. I'm so devastated and confused.

This has been a long-term tradition that has been for centuries that I don't think it's in my capabilities to do away with it or do otherwise.

My problem now is how do I break the news to her for a breakup because we can't continue like this.

I have never ceased to love her less since the very day I learnt of this. In fact, she gives me reasons to love, cherish and adore her every single day. I still do that to the brim and don't have regrets. Quote me, her type is rare. I love this girl with every breath I take. I just cry myself to sleep every night after our long calls.

Please advise a brother because I'm in a deep state of dilemma.

Dump her and marry a girl ur community loves - since is your community that’s most important to you .

Christopherrrr:


It's quite unfortunate my community still takes cognizance of it.

Christopherrrr:


Braving up to bear the consequences isn't just what's involved rather it goes to the extent of affecting my entire household. No one is really gonna follow you go marry the girl in question. Secondly, we are from the same LGA so her origin won't be far fetched..

same local government but still practice OSU......Kia. This country never mature I swear....

Zikora1000:
if you are looking for someone that will give you peace of mind. come, let me show you one. her only fault, she is over 6ft tall. but nice shape humble and very pretty too.

Fault? I like tall ladies

Bros, did you just say Imo state?
Our very own Imo state?
Hope it's not Njaba/Orlu side cos there own dey Dem body.
Just waka pass o, nor even try am.
Imo wey carry Osu matter for head like gala.
The result dey dey dastardly o.

It takes more than love for a marriage to last o.
#Shalom.

Tumbulum:
OSU girls are the best bro. Bros don't miss your opportunity of your lifetime.

Na dem dey fine pass

tot:
In 2019, this is what Nigerians are still discussing.

Really depressing.

OSU in 2019.

OP you shouldn't call yourself a MAN if you can't marry who you love and damn whatever consequences that may arise. If MEN do this, then the OSU nonsense will die out.

Arrant nonsense.

This is 2019 for facks sake.

But truthfully, same thing is happening to me...

Intact I want to get her pregnant and wait for the next reaction

nanizle:


Really depressing.

OSU in 2019.

OP you shouldn't call yourself a MAN if you can't marry who you love and damn whatever consequences that may arise. If MEN do this, then the OSU nonsense will die out.

Arrant nonsense.

This is 2019 for facks sake.

I tell ya. Very unfortunate.

nunnu:
WHO PARENTAL BLESSING HELP. THE MAN MY PARENTS CHOOSE FOR ME NEARLY ENDED MY LIFE. ABEG COMMOT FOR ROAD.

Thank God you're still alive

madridsta007:


LOL. You need to calm down with the emotionalism.

Parental blessings is VERY different from a parent choosing a wife for you.
Why are people struggling with English comprehension these days?

Your parents should not choose a wife for you. And I speak as a Christian. "He who finds a wife...", not "The parents who find a wife...". They should "BLESS" the marriage. Not "Choose" the marriage. These are two different things.

I think it's clear that if they choose the person for you then they have already blessed the union. They can't pick someone for you and not bless the union, you digggg

36STATES:

I know you call yourself a Christian. Product of failed educational system of Nigeria.

The rest of the world will ask you to do something about, if you don't agree with the situation, except ignorant and backward Nigerians who will always complain and run away without doing anything.

Christianity or not, tradition is tradition mbok...

Zikora1000:
if you are looking for someone that will give you peace of mind. come, let me show you one. her only fault, she is over 6ft tall. but nice shape humble and very pretty too.

wedding planner

Jombom:
Pls provide me with her phone # if she's truly interested in a serious n sincere relationship that can lead to marriage. I am Yoruba Osu matter no concern me, in fact God punish the system self.

Bro you wicked ohhh una kill persin with laughter I laff sotee I fart

femzab:
Four years ago, I attended a wonderful marriage at ngwo, enugu. They are blessed with two kids now and enjoying their union. The guy family said no because the girl is an OSU (an outcast) and not a single member of the family attended the wedding. Today, the parent have accepted their daughter in law.
Bros it is your decision, let her go if she is not worth fighting for.
Infact for the fact that you are already thinking of the way to break up with her show that you don't deserve her love. Tell her and let her go.
After you will claim you are a Christian yet you are ruled by barbaric tradition.
How dare someone tell me I cannot marry who I want. They should be ready to lose me as a son.
Create history. Become a rally point for the change that must happen.

I'm clapping for you right now. You're a real G

Starpro87:
If Obama's daughters were Osu and they're of Nigeria origin, many would downplay it and hook them up for marriage. Believe me, no devil could stop their success. osu IS A STATE OF MIND that you can fight. You can back out if your tradition supersedes the God you believe in.

Wise words

Christopherrrr:


Nothing is absolutely wrong with me. Yes I have found love but the consequences are way far beyond me. It's not only gonna affect me alone but every other being from my father's loins. My parents will have a fair share of the consequences same is applicable to my siblings and every other person that involves themselves in a marital way with them. Honestly, I don't wish this for my worst enemy. Damning the consequences is easier said than done in this part of the world. To bad we ain't in the Western world where there is individualistic lifestyle.

if your parents are Christians it wouldn't be an issue damning the consequences, all you need is the consent of your parents. I come from a home where my dad was rejected and considered an outcast because he was a Christian, the day he was to marry all hell was let loose in the community yet he forged ahead, long story short, history was made he became a model in the community, now people embrace his pattern

Idzitari1:
Nonsense tradition, bro if actually this so call stupid osu thing is still in existence nd the government once said the abolish it, a word of advice if u trully luv this girl involve an NGO that fight against it. I guess u can do anything to save ur luv but if u can't I be KD osu we marry anything wih a V, Lol