I am sad though that the same problems that plague the Black American Family are creeping into the Nigerian family unit.

We are far behind them but our pace isn't slowing down.

So much turmoil in marriages now unlike the 60s/70s.

I don't think there is any effective remedy.

CanadaOrBust:

It’s well deserved

Xisnin:


It is not that clear cut as some of those with both parents will end up at the top or the bottom too.
I suspect we will have more of them at the top than the other cohort.

In reality, parental wealth and education is more predictive of
children's future success than the absence of a father.

It turns out that a two-parent household is richer on average than the single-parent one.

This somehow doesn’t apply in 9ja . How many children of richest and most successful Nigerians of yesteryears are among the famous movers and shakers of today? Who replaced Zik, Awo, Gowon, Ojukwu, OBJ, etc. Definitely not their children. Check well and you’ll find they are replaced by people from originally poor or moderate families

VULCAN:
I am sad though that the same problems that plague the Black American Family are creeping into the Nigerian family unit.

We are far behind them but our pace isn't slowing down.

So much turmoil in marriages now unlike the 60s/70s.

I don't think there is any effective remedy.

Nigerians do blind copy copy. Same way they blindly copied American presidential system without copying all the little checks and balances, resulting in an all too powerful presidency. Also they retained the annoying English titles, Rt. Hon., etc. Even the lawyers insist on wearing their stupid English wigs despite the hot sun

CanadaOrBust:


Lol.. It must be torture reading some of the comments on Nairaland

Not at all. I realize that Nigerians are a brainwashed lot.

pDudd:


Ok i go yarn.

The reason is not a simple one but a multifaceted one. Many factors come into play when it comes to finding out the reason. The reasons are cultural, socioeconomic, historical, personal, and societal.

Cultural: In the AA community, having a kid outside wedlock is a normal thing. It is even encouraged because kids are able to increase your socioeconomic status. The more kids you have, the more money you get on your tax returns, also the more you are able to get improved welfare packages. So a man is needed only to reproduce and not necessary to raise kids. If a man is present in the home and is earning income to take care of the kids, the lady may not be able to access the welfare package.

Socioeconomic: Like I said above, if you are a single mother, you are in a better position to access welfare packages due to your kids. The society looks upon you as a victim and this affords you access to many welfare benefits, such as free childcare, free daycare, free healthcare, free housing, free food, etc. The government will provide all that for you just for being a single mother so you don't need any man. You only need the occasional dick to calm your loins but not for keepsies.

Historical: Historically, black in America were not allowed to marry or cohabit. The slavery era did this to them and hence that practice has been passed down till today. Also the introduction of the welfare system ensured that women who had men present in the house could not access welfare benefits. Hence men are not needed by the women.

Societal: In the African American community, many men between 18 to 45 are dead or in prison serving long sentences. Therefore there are about 3-4 females to every 1 male. This uneven distribution makes it hard to have a man as your own. And even when you do, other females are waiting to snatch him from you. Furthermore, the few good black men there are tend to pick women from other races (white, Latino, Asian, Samoan, etc women) because he doesn't want the drama of black women. And this furthermore reduces the picking for AA women.

Personal: Because of the unstable nature of African American relationship Dynamics, some women or men in the African American community may choose to remain single.


Also other factors that can come into play are family Dynamics in which a lady is likely not to have a permanent partner because her mother and grandmother never had stable partners. So this becomes her norm and is an acceptable way of life.

Also no other races date black women in America. So they they have limited choices in men when it comes to the relationship pool. They only have black men to look up to.


Hope this helps.

for the sake of this post , i think I am glad I am Nigerian woman and not an African American woman. What a life

Swtbabyvee:
for the sake of this post , i think I am glad I am Nigerian woman and not an African American woman. What a life

My dear you are lucky to be a Nigerian woman. But Nigerian females are gradually becoming like AA women. Slowly but surely.

pDudd:


Ok so therefore you understand the situation then.

It's easy for us Nigerians to criticize them without walking in their shoes.

When I was young in primary school, I will bring home excellent report cards with like 4th or 5th positions. My dad will be asking me if the person that carried first had 2 heads.

One of my AA classmates in school told me that right from when she was little, her mom used to tell her to stop wasting her time with school because she will never make it.

See the difference in our situations?

their inferiority complex is appalling and This thinking is passed on from generation to generation, I know there were slaves and all but not anymore, and I feel they are living way better than African, black Americans in particular are given more opportunities compared to any other black foreign person . But they hv the lowest self esteem ever .... they blame slavery but never want to blame themselves for their shortcoming. As a Nigerian , I rather hv a white American friend than a black American, this is not racism . But damn I can’t deal with the negativity they hv chosen to carry as a badge!! Call 10 black names in the world and 7 would be black Americans but their adverage population still think the society is the problem, then how did others survive. They even had a black president.

I was trying to understand their perspective till I actually met one . They are angry for mostly nothing and do not take instructions. They want everyone to believe all their brothers are in jail cause they were black , that if it were a white person it would be a lower sentence but if they tell u what their brother did , u be like what were u expecting Eyes rolled* they carry guns everywhere they go for protection, not against whites but their fellow blacks , and whites are the problem? I can go on and on. I really don’t know why black American women are single but I sha know that most of them hv low self esteem, rubbish thinking and terrible bad character. If u see the way they fight in public for nothing, u go shame for them. Africans are way more civilized in thinking and way of life .. blame it all on slavery right !!

pDudd:


My dear you are lucky to be a Nigerian woman. But Nigerian females are gradually becoming like Akata women. Slowly but surely.

our thinking and ideology will never allow us to get to that level

Seems you want to crack my ribs!

CanadaOrBust:


Nigerians do blind copy copy. Same way they blindly copied American presidential system without copying all the little checks and balances, resulting in an all too powerful presidency. Also they retained the annoying English titles, Rt. Hon., etc. Even the lawyers insist on wearing their stupid English wigs despite the hot sun

Kissiemu:

Nna men!

When they said "black women" they mean African Americans. Are you one?

.

Kissiemu:

Nna men!

When they said "black women" they mean African Americans. Are you one?

Stop talking ignorantly Mr.

Terryishere:


All three of your reasons are wrong especially #3 To find out the root cause of mass incarceration for black Americans Google the 13th Amendment in the US Constitution, you will then understand systemic racism.

I do hope you know "single" in this context also include black women with kids but unmarried?

baralatie:

absolute nonsense

Yeah, it won't make sense to you cause you failed to comprehend that history played some part in the increased percent of unmarried black American women.

baralatie:

aha!
the question was about why are black American women single
the bolded you wrote reveals one of them

Exactly.

Terryishere:


You don't have to show me a picture of Adam Clayton Powell, I know my history. Adam Clayton Powell was a man of mixed heritage who live doing the time of Jim Crow and the ONE drop of black blood made you black rule, not a law but a rule to keep the white race pure.

they don't tell u at home that mixed ain't race?

Adam Powell was a white man and that is one drop rule not those that don't look white.

Terryishere:

That doesn't exist anymore, saying he was a black man is the same as saying Mariah Carey is a black woman which she is not. That's why they have biracial or other on the US census now.

Obama is black
he looks so called black
and he is biracial that aligned with his black side by marry black Queen.
so he is black black.

a biracial of white and black that aligned and marry into his/her white side is white to me cos that is what he/she valued.

we all know Mariah Carey is a white woman,whether she calls herself biracial or not,whether he has black father or not,her biracial is equal to white.

Terryishere:

It takes 2 white parents to make a white child just as it takes 2 black parents to make a.black child

which scientific term said it takes two black parent to make black child and take two white parents to make white child?


ice t is not white by social construct of race but he make white daughter!

Quincy jones two daughters rashida and Kenya are white as fvck and Quincy ain't white.

Terryishere:


Not at all. I realize that Nigerians are a brainwashed lot.

More like clueless. Glad u don’t take their comments to heart

pDudd:


My dear you are lucky to be a Nigerian woman. But Nigerian females are gradually becoming like ..women. Slowly but surely.

Please edit and remove that meaningless word
I know u r not a perjorative person

VULCAN:
Seems you want to crack my ribs!

compton11:
they don't tell u at home that mixed ain't race?

Obama is black
he looks so called black
and he is biracial that aligned with his black side by marry black Queen.
so he is black black.

a biracial of white and black that aligned and marry into his/her white side is white to me cos that is what he/she valued.

we all know Mariah Carey is a white woman,whether she calls herself biracial or not,whether he has black father or not,her biracial is equal to white.

which scientific term said it takes two black parent to make black child and take two white parents to make white child?


ice t is not white by social construct of race but he make white daughter!

Quincy jones two daughters rashida and Kenya are white as fvck and Quincy ain't white.

All this u r writing na wash. Bottom line: IN USA if u have black anything u r black. Not so in Nigeria. In 9ja if you look somewhat white u r white even if u have black parents, if u look black u r black

CanadaOrBust:


Please edit and remove that meaningless word “Akata”.
I know u r not a perjorative person

Oh sorry. Mistake. You're right.

CanadaOrBust:


All this u r writing na wash. Bottom line: IN USA if u have black anything u r black. Not so in Nigeria. In 9ja if you look somewhat white u r white even if u have black parents, if u look black u r black

in Nigeria or West Africa,we don't even use the shit called race but ethnicity,and I can tell many people in Nigeria call anybody with white skin as white.
that is why u will see them calling China and Lebanese white.

on US,many white don't believe in that sh.it called one drop rule again.

pDudd:


Oh sorry. Mistake. You're right.

You is a coool dude

ask google�

compton11:
in Nigeria or West Africa,we don't even use the shit called race but ethnicity,and I can tell many people in Nigeria call anybody with white skin as white.
that is why u will see them calling China and Lebanese white.

on US,many white don't believe in that sh.it called one drop rule again.

Don’t know about one drop rule, I know in US if u have one black parent and one white parent, u r considered black regardless of how u look or how u define yourself

CanadaOrBust:


Don’t know about one drop rule, I know in US if u have one black parent and one white parent, u r considered black regardless of how u look or how u define yourself

one drop rule wasn't even for those half and half.

it was for those quardroon and octoroon,the one that are already white.

Terryishere:


How do you know what white men are attracted to?

Everyone has different preferences. Some may like all kinds of ppl. I think it's more of an individual thing than a general thing. But I'm not American I don't know what things are like there. I'm Australian n there's plenty of interacial relationships here.

Not only in America even in South Africa

[quote author=Missyford31 post=93696287]

[s]Everyone has different preferences. Some may like all kinds of ppl. I think it's more of an individual thing than a general thing. But I'm not American I don't know what things are like there. I'm Australian n there's plenty of interacial relationships here. [[/s]/quote]

compton11:
they don't tell u at home that mixed ain't race?

Adam Powell was a white man and that is one drop rule not those that don't look white.

Obama is black
he looks so called black
and he is biracial that aligned with his black side by marry black Queen.
so he is black black.

a biracial of white and black that aligned and marry into his/her white side is white to me cos that is what he/she valued.

we all know Mariah Carey is a white woman,whether she calls herself biracial or not,whether he has black father or not,her biracial is equal to white.

which scientific term said it takes two black parent to make black child and take two white parents to make white child?


ice t is not white by social construct of race but he make white daughter!

Quincy jones two daughters rashida and Kenya are white as fvck and Quincy ain't white.

Ice T and Quincy Jones' daughters are not white and neither are they black they are both.

[quote author=Terryishere post=93699271][/quote]

is okaaay

Terryishere:

Ice T and Quincy Jones' daughters are not white and neither are they black they are both.

nigga they white!

u ain't blind,u see a white girl in Ice T daughter.

Rashida jones and kenya jones are also white

chigoizie7:


An eye opening. But I want to ask. Why is AA man seem to be more responsible when he is with other races apart from the black race? Why does other races find it hard being with an AA woman.?




In my opinion. No one wants to spend the rest of his life with headaches.


You might bring the question of why getting them pregnant in the first place? Well, we know the answer.

I used to see some white men with black women too in their profile pics when am reading comments on Facebook

Zinibanks why are you always looking for BAW but always complaining on each topic about them

Now lastly, I just finished watching a short clip on espn and I saw about three BAW with their husbands, didn't know their divorce rate or whatever you people are arguing about is this high