Boys of this generation. They are thinking with their their dicks and the mindset of romantic love. They can't use common sense to get their shit together.

You have an ex right?
Now pretend that she's giving you cash and gifts
And she how she reacts..
If she's not cool with it, silently find a new girlfriend.
Break up with her in your mind
Bleep and refuse giving her a dime until she dumps you and run away..
Good luck bro

Ereolamide:
I would've advised you but you didn't indicate matured advice or response in your post.

I give matured advice only.

Hahaha... Your thoughts, too, Sir

IceColdVeins:
So what are your losses? biz cant be the only gain bro
This is a relationship dont forget
be deep

I don't think I'd lose anything so bad I can't get it from another Girl

dave4rella:

You have an ex right?
Now pretend that she's giving you cash and gifts
And she how she reacts..
If she's not cool with it, silently find a new girlfriend.
Break up with her in your mind
Bleep and refuse giving her a dime until she dumps you and run away..
Good luck bro

Bro, my business and job won't allow too many girls in my head. I need to focus. This small matter already got me so distracted I booked my Boss' flight ticket for the wrong destination today

OK bro,
Now here is my 1dollar:
If you value peace of mind over the money she rakes in.......You need to simply dump her and let her know thats the reason why you can't go on or plan for contigencies as she aint reliable(no assurance that she wont keep seeing her ex), if you can't .................
Business is enough reason to hang on with the relationship but not with her misdemeanor......you need to use your head and start planning for contigencies cos you and I know whats gonn happen when the said ex comes back (a shoulder to cry on is a dick to ride on later and okafor's law)
Firstly, you need to convince yourself that your peace of mind is paramount and supersedes any other thing in the relationship. Then please stop using money to outshine your ex, its detrimental.....You may try to diversify your business just incase she dumps you for her ex cos this may happen when they eventually fvck so that the end of the relationship wont be the end of food on your table. Save more and reduce expenses on her, she already got her ex to deal with her bills, let her keep it up. (beggars never get enough)
You should try to connect with your ex too just to give her a taste of her own medicine.... You need to do all to claim your game!
Point is....Plan for revenge and contigencies!!!


I know its not gonna be easy but time is a good weapon, the plan starts with you making up your mind.

iamadonis2:


I don't think I'd lose anything so bad I can't get it from another Girl

What led to her asking her ex for assistance? bro there is something wrong with your relationship already but if you love her so much has you claim I advise that you stop it and try to met up to your responsibility

Quality20:
guy dont make d mistake of not trusting ur girl since she isnt doing secretly, mistrust can push her into his arms just b matured and cool. nothing gonna happen bad to u or her

Which foolish mistrust??

iamadonis2:


Thanks Bro. I needed a stranger to talk to. Every other person around us feels we are a permanently happy couple.

They wouldn't understand me or they'd judge her

I'm confused why you think that it is okay? This isn't an issue to look for input. Learn to trust your judgement and instincts.

No, it’s not. She’s dating him too. How old are you young man?

NGRsenate:
Leave that girl before it’s too late!!!





I’m talking from experience. I’ve been in exactly this situation...... TWICE!!!!!

I know how difficult it may be because you really like her but killing yourself will sound sugary when you eventually find out the extent of things she has going with her ex.

If it was another random guy, ehen you can fight that fight and will most likely come out victorious but her ex?? Na bruh, it’s a lost cause.

As long as a girl is still attached to her ex, you’re just a rebound

Kai , u nailed it. I can very much relate to what u said. Drop that girl asap

iamadonis2:


I don't think I'd lose anything so bad I can't get it from another Girl

Have you tried discussing this with her? Letting her know it ain't right and kinda disrespectful to you? Communication is key. Talk to her first.

iamadonis2:



Bro, my business and job won't allow too many girls in my head. I need to focus. This small matter already got me so distracted I booked my Boss' flight ticket for the wrong destination today

Then zero your mind on love
Relate with ladies on a win win level
Once you're ready to settle down, find a Lady, give her your terms, if she's okay with it fine.
Concentrate and hustle

lyndaway:
What led to her asking her ex for assistance? bro there is something wrong with your relationship already but if you love her so much has you claim I advise that you stop it and try to met up to your responsibility

I don't understand?
His responsibility?

iamadonis2:


Bro, this shiiiiit messes with my mind. One said thing that happens is this: Most times when he gives her cash, I find myself competing unconsciously to double or triple the said sum.

It's a bad habit. And I cannot continue doing that to my pocket and mind

You double it? Does she tell you how much the ex sends to her? Receiving money from an ex isn't a bad thing but there's a clear evidence they would sleep with each other somehow somehow... Except if the guy doesn't want to but it is rare...

pocohantas:


I don't understand?
His responsibility?

Yes dear there must be something she needs that he his not meeting up to what would make his woman go seeking for assistance from her ex it not normal it either she is not contented with what she has or the guy is not capable let face it when a man gives a woman what she wants she won't go elsewhere except otherwise

lyndaway:
Yes dear there must be something she needs that he his not meeting up to what would make his woman go seeking for assistance from her ex it not normal it either she is not contented with what she has or the guy is not capable let face it when a man gives a woman what she wants she won't go elsewhere except otherwise

He doesn't have to meet up with anything. She has no right to put a young man under (financial) pressure. If she wants the good life, the one her father can't give- she should get a job. He can only assist when convenient.

-A woman who goes back to her ex every other time for assistance has no respect for her man.

-A woman who is greedy will always go elsewhere to makeup for her supposed deficit. Seeing that women are now invalids that men have to be responsible for, even in relationships.

-She isn't doing him a favour dating him, so he has no duty to prove his capability.

lyndaway:
What led to her asking her ex for assistance? bro there is something wrong with your relationship already but if you love her so much has you claim I advise that you stop it and try to met up to your responsibility

Thank God. Finally an input from a female. So this isn't a one-time thing. She always requests. I believe the ex is what you'd call a mugu.

And she's really exploiting that

AwkaetitiBabe:
Have you tried discussing this with her? Letting her know it ain't right and kinda disrespectful to you? Communication is key. Talk to her first.

I won't lie to you. We always have this talk. No change. No change at all.

pocohantas:


He doesn't have to meet up with anything. She has no right to put a young man under (financial) pressure. If she wants the good life, the one her father can't give- she should get a job. He can only assist when convenient.

-A woman who goes back to her ex every other time tor assistance has no respect for her man.

-A woman who is greedy will always go elsewhere to makeup for her supposed deficit. Seeing that women are now invalids that men have to be responsible for, even in relationships.

-She isn't doing him a favour dating him, so he has no duty to prove his capability.

Poco are you the one saying this ??

I’m in a car right now while typing this, you’ve got excuse my typography errors. Bro I understand what you feeling and passing through at the moment. But the whole truth is that you’ve got to be a man and consider these two things.1 to remain in the relationship and see your joy and happiness dry away or 2. You’ve got to walk away from it and save yourself from unnecessary issues... I know and understand it’s never easy to walk away especially when you truly love the so said lady... you’ve got some decisions to make now. Regards!!! Mr. Sucsex

pocohantas:


I don't understand?
His responsibility?

I'm peeking from behind you Poko. Needed female perspectives

pocohantas:


He doesn't have to meet up with anything. She has no right to put a young man under (financial) pressure. If she wants the good life, the one her father can't give- she should get a job. He can only assist when convenient.

-A woman who goes back to her ex every other time tor assistance has no respect for her man.

-A woman who is greedy will always go elsewhere to makeup for her supposed deficit. Seeing that women are now invalids that men have to be responsible for, even in relationships.

-She isn't doing him a favour dating him, so he has no duty to prove his capability.

Not true. If I remeber from novels, once you save a Japanese person's life you are responsible for that person. For naija once you knack a chick you are automatically responsible for her welfare.

_{I am being sarcastic}

iamadonis2:


I won't lie to you. We always have this talk. No change. No change at all.

She tells u each time she asks him for money?

Anyways, she'll probably fall on his D when he's back. She should learn to be contented with the money from u and una business

ornicus:


Not true. If I remeber from novels, once you save a Japanese person's life you are responsible for that person. For naija once you knack a chick you are automatically responsible for her welfare.

That is bullcrap. I wonder how they pick their gfs. I have been with someone who earned my salary in hrs and he never had my acct number. There were gifts, outings, food...but no RESPONSIBILITY. These chicks do not know that, when you make yourself his RESPONSIBILITY - you slowly begin to wear him out. He is human after all. But when you do your best for yourself, he will be moved to please you in different ways. Except he is an efulefu...

AwkaetitiBabe:
She tells u each time she asks him for money?

Anyways, she'll probably fall on his D when he's back. She should learn to be contented with the money from u and una business

No, she doesn't. Once in a while I'm with her phone and a "come and take" notification pops up. Or I snoop around and see a "can you help?" Message

pocohantas:


That is bullcrap. I wonder how they pick their gfs. I have been with someone who earned my salary in hrs and he never had my acct number. There were gifts, outings, food...but no RESPONSIBILITY. These chicks do not know that, when you make yourself his RESPONSIBILITY - you slowly begin to wear him off. He is human after all. But when you do your best for yourself, he will be moved to please you in different ways. Except he is an efulefu...

I was being sarcastic

pocolee....I smell sense all over u

pocohantas:


That is bullcrap. I wonder how they pick their gfs. I have been with someone who earned my salary in hrs and he never had my acct number. There were gifts, outings, food...but no RESPONSIBILITY. These chicks do not know that, when you make yourself his RESPONSIBILITY - you slowly begin to wear him off. He is human after all. But when you do your best for yourself, he will be moved to please you in different ways. Except he is an efulefu...

i wonder ooo

AstroG:





Poco are you the one saying this ??

pocohantas:


That is bullcrap. I wonder how they pick their gfs. I have been with someone who earned my salary in hrs and he never had my acct number. There were gifts, outings, food...but no RESPONSIBILITY. These chicks do not know that, when you make yourself his RESPONSIBILITY - you slowly begin to wear him off. He is human after all. But when you do your best for yourself, he will be moved to please you in different ways. Except he is an efulefu...

You always forget though, you are 1. Which is 1.00000000% of 200Million people. As far as Nigerians are concerned, when you starting dating a girl, she is your responsibility. In my office, I asked this question last month, 2 married women supported that "It's the Boyfriend job to take care of the lady in a relationship". One even said, She met her husband in a Bus & If her husband hadn't paid her T-Fare, she wouldn't have even answered him.

Except maybe you're not knacking her, once knacking enter. Na to carry your load oh, It's to add her to your payslip jejely. HR will do the subtraction.

ornicus:


I was being sarcastic

I know you were, I just addressed it generally. Lots of them reason like that and they are not even being sarcastic.

It is not proper but it doesn't automatically translate into infidelity.

2 things -
1. someone had told you to tell her that you got some help from your ex-girlfriend and watch her reaction. I guess that will give you an insight into her mindset about having an ex help out financially. And maybe that's what she's doing.

2. What type of help us she getting from the ex? Is she hiding it? Is she asking for help about basic day to day living or is it about one off events?

It's ok to seek help once in a while (from whoever and in a transparent manner) but a woman that can not live within her (and her husband/partner's) means will expose herself to sexually inappropriate advances. Problem is that she may not always be able to overcome all the advances.