Bro don't get depressed,God has a different.plan for your life.The fact of life is that it does not mean that.if they finish university before you they will get a better job than you.Don't.look at another person run your own race,it is obvious that you are.an intelligent person because pharmacy is not a small course.to study.

Then talk to someone who you know that you mum respect his/her views to talk to your mum on her comments towards you and how it affects you psychologically.

You and your mum don't even know what life is all about.

I finished serving this country at the age of 33.Don't ask me how I made it since NYSC age limit is 30.

Guy you are not doing bad for yourself .It is like your mum don't even like you.

I am 38 now.I have a job.I have a wife ,son and bet9ja is paying heavily

donbachi:
U and ur mother no serious...pikin no go school wahala,pikin try go,him go late...some people prayed to study pharmacy like u are doing today,after writing jamb for 5years,but ended up studying agric economics.what is 7years...do u even know d number of youths praying for such?..abeg make I hear words...2moro na ur mama go dance pass u wey go d school..she will be going around telling people "my daughter is a pharmacist" both who ask her and who no ask her...may GOD see u thru in Jesus name and graduate in flying colours.

You need an informed mindset to be able to handle the unnecessary comparison your mum is doing. Very unwise and an ignorant way to handle a child.

For you, just calm down each time she goes into the comparison business again. Gently explain why you appreciate their efforts in raising you and your siblings if you have any, and that these pressure on them will soon be over.

Another wise step you should take is to look for a side biz you can engage in during this period of your schooling, this will bring relief to some extent for your parents. Don't get carried away by pressure from runs ladies. Regrets awaits such people.

Mtchewww
Almost everyone faced the same thing.
Go out there and do great things. She will change her tune later.
She is just worried about you and want you to do great things. Some people are weird like that.

@OP, life's race is an individual one. I got my first REAL job eight years after my NYSC, in that time some of my high school mates that gained admission in my final year to study medicine were about concluding their programs.
I am still on course though, as an ICT head of an International coy which I know is definitely no where near the DESTINATION I planned. Young man, run your race with zeal and gusto and let God do the rest.

iaamxavier:
I'm writing this post with a heavy heart

So I'm 21 and I finished secondary school at age 17 (2015) and to be honest I just got admission this year to study pharmacy while my mates are in their final year and it hurts alot because my mum keeps telling me that my cousin is in final year and is about serving next year and I'm just gaining admission to a university, she even uses her friend's child as an example and it made me go into a Little depression, I actually felt sad because for the first time a comparison actually hit me...

She claims they (my parents)are supposed to be resting and not paying school fee. That I'm stressing them and ever since I was a teenager I always vowed that I wanted to leave my father house before 25yrs of age

Now I'm studying a 5 years course (7 years to become a full graduate) and by then I'll be 28 I actually feel ashamed because this isn't what I wanted since I left secondary school
I wanted to finish on time and remove the burden from them

I've never failed jamb, my least Score was 245 but circumstances kept dragging me back

I finished my ND program in 2017 (Distinction in SLT Yabatech)

So it feels more like I'm parambulating up and down and don't know what I want for my self but I actually do!!

I need an advice or something to make me feel better or confident about my self

Most mothers tend to adopt this silly attitude every now & then.

My mum did the same to me.

But the end will tell bro.

I'm a successful graduate now & I earn more than my so called mates that were far ahead of me.

Stay optimistic & ignore her nagging attitude bro

The end will tell

ambitiouschap:
we are in the same condition, even mine is worse cos I have not gained admission, leave secondary school at 16. I even slept with tears last night, but I am trying to get money ooo, even are those who graduated not the one complaining here everyday.

me I dey try kdp, forex, even I don own sport blog , my topic just reach front page now ( villa retirement) . see everyone with their own time , don't be depressed .

keep up the hustle

my dear, Calm down, people, family and parents will always talk, it's normal in this African setting to compare,
let me tell you, m been compared everyday that it's become a hearsay and a motivation to what I want to be.. at the long run they will be proud of your sanding against all talks and odds. You are You, pls be you...

iaamxavier:
I'm writing this post with a heavy heart

So I'm 21 and I finished secondary school at age 17 (2015) and to be honest I just got admission this year to study pharmacy while my mates are in their final year and it hurts alot because my mum keeps telling me that my cousin is in final year and is about serving next year and I'm just gaining admission to a university, she even uses her friend's child as an example and it made me go into a Little depression, I actually felt sad because for the first time a comparison actually hit me...

She claims they (my parents)are supposed to be resting and not paying school fee. That I'm stressing them and ever since I was a teenager I always vowed that I wanted to leave my father house before 25yrs of age

Now I'm studying a 5 years course (7 years to become a full graduate) and by then I'll be 28 I actually feel ashamed because this isn't what I wanted since I left secondary school
I wanted to finish on time and remove the burden from them

I've never failed jamb, my least Score was 245 but circumstances kept dragging me back

I finished my ND program in 2017 (Distinction in SLT Yabatech)

So it feels more like I'm parambulating up and down and don't know what I want for my self but I actually do!!

I need an advice or something to make me feel better or confident about my self

This are the questions i will like you to ask your mum;
1. Is she God that created you?
2. Was she there when God created you?
3. Did you and her friend child choose the same destiny from heaven?
your decision is in your hand ignore all those statement, they are mere side attractions, focus on your journey, before you know it you, are done. there are many of your mates who graduated at the age of 21, are also wandering around on the street, yet to figure out how to put things together for their selves... When it's God appointed time for man, the table will surely turn.

Just be focused and don't mind the comparison between you and your cousin, it's well, God's time is the best, don't be surprised the delay is for your own benefit.

iaamxavier:
I'm writing this post with a heavy heart

So I'm 21 and I finished secondary school at age 17 (2015) and to be honest I just got admission this year to study pharmacy while my mates are in their final year and it hurts alot because my mum keeps telling me that my cousin is in final year and is about serving next year and I'm just gaining admission to a university, she even uses her friend's child as an example and it made me go into a Little depression, I actually felt sad because for the first time a comparison actually hit me...

She claims they (my parents)are supposed to be resting and not paying school fee. That I'm stressing them and ever since I was a teenager I always vowed that I wanted to leave my father house before 25yrs of age

Now I'm studying a 5 years course (7 years to become a full graduate) and by then I'll be 28 I actually feel ashamed because this isn't what I wanted since I left secondary school
I wanted to finish on time and remove the burden from them

I've never failed jamb, my least Score was 245 but circumstances kept dragging me back

I finished my ND program in 2017 (Distinction in SLT Yabatech)

So it feels more like I'm parambulating up and down and don't know what I want for my self but I actually do!!

I need an advice or something to make me feel better or confident about my self

I completely understand what you're going through.

Same thing happened to me some years back, only difference was that it came from one of my siblings

See bro, you have to be strong at heart and focused on the program you want to pursue, it would not be easy but you have to brace up to the comments. Nothing hurts more than family saying things that cuts deeper.

I'm about to graduate (early next year) and I wouldn't want to be under anyone anymore.

Forget your cousins and relatives who are doing well, just live your life within the context that you understand and can sustain.

You have to start looking for means of sustaining yourself because she may start torturing you before funding your education.

Get some skills and and assist yourself as well.

It will be hard but your skills will ameliorate the suffering you'd experience.

iaamxavier:
I'm writing this post with a heavy heart

So I'm 21 and I finished secondary school at age 17 (2015) and to be honest I just got admission this year to study pharmacy while my mates are in their final year and it hurts alot because my mum keeps telling me that my cousin is in final year and is about serving next year and I'm just gaining admission to a university, she even uses her friend's child as an example and it made me go into a Little depression, I actually felt sad because for the first time a comparison actually hit me...

She claims they (my parents)are supposed to be resting and not paying school fee. That I'm stressing them and ever since I was a teenager I always vowed that I wanted to leave my father house before 25yrs of age

Now I'm studying a 5 years course (7 years to become a full graduate) and by then I'll be 28 I actually feel ashamed because this isn't what I wanted since I left secondary school
I wanted to finish on time and remove the burden from them

I've never failed jamb, my least Score was 245 but circumstances kept dragging me back

I finished my ND program in 2017 (Distinction in SLT Yabatech)

So it feels more like I'm parambulating up and down and don't know what I want for my self but I actually do!!

I need an advice or something to make me feel better or confident about my self

u are a fool my dear for allowing ur illitrate of a mother feel depress. Focus on ur studies and leav her alone.

For every time she names people to compare your progress with, also remind her of some that are not alive today or those that are behind.

The only person you should be in competition with is yourself. Never ever allow anyone to make you feel unaccomplished.

My dear Op, please i beg of you do keep your focus o, keep the star soaring as you have always been a star. i bet you by the time they start seeing that star shinning they will come to celebrate you, you will become there special one. you know, our parents can be insensitive at time, i beg just keep flying high, God bless you.

iaamxavier:
I'm writing this post with a heavy heart

So I'm 21 and I finished secondary school at age 17 (2015) and to be honest I just got admission this year to study pharmacy while my mates are in their final year and it hurts alot because my mum keeps telling me that my cousin is in final year and is about serving next year and I'm just gaining admission to a university, she even uses her friend's child as an example and it made me go into a Little depression, I actually felt sad because for the first time a comparison actually hit me...

She claims they (my parents)are supposed to be resting and not paying school fee. That I'm stressing them and ever since I was a teenager I always vowed that I wanted to leave my father house before 25yrs of age

Now I'm studying a 5 years course (7 years to become a full graduate) and by then I'll be 28 I actually feel ashamed because this isn't what I wanted since I left secondary school
I wanted to finish on time and remove the burden from them

I've never failed jamb, my least Score was 245 but circumstances kept dragging me back

I finished my ND program in 2017 (Distinction in SLT Yabatech)

So it feels more like I'm parambulating up and down and don't know what I want for my self but I actually do!!

I need an advice or something to make me feel better or confident about my self

Bro, don't let that bother you. Main reason she's complaining is because of the financial implications.

Here's what you MUST DO.

Take advantage of all scholarship opportunities you come across in school... Agbami, Shell and others.. No Dull ooo.

I know people who lived off of students scholarship, buying laptops and had 300k savings as at graduation.

Once you stop Calling home for money, dem go respect you die. My mom thought I was into Yahoo back then.

Cheers up bro. And no follow Toto when you reach school, else, oyo na your case.
( This doesn't include Otedola kind Toto Sha.)

anochuko01:
I hate bad energy, and I do away with them sharply without caring where it's coming from.

Cox I refused to serve, my dad started acting funny. I simply put him on one side.... It got to a point he reported me to my siblings.

My advice for you though is to face your life, get the little help you can get from them Cox is their responsibility and you didn't beg them to born You.

However, channel your anger into seeing that you succeed in school and life. Start looking for little ways to make money. A similar experience from my mum made me define at 21yrs the type of life I wanted.

Channel Your anger into a winning spirit.

So, there are people like this on NL. You guys are great.

sorry encourage yourself my mom has told me worst things than that.there was a day I almost committed suicide . thank God I now live far from my family members

Nna calm down!





My baby jes gained admission at 24

iaamxavier:
I'm writing this post with a heavy heart

So I'm 21 and I finished secondary school at age 17 (2015) and to be honest I just got admission this year to study pharmacy while my mates are in their final year and it hurts alot because my mum keeps telling me that my cousin is in final year and is about serving next year and I'm just gaining admission to a university, she even uses her friend's child as an example and it made me go into a Little depression, I actually felt sad because for the first time a comparison actually hit me...

She claims they (my parents)are supposed to be resting and not paying school fee. That I'm stressing them and ever since I was a teenager I always vowed that I wanted to leave my father house before 25yrs of age

Now I'm studying a 5 years course (7 years to become a full graduate) and by then I'll be 28 I actually feel ashamed because this isn't what I wanted since I left secondary school
I wanted to finish on time and remove the burden from them

I've never failed jamb, my least Score was 245 but circumstances kept dragging me back

I finished my ND program in 2017 (Distinction in SLT Yabatech)

So it feels more like I'm parambulating up and down and don't know what I want for my self but I actually do!!

I need an advice or something to make me feel better or confident about my self

Some mothers can be very terrible. I also faced similar thing when I finished and had no job. She started comparing me to all her friends that have gotten a job and how they are married and taking care of their parents. Single advice or encouragement she never gave.. all she does everyday was to remind me of my past and make it really hurt me. She wasn't even reminding me to encourage me with it. She was always running it on my face and made sure I got hurt from it. That really made me develop some level of hatred for her. Finally I got a good job and next was to start insulting me with marriage. Always reminding and insulting me how her friends kids are married with kids and that I had no shame .


Thank God for life today,

DonBenny77:
Your own better na, you never hear people story. In this country veterans still living with their parents is a normal phenomenon these days. Only 21 she dey complain.
You for just dey laugh your Mama.
If you like go and kill yourself, them go carry your body go police station......

wicked but candid advice


In short. Time will save you. Go get yiur degree.

if u ask me, I will advise u to go for ur HND in SLT, SLT is far better than the so called pharmacy u are going to waste ur five years on....

TechCapon:
are you a CCNA or CCNP?

CCNP, I'm actually preparing for my CCIE LAB, but yet to get a date in dubai.. Everything is booked

Sorry about how you feel... I'll share my story, so you can be motivated!

It begins........ So, it took me 6 years after secondary school to go for my first degree not because I wasn't brilliant but "circumstances beyond my control".

Finally got admission at the age of 22 into Yabatech, Biz Adm & finished with an Upper Credit. I didn't stop there, gained Admission for HND to the same school but opted to acquire a B.Sc degree as I observed the discrimination level between HND/B.Sc when I was doing my Industrial trainee with GTB after my ND.

Gained admission for my B.sc. at 26 years (direct entry though & distance learning) as I got a great job after my ND & still on the same job, promoted once too. I finished at the Age of 29 with a Second Class Upper Credit too. Married at 28 years & blessed with a Child already!

I am yet to begin a Master's degree because I am yet to decide on my career path & which direction I wish to focus on for Masters.

Ps: You can do it once you commit your heart to it & DELAY IS NOT DENIAL. It is well Dear..........

iaamxavier:
I'm writing this post with a heavy heart

So I'm 21 and I finished secondary school at age 17 (2015) and to be honest I just got admission this year to study pharmacy while my mates are in their final year and it hurts alot because my mum keeps telling me that my cousin is in final year and is about serving next year and I'm just gaining admission to a university, she even uses her friend's child as an example and it made me go into a Little depression, I actually felt sad because for the first time a comparison actually hit me...

She claims they (my parents)are supposed to be resting and not paying school fee. That I'm stressing them and ever since I was a teenager I always vowed that I wanted to leave my father house before 25yrs of age

Now I'm studying a 5 years course (7 years to become a full graduate) and by then I'll be 28 I actually feel ashamed because this isn't what I wanted since I left secondary school
I wanted to finish on time and remove the burden from them

I've never failed jamb, my least Score was 245 but circumstances kept dragging me back

I finished my ND program in 2017 (Distinction in SLT Yabatech)

So it feels more like I'm parambulating up and down and don't know what I want for my self but I actually do!!

I need an advice or something to make me feel better or confident about my self

Don't b depressed bro, I graduated at 27 bt today..... presently on PhD n my parents on my payroll.

iaamxavier:
I'm writing this post with a heavy heart

So I'm 21 and I finished secondary school at age 17 (2015) and to be honest I just got admission this year to study pharmacy while my mates are in their final year and it hurts alot because my mum keeps telling me that my cousin is in final year and is about serving next year and I'm just gaining admission to a university, she even uses her friend's child as an example and it made me go into a Little depression, I actually felt sad because for the first time a comparison actually hit me...

She claims they (my parents)are supposed to be resting and not paying school fee. That I'm stressing them and ever since I was a teenager I always vowed that I wanted to leave my father house before 25yrs of age

Now I'm studying a 5 years course (7 years to become a full graduate) and by then I'll be 28 I actually feel ashamed because this isn't what I wanted since I left secondary school
I wanted to finish on time and remove the burden from them

I've never failed jamb, my least Score was 245 but circumstances kept dragging me back

I finished my ND program in 2017 (Distinction in SLT Yabatech)

So it feels more like I'm parambulating up and down and don't know what I want for my self but I actually do!!

I need an advice or something to make me feel better or confident about my self

There is time for everything and everyone. Yoruba say, Aimo asiko lo da mu e da..

Please babe, if you are not comfortable there, you can come over to my place ok.

iaamxavier:
I'm writing this post with a heavy heart

So I'm 21 and I finished secondary school at age 17 (2015) and to be honest I just got admission this year to study pharmacy while my mates are in their final year and it hurts alot because my mum keeps telling me that my cousin is in final year and is about serving next year and I'm just gaining admission to a university, she even uses her friend's child as an example and it made me go into a Little depression, I actually felt sad because for the first time a comparison actually hit me...

She claims they (my parents)are supposed to be resting and not paying school fee. That I'm stressing them and ever since I was a teenager I always vowed that I wanted to leave my father house before 25yrs of age

Now I'm studying a 5 years course (7 years to become a full graduate) and by then I'll be 28 I actually feel ashamed because this isn't what I wanted since I left secondary school
I wanted to finish on time and remove the burden from them

I've never failed jamb, my least Score was 245 but circumstances kept dragging me back

I finished my ND program in 2017 (Distinction in SLT Yabatech)

So it feels more like I'm parambulating up and down and don't know what I want for my self but I actually do!!

I need an advice or something to make me feel better or confident about my self

But when she is old age will.not say that rubbish.

iaamxavier:
I'm writing this post with a heavy heart

So I'm 21 and I finished secondary school at age 17 (2015) and to be honest I just got admission this year to study pharmacy while my mates are in their final year and it hurts alot because my mum keeps telling me that my cousin is in final year and is about serving next year and I'm just gaining admission to a university, she even uses her friend's child as an example and it made me go into a Little depression, I actually felt sad because for the first time a comparison actually hit me...

She claims they (my parents)are supposed to be resting and not paying school fee. That I'm stressing them and ever since I was a teenager I always vowed that I wanted to leave my father house before 25yrs of age

Now I'm studying a 5 years course (7 years to become a full graduate) and by then I'll be 28 I actually feel ashamed because this isn't what I wanted since I left secondary school
I wanted to finish on time and remove the burden from them

I've never failed jamb, my least Score was 245 but circumstances kept dragging me back

I finished my ND program in 2017 (Distinction in SLT Yabatech)

So it feels more like I'm parambulating up and down and don't know what I want for my self but I actually do!!

I need an advice or something to make me feel better or confident about my self

Guy...forget all this comparison and worrying...see God knows how he arranges paroles..
he knows how he repays lost time and season....let me tell u a short story....
When I graduated my friend ddnt get a job while I immediately got one in just 2weeks...he was at home for 4years plus....then one strange luck came on him...he applied for a Masters by research position in molecular biology only for the supervisor to tell him his grades are good enuf for a PhD... that he should draft a good research proposal..and he would follow up for him with the funding committee....

long story short that’s how my guy became a doctor this July.....unless u are dipping ur hands into evil, but if u know u are a good person serving God.. dude relax....sun wey show himself for day time go gentle for moon when night come

iaamxavier:
I'm writing this post with a heavy heart

So I'm 21 and I finished secondary school at age 17 (2015) and to be honest I just got admission this year to study pharmacy while my mates are in their final year and it hurts alot because my mum keeps telling me that my cousin is in final year and is about serving next year and I'm just gaining admission to a university, she even uses her friend's child as an example and it made me go into a Little depression, I actually felt sad because for the first time a comparison actually hit me...

She claims they (my parents)are supposed to be resting and not paying school fee. That I'm stressing them and ever since I was a teenager I always vowed that I wanted to leave my father house before 25yrs of age

Now I'm studying a 5 years course (7 years to become a full graduate) and by then I'll be 28 I actually feel ashamed because this isn't what I wanted since I left secondary school
I wanted to finish on time and remove the burden from them

I've never failed jamb, my least Score was 245 but circumstances kept dragging me back

I finished my ND program in 2017 (Distinction in SLT Yabatech)

So it feels more like I'm parambulating up and down and don't know what I want for my self but I actually do!!

I need an advice or something to make me feel better or confident about my self

OP, don't worry, everything will be fine. I had same experience and I must confess it sucked then.

I never knew God's plan for me. I sat at home for 7yrs despite passing JAMB severally.....Couldn't secure admission. I had to go for IJMBE and passed with 13 points yet couldn't secure admission.

I remember clearly when I went to ABU, zaria (2003) to struggle for admission, and maneuvered my way to the office of the academic secretary then (which is the admissions officer) to plead with him and he sounded a clear warning saying : YOUNG MAN LEAVE MY OFFICE , THIS SCHOOL IS NOT FOR SOUTHERNERS. I wept that day because I saw northerners with 3 points gaining admission and screaming allah akhbar at the main gate.

At a time , I threw away my WAEC and IJMBE cert when I was rejected at common Caritas University Enugu just because I'm from Delta State. The excuse was that Deltans usually engage in cult activities. That really hit the limit for me , I couldn't take it no more so I threw my certificates away on my way back to Lagos. Someone picked them up, saw my dad's mobile number written on the file and called him. My dad arranged for them to be posted to Lagos. That was how I got the docs back.

I finally secured admission, but I really put my family through hell. Tuition was really expensive and I felt bad and selfish but God was merciful and saw me through school. I channelled that anger towards my studies and made good grades.

Today, my story is different. So many of my age grade secured admission before me and at the so called right time but cannot come close to places I have access to. I've travelled to so many countries to the extent that I'm tired of travelling. I really thank God for his mercies.

As the for B.B Msheltlila (not sure of the spelling) the then academic secretary of ABU, Zaria (2003) that threw me out of his office, I have no grudge towards you, you prepared me for greater me.

To the OP, stay strong. You're being prepared for a greater you, channel this pain and anger towards your studies, pray , stay positive and watch your dreams come through.

Your mum is actually telling you to get married so that your husband will be the one to sponsor you in school

iaamxavier:
I'm writing this post with a heavy heart

So I'm 21 and I finished secondary school at age 17 (2015) and to be honest I just got admission this year to study pharmacy while my mates are in their final year and it hurts alot because my mum keeps telling me that my cousin is in final year and is about serving next year and I'm just gaining admission to a university, she even uses her friend's child as an example and it made me go into a Little depression, I actually felt sad because for the first time a comparison actually hit me...

She claims they (my parents)are supposed to be resting and not paying school fee. That I'm stressing them and ever since I was a teenager I always vowed that I wanted to leave my father house before 25yrs of age

Now I'm studying a 5 years course (7 years to become a full graduate) and by then I'll be 28 I actually feel ashamed because this isn't what I wanted since I left secondary school
I wanted to finish on time and remove the burden from them

I've never failed jamb, my least Score was 245 but circumstances kept dragging me back

I finished my ND program in 2017 (Distinction in SLT Yabatech)

So it feels more like I'm parambulating up and down and don't know what I want for my self but I actually do!!

I need an advice or something to make me feel better or confident about my self

I am so sorry OP.
I am currently in school and I know a lot of pharmacy students. Pharmacy is really a hectic course but if you do well, you can grow with it.

I don't know if it's possible at your side but here in Uniport, some pharmacy students are making money in school.
Some:
1. Learnt photography and snap students in their birthdays and other times
2. Read books so that they can tutor others and help others do their assignment for small money
3. Blogged about their days in school and other experiences.

You can also think of more ways to make money while in school. This'll reduce how much you rely on your parents and it'll reduce insult. Stay strong

Sorry to hear your plight, but pls dont mind your mum, the earlier africa parents realize the best gift a child can give his or her parent is peace of mind the better. As parents, eating the fruit of labour on children start from the peace the child gives u... No police or hospital case for her on your behalf as a troublesome child... she is not just reasonable in this your matter....

First of all if she says things like what u have stated, try and let her know u thank God for your life, because so many of your age mate are in the hospital bedridden with sickness, some are in jail and some are drug addict with no meaningful life.
There are so many of your age who lack vision, and there are many who got admitted into the Uni at younger age but died as a result of joining bad gang, youthful exuberance and so on.... Some even died in their final year or on their way to or from youth service...

Now all u have to do is never to be depressed and just take your mum utterances as if she never said that...ojulopesi, before u know it now, 7 years will be over. Just focus on your studies and picture it this way that if u add the remaining 3 years of buhari government to another 4 years of the incoming president after buhari, by then u must have been a graduate... May God grant u good health to achieve your academic goals... Shalom