24kmagic:
I visited my sister recently and where she lives, there's this couple. The husband of that lady is the most useless husband alive. From sunrise to sun set, he'll be inside the room with this heat lying down like a log of wood. The wife will be the one to go out and hustle. This woman takes every rubbish this man throws at her and none of her siblings is aware. She praises him among her siblings and they respect him. But the man is an asshole. The only thing is that he's not violent. He's just useless. When I inquired about this lady to understand why she's enduring all these, I got to understand that she's from a troubled family. Her parents kept breeding children without plans for them. The father gave birth to ten children although two died. They didn't have the best of lives growing up. Their family house is nothing to right home about. In fact, the sisters are also hoping to get married in order to leave that house. This lady can't go back to face the troubles her sisters are trying to run away from. In fact, they are looking up to her. This is just one example out of many in this part of the country. There are so many of such troubled families across 9ja.

Marrying a girl from that family will be of great advantage to you I swear. The reason is because she'll do everything possible to remain married in order not to end up like her siblings. She'll endure every rubbish you throw at her because if she remembers that her father's house is not any better, she'll mellow. She'll want to be the only difference among the girls in the family.

OP, if the present one is a good girl, marry her. She'll make sure your children dont end up like her siblings.

There are some families you marry from and you can't tell the girl rubbish cos you know where you took her from. Whereas there are other families where you'll insult your father-in-law and your wife will still be the one to beg you just to stay in your house.

tonididdy:
I have had this trend also until I met my current gf and she kinda different.

Same poor background but not extremely because her parents are hard working. Her mum is industrious and her father for an 'urhobo man' is extraordinarily hard working.

When she visits me she buys me snacks and doesn't disturb for money.

I love her, she's a keeper so far so good....

tonididdy:
I have had this trend also until I met my current gf and she kinda different.

Same poor background but not extremely because her parents are hard working. Her mum is industrious and her father for an 'urhobo man' is extraordinarily hard working.

When she visits me she buys me snacks and doesn't disturb for money.

I love her, she's a keeper so far so good....

creolehunt:
I just thought about the girls I've been with and noticed a certain trend. This isn't even about the girls themselves who are excellent human beings, but their families.

First girl I dated revealed to me that the dad died of suspected poisoning and her family were chased out of the family house. Her eldest brother is an area boy while it seems things aren't working out for her other siblings.

The next ones dad was late too, one of her sisters is separated from her husband while the first son of nearly 40 has nothing doing.

The other ones history is that her dad is late too. The eldest sister is cohabiting with a man. They have 2 kids already without being married. Her other sisters bride price was just paid after having 3 kids with a man.

For the other one, her dad is late too, died quite early. The eldest sister is in her 30s and unmarried. Her other sister has 3kids for a man who she isn't married to and now they are separated. Things aren't just working for her people.

The one I just met recently told me her parents are late. Lost both of them to suspected poisoning within the space of one year.

I keep wondering if this is some sort of coincidence.

J111333:
Some people are made to be lanterns everywhere they go and for a lantern to be useful, it has to be in the dark.

You may be a lantern to the family of a lady somewhere but in whatever you do, don't overburden yourself. Just do your part and only what you can.

Good luck.

1stola:
I said it! D O L T Has exhausted his prescription...

em527:
wisdom is not far from you...not like this first person that commented who sounded stupid thinking he made some sense

24kmagic:
I visited my sister recently and where she lives, there's this couple. The husband of that lady is the most useless husband alive. From sunrise to sun set, he'll be inside the room with this heat lying down like a log of wood. The wife will be the one to go out and hustle. This woman takes every rubbish this man throws at her and none of her siblings is aware. She praises him among her siblings and they respect him. But the man is an asshole. The only thing is that he's not violent. He's just useless. When I inquired about this lady to understand why she's enduring all these, I got to understand that she's from a troubled family. Her parents kept breeding children without plans for them. The father gave birth to ten children although two died. They didn't have the best of lives growing up. Their family house is nothing to right home about. In fact, the sisters are also hoping to get married in order to leave that house. This lady can't go back to face the troubles her sisters are trying to run away from. In fact, they are looking up to her. This is just one example out of many in this part of the country. There are so many of such troubled families across 9ja.

Marrying a girl from that family will be of great advantage to you I swear. The reason is because she'll do everything possible to remain married in order not to end up like her siblings. She'll endure every rubbish you throw at her because if she remembers that her father's house is not any better, she'll mellow. She'll want to be the only difference among the girls in the family.

OP, if the present one is a good girl, marry her. She'll make sure your children dont end up like her siblings.

There are some families you marry from and you can't tell the girl rubbish cos you know where you took her from. Whereas there are other families where you'll insult your father-in-law and your wife will still be the one to beg you just to stay in your house.

Tripitaka:
Have you dated a girl who is a product of incest?
Have you dated a girl whose brother raped the mother for ritual purposes?
Have you dated a girl who grew up to find out that her actual dad is the family driver, but the pregnancy was passed on to the "willing dad"?
Have you dated a girl whose own father has been sexually abusing?
Have you dated a girl whose mother's nude pictures are all over the internet because she was caught shoplifting?

I believe your answer would be "No", as you would have included these in your narrative.

The families in your narrative can hardly be classed as "troubled" as I would like to think that your experiences are the peculiarities of your average Nigerian family. The average Nigerian family where diabolism and fetishism is real; where cohabitation is in vogue because the government outlaws abortion and your parents would insist on you living with the man who impregnated you even if he has no interest in marrying you; where young widows are still oppressed by their late husband's relatives; where poverty and unemployment is the norm hence a 40yr old unemployed man is nothing out of the ordinary.

The women you have been with are not from troubled families, at least in my opinion. They are simply from Nigerian families.

Tripitaka:
Have you dated a girl who is a product of incest?
Have you dated a girl whose brother raped the mother for ritual purposes?
Have you dated a girl who grew up to find out that her actual dad is the family driver, but the pregnancy was passed on to the "willing dad"?
Have you dated a girl whose own father has been sexually abusing?
Have you dated a girl whose mother's nude pictures are all over the internet because she was caught shoplifting?

I believe your answer would be "No", as you would have included these in your narrative.

The families in your narrative can hardly be classed as "troubled" as I would like to think that your experiences are the peculiarities of your average Nigerian family. The average Nigerian family where diabolism and fetishism is real; where cohabitation is in vogue because the government outlaws abortion and your parents would insist on you living with the man who impregnated you even if he has no interest in marrying you; where young widows are still oppressed by their late husband's relatives; where poverty and unemployment is the norm hence a 40yr old unemployed man is nothing out of the ordinary.

The women you have been with are not from troubled families, at least in my opinion. They are simply from Nigerian families.

creolehunt:
I just thought about the girls I've been with and noticed a certain trend. This isn't even about the girls themselves who are excellent human beings, but their families.

First girl I dated revealed to me that the dad died of suspected poisoning and her family were chased out of the family house. Her eldest brother is an area boy while it seems things aren't working out for her other siblings.

The next ones dad was late too, one of her sisters is separated from her husband while the first son of nearly 40 has nothing doing.

The other ones history is that her dad is late too. The eldest sister is cohabiting with a man. They have 2 kids already without being married. Her other sisters bride price was just paid after having 3 kids with a man.

For the other one, her dad is late too, died quite early. The eldest sister is in her 30s and unmarried. Her other sister has 3kids for a man who she isn't married to and now they are separated. Things aren't just working for her people.

The one I just met recently told me her parents are late. Lost both of them to suspected poisoning within the space of one year.

I keep wondering if this is some sort of coincidence.

CHOPbeating:
You are a healer, but healers of your type of calling may suffer serious set-backs because of those you're destined to heal. If you don't do so, you're likely to suffer in the end.

The road I see before you is very tough. If you run away from them and run to those you think are not troubled,,, that means you are about to start your own new generation of troubles.

Solution: You need to go extra-miles to consult the God of your own destiny. Offer your pure sacrifices as it may be demanded (this is not same as juju/dark powers --- be wise).

Be conscious of your revelations (they usually come to you).
You won't deny that you have your own troubles too in your family.
You equally have mad characters and you're well-known (you need to expunge the bad characters, but be wise).

Never stop helping people even though it's not always soothing (...but be wise in helping). Share gifts to children and orphans and try to make out time to offer them most dominant of your gifts,, e.g. teaching, singing, drawing etc... This will serve as a guide-light and shield that will direct you to your destiny and you should emerge victorious. Remember, a lot of people pass through this journey and end in misery. God will be with you.

Digest this little piece and grow more understanding yourself.

...from experience.

creolehunt:


Inasmuch as your comment is sensible, I must point out that i was not aware of their story until we got really involved. So there was no way I could have been drawn to their history.

HisSexcellency:
This is simple, it is a natural law known as automaton conformity. You're drawn to that which you feel comfortable with, it is an involuntary action. Same reason intelligent students in school gets drawn to one another, while the less intelligent ones do likewise.
Same reason it's easier for a smoker to make friend with another smoker in a new environment. Why a poor man easily makes friends with a fellow poor man and the rich with the rich.
Op, it is your personality that attracts them. It will require effort and determination on your part to break this attraction.
Work on this mentality of settling with what you feel comfortable with, and watch how things will change.

DedeNkem:


You still believe in "baba" in 2020! What a waste of a human you're!
You're a product of the abysmal education system in the country!

creolehunt:
I just thought about the girls I've been with and noticed a certain trend. This isn't even about the girls themselves who are excellent human beings, but their families.

First girl I dated revealed to me that the dad died of suspected poisoning and her family were chased out of the family house. Her eldest brother is an area boy while it seems things aren't working out for her other siblings.

The next ones dad was late too, one of her sisters is separated from her husband while the first son of nearly 40 has nothing doing.

The other ones history is that her dad is late too. The eldest sister is cohabiting with a man. They have 2 kids already without being married. Her other sisters bride price was just paid after having 3 kids with a man.

For the other one, her dad is late too, died quite early. The eldest sister is in her 30s and unmarried. Her other sister has 3kids for a man who she isn't married to and now they are separated. Things aren't just working for her people.

The one I just met recently told me her parents are late. Lost both of them to suspected poisoning within the space of one year.

I keep wondering if this is some sort of coincidence.

creolehunt:
I just thought about the girls I've been with and noticed a certain trend. This isn't even about the girls themselves who are excellent human beings, but their families.

First girl I dated revealed to me that the dad died of suspected poisoning and her family were chased out of the family house. Her eldest brother is an area boy while it seems things aren't working out for her other siblings.

The next ones dad was late too, one of her sisters is separated from her husband while the first son of nearly 40 has nothing doing.

The other ones history is that her dad is late too. The eldest sister is cohabiting with a man. They have 2 kids already without being married. Her other sisters bride price was just paid after having 3 kids with a man.

For the other one, her dad is late too, died quite early. The eldest sister is in her 30s and unmarried. Her other sister has 3kids for a man who she isn't married to and now they are separated. Things aren't just working for her people.

The one I just met recently told me her parents are late. Lost both of them to suspected poisoning within the space of one year.

I keep wondering if this is some sort of coincidence.

Tripitaka:
Have you dated a girl who is a product of incest?
Have you dated a girl whose brother raped the mother for ritual purposes?
Have you dated a girl who grew up to find out that her actual dad is the family driver, but the pregnancy was passed on to the "willing dad"?
Have you dated a girl whose own father has been sexually abusing?
Have you dated a girl whose mother's nude pictures are all over the internet because she was caught shoplifting?

I believe your answer would be "No", as you would have included these in your narrative.

The families in your narrative can hardly be classed as "troubled" as I would like to think that your experiences are the peculiarities of your average Nigerian family. The average Nigerian family where diabolism and fetishism is real; where cohabitation is in vogue because the government outlaws abortion and your parents would insist on you living with the man who impregnated you even if he has no interest in marrying you; where young widows are still oppressed by their late husband's relatives; where poverty and unemployment is the norm hence a 40yr old unemployed man is nothing out of the ordinary.

The women you have been with are not from troubled families, at least in my opinion. They are simply from Nigerian families.

Nnaabros:
If you grew up in a family without any issues then count yourself very lucky.

Oluromantic:

You have problem for not being able to distinguish between a joke and a serious post

creolehunt:
I just thought about the girls I've been with and noticed a certain trend. This isn't even about the girls themselves who are excellent human beings, but their families.

First girl I dated revealed to me that the dad died of suspected poisoning and her family were chased out of the family house. Her eldest brother is an area boy while it seems things aren't working out for her other siblings.

The next ones dad was late too, one of her sisters is separated from her husband while the first son of nearly 40 has nothing doing.

The other ones history is that her dad is late too. The eldest sister is cohabiting with a man. They have 2 kids already without being married. Her other sisters bride price was just paid after having 3 kids with a man.

For the other one, her dad is late too, died quite early. The eldest sister is in her 30s and unmarried. Her other sister has 3kids for a man who she isn't married to and now they are separated. Things aren't just working for her people.

The one I just met recently told me her parents are late. Lost both of them to suspected poisoning within the space of one year.

I keep wondering if this is some sort of coincidence.

HisSexcellency:

You're missing the point here, automaton conformity is a natural law, you get drawn to them by default. Your attraction to this set of girls is based on a kinda vibe you get from them, which you're kinda cool with, you don't need to know their names or were they come from, you just find yourself being drawn to them.
Let me give you an instant, take a prostitute from a brothel here in Nigeria and get her enrolled at a university somewhere in Uk, it will take conscious effort and determination on her part not to return to her trade or mingle with like minded people over there. This is because she will continue to resonate with that vibe until she does something about it.