This OP will make a terrible wife and mother who wants to bet?

You're finished, you have nothing to offer any reasonable man anymore.

In my own experience as a child i have come to understand that discipline really don't have to do with beating a child frequently when they are wrong.I could count the numbas of days my dad laid his hands on me while growing up as a kid. My dad was a disciplinarian but he uses more of advice and sunday morning devotion to nurture and train us in becoming what we are today. It is still hard to deviate even now that he is no more alive. I wish i still have him around,for him to see the person his son has become today. Even in death he is still the best DAD.

FeliciaOja:
It is now I understand what being strict does, it makes you live a life of pretence, cos when I got into University I wanted to explore everything  I didn’t have the chance of doing at home.

I drank alcohol like crazy, smoked weed, hung out with rich boys, partying, doing drugs but when I go visit my Parents, I still act like that innocent girl they have always known.

My Dad’s strictness led to my Pretence, if he had drawn me close like my mum did, I would have been a better kid.

When parents use strictness to shut down a kids curiosity instead of guiding them, you are making matters worse for that kid. Because eventually that curiosity will lead them into adventures and exploring all those things you refused them to..

Looking back, al the flogging I received from my dad only made me more stubborn and ruthless.

Nothing really changed? Until my mum made me change for good.

Parents need to use wisdom not force..

Taaaa there OP
See your life, your mom drew you close, yet you still turned wayward, do you realise there are some children with just their mom and they turned out fine ? Even when the single parent was strict ?
Just tell us the truth, your waywardness na follow come, as an ogbanje girl ,even if your dad drew you close the way your mom did, you would still turn out bad and blame it on an aunt that didnt join them to draw you close.
You for kuku go buy tow rope make people use dey draw you close

LordKO:
Don't mistake strict parents for oppressive parents - offspring of the former always turns out well, especially when the offspring isn't innately insane.

Strict parents do train their offspring to exercise their liberty and live life within the confines of decorum. While oppressive parents do train their offspring to live life within the confines of their self-interest and wishes, thereby denying them liberty and, by extension, make them disingenuous.

Pseudo/wannabe libertarian parents, on the other hand, usually turn out to breed crass and expedient offspring, because in the cause of forming woke they allow their offspring to live life and exercise their liberty on the periphery of decorum.

Strict parents are literally the true libertarians - strict parents are akin to conscientious parents.

GoD Bless you. JuSt like the Quote goes. "Have fun, but don't lose it though".
But most peeps who see themselves as or who people see as STRiCt won't let you have fun at all.

You went wild because you wanted to biko. Don't begin to blame your parents.

What did you want from them? To serve you meals with alcohol or to introduce you to weed?

Better take up responsibility for yourself and clean up your shit

What nonsense!

FeliciaOja:
It is now I understand what being strict does, it makes you live a life of pretence, cos when I got into University I wanted to explore everything  I didn’t have the chance of doing at home.

I drank alcohol like crazy, smoked weed, hung out with rich boys, partying, doing drugs but when I go visit my Parents, I still act like that innocent girl they have always known.

My Dad’s strictness led to my Pretence, if he had drawn me close like my mum did, I would have been a better kid.

When parents use strictness to shut down a kids curiosity instead of guiding them, you are making matters worse for that kid. Because eventually that curiosity will lead them into adventures and exploring all those things you refused them to..

Looking back, al the flogging I received from my dad only made me more stubborn and ruthless.

Nothing really changed? Until my mum made me change for good.

Parents need to use wisdom not force..

When You born your own, we go know. You na bad girl. Whether they cage you or not. You wan make your papa leave you like that so that you go carry belle return house,abi. Package yourself. No blame your papa. Me wey dey, my papa flog me wella wella.I enter uni, still behave. Go seat down.

See another mumu....

Who smoked weed?

Who's fussy boys bleeped?

Who will live your life?

Who will regret all the actions?

Your parent tried to train you to be a good and better lady and you chose to be a bad lady. No one will regret all these but you.


Someday not too far from now, you will leave ur parent house and start regretting all your actions in school. Then, you will appreciate all their monitoring and training.

For the main time, try and stop all the actions and start doing good to them. You do not have to tell them about the bad acts in sch just stop and stop now.

The earlier you stop the better. You can still live a more better life - you deserve it.

ednut1:
Life has no manual. Children from strict and non strict homes turn out good or bad.

i bear you my humble testimony that life has a manual. please look for it.

crackland:

All of that happened ONLY because of your bad decisions and the wrong kind of company you kept, it wasn't due to the style of discipline you were given by your dad.

If you had been involved in more profitable things like hanging out with the brightest students who spent their time studying and sitting at the front of the lecture hall, or perhaps you joined a religious Christian group and made friends from there, you would not have had anyone to drink, smoke, party, or do drugs with.

Your mom who wasn't strict, why didn't her relaxed disciplinary style have any effect on you?

Learn to have some personal responsibility for your choices.

Well said op.

Who lose now? Don't forget that whatsoever you sow, you reap.

At least, you are back to the right path.

All the while you explored, you knew you were on the wrong path thanks to the strict training you got as a child.

In essence, without the strict training you would have been irredeemably spoilt and doomed...

@FeliciaOja

You wanted to be a spoilt child, you come spoil finish. Now you are blaming your father for being strict and preventing you from bad influence of others. You need serious brain check

crackland:

All of that happened ONLY because of your bad decisions and the wrong kind of company you kept, it wasn't due to the style of discipline you were given by your dad.

If you had been involved in more profitable things like hanging out with the brightest students who spent their time studying and sitting at the front of the lecture hall, or perhaps you joined a religious Christian group and made friends from there, you would not have had anyone to drink, smoke, party, or do drugs with.

Your mom who wasn't strict, why didn't her relaxed disciplinary style have any effect on you?

Learn to have some personal responsibility for your choices.

Enough said...

U just dei make noise
Strict no strick if u wan spoil u Go spoil
My parents were strict too I'm a guy
#I drank alcohol didn't like it
#Weed I didn't try because I've always loved to c someone puffing smokes n trust me I've got hard core smokers as friends
#the colet that one I like am o but not a freak but I like look nyash no b small
Overall still a good boy wei just like colet sha

FeliciaOja:
It is now I understand what being strict does, it makes you live a life of pretence, cos when I got into University I wanted to explore everything  I didn’t have the chance of doing at home.

I drank alcohol like crazy, smoked weed, hung out with rich boys, partying, doing drugs but when I go visit my Parents, I still act like that innocent girl they have always known.

My Dad’s strictness led to my Pretence, if he had drawn me close like my mum did, I would have been a better kid.

When parents use strictness to shut down a kids curiosity instead of guiding them, you are making matters worse for that kid. Because eventually that curiosity will lead them into adventures and exploring all those things you refused them to..

Looking back, al the flogging I received from my dad only made me more stubborn and ruthless.

Nothing really changed? Until my mum made me change for good.

Parents need to use wisdom not force..

This your theory works negatively on few cases, I also came from a family of very strict parentage. Most children of strict parents learn to respect themselves in time because as far as your parents is concerned you don't have second opportunity. African children are more likely to be wayward if coming from lenient parentage than strict parentage. Though many things in life doesn't always follow as we planned

If u catch hiv na ur parents go suffer am Dey don live their own life o. If u lyk spoil ur womb too with abortion. Na u go cry last last

FeliciaOja:
It is now I understand what being strict does, it makes you live a life of pretence, cos when I got into University I wanted to explore everything  I didn’t have the chance of doing at home.

I drank alcohol like crazy, smoked weed, hung out with rich boys, partying, doing drugs but when I go visit my Parents, I still act like that innocent girl they have always known.

My Dad’s strictness led to my Pretence, if he had drawn me close like my mum did, I would have been a better kid.

When parents use strictness to shut down a kids curiosity instead of guiding them, you are making matters worse for that kid. Because eventually that curiosity will lead them into adventures and exploring all those things you refused them to..

Looking back, al the flogging I received from my dad only made me more stubborn and ruthless.

Nothing really changed? Until my mum made me change for good.

Parents need to use wisdom not force..

Have some personal accountability and stop shifting blames. Are you an APC member?
You did what you did because of the choices YOU made. And not because of your parents discipline.
I was disciplined by my parents, to the point where I once doubted if my Dad was my Dad. Because the way I was beaten. I went to a Army School and a Unity School. The discipline, "no get part two".
Yet, I did not "change" when I had the freedom to do so in Uni and later years.
Own your bad behaviour.

My mum was never strict, she never forced us to do anything, she would ask us about the girls we liked and would want to meet my girlfriend to advice us about sex and how if we aren’t planning to get married, having sex will ruin our lives. My dad was also easygoing, when we got to 200 level he advised us to always have a condom in our room, he said he knows what it feels like being a young man and having your hormones take over sometimes, better safe than sorry.
All this advice made me a very calm and careful person when it came to experimenting things.

Dear Op it a burning desire.. You always want to explore and the environment present you with what you ache for. You plan was not all focus on academic excellent.. As long as You over 16 and in school trust me you in control. You type can't do well overseas America in particular. You would have end up been a shadow of yourself before realising.

The child growing up has to learn from choices, it is what pushes us to explore the world. Some readily accept the supposed result of such choices of those who have been there before them who themselves may not have experience the result to the said choice as it could have been passed on to them. They are termed as good children per se.

The other just may like to experience the choices for themselves.

Even when teaching, there's so much fulfilment from the student if he/she completes solving a task (sometimes of his own choosing, or arbitrarily fixed by the parent or tutor etc) with his method... Of course not all student may be able to come up with a method of theirs. The goal is to adopt the method of the tutor without having to shove it down the student's throat or doing that but reconciling so whatever resentment does not remain for long to eat em up in future

I think the goal of parenting should be guiding those choice in a manner not to cause or avoid resentment in the child. Cause that's when the messed up behaviours starts to spring up

DontBullshitMe:
Nonsense.

After she have finished fvcking all the rich dudes
She's now blaming it on her strict dad.... absolutely NONSENSE

Royalfurnitures:
Only God can make a child to behave well not by human efforts


Beautify your homes with our quality and durable furniture collections today

The highlighted statement is not entirely true!
God has already blessed man/woman with the required tools and skills to train up a child!

Point your kids in the right direction—
when they’re old they won’t be lost. Pro. 22:6 (MSG)

yongg:

This works for the seemingly good one which could be subjectively argued.

Basically children are visitor you have invited into your home some need better handling than others because humans are basically different and all these you put up here aren't the only things that come into play. Things can get so subjective that you'd think that you are referring to the same grade and manner of discipline.

How else would you explain why a so called problem child would experience a great turn around when he or she is exposed to an open mind tour guide ( that allows you non threatening doses of consequences of self made choice not imposed 100%)

It really doesn't matter the grade or manner of discipline.

I bet the OP has siblings who didn't do half the things she did while in school, yet they were all raised with the same manner/level of strictness.

How would you explain that?

I don't agree with you op. I have the strictest parents and when I became independent I never explored or did anything contrary to what they wanted of me.

FeliciaOja:
It is now I understand what being strict does, it makes you live a life of pretence, cos when I got into University I wanted to explore everything  I didn’t have the chance of doing at home.

I drank alcohol like crazy, smoked weed, hung out with rich boys, partying, doing drugs but when I go visit my Parents, I still act like that innocent girl they have always known.

My Dad’s strictness led to my Pretence, if he had drawn me close like my mum did, I would have been a better kid.

When parents use strictness to shut down a kids curiosity instead of guiding them, you are making matters worse for that kid. Because eventually that curiosity will lead them into adventures and exploring all those things you refused them to..

Looking back, al the flogging I received from my dad only made me more stubborn and ruthless.

Nothing really changed? Until my mum made me change for good.

Parents need to use wisdom not force..

When you are a terrible and bad human being, you put all the blames on your parent.

Do I need to tell you my story? Maybe I should.

The reason my mother and father doesn't let me out normal and mingle is because of terrible people like you who would instill a mode of thought that could easy turn a child against his parents.

Will you be able to make me hate my parents? No, you never will. In fact, the moment you attempt to do that, I will desert you and if you push me, I will pull the trigger on your brain.

Let me tell what happened as a result of my parents not allowing to go out of their range and being strict.

They groomed the most healthy, mentally strong human being, religious, pious and noble human being and the reason why it happened is because they were true pure Yoruba people who realized that there is ingrained low quality, corrupt behavior or mode of thoughts among the majority of Nigerians except Yoruba and if they did allow me to mingle with this people at the years I was growing to do the right things, I will have being the most corrupt and terrible person.

Yes, people like you are the reason why parents are stricter and never allowed their children to mingle with terrible creatures like you.

In my own best opinion, you can smack child a very young age probably till they reach like age 12 but also make em know where they messed up as well....age 13yrs above don't need much flogging but talk to there souls.... Note what works for A no fit work for B.

crackland:

Only someone who was/is not serious in school will type such a thing.

This is a young Barack Obama and another of Elon Musk.

Though I am against smoking and see it as a bad habit it is not really an accurate measure of someone's intelligence.

FeliciaOja:

Ever wonder why pastor children turn out to be worse than their pastor parents?

How many pastor children do you know?

Yeye talk.

Farki:


This is a young Barack Obama and another of Elon Musk.

Though I am against smoking and see it as a bad habit it is not really an accurate measure of someone's intelligence.

Smoking is not a measure of one's intelligence, I never said so.

Smoking is simply a bad habit acquired from bad company.
It doesn't mean a smoker can't be smart.

U lived the way u choose. Nothing like your parents been strict on you made u do that. Been strict can make u change ur style of dressing but not to this extent.
What u did was actually your choice!

crackland:

All of that happened ONLY because of your bad decisions and the wrong kind of company you kept, it wasn't due to the style of discipline you were given by your dad.

If you had been involved in more profitable things like hanging out with the brightest students who spent their time studying and sitting at the front of the lecture hall, or perhaps you joined a religious Christian group and made friends from there, you would not have had anyone to drink, smoke, party, or do drugs with.

Your mom who wasn't strict, why didn't her relaxed disciplinary style have any effect on you?

Learn to have some personal responsibility for your choices.

God bless you