tensazangetsu20:
So long as you made the selfish decision to have children, you are completely responsible for them till you die. As if they are sharing high paying jobs in Nigeria.

Munzy14:

The honest truth is that the money is not there..When a child starts earning, the first show love to their parents, before extending to a lover/life partner.

Again, it depends on how you trained them, did you raised them in a way they must accept responsibilities? Were you the type of parent that is always giving?. If so, he has become comfortable with that..

Nowadays I don't have money is no longer excuse, we have many ways of making legit money...That teaching can deceive people a lot and push the person to poverty with comfortable mind.

With current economy of Nigeria, teaching that is not in the tertiary institutions shouldn't be for a man.

It is mainly a woman thing now, as she will use it to support her man.

Lastly,don't put pressure on him, some human move at their own pace...depression is real...Allow him work at his own pace and grace...Talk to him às your fellow man...He must assume responsibility now..if he can't now, I doubt if any woman can tolerate that..make him understand things he learn now, will be what he is going to live with when he marries.

Richy4:


Oga the money not being there is not an excuse... A son that had a liberal mind to give will make an effort to give and help the situation no matter how small...If he makes an effort with the little he has, it will give the father the assurance that if he had more based on his financial situation,he will do more... and I believe his dad wouldn't have been here to ask for solutions from his fellow young people like US ..

What about little domestic chores like mowing the lawn? Cleaning the house? Buying even an item as small as detergent powder for family use... Does that also require millions as well?...

He earns little and could not open his eyes to see a struggling father at his age, is it when he starts earning millions that he will do it?

Since he can't see the situation on ground on his own, he should be meant to see it clearly by every possible means...

Desusi:
Naira landers, kindly advise me on what to do.lam over 60 years old, a widower. By the grace of God,l was blessed with three children of which two are graduates with good grades from reputable universities here Nigeria, one is still undergraduate before the departure of my late wife some years back. As a retired man with meager money,l decided to manage a little business which barely give me much money. One of these my children,a professional, though not teacher, is currently residing with me doing teaching job in different places as part time, pending when he would get a much better job. We are living in my personal house.l would single handedly pay electricity bills,lawnman,etc .My son would not want to help in any way,not even with pure water of #10 claiming that he is with his father.Efforts to convince him to assist me is not yielding positive result, instead he would pick quarrels with me.His senior sister has married, while the junior brother is still in the school as dependant, what sort of counseling do you think he need to change. Iam afraid even if this boy owns chop rite in future, he would not help either.

Mariangeles:


The bolded should've been the main point.
I think that is where the problem lies.

How can you say the money is not there, when he works?
No matter how little he earns, at the end of every month, he should be able to say nna m, jide nke a. That is being a responsible adult.

Golan007:


This one is still doing "Mummy, thank you" after breakfast, lunch and dinner.

AdenolaBlessing:

Well-done. You'll also have a son that you'll be taking care of till old age. Then you'll realize the pain the man is going through

Senomii:

So many graduates are moving about with this same idealogy eventually they get frustrated and run into yahoo n rituals...... infact 60% of people just to them fend for themselves and become independent most are into yahoo, runz and illegal stuff

Munzy14:

Like you said, a son that has a liberal mindset to give...Unfortunately he isn't.

And I still maintained, the money is not there..

Lastly, parents should find a way to teach their children how to be responsible from that tender age..
For example, there are little little things you could pay outsiders to do for you, You simply let them do it amd and you pay them..Then ask your wife to monitor how they spend their earnings.

Parenting is a serious job..How you train them is how they will grow.

Growing up, I and my siblings were taught to hustle from teenage..We revolt when my parents try to get labourers do some jobs..We rather do it with our friends collect the money and share.

By the time we became adults, there are quite a handful of things we can do in addition to education..Now, my parents are relaxed knowing they have done their parenting to best of their ability...

If you don't your kids training well, you will grow old to keep struggling when you are meant to relax no matter how small.

There is no way you can force a 29year old man to do anything aside sitting him down to have a man to man discussions.

When you said that the money is not there, I just kind of wonder how much should be available before someone can decide to take responsibility...

If his father is not leaving with him,
<<< Won't he pay rent... Won't he eat or will he go to the shop owner and tell them to give him their products but that the money is not there that they should bear with him?

<<< If he stays on his own, electricity bill will be paid with the money that is not there right?

<<< I will not blame the man for anything because even if he instilled good values on his kids... Some will still turned out to be what they wanted to be... Some turned out to be selfish, some liberal minded...I wished that he should go with tough love on him....

Tina001:


If not for anything, at least respect his age. See the way u talking to a 60years old man. Must you display your lack of home training I blame social media

LilMissFavvy:
He is selfish*. So you have to be locking up some of the foodstuffs and other items in a place he cannot reach. You can take the fridge to your room permanently. I think you should be happy to have your son living with you. Don't send him away. When you begin to lock things up, he will start buying items for the house.

Beremx:
The current situation of the country made him to still be living under your roof. Don’t frustrate him and make him misbehave. He’s still a good boy unlike some sons who are jobless and shameless. Give him more time to look for a better job and let him move on

shawante:


If I have the means I'll do that with all joy.. Afterall the joy of every parent is to see that their children are comfortable

Golan007:


After graduation, a man should leave his father's house.

Mooh247:




See wetin bad economy cause

You can't repay your father for raising you, you are still taking from him even at retirement

That's a crime


Use the method my mum used on us..

Note ; she is a retired Federal Government worker with my dad and they both earn good money from pension and house rent

Call all your children to have a serious conversation early in the morning...

Mandate each and everyone of them to take care of a certain bill or give you a certain amount every month so as to receive your true blessing while you're still alive

Start with little commitments for them

*filling of cooking gas
*service and fueling of Generators
*buying of pure water and water dispenser refill
*even your kid in school can afford to buy bread or live chcken every time he comes home if you mandate him to do so
*3k monthly subscription of internet or DSTV




.

JONNYSPUTE:

I don't even know what to say but to start with. How was he raised?
I mean,was he having everything at his will when growing up?

MajorOvakporaye:


SHUT UP!!! SOLMUSDESIGN, YOUR DUMB PRESIDENT AND THE IRAGBIJI BULLION VAN CRIMINAL ARE BIG CONTRIBUTORS TO THIS FAILED ECONOMY

Desusi:
Naira landers, kindly advise me on what to do.

l am over 60 years old, a widower. By the grace of God, l was blessed with three children of which two are graduates with good grades from reputable universities here in Nigeria, one is still undergraduate before the departure of my late wife some years back.

As a retired man with meager money, I decided to manage a little business which barely gives me much money. One of these my children, a professional, though not teacher, is currently residing with me doing teaching job in different places as part time, pending when he would get a much better job.

We are living in my personal house. l would single handedly pay electricity bills, lawnman, etc. My son would not want to help in any way, not even with pure water of #10 claiming that he is with his father.

Efforts to convince him to assist me is not yielding positive result, instead he would pick quarrels with me. His senior sister has married, while the junior brother is still in the school as dependant, what sort of counseling do you think he needs to change.

I am afraid even if this boy owns shop rite in future, he would not help either.

Desusi:
Naira landers, kindly advise me on what to do.

l am over 60 years old, a widower. By the grace of God, l was blessed with three children of which two are graduates with good grades from reputable universities here in Nigeria, one is still undergraduate before the departure of my late wife some years back.

As a retired man with meager money, I decided to manage a little business which barely gives me much money. One of these my children, a professional, though not teacher, is currently residing with me doing teaching job in different places as part time, pending when he would get a much better job.

We are living in my personal house. l would single handedly pay electricity bills, lawnman, etc. My son would not want to help in any way, not even with pure water of #10 claiming that he is with his father.

Efforts to convince him to assist me is not yielding positive result, instead he would pick quarrels with me. His senior sister has married, while the junior brother is still in the school as dependant, what sort of counseling do you think he needs to change.

I am afraid even if this boy owns shop rite in future, he would not help either.

sgtponzihater1:
Ask him to leave your house in 3-6months. At least you know you are taking care of yourself and your dependent.

Desusi:
Naira landers, kindly advise me on what to do.

l am over 60 years old, a widower. By the grace of God, l was blessed with three children of which two are graduates with good grades from reputable universities here in Nigeria, one is still undergraduate before the departure of my late wife some years back.

As a retired man with meager money, I decided to manage a little business which barely gives me much money. One of these my children, a professional, though not teacher, is currently residing with me doing teaching job in different places as part time, pending when he would get a much better job.

We are living in my personal house. l would single handedly pay electricity bills, lawnman, etc. My son would not want to help in any way, not even with pure water of #10 claiming that he is with his father.

Efforts to convince him to assist me is not yielding positive result, instead he would pick quarrels with me. His senior sister has married, while the junior brother is still in the school as dependant, what sort of counseling do you think he needs to change.

I am afraid even if this boy owns shop rite in future, he would not help either.

Desusi:
Naira landers, kindly advise me on what to do.

l am over 60 years old, a widower. By the grace of God, l was blessed with three children of which two are graduates with good grades from reputable universities here in Nigeria, one is still undergraduate before the departure of my late wife some years back.

As a retired man with meager money, I decided to manage a little business which barely gives me much money. One of these my children, a professional, though not teacher, is currently residing with me doing teaching job in different places as part time, pending when he would get a much better job.

We are living in my personal house. l would single handedly pay electricity bills, lawnman, etc. My son would not want to help in any way, not even with pure water of #10 claiming that he is with his father.

Efforts to convince him to assist me is not yielding positive result, instead he would pick quarrels with me. His senior sister has married, while the junior brother is still in the school as dependant, what sort of counseling do you think he needs to change.

I am afraid even if this boy owns shop rite in future, he would not help either.