@ poster

go back home!!!

i hope this is not a belated advice, as whatever will happen must have happened

@poster if this true well ur husband is ur husband no matter what happens u guys are maried unlike ur co worker at work. Trust me He is just going to ve sex with u and dump u at the end and you will regret it tust me am also a man.

@TOLA77,
U've not done anything wrong for havin' a crush on ur colleague.But u'll do wrong if u don't put ur feelings in check,trust me!The way u're goin',if this Nick guy gets u alone in a room,u'll ruin ur life,i bet u a million dollars.Talk to ur husband always,even if u already do,talk to him more and if possible,let him speed up his travel arrangements or better still travel to him.If u know God,u could ask him for help,just tell him to kill ur crush for this guy.I just said a prayer for u now!Goodluck!

u know wat's right, so pray to do the right thing

@Militia, talk true, u r a bored ugly housewife that regrets being married to your douchebag of a husband who dosen't knack you anymore. You tried knacking outside and u were successful, only the guy dumped u afterwards. Now u r stuck at home with douchebag's kids and u r pissed and bitter, hence ur attacks on poor honest Tola77.

@Tola, you'll regret it in the end, though it may be so sweet in the doing. Get over it, it aint worth it!

@Tola77,
Abeg no try am ooooo.Think abt the curse following such an act.Proverbs 31:10

You no need post am here now, Ashewo, you don forget your oath that for better or for worse, I fear woman ooooh

@poster,
you know its bad already and you are feeling guilty already so what do u want here,you need somebody to say cheat or do not cheat.

Tola , dont mind all those who have submitted unpleasant advice or comment, i guess they have never been in that position. i can understand your position absolutely. i remmember my 3 level at Delsu, there is someone who was already engaged to her husband that had the same feelings for me. i regreet doing it and its one of those things that i wish i could change if i have the power to turn back the hands of time. i must tell you she regrett it also coz its all infactuation on her side but i love her. im sure situation like this must have happened to all those who have submitted unpleasant comments. so i will advise that you should please try hold yourself coz its infatuation and not love.

i appreciate your courage to open up for advice. Stay strong,God will not be happy if you do it. remain Bless.

Davidylan
something tells me Nick is white. That may explain the sudden "attraction" especially since he is openly flirting with you in return.
Enjoy urself breaking ur 1 yr old marriage, i'm sure Nick just wants to feel the experience of laying a black woman before he moves on to his white princesses.

Am not sure i like the tone of your comment, if you wanna bring race into the matter saying a white nick only wants to have fun, fair enough he may want just fun but so does Segun,Dapo,emeka and co , a white guy does not only chat a black woman for fun, and then return to his white princess, my take is black woman no be princess, irrespective of race love can and does happen and prevail hun.please use common sense oh hun,

babe forget about the stuff, why do you do this, trying to cheat on your husband, is God forbiden, no matter how emotional you are, just try to endure it, take your away form it, remember Paul said, all things are permissible for me but they are not profitable, this is not profitable, apart form broken your 1yr hme, it will affect your life, your life will not balance again, so think of it, dont do it.
in shut, DONT DO IT< IF YOU DO, YOU WILL SURELY RUIN YOUR LIFE FINALLY,

I do not need this, this is the first time I've been bold enough to share this ! I do not think this is new or strange ! Women go through a lot of experiences which they don't ever share because of these responses of yours and end up following their heads, I never knew it could happen to me, all I need is just advice on how to handle the situation not to be trampled upon Cry

@Tola77 - I think its a bit rich for you to admit that you are considering cheating on your husband, then getting offended for being called a tart. What did you expect? A cuddle to make you feel better? Maybe "Nick" can do that. Or maybe u want understanding for the "stress" u must be going through? Eh?
You MUST be a tart, or at least close to becoming one, otherwise why would you deny it at the start of ur post? or why would you attempt to justify the way u feel by bringing up what ur Husband MAY be doing at work?

U need to get real!

this is a typical definition of female vulnerability

This could only have come from a woman - and one with the reasoning abilities of an Aardvark at that.
A woman is thinking of bleeping another man, whilst her husband is away in another country, and the best u can come up with is "female vulnerability"? Wonders shall never cease.

TOLA must have banged the hell out of nick by now, those weak comments she made last yr cannot convince a 3yr old. She knew she was gona do it first time she set her bitchy eyes on him. Most women have this problem anyway, thats why dey do shiiiiiittttttt!!!!!!

U HAVE A RIGHT TO WHATEVER U FEEL AND IT IS BECOS UR HUSBAND IS NOT THERE WITH U. BUT KNOW IT IS ALL INFATUATION IT IS NOT REAL . TEMPTATIONS WILL COME BUT IT TAKES U TO OVERCOME IT. IT IS ALSO A MIND SET, TAKE UR MIND OFF IT START SEEING HIM LIKE ALL THE OTHER PEOPLE U WORK WITH. AND IT IS FOR SURE A TEST OF FAITH. BE WISE

First to all the "IDIOTS" that sent their post and called her names and act like they are saints when we know they would do worse than her,

As for you My Dear, you are married and God does not like Adultery, all you have to do is ask God for strength to overcome this because is not just easily said and don just the way some fools are running their mouth her.

There must be some one in your family who you are close to that you can talk to like your mom,your sister or you brother just try and confide in some one and then ask God for strength and don't listen to all these fools and hypocrites that just come on Nairaland to look for who they would call names,

The Lord is your strength

Attraction is a normal thing. Nothing to be scared of.

If I may chip in my bit. No matter what a man looks like, if you truly love your husband you will never, I repeat, you will never have a crush on another man to an extent of flaunting your sexual gestures at the man. Let us be realistic here, you want him to ride on top of you probably because you think he's hotter than your husband and you think you can't be caught.
Your marriage is only a year old and I suppose should be fresh within your memory unfortunately the case isn't like that. I saw you mentioned in the latter part of your post that you were wondering if he's having the same problem too in Nigeria, are you trying to justify your sexual exploits? My pities for you are high and I wish you can see where you're riding to. You're on your way to ruining your marriage but that utterly depends on if your husband finds out. You have been married for 1 year and have only spent 6 months at your work place and you already have a fantasy you want to lick in bed? Wow! Your husband is so unlucky. Asking for advice here shows your deliberate weakness and you can't get help here. Think about what you wanna do and go ahead to explore it to the maximum - Cash that one in.

Let's say you had the fun and somehow you get pregnant, what'd you do? Have abortion? What's your conscience going to tell you? Heartlessly stupid and a pitiful sob is what you are, I don't want to use the "W" word on you but you act like one.

my dear!!! u r heading for destruction.(s) pls flew!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1 :-x

Lusting after him already, you have commited sin all you have to do is ask God for forgiveness, and also pray that God should deliver you fromthe temptation of the so called Nick,  Adultery is a sin,  No matter how small it might seem, there is a road seem to be good, smooth but the end thereof is destruction, That road you are about going through would only bring destruction my dear friend don't go that path

so who is this lady cos she is not new here.

@poster,
pray to God . I know how difficult this could be. Get a pastor or a strong xtian: someone u can confide in and share your problem with and pray everyday. read proverbs chapter 5 regularly.God'll help you

4k am and lets hear word o jare if u love ue coll den sleep wit him ur husbands ove still remains jawe

Malita you are just a sick individual! Go for a head check.Stupid idiot!

Lola77,marriage is a life time thing and is a pride on the side of both man and woman but women are most respected when they are married meaning that u av gotten the most precious thing every women desire.y will u cos of lust n self satisfaction destroy most valuable but rare gift(marriage) ALMIGTHY has given to u.Do u expect after marriage things should work out ur way?NO,U ar bound to face CHALLENGES,TEMPTATIONS.Ur success in marriage depends on how u are able to overcome these challenges.Pls dont dare it if u do u are doomed.its just 5-10minutes pleasure and u are finished.

that lady is not running behind the love  but she is running behind the money, promotion  or  something else   the coleaque she is talking about is her  direct Boss    African ladies  you see the impression   when  you are fond of money ?

hhmmnnn, what do i tell you now.i believe its becos your hubby is not with you.its the major cause of the loop hole.i guess you are also weak in controlling your emotions.for crying out loud if you say you love your hubby like you claim then i dont think you shud have a nick on your mind.this is the result of long distance thing.i'll advice u go be with ur hubby b4 the unexpected happens.it will be difficult to get that white dude out of your mind cos the devil has visited u already. Girlie get down on ur knees and ask Jah for help cus you are about to join his aulterer's list.

take care luv ya all

i would advise u not to fall into this terrible temptation cos it will lead u to total destruction .

sometime , i used to wonder when all these would end . our fore fathers rarely experienced such , i mean what u are going thru right now .

when would our husband be for us and when would our wife be our wife.

its so unfortunate that this kind of a thing is happening .
i wish u the best

Lady, i know exactly how you feel.Its completely wrong for married couple to be far apart but since you have found you self in this mess, i have to give you my humble advice.
Satan wants to ruin your marrige completely, therefore take heed less you fall.Its a taboo for a married woman to lust after another man.Its a very serious issue,i must say.As it is there is nothing that can seperate you from your husband.
What i want you to do now ;
is to resign your job so that the guy will be out of your site.
Secondly,if you love the job so much, report your the situation to your husband ,dont hide any bit of it.
Each time you have conversation with the guy,report every detail to you husband.
Most importantly,TRY TO DEVELOP A SELF CONTROL. (ZIP UP UR HEART AND UR FEELING TOWARDS THE GUY)
FINALLY,PRAY FOR DIVINE INTERVENTION.
If you still need more advice feel free to communicate me-you can call-+234-7037870725 for prayers.
GOD will help you to overcome this demonic situation,AMEN.

This thread was from 2007 the original poster hasn't been on since 2007

hmn. what all that tola 77 or what is your username are you playing with us or how?

is not that u won't find anyone u liked even after ur marriage but it takes one thing to overcome all that i.e SELF CONTROL.