Kobojunkie:
Again, try to stay away from topics you have little to no understanding of to begin with. Nothing of your dealings with your parents have to do with the Kingdom of God is what Jesus Christ teaches.

The Old Covenant Law of Moses was given instead as national constitution to those of the Nation of Israel, a nation that is of this here world and that contracts only bind those descended from the blood of Jacob, and the strangers that live among them in the land.

I am obviously not the sick one here since you are the one assuming children slaves of their parents. In other cultures around the world, parents infact owe their children an inheritance when they die. This is closer to the culture of the israelites in the bible than the hogwash you spew of how you owe your own parents for taking the responsibility that is you.

DeepSight:
You owe your parents nothing but happy to quip about how in other cultures parents owe you an inheritance.
You're simply twisted upstairs.
You should be isolated from civilization.
Sicko.

Spherical77:
As in eh, some people will be busy doing evil, committing crime and atrocities but alwalways have it at the back of their mind say na forgiveness go end am. They will start preaching to eer is human and forgive is divine. I wonder if these people think others too don't know how to do evil or comit crime and ask for forgiveness. Seriously we Africans still have a long way to go

Kobojunkie:
Quip? No, simply stating that your culture is not the all and all out there.

Just so you know, if you don't already realize it by now, insulting me oy proves that you are indeed as small-minded as you appear and were probably raised.

DeepSight:
Insult ke? Far be it from me to point out that you are the filthiest and most depraved scum of the earth, worth less than the sweat from the balls of an orangutan, and a complete waste of the energies of your forebears.

I would never say such.
I am too polite.

Kobojunkie:
Where do you get these bullsheet ideas from abeg?

100s of thousands, world over, wed each year without even a family member present at the occasion and they go on to enjoy marital bliss after it all. Why is it that it is when you Nigerians are involved that disorder becomes the order of the day?

dannex4adx:
You're still a baby! You don't know anything.

Simran94:

Then she can as well move on from the guy.
Couples aren’t meant to keep secrets from each other. Secrets ends up destroying a home.

Jennyclay:
Good afternoon nairalanders and Happy new year to everyone. I promise to be brief.

My fiance and I hv been dating for 2 years. He's doing well for himself, he's humble, he's quick to apologize even when you're at fault. He calls his mom and siblings regularly, but he don't talk to his Dad. If I ask, he would say forget about him

My fiance has been keeping malice with his father for 3 years now. I don't know what transpired between them because he would never tell me. He act like his father doesn't exist.

His mom and I do talk on phone once in a while. Yesterday I called her to wish her happy new year, we spoke well and she prayed for me. Abt 10 mins later she called back, but this time she was crying, She explained how his son has not been talking to his Father, she said this year 2022 would make it 3 years, she said they have called elders and pastors to talk to him but all to no avail. She said It would be her greatest joy if I also help her talk to him since he loves me so much. We were on the phone for over 45min.

Nairalanders, he's coming to seek my hand in marriage by March but I'm scared and here are my reasons. 1) His he pretending to be nice to me 2) what if we have little misunderstanding when we get married will he forgive me or keep malice with me for years

I was so angry at him, I told him that I'm giving him now till month end to reconcile every conflict or dispute he has with his father else I'm calling our relationship a quit, because this character seems to be a redflag to me. He started begging me, he said I don't understand yet he's not telling me anything.

I'm really confused. Please help a sister.

Jennyclay:
Good afternoon nairalanders and Happy new year to everyone. I promise to be brief.

My fiance and I hv been dating for 2 years. He's doing well for himself, he's humble, he's quick to apologize even when you're at fault. He calls his mom and siblings regularly, but he don't talk to his Dad. If I ask, he would say forget about him

My fiance has been keeping malice with his father for 3 years now. I don't know what transpired between them because he would never tell me. He act like his father doesn't exist.

His mom and I do talk on phone once in a while. Yesterday I called her to wish her happy new year, we spoke well and she prayed for me. Abt 10 mins later she called back, but this time she was crying, She explained how his son has not been talking to his Father, she said this year 2022 would make it 3 years, she said they have called elders and pastors to talk to him but all to no avail. She said It would be her greatest joy if I also help her talk to him since he loves me so much. We were on the phone for over 45min.

Nairalanders, he's coming to seek my hand in marriage by March but I'm scared and here are my reasons. 1) His he pretending to be nice to me 2) what if we have little misunderstanding when we get married will he forgive me or keep malice with me for years

I was so angry at him, I told him that I'm giving him now till month end to reconcile every conflict or dispute he has with his father else I'm calling our relationship a quit, because this character seems to be a redflag to me. He started begging me, he said I don't understand yet he's not telling me anything.

I'm really confused. Please help a sister.

Jennyclay:
Good afternoon nairalanders and Happy new year to everyone. I promise to be brief.

My fiance and I hv been dating for 2 years. He's doing well for himself, he's humble, he's quick to apologize even when you're at fault. He calls his mom and siblings regularly, but he don't talk to his Dad. If I ask, he would say forget about him

My fiance has been keeping malice with his father for 3 years now. I don't know what transpired between them because he would never tell me. He act like his father doesn't exist.

His mom and I do talk on phone once in a while. Yesterday I called her to wish her happy new year, we spoke well and she prayed for me. Abt 10 mins later she called back, but this time she was crying, She explained how his son has not been talking to his Father, she said this year 2022 would make it 3 years, she said they have called elders and pastors to talk to him but all to no avail. She said It would be her greatest joy if I also help her talk to him since he loves me so much. We were on the phone for over 45min.

Nairalanders, he's coming to seek my hand in marriage by March but I'm scared and here are my reasons. 1) His he pretending to be nice to me 2) what if we have little misunderstanding when we get married will he forgive me or keep malice with me for years

I was so angry at him, I told him that I'm giving him now till month end to reconcile every conflict or dispute he has with his father else I'm calling our relationship a quit, because this character seems to be a redflag to me. He started begging me, he said I don't understand yet he's not telling me anything.

I'm really confused. Please help a sister.

Jennyclay:
I came from a respectful home and I can't imagine myself or my brothers keeping malice with my dad.

What if he restrict me from calling his father and I refused, won't their be problem? I'm so scared. I don't want my future in-laws to look at me like a witch or something...

superCleanworks:
it is kind of an incomplete story.. if You had a 45 mins phone call with the mother of the boy and she could not tell you what the father did to make the boy go into ghost mode. it is common for men (father and son) to have disagreements but 3 years? the sins of the father must be too damaging for the mother to even tell you what it is.
so how about the father? or is it only the mother you say hello to? did the mother ever mention what the cause of the matter is or is she only after termination of malice? because if the root cause is not addressed then there will NEVER EVER be actual peace and the hatred will always exist even if they start to exchange words again and this is still as good as malice.

firstly, you can not enter such a contaminated circle without knowing what is really going on. so no wedding talks for now

so i think the wiser path to follow would be for you to make the guy tell you what happened.
when he eventually tells you what happened, DO NOT make the mistake of downplaying his reasons no matter how stuupid the reasons may seem to you. instead, you should pay attention and plead on behalf of his father. forcing him to end malice will only generate hidden hatred which is more dangerous.

Kobojunkie:
ROFLMAO


Haven't been called a baby in a very long while.

So you don’t think me a baby for admitting that these ideas are hogwash after all is said and done?

Kobojunkie:
ROFLMAO


Haven't been called a baby in a very long while.

So you don’t think me a baby for admitting that these ideas are hogwash after all is said and done?

Jennyclay:
Good afternoon nairalanders and Happy new year to everyone. I promise to be brief.

My fiance and I hv been dating for 2 years. He's doing well for himself, he's humble, he's quick to apologize even when you're at fault. He calls his mom and siblings regularly, but he don't talk to his Dad. If I ask, he would say forget about him
Is not your business to threaten him, you can only persuade him with some point don't be a defender on issue that not concerned you

My fiance has been keeping malice with his father for 3 years now. I don't know what transpired between them because he would never tell me. He act like his father doesn't exist.

His mom and I do talk on phone once in a while. Yesterday I called her to wish her happy new year, we spoke well and she prayed for me. Abt 10 mins later she called back, but this time she was crying, She explained how his son has not been talking to his Father, she said this year 2022 would make it 3 years, she said they have called elders and pastors to talk to him but all to no avail. She said It would be her greatest joy if I also help her talk to him since he loves me so much. We were on the phone for over 45min.

Nairalanders, he's coming to seek my hand in marriage by March but I'm scared and here are my reasons. 1) His he pretending to be nice to me 2) what if we have little misunderstanding when we get married will he forgive me or keep malice with me for years

I was so angry at him, I told him that I'm giving him now till month end to reconcile every conflict or dispute he has with his father else I'm calling our relationship a quit, because this character seems to be a redflag to me. He started begging me, he said I don't understand yet he's not telling me anything.

I'm really confused. Please help a sister.

drnoel:


Home. Which home? You are moving too fast. He hasn't married her yet, he is only going now to do something on her head so which home is it that you are talking about.
Women should attempt to restrict themselves to the position they have being allowed at every point in time.
She has no say in the matter till he gives her a say.

Jennyclay:
Good afternoon nairalanders and Happy new year to everyone. I promise to be brief.

My fiance and I hv been dating for 2 years. He's doing well for himself, he's humble, he's quick to apologize even when you're at fault. He calls his mom and siblings regularly, but he don't talk to his Dad. If I ask, he would say forget about him

My fiance has been keeping malice with his father for 3 years now. I don't know what transpired between them because he would never tell me. He act like his father doesn't exist.

His mom and I do talk on phone once in a while. Yesterday I called her to wish her happy new year, we spoke well and she prayed for me. Abt 10 mins later she called back, but this time she was crying, She explained how his son has not been talking to his Father, she said this year 2022 would make it 3 years, she said they have called elders and pastors to talk to him but all to no avail. She said It would be her greatest joy if I also help her talk to him since he loves me so much. We were on the phone for over 45min.

Nairalanders, he's coming to seek my hand in marriage by March but I'm scared and here are my reasons. 1) His he pretending to be nice to me 2) what if we have little misunderstanding when we get married will he forgive me or keep malice with me for years

I was so angry at him, I told him that I'm giving him now till month end to reconcile every conflict or dispute he has with his father else I'm calling our relationship a quit, because this character seems to be a redflag to me. He started begging me, he said I don't understand yet he's not telling me anything.

I'm really confused. Please help a sister.

Jennyclay:
Good afternoon nairalanders and Happy new year to everyone. I promise to be brief.

My fiance and I hv been dating for 2 years. He's doing well for himself, he's humble, he's quick to apologize even when you're at fault. He calls his mom and siblings regularly, but he don't talk to his Dad. If I ask, he would say forget about him

My fiance has been keeping malice with his father for 3 years now. I don't know what transpired between them because he would never tell me. He act like his father doesn't exist.

His mom and I do talk on phone once in a while. Yesterday I called her to wish her happy new year, we spoke well and she prayed for me. Abt 10 mins later she called back, but this time she was crying, She explained how his son has not been talking to his Father, she said this year 2022 would make it 3 years, she said they have called elders and pastors to talk to him but all to no avail. She said It would be her greatest joy if I also help her talk to him since he loves me so much. We were on the phone for over 45min.

Nairalanders, he's coming to seek my hand in marriage by March but I'm scared and here are my reasons. 1) His he pretending to be nice to me 2) what if we have little misunderstanding when we get married will he forgive me or keep malice with me for years

I was so angry at him, I told him that I'm giving him now till month end to reconcile every conflict or dispute he has with his father else I'm calling our relationship a quit, because this character seems to be a redflag to me. He started begging me, he said I don't understand yet he's not telling me anything.

I'm really confused. Please help a sister.

Simran94:

Read my post again and understand carefully.
He and his mom want to go and meet her parents, which means he wants to ask for her hand in marriage. What happens after this? Wedding plans will begin
Some people were saying she should go ahead and marry the guy like that and she shouldn’t interfere in his issue with his dad. What I said is that if she ends up marrying that guy without knowing the reason why he hates his father this much, then their marriage might not last because there will be secrets between them and secrets destroys a home.

Why would any reasonable woman marry into a family where there is hatred and lots of secrets? Her own marriage with the guy will definitely be at risk too.

TeeFriz:
You see ladies and self centrism A mother called you to help intercede and all you could think of is to apply it to yourself and your relationship with your fiance. Do these people think? Even gave him ultimatum Nawa o.

Even if he isn't telling you what transpired between him and his dad, there should be other ways to get answers and know how best to bring peace between them. After all the mom brought the issue with you, why can't you start with her?

You don't even know what the dad did or what could have happened! Nawa o

May we marry knowledgeable wives o

Dextre:



You ladies can make rash decisions sha. You gave him an ultimatum, just imagine nonsense yarns. As his partner, you should sit him down and try to hear him out, talmbout giving ultimatum, God nor allow you use your hand end your relationship, your eye go clear then

Dextre:


Honestly brother, I’m in awe of how some ladies think. Are we not doomed in this country like this with these types of women flocking around

Konjiboi:
That's a major red flag. Cut off the relationship.

Even if he reconciles before March as you gave him the ultimatum, he won't be doing it from his heart but because he wants to get married.

A man who can do such with his own father? Young lady, you're in shark-infested water.

And he's also secretive. He doesn't want to tell you what transpired. Such a man can undo and do.

A broken relationship is better than a broken marriage. Don't rush into marriage because you think you're getting old or because you've been with him for 2 years.

You can rush into marriage and rush out too if it's with the wrong person.

Be wise.

God Bless you.

drnoel:


How does her marriage with the guy have to do with his relationship with his dad? There is no relationship with one or the other.
And like I stated earlier, she hasn't been brought into the guy's family and she is already making assumptions and demands of him. This for me is a red flag and reason for him to rethink even giving her a ring.
Women should learn their limits and not to involve issues unless their explicit advice is asked for.