ocelot2006:

What happened to the sacred institution called marriage ?, Lord help us,

Roland17:

if he was bold and courageous enough to confess and seek apology from you, why feel inferior? go ahead and do same thing, especially if you want peace of mind, which i can assure you money can't buy. the longer you take and time passes, the worse you are making conditions,

Iysayah:

na wao, where my gun at? to a woman that does such to me.

monkeyleg:

@IyaBasira,

I think it is unfair to take a stand without hearing the other side of the story, and we may never. Infidelity in marriage is a serious issue, and I dont believe in concealing these things. It has happend and both parties must face up to the consequence. That is the only way in my opinion that the root cause can be known at healing can begin

~Minx~:

@ Iyabasira,

I hear what you are saying about the truth but i don't have any guarantee that he will accept it and forgive me, what if he doesn't? What then?

Yes I was wrong I shouldn't have been involved with the other guy at all but it just happened, I didn't plan for it to happen and I sincerely regret it but I don't think telling him is going to make things any easier.

IyaBasira:

I dont care about the other side of the story. I'm not going to be perfect and you are not going to be perfect, but we bloody took vows to forsake all others.

As far as i am concerned, there is only one reason why a man should cheat on me. And that reason is if i have cheated on him first.

If I did no such thing, then he has no excuse. At least the poster took her business elsewhere. He slept with a family FRIEND.

The reason why I said he is a jerk is because he probably cannot say that he never slept with anyone while he was single. And yet he has the nerve to throw it in her face that she has slept with other men. Abeeeegi I no like dat kain thing. Nigerian man and their wretched double standards.
If he was a virgin when he met her, then yes I can understand his insecurity. But if not then please he needs to get over himself.

Also, I don't know if you read my post well because I never said she should conceal it. I said I wouldn't bother tying to make that relationship work, and even if I did, I would tell him the truth. That was what i was trying to say.

Thats why I said u and I are different. I prefer to cut my losses and move on. But then I am single and this is obviously a marriage that you are talking about, which makes it a more serious issue. You obviously want to try and make things work and that's fine.  All I am asking is for you to be prepared because he may just find out one of these days. Ermmm,  sorry I need to ask. Have you figured out whose infidelity came first?

Fhemmmy:

Will she be allowed to do same to you, if you cheat on her too?

Iysayah:

of course, if she's gat the guts to do it why not . we pout the gun where we can both see it. fully loaded. I cant imagine living with the horrible memory of what another man has done to my prized possession! .
reminds me of the movie-Best man. I go kill person!

@poster. . . It's stories like these that strengthen my resolve to remain unmarried. Anyways the answer to your question lies in this website : www.womensinfidelity.com

Iysayah:

of course, if she's gat the guts to do it why not . we pout the gun where we can both see it. fully loaded. I cant imagine living with the horrible memory of what another man has done to my prized possession! .
reminds me of the movie-Best man. I go kill person!

Iysayah:

na wao, where my gun at? to a woman that does such to me.

~Minx~:

FYI I am not Nigerian, just came to this forum because I have seen really good advice here previously

About whose fidelity came first I am not sure at the moment. And my husband only apologised after I had seen raunchy messages and unexplained credit card transactions. He didn't even confess as such until I cornered him and threatened to go to the woman's house to make a scene. It's not like he just came up and opened up.

Yes we had a child outside marriage but we got married afterwards.

kabukabu50:

How dum.b is this guy^^^^^^


Really?You make a sorry excuse of  a man,

Hello,they are both cheating,doesn't matter who started it, so they both need to open up together, its batbrained dudes like you that believe its ok for men to cheat,but women to stay loyal to their cheating husbands

nisaac:

IMHO, i think you dont need to confess to your hubby, confess your sins to God, ask for His forgiveness, the grace to breakout of that relationship and a rejuvination in your marriage. You need to get close to your maker now,He's willing to help if only u are willing to repent.

~Minx~:

FYI I am not Nigerian, just came to this forum because I have seen really good advice here previously

About whose fidelity came first I am not sure at the moment. And my husband only apologised after I had seen raunchy messages and unexplained credit card transactions. He didn't even confess as such until I cornered him and threatened to go to the woman's house to make a scene. It's not like he just came up and opened up.

Yes we had a child outside marriage but we got married afterwards.

macfarland:



I dont think you are a marriage material from day one!

tellwisdom:

Mehn!!, i really understand hw you feel, BUT MY ADVISE FOR YOU IS, , DONT TELL YOUR MAN OOOOOOOO!  GBESE NLA, ok??  #ONCODE

~Minx~  :

My husband is a very difficult person when it comes to infidelity issues, telling him will break any hope of reconciliation. He still has problems with the fact that I slept with other men before we got married he says when he thinks about it it disturbs him now imagine having to tell him that I slept with someone else now? It would break him.

WhyAWhy:

This is exactly what I always said,  The fact that some or many guys have been digging your babe before you married changes EVERYTHING.

I have a feeling that having a bad sex life started from the fact that your husband doesn't feel to proud of what he's digging knowing that it's Tokunbo

I advocate for no sex before marriage (for both man and woman),  but infidelity in marriage should be rewarded by "firing Squad".

Wow,  this are times in life I wish I can give out CTRL + Z. Not everyone is marriage material,  if there's a qualifying exam before marriage,  I wonder how many will pass.

Don't do Don't do !!! Dem no go hear.