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The Lady In My Life, My Burden. - Romance (5) - Nairaland

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Re: The Lady In My Life, My Burden. by taibat61(m): 2:50pm On Jul 28, 2020
@OP, I think you have put yourself in a big canoe you don't deserve.

You want to solve a problem not burden on you by destiny but you use your own hand to cause trouble. I have learnt alot of great lesson in the journey of life Dy/dx of Man/woman.



So the lessons I learnt were:


1. Never make any woman your priority except your are married to her.
2. Always follow your instinct whenever you feel something is wrong.
3. Do not make money a point of attraction to a woman, no matter how small or big. Money doesn't hold a woman.

4. Always remember that Karma will always find its way to locate you. I broke an almost 6years relationship to be with another person which ended within a year

5. Don't be in a hurry to get serious with anybody within a year of a relationship. It is mostly a sign of desperation.

4 Likes

Re: The Lady In My Life, My Burden. by Zenithpeak(m): 2:50pm On Jul 28, 2020
LordNicvuitton:
Hi Romancelanders, don't know if it's right to share this topic here, but I'll do for now.

I'm Victory, from the East and currently a resident of Edo state. I came to this state, as an intern and thereafter, still served here and in the course of all these, I thought out and established a laundry business, which is just about 8 months old. This was to keep life going and to better bond well with the lady in my life currently.

While in Edo state, having rounded my internship & kickstarting service sometime around 2017, I met this Kiki Osemudiamen (Name changed), and it was nothing serious at 1st, cos I never really thought I'd date someone here, fact is that I never thought I'd stay beyond my service year. I met her while she was in 200l. We encouraged each other, she saw potentials and had faith in me just like I have so much faith in her. She is simplistic, encourages me to save and I in turn, encouraged her and guided her through some of her studies. She passed her 2nd MB.BS. and is currently awaiting lifting of the lockdown on schools, so she can start her clinicals.

Problem is that she came from a not buoyant family financially, and although both parents are alive, she struggles to survive/feed daily. Her dad supplies about 1000litres/trip water to households, while her mum sells at the local market. I on the other hand, came from a middle class family but my Dad is late since 2012, and I've been a sponsor of my education and that of my younger ones through the lil I inherited (which mum manages for now) plus my various endeavours. She depends on me for daily meals and other basic essentials, in fact I had to place her on salary in my laundry shop during this lockdown, so she plays the role of secretary in my shop too.

The latest challenge came about, yesterday. While she slept in the shop, I was out on errand, someone sneaked into the shop and stole her android phone with all of her e-medics textbooks (she reads mostly e-copies because she can't afford hardcopies), she has been crying all through and I really don't know what to do. Since I knew her, She'd been an appendage and an extra financial burden to me, I can't begin to list what I've done for her, although I kept reminding her never to not have entitlement mentality and she does appreciate. Out of desperation to ease her pain, I promised to sponsor her in getting a new phone. I have burdens, huge ones, I'm yet to acquire a diesel engine for my laundry (I use ponytail industrial iron which has higher voltage/current than normal ones), plus other related merchandise that I need to set up and I feel like she slows down my financial pace.

Honestly, I don't do all these for her, hoping for any personal gains, in the words of my daddy in the Lord, Prophet T.B. Joshua, He said and I quote: "We make a living by what we get and we make a life by what we give" but I am almost fed up and tired, especially when I remember that both her parents are still alive.. I am scared that that for the 1st time, I may fail her in that financial obligation because I honestly need money now, with the whole pandemic issue plus, I feel like she slows me down in life financially and a huge burden to me. Right now, she's so attached to me, more so that when I initially wanted to hault our relationship, it almost nearly affected her academics negatively. Please I need matured minds to help me think this through and garnish me with advice(s) because I almost feel so choked up and a rising urge to relocate from here, so i can breathe again.

NB: Advice from married couples and those in serious relationships, will be highly appreciated.

Modified: She went to her bank (First bank) this morning, only to be informed that about 20k (Her mum's business money) has been used to purchase recharge voucher. Her mum sends/receives money from distant customers through her account. Yesterday's scenario, all over again. Please folks, lock your SIM cards just as much as you lock your phones. Learn from this painful experience please.


Life sometimes can be unpleasantly funny, but love is always funnier bro.... angry

The problem here is not the phone persee, but the entire life of the lady in question depends on you. Just calm yourself down and flip the situation, " If it were to be my phone that got stolen would I replace it immediately and try to restore all the missing apps and ebooks'?

If your answer is yes, then, against all odds, please replace her phone and move on. The phone is a necessity to her!

That you're being chocked financially is another issues that you'll need to deal with technically. Just separate the issues and solve it one after the other.

The Lord will see you through.
Re: The Lady In My Life, My Burden. by benzion72(m): 2:50pm On Jul 28, 2020
Where ever you go go go ngo Where ever you be sisi eko Do not say yes when you mean to say no Baba ibadan
Re: The Lady In My Life, My Burden. by benzion72(m): 2:50pm On Jul 28, 2020
Where ever you go go go ngo Where ever you be sisi eko Do not say yes when you mean to say no Baba ibadan
Re: The Lady In My Life, My Burden. by Sixfeetbelle: 2:50pm On Jul 28, 2020
kongolo:
Let him be.They will always learn the HARD way .When the lady eventually graduates,begins to receive attention from a higher status male or acquires a good job,the way she will treat him like filth, we may one day see a blog story titled "Man kills self after woman he catered for years disappoints him"

The funny thing is that most of you guys think the same, in such a way that when the lady who's your destined helpmeet comes, you won't even recognise it cause you want to smash because you helped her.

Op is sitting on the fence when it comes to being her one and only. If they end up together, fine, if they don't, good. That's the kind of person he is. Since he isn't looking for the rewards just because he helped someone, reward will find him when he least expects it (The universal law of giving).

Even if he doesn't end up with her, this girl will be an instrument of upliftment to him in later years. That's the power of selflessness and sacrifice.

1 Like

Re: The Lady In My Life, My Burden. by abdullahi45: 2:51pm On Jul 28, 2020
life2017:


I have sent you an email request. I will like to sponsor her financially.

From your post, she is academically sound but limited by Finance.

U can provide ur phone number here. I will call u.

This is profound. The world would be a better place if we have more humanitarian people like you. Yeah, I also noticed that, she has the intellectual and tenacious ability but not the financial capacity.

1 Like

Re: The Lady In My Life, My Burden. by jizbaba: 2:51pm On Jul 28, 2020
Hey Guys, I sell laptops, iPhones, Samsung, Playstation at affordable prices. Please kindly follow my business page @ godof_gadgets and also refer me to your friends and family ❤️

Re: The Lady In My Life, My Burden. by uchrikk(m): 2:51pm On Jul 28, 2020
OP,
Report this case to the bank and the police. Trace who used the money in the bank.

As for the other advice which you asked for, you will become wiser when you truly lack money. She is not your responsibility, though I am not saying that you should not help the needy.

1 Like

Re: The Lady In My Life, My Burden. by Nobody: 2:51pm On Jul 28, 2020
LordNicvuitton:
Hi Romancelanders, don't know if it's right to share this topic here, but I'll do for now.

I'm Victory, from the East and currently a resident of Edo state. I came to this state, as an intern and thereafter, still served here and in the course of all these, I thought out and established a laundry business, which is just about 8 months old. This was to keep life going and to better bond well with the lady in my life currently.

While in Edo state, having rounded my internship & kickstarting service sometime around 2017, I met this Kiki Osemudiamen (Name changed), and it was nothing serious at 1st, cos I never really thought I'd date someone here, fact is that I never thought I'd stay beyond my service year. I met her while she was in 200l. We encouraged each other, she saw potentials and had faith in me just like I have so much faith in her. She is simplistic, encourages me to save and I in turn, encouraged her and guided her through some of her studies. She passed her 2nd MB.BS. and is currently awaiting lifting of the lockdown on schools, so she can start her clinicals.

Problem is that she came from a not buoyant family financially, and although both parents are alive, she struggles to survive/feed daily. Her dad supplies about 1000litres/trip water to households, while her mum sells at the local market. I on the other hand, came from a middle class family but my Dad is late since 2012, and I've been a sponsor of my education and that of my younger ones through the lil I inherited (which mum manages for now) plus my various endeavours. She depends on me for daily meals and other basic essentials, in fact I had to place her on salary in my laundry shop during this lockdown, so she plays the role of secretary in my shop too.

The latest challenge came about, yesterday. While she slept in the shop, I was out on errand, someone sneaked into the shop and stole her android phone with all of her e-medics textbooks (she reads mostly e-copies because she can't afford hardcopies), she has been crying all through and I really don't know what to do. Since I knew her, She'd been an appendage and an extra financial burden to me, I can't begin to list what I've done for her, although I kept reminding her never to not have entitlement mentality and she does appreciate. Out of desperation to ease her pain, I promised to sponsor her in getting a new phone. I have burdens, huge ones, I'm yet to acquire a diesel engine for my laundry (I use ponytail industrial iron which has higher voltage/current than normal ones), plus other related merchandise that I need to set up and I feel like she slows down my financial pace.

Honestly, I don't do all these for her, hoping for any personal gains, in the words of my daddy in the Lord, Prophet T.B. Joshua, He said and I quote: "We make a living by what we get and we make a life by what we give" but I am almost fed up and tired, especially when I remember that both her parents are still alive.. I am scared that that for the 1st time, I may fail her in that financial obligation because I honestly need money now, with the whole pandemic issue plus, I feel like she slows me down in life financially and a huge burden to me. Right now, she's so attached to me, more so that when I initially wanted to hault our relationship, it almost nearly affected her academics negatively. Please I need matured minds to help me think this through and garnish me with advice(s) because I almost feel so choked up and a rising urge to relocate from here, so i can breathe again.

NB: Advice from married couples and those in serious relationships, will be highly appreciated.

Modified: She went to her bank (First bank) this morning, only to be informed that about 20k (Her mum's business money) has been used to purchase recharge voucher. Her mum sends/receives money from distant customers through her account. Yesterday's scenario, all over again. Please folks, lock your SIM cards just as much as you lock your phones. Learn from this painful experience please.
which vicinity in Edo do u stay.. So I can patronize you
Re: The Lady In My Life, My Burden. by Jaapu: 2:51pm On Jul 28, 2020
TB Joshua will ruin you faster than this girl. But if she believes in TB Joshua too. My brother you are completely ruined.

3 Likes

Re: The Lady In My Life, My Burden. by Stmiceel(m): 2:51pm On Jul 28, 2020
Things are hard this days.
God will continue to help you to provide for her needs.
Peace.
Re: The Lady In My Life, My Burden. by Nobody: 2:52pm On Jul 28, 2020
LordNicvuitton:


Why would you think that it's a story? Look my profile, I've been on Nairaland since 2010. Go through my previous posts. This is why i suggested that only matured mature minds should rub minds with me.
Re: The Lady In My Life, My Burden. by YelloweWest: 2:53pm On Jul 28, 2020
LordNicvuitton:


I appreciate your kind input. She actually does the laundry in my absence (I work in a hospital within that area) so that when I'm back, I steam and package the clothes, just that i foot her daily meal and daily transport and then pay her monthly. She asked me for it, instead of her staying at home and she also knows that she won't get those extra privileges elsewhere, that she gets from me.

She is working for you so the monthly salary you pay her is not free!
As for the meals and tp, if u can't anymore inform her. Then end your relationship with her. Let her look for someone more suitable for herself. She's a daughter from a poor home, a lot is riding on her shoulders...

1 Like

Re: The Lady In My Life, My Burden. by sunbreaker: 2:53pm On Jul 28, 2020
AntiWailer:
Lol

Place lady on salary ?

U dey maad
nah real mad ; grin
Re: The Lady In My Life, My Burden. by Raymeg7(m): 2:55pm On Jul 28, 2020
HarunaWest:
Bla bla bla sheep have you any wool?... Just singing

Dude you already messed up big time. You had no reason to carry all her financial matter for head. She now sees you as a zaddy and zaddy must perform. However, draw up new terms with your chick. She can't come and drain you finish nah. Let her know that you don't have money to buy her her a phone. Place her strictly on salary and maintenance. Stop the feeding and tfare henceforth.

A wise man once said, and I quote 'don't start what you can't finish'.


baba what he needs now is a good advice ok, I don't think u are better too, relationship is not a child's play, it can lead to marriage, and we are all human being, is not all that easy to stop helping someone u love and care for, but he can reduce it in one way or the other, don't judge him ok
Re: The Lady In My Life, My Burden. by abdullahi45: 2:55pm On Jul 28, 2020
DenreleDave:




shocked lemme quickly set a lock on my Sim card ooo

Thank u ooo

How is this done?
Re: The Lady In My Life, My Burden. by pocohantas(f): 2:55pm On Jul 28, 2020
life2017:


I have sent you an email request. I will like to sponsor her financially.

From your post, she is academically sound but limited by Finance.

U can provide ur phone number here. I will call u.

This is laudable. Thank you!!

I hope we don’t discover at this point that the story is a fiction, just like zmpp’s Canadian residence. cheesy cheesy
Re: The Lady In My Life, My Burden. by lanre4411(m): 2:56pm On Jul 28, 2020
abdullahi45:
From your write up, clearly both of you are hardworking, tenacious and quite futuristic folks. You guys are very compatible, I suppose and the only problem here is the financial burden. Which I believe wouldn't have been the case, had it been she was from an affluent background or if the op himself is very financially buoyant. Since she doesn't spends extravagantly, spends on irrelevant things or unappreciative when you assist her.

What I would say is do what is within your capacity. I mean, that amount you can dash even a total stranger just for the sake of humanity. And make her understand sincerely when you don't have.

All the best to you guys, I hope she remains good, reserved, and unassuming even when she starts earning big from her future profession and beyond.
o.p listen to this advise he just spoke my mind, the issue here is financial crisis since you know her parent and they also know you both together I will advise u don't abandon her cos of finances I know the game looks very risky but at time one make some investment and put it in hand of God if you make profit or loss. God dey.

2 Likes

Re: The Lady In My Life, My Burden. by golddare: 2:56pm On Jul 28, 2020
1. Continue doing what you can for her God knows how to reward you.
2. Help out of love and not out of responsibility that's when your heart will not be burdened.
3. Let her be more useful in building your laundry business, the business can grow to the level of solving your problems.
4. Dont assumed she will marry you so that you will not be heartbroken in the future.
5. Dont give yourself high BP, some problems will solve with time.
Re: The Lady In My Life, My Burden. by Willokafor(m): 2:56pm On Jul 28, 2020
I only have two advice for you:
1. Go to the nearest C. I. D office and track the phone, it will only cost u #10 thousand naira.
2. The girl has been helping you in the shop and i am optimistic u cant run ur business and ur hospital job at a time.
So, for that single reason, have a chat with her on how you will be cutting down some expenses and financial privileges she has been enjoying from u henceforth because of the economic turmoil caused by covid-19 pandemic. You had to be courageous to achieve these.

1 Like

Re: The Lady In My Life, My Burden. by Jaqenhghar: 2:57pm On Jul 28, 2020
LordNicvuitton:


Why would you think that it's a story? Look my profile, I've been on Nairaland since 2010. Go through my previous posts. This is why i suggested that only matured minds should rub minds with me.
.you will just kill yourself for nothing. Invest in your business. Shey if you invest you will be able to afford to buy her laptop sef. At this rate your businesses will fail then what? You will steal to take care of her?

3 Likes

Re: The Lady In My Life, My Burden. by mariahAngel(f): 2:57pm On Jul 28, 2020
NockMedia:
I feel for anyone that falls for this story. Nice try grin

You type the most foolish things. undecided

Is it that hard for your simple mind to discern a real experience from a fake story?
Re: The Lady In My Life, My Burden. by Jaqenhghar: 2:58pm On Jul 28, 2020
LordNicvuitton:
Hi Romancelanders, don't know if it's right to share this topic here, but I'll do for now.

I'm Victory, from the East and currently a resident of Edo state. I came to this state, as an intern and thereafter, still served here and in the course of all these, I thought out and established a laundry business, which is just about 8 months old. This was to keep life going and to better bond well with the lady in my life currently.

While in Edo state, having rounded my internship & kickstarting service sometime around 2017, I met this Kiki Osemudiamen (Name changed), and it was nothing serious at 1st, cos I never really thought I'd date someone here, fact is that I never thought I'd stay beyond my service year. I met her while she was in 200l. We encouraged each other, she saw potentials and had faith in me just like I have so much faith in her. She is simplistic, encourages me to save and I in turn, encouraged her and guided her through some of her studies. She passed her 2nd MB.BS. and is currently awaiting lifting of the lockdown on schools, so she can start her clinicals.

Problem is that she came from a not buoyant family financially, and although both parents are alive, she struggles to survive/feed daily. Her dad supplies about 1000litres/trip water to households, while her mum sells at the local market. I on the other hand, came from a middle class family but my Dad is late since 2012, and I've been a sponsor of my education and that of my younger ones through the lil I inherited (which mum manages for now) plus my various endeavours. She depends on me for daily meals and other basic essentials, in fact I had to place her on salary in my laundry shop during this lockdown, so she plays the role of secretary in my shop too.

The latest challenge came about, yesterday. While she slept in the shop, I was out on errand, someone sneaked into the shop and stole her android phone with all of her e-medics textbooks (she reads mostly e-copies because she can't afford hardcopies), she has been crying all through and I really don't know what to do. Since I knew her, She'd been an appendage and an extra financial burden to me, I can't begin to list what I've done for her, although I kept reminding her never to not have entitlement mentality and she does appreciate. Out of desperation to ease her pain, I promised to sponsor her in getting a new phone. I have burdens, huge ones, I'm yet to acquire a diesel engine for my laundry (I use ponytail industrial iron which has higher voltage/current than normal ones), plus other related merchandise that I need to set up and I feel like she slows down my financial pace.

Honestly, I don't do all these for her, hoping for any personal gains, in the words of my daddy in the Lord, Prophet T.B. Joshua, He said and I quote: "We make a living by what we get and we make a life by what we give" but I am almost fed up and tired, especially when I remember that both her parents are still alive.. I am scared that that for the 1st time, I may fail her in that financial obligation because I honestly need money now, with the whole pandemic issue plus, I feel like she slows me down in life financially and a huge burden to me. Right now, she's so attached to me, more so that when I initially wanted to hault our relationship, it almost nearly affected her academics negatively. Please I need matured minds to help me think this through and garnish me with advice(s) because I almost feel so choked up and a rising urge to relocate from here, so i can breathe again.

NB: Advice from married couples and those in serious relationships, will be highly appreciated.

Modified: She went to her bank (First bank) this morning, only to be informed that about 20k (Her mum's business money) has been used to purchase recharge voucher. Her mum sends/receives money from distant customers through her account. Yesterday's scenario, all over again. Please folks, lock your SIM cards just as much as you lock your phones. Learn from this painful experience please.
I learnt the bitter way with people who bad news seem to follow them always. My guy run

2 Likes

Re: The Lady In My Life, My Burden. by Jotrade: 2:58pm On Jul 28, 2020
Both of you are from poor home

2 Likes

Re: The Lady In My Life, My Burden. by instinct57vm(m): 2:59pm On Jul 28, 2020
LordNicvuitton:
Hi Romancelanders, don't know if it's right to share this topic here, but I'll do for now.

I'm Victory, from the East and currently a resident of Edo state. I came to this state, as an intern and thereafter, still served here and in the course of all these, I thought out and established a laundry business, which is just about 8 months old. This was to keep life going and to better bond well with the lady in my life currently.

While in Edo state, having rounded my internship & kickstarting service sometime around 2017, I met this Kiki Osemudiamen (Name changed), and it was nothing serious at 1st, cos I never really thought I'd date someone here, fact is that I never thought I'd stay beyond my service year. I met her while she was in 200l. We encouraged each other, she saw potentials and had faith in me just like I have so much faith in her. She is simplistic, encourages me to save and I in turn, encouraged her and guided her through some of her studies. She passed her 2nd MB.BS. and is currently awaiting lifting of the lockdown on schools, so she can start her clinicals.

Problem is that she came from a not buoyant family financially, and although both parents are alive, she struggles to survive/feed daily. Her dad supplies about 1000litres/trip water to households, while her mum sells at the local market. I on the other hand, came from a middle class family but my Dad is late since 2012, and I've been a sponsor of my education and that of my younger ones through the lil I inherited (which mum manages for now) plus my various endeavours. She depends on me for daily meals and other basic essentials, in fact I had to place her on salary in my laundry shop during this lockdown, so she plays the role of secretary in my shop too.

The latest challenge came about, yesterday. While she slept in the shop, I was out on errand, someone sneaked into the shop and stole her android phone with all of her e-medics textbooks (she reads mostly e-copies because she can't afford hardcopies), she has been crying all through and I really don't know what to do. Since I knew her, She'd been an appendage and an extra financial burden to me, I can't begin to list what I've done for her, although I kept reminding her never to not have entitlement mentality and she does appreciate. Out of desperation to ease her pain, I promised to sponsor her in getting a new phone. I have burdens, huge ones, I'm yet to acquire a diesel engine for my laundry (I use ponytail industrial iron which has higher voltage/current than normal ones), plus other related merchandise that I need to set up and I feel like she slows down my financial pace.

Honestly, I don't do all these for her, hoping for any personal gains, in the words of my daddy in the Lord, Prophet T.B. Joshua, He said and I quote: "We make a living by what we get and we make a life by what we give" but I am almost fed up and tired, especially when I remember that both her parents are still alive.. I am scared that that for the 1st time, I may fail her in that financial obligation because I honestly need money now, with the whole pandemic issue plus, I feel like she slows me down in life financially and a huge burden to me. Right now, she's so attached to me, more so that when I initially wanted to hault our relationship, it almost nearly affected her academics negatively. Please I need matured minds to help me think this through and garnish me with advice(s) because I almost feel so choked up and a rising urge to relocate from here, so i can breathe again.

NB: Advice from married couples and those in serious relationships, will be highly appreciated.

Modified: She went to her bank (First bank) this morning, only to be informed that about 20k (Her mum's business money) has been used to purchase recharge voucher. Her mum sends/receives money from distant customers through her account. Yesterday's scenario, all over again. Please folks, lock your SIM cards just as much as you lock your phones. Learn from this painful experience please.

Placing a girl on a salary is wrong and not sustainable. Desist from such act, get ur financial liberation and thank me later.
PS: You may support financially randomly If u wish, with little amount that wouldn’t affect u but pls know that it is not ur DUTY!

6 Likes

Re: The Lady In My Life, My Burden. by YelloweWest: 3:02pm On Jul 28, 2020
AerialMapper:
All i see is you complaining about all you do and give and whinging about yourself

Please spare a thought for her and what she is giving...unless she isnt giving anything.

If you really and truly love someone, you will not complain about doing what you are doing!

Anyway, grow her and grow yourself; tomorrow she will be a Medical Professional and i hope you'd be a big player in the laundry industry else....
The truth is she will most likely dump him because of his attitude and I can't blame her.
Re: The Lady In My Life, My Burden. by Raymeg7(m): 3:03pm On Jul 28, 2020
LordNicvuitton:
Hi Romancelanders, don't know if it's right to share this topic here, but I'll do for now.

I'm Victory, from the East and currently a resident of Edo state. I came to this state, as an intern and thereafter, still served here and in the course of all these, I thought out and established a laundry business, which is just about 8 months old. This was to keep life going and to better bond well with the lady in my life currently.

While in Edo state, having rounded my internship & kickstarting service sometime around 2017, I met this Kiki Osemudiamen (Name changed), and it was nothing serious at 1st, cos I never really thought I'd date someone here, fact is that I never thought I'd stay beyond my service year. I met her while she was in 200l. We encouraged each other, she saw potentials and had faith in me just like I have so much faith in her. She is simplistic, encourages me to save and I in turn, encouraged her and guided her through some of her studies. She passed her 2nd MB.BS. and is currently awaiting lifting of the lockdown on schools, so she can start her clinicals.

Problem is that she came from a not buoyant family financially, and although both parents are alive, she struggles to survive/feed daily. Her dad supplies about 1000litres/trip water to households, while her mum sells at the local market. I on the other hand, came from a middle class family but my Dad is late since 2012, and I've been a sponsor of my education and that of my younger ones through the lil I inherited (which mum manages for now) plus my various endeavours. She depends on me for daily meals and other basic essentials, in fact I had to place her on salary in my laundry shop during this lockdown, so she plays the role of secretary in my shop too.

The latest challenge came about, yesterday. While she slept in the shop, I was out on errand, someone sneaked into the shop and stole her android phone with all of her e-medics textbooks (she reads mostly e-copies because she can't afford hardcopies), she has been crying all through and I really don't know what to do. Since I knew her, She'd been an appendage and an extra financial burden to me, I can't begin to list what I've done for her, although I kept reminding her never to not have entitlement mentality and she does appreciate. Out of desperation to ease her pain, I promised to sponsor her in getting a new phone. I have burdens, huge ones, I'm yet to acquire a diesel engine for my laundry (I use ponytail industrial iron which has higher voltage/current than normal ones), plus other related merchandise that I need to set up and I feel like she slows down my financial pace.

Honestly, I don't do all these for her, hoping for any personal gains, in the words of my daddy in the Lord, Prophet T.B. Joshua, He said and I quote: "We make a living by what we get and we make a life by what we give" but I am almost fed up and tired, especially when I remember that both her parents are still alive.. I am scared that that for the 1st time, I may fail her in that financial obligation because I honestly need money now, with the whole pandemic issue plus, I feel like she slows me down in life financially and a huge burden to me. Right now, she's so attached to me, more so that when I initially wanted to hault our relationship, it almost nearly affected her academics negatively. Please I need matured minds to help me think this through and garnish me with advice(s) because I almost feel so choked up and a rising urge to relocate from here, so i can breathe again.

NB: Advice from married couples and those in serious relationships, will be highly appreciated.

Modified: She went to her bank (First bank) this morning, only to be informed that about 20k (Her mum's business money) has been used to purchase recharge voucher. Her mum sends/receives money from distant customers through her account. Yesterday's scenario, all over again. Please folks, lock your SIM cards just as much as you lock your phones. Learn from this painful experience please.
my brother most of us has been in that shoe, is not easy at all, what I will advise u is, get her that phone, reduce the way u promise, don't be too quick to promise, and try and get her another job, because been there with u, means that she knows how much u make it how much u worth, so I advice u to get her another job, but for feeding, I don't think is a big deal, some of us that was lucky end up marring our girl friends after school, since then, I thank God for bring her towards me, I live with my girl friend in school, her dad is late is only her mum a teacher that was taken care of her and her siblings, it was not easy, I help in one way or the other, but I don't count it because I believe God will pay me back, never knew I will marry her, she is a gift from God, even then I don't have, I hustle for us to eat, I don't have anybody to give me, but from my hustling we both eat pay school fees and house rent, today she is my wife, a blessing from above

2 Likes

Re: The Lady In My Life, My Burden. by Lorenzop: 3:04pm On Jul 28, 2020
LordNicvuitton:


Her relatives occasionally send her clothes and shoes, that's it. Her wealthier relatives according to her, try to limit communication with them, same reason she was convinced within herself to go study medicine, so she can help her family.

ahh..so she is studying medicine ?

bros...if you really love her, engage and marry her else that lady will leave you after graduation coz many men wil be after her given she has graduated. Marry or leave her now to avoid had i known

5 Likes

Re: The Lady In My Life, My Burden. by Nobody: 3:05pm On Jul 28, 2020
LordNicvuitton:


I appreciate your kind input. She actually does the laundry in my absence (I work in a hospital within that area) so that when I'm back, I steam and package the clothes, just that i foot her daily meal and daily transport and then pay her monthly. She asked me for it, instead of her staying at home and she also knows that she won't get those extra privileges elsewhere, that she gets from me.
You want to marry a doc, then you will carry the burden.
Re: The Lady In My Life, My Burden. by earnit1: 3:06pm On Jul 28, 2020
oh
Re: The Lady In My Life, My Burden. by winkmart: 3:06pm On Jul 28, 2020
mumu
Re: The Lady In My Life, My Burden. by jaxxy(m): 3:06pm On Jul 28, 2020
LordNicvuitton:
Hi Romancelanders, don't know if it's right to share this topic here, but I'll do for now.

I'm Victory, from the East and currently a resident of Edo state. I came to this state, as an intern and thereafter, still served here and in the course of all these, I thought out and established a laundry business, which is just about 8 months old. This was to keep life going and to better bond well with the lady in my life currently.

While in Edo state, having rounded my internship & kickstarting service sometime around 2017, I met this Kiki Osemudiamen (Name changed), and it was nothing serious at 1st, cos I never really thought I'd date someone here, fact is that I never thought I'd stay beyond my service year. I met her while she was in 200l. We encouraged each other, she saw potentials and had faith in me just like I have so much faith in her. She is simplistic, encourages me to save and I in turn, encouraged her and guided her through some of her studies. She passed her 2nd MB.BS. and is currently awaiting lifting of the lockdown on schools, so she can start her clinicals.

Problem is that she came from a not buoyant family financially, and although both parents are alive, she struggles to survive/feed daily. Her dad supplies about 1000litres/trip water to households, while her mum sells at the local market. I on the other hand, came from a middle class family but my Dad is late since 2012, and I've been a sponsor of my education and that of my younger ones through the lil I inherited (which mum manages for now) plus my various endeavours. She depends on me for daily meals and other basic essentials, in fact I had to place her on salary in my laundry shop during this lockdown, so she plays the role of secretary in my shop too.

The latest challenge came about, yesterday. While she slept in the shop, I was out on errand, someone sneaked into the shop and stole her android phone with all of her e-medics textbooks (she reads mostly e-copies because she can't afford hardcopies), she has been crying all through and I really don't know what to do. Since I knew her, She'd been an appendage and an extra financial burden to me, I can't begin to list what I've done for her, although I kept reminding her never to not have entitlement mentality and she does appreciate. Out of desperation to ease her pain, I promised to sponsor her in getting a new phone. I have burdens, huge ones, I'm yet to acquire a diesel engine for my laundry (I use ponytail industrial iron which has higher voltage/current than normal ones), plus other related merchandise that I need to set up and I feel like she slows down my financial pace.

Honestly, I don't do all these for her, hoping for any personal gains, in the words of my daddy in the Lord, Prophet T.B. Joshua, He said and I quote: "We make a living by what we get and we make a life by what we give" but I am almost fed up and tired, especially when I remember that both her parents are still alive.. I am scared that that for the 1st time, I may fail her in that financial obligation because I honestly need money now, with the whole pandemic issue plus, I feel like she slows me down in life financially and a huge burden to me. Right now, she's so attached to me, more so that when I initially wanted to hault our relationship, it almost nearly affected her academics negatively. Please I need matured minds to help me think this through and garnish me with advice(s) because I almost feel so choked up and a rising urge to relocate from here, so i can breathe again.

NB: Advice from married couples and those in serious relationships, will be highly appreciated.

Modified: She went to her bank (First bank) this morning, only to be informed that about 20k (Her mum's business money) has been used to purchase recharge voucher. Her mum sends/receives money from distant customers through her account. Yesterday's scenario, all over again. Please folks, lock your SIM cards just as much as you lock your phones. Learn from this painful experience please.

The problem isn’t that u are supporting her bt rather that she is careless and by that the little support she brings which is positive gets nilled off and even becomes negative.

Now the greatest here is that it keeps reoccurring. Meaning she needs to check herself. It’s not normal for wrong or problematic events to keep occurring around u. It cud be as a result of different things. Habits, insensitivity, naivety, stubbornness or even spiritual and then u basically need to be more prayerful.

Also pls note salary is earned not dashed. undecided

Be observant!

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