Optimistic4life:


So the thought of sex coming through my mind has already made me a sinner?

For your sanity, do not listen to whatever Kobojunkie tells you. Some persons just have a bizarre way of interpreting the bible to make you and everyone else feel bad about themselves, by postulating impossible/impractical things. The fact that you crave 'touch' simply means you are a human with a functional body; God created you that way and it is not a sin to be human.

What the bible says about lusting in your heart is largely misconstrued and twisted by fear mongering preachers who make you feel heaven is impossible. The desire for sex is not a sin, especially if you on your own accord, restrained yourself from indulging. It can only be counted as a sin if after thinking about it, you actually intended to go ahead but probably couldn't fulfil the desires because of external factors (e.g. like lack of access to the other sexual partner etc.); in this case, it is counted against you that you've already committed the act in your mind. But if on your own accord you declined to give in to the urges/temptation, then it is no sin.

I wish you the very best in your decision to be chaste. Since you do it for God, His grace would help you achieve your desires.

Sltp:
Keep punishing yourself because you don't want to sin. One day, you will go crazy from deliberately withholding your body from what it needs to function properly.

There is no such word as sin. It's a word created by humans to mentally enslave other humans.

I wonder o.
How can God create an act and doing the act is also a sin?
Who do Nigerians this thing no try at all.
The mental colonization no be here.
It's so bad that most Nigerian women don't cum or squirt because they have sex like they're in bondage, no freedom whatsoever.
Tueh.

Why did you leave your husband? Are you creating a better future for your child?
Stop complaining since you told the world that you can live without man.
Man up!

Bigredmachine:
OP get married again... As e dey hot... If you marry again God no go vex...

She is not divorced yet so she cannot have sex now. I will suggest she go back to her man and settle the differences to come togey again

SugarGirl44:
Have you been eating since your separation?
Have you been sleeping?
Have you been urinating?
All these are part of being a living thing just like having sex, sex is not a sin and God didn't send you message.
Just do it responsibly, like a human, not having it with any and everybody like an animal, and you're just fine dear.
Stop adding more pressure to your life.
Say yes to one of your numerous admirers and be satisfied, life is for the living.
I'm sure your ex is having the time of his life wherever he is while you're disturbing yourself unnecessarily.
Dunno why women like putting pressure on themselves.
I'm in a similar situation and trust me I no dey carry last, I'm even more sexually satisfied than when I was with my ex.

Op pls avoid this counsel, it is satanic

If the differences between you and your husband are irreconcilable, try fasting (Islamic point of view) and get busy (my personal remedy)

Bro, what the lady need right now is the solution to her challenges and not your condemnation.

Kobojunkie:
If God is really who you claim to want to please by your choice, then you want to make sure you have the right information to help you on your path. According to Jesus Christ, the one who is God's New Covenant and Law in the Kingdom of God, what is sin is not what you refer to as sexual immorality- fornication, masturbation, homosexuality etc. - instead sin is the lust in your heart towards another - Matthew 5 vs 27 - 28 - those fantasies and longings for sex are what constitute sin in the Kingdom of God.

So while you claim you have not physically engaged in what is sexually immoral activities in the 18 months period, that all means nothing when you consider that the sin is that committed in your mind/heart and not the physical activity itself.

So madam OP you are already on your way to hell according to this scripture, sorry God doesn't seem to understand your pain his only preoccupation according to this shortsighted poster, is to throw you into hell for even considering sin. Hahahaha. Very dumb people everywhere nowadays. Instead of asking yourself why are the hormones raging? Who put them there, you? You want to pls the creator by abstaining from sex that you didn't force yourself to crave? The same creator put the cravings there but you want to pls that creator by suffering to subdue it? Anyway you will eventually get sense

Kobojunkie:
If God is really who you claim to want to please by your choice, then you want to make sure you have the right information to help you on your path. According to Jesus Christ, the one who is God's New Covenant and Law in the Kingdom of God, what is sin is not what you refer to as sexual immorality- fornication, masturbation, homosexuality etc. - instead sin is the lust in your heart towards another - Matthew 5 vs 27 - 28 - those fantasies and longings for sex are what constitute sin in the Kingdom of God.

So while you claim you have not physically engaged in what is sexually immoral activities in the 18 months period, that all means nothing when you consider that the sin is that committed in your mind/heart and not the physical activity itself.

I understand the angle you're coming from but it's impossible to live without impure thought. She has been in it for quite some time and her body has been conditioned to those things. She need a therapist. She's trying to be careful. Bad habits are so easy to start but later on, it becomes so difficult if not impossible to stop. At this point I'll say the situation is delicate. My advice to you is to allow yourself to be loved, get acquainted with people. Always , always pray about it. God loves you so much and He knows you personally, I'm sure a good man is on his way. Don't give up please, just hold on a little bit.

My dear beloved sister, you are doing well... My honest advice for you is that you should marry your GOD, simple!

Have sex.

But...

Stay away from work colleagues, church members and your neighbourhood.

Sex is a need for a mature body. Do not suppress it. Suppressing it can disturb your psychological state.

There was a time I indulged, and felt guilty. Then I stopped. In retrospect, I realize I wasn't ready. I suggest you prepare yourself psychologically for it.

Go for it.

godliman:

Op pls avoid this counsel, it is satanic

Satanic kee you there.
Holier than thou mofo.

There's a point where the urge might come, but it won't remain to the point where it becomes a distraction. If it's becoming a distraction, then it means you are feeding it or you're being fed by something... That's called lust.

See...Jas 1:14 KJV But every man is tempted, when he is drawn away of his own lust, and enticed.
Jas 1:14 EasyEnglish It is our own thoughts that tempt us sometimes. And then we want to do wrong things. We want what is bad. And that causes us to do wrong things.

When you feed your thoughts right, you won't bear the fruit of sin. It's called GIGO (Garbage in, garbage out).
So these are my questions?

Are you genuinely bornagain? Do you love Jesus? If Yes, then how is your prayer life? Not prayer time o, but prayer life? Do you study the word of God for your life? Do you seek to improve daily and have a closer walk with Jesus? Is your study genuine and meaningful that brings you to brokenness before God daily? Do you have godly friends and ministers whom you report to? Are you a disciple?

Plenty questions right... . But those are the realities in the fight to stay pure. Our generation is immorality filled and you must be ready for a fight to stay pure. If you are spending too much time on social media, movies or things to pass time which doesn't enhance your walk with God, please reduce that time. Also, is there a man or guy you are lusting after by reason of you people being close? Please stay away. And please, if you need to finalize your divorce quickly, maybe you do even if i don't subscribe to divorce. I'm sure you have your reasons.

Optimistic4life:
I'm trying hard to live a life free from sin and sexual immorality and I am doing pretty well but of recent, my hormones/body have been raging and I am finding it difficult to cope.

It's 18months I have been separated and there is no getting back together.

Were you ever in my situation, how did you overcome without involving in sex/masturbation?

I just need some words of encouragement.

Its really not easy and it has become some sort of distraction.

The reason I do not want to have a male friend is because of my fear for God.

am willing to solve your problem.come marry me cos am still single.

Kobojunkie:
He gave man dominion over everything, even those hormones.

Like He gave you dominion not be hungry and stay for months without food

Have ever been hungry but younarebwatchimgba movie that is interesting do you realise that the movie has the capacity to ataje away your attention from the hunger. Keep your mind on other things then you would Find it difficult to think about sex. Thank you

eno easi for woman..man na another thing

Follow peace with all men and holiness... Heb 22:14 go and make peace with your husband.

Forget ungodly advice and counselings from ungodly people. The grass always looks greener in the other side of the fence but it's all mirage

Optimistic4life:



Definitely but divorce isn't finalized.

Johnboom:
God hates divorce. Go back to your formal marriage, be humble, pray that God should touch your husband and that He should make your marriage work.

I don't think going back is the job (even though she should be willing to) of the woman but that of man.

I'm sure Jesus mentioned that whoever divorced his wife (for reasons which the woman didn't cause) made her an adulterer. Just exactly like the case of the OP.

Kobojunkie:
And like every other sin(except the one), God forgives even the sin of divorce.

Just keep quiet and stop misquoting scriptures up and down.

Pls I have a question..why avoid sex?what is wrong with having sex?

AGAIN, MY ADVICE TO YOU IS THAT YOU SHOLUD DO WELL TO MARRY YOUR GOD!

And them go say the gender no like sex.. Abeg e.
Op buy tools .. Person here say you fit use hawk beak that day,if to buy tools na sin too..

Optimistic4life:
I'm trying hard to live a life free from sin and sexual immorality and I am doing pretty well but of recent, my hormones/body have been raging and I am finding it difficult to cope.

It's 18months I have been separated and there is no getting back together.

Were you ever in my situation, how did you overcome without involving in sex/masturbation?

I just need some words of encouragement.

Its really not easy and it has become some sort of distraction.

The reason I do not want to have a male friend is because of my fear for God.

To start with,I sincerely commend your efforts so far. Sincerely speaking,it's not easy to hold it down for good eighteen months ! It can only be done by a God fearing person who is very determined to come clean before her creator.

Having said that,I must tell you however that the only solution there is to your situation is to remarry if there is no way of reconciling with your Ex husband. You will eventually give in to the hormonal pressure if you do not take a step to either remarry or reconcile with your Ex. I think you need to consider remarriage since you said there is no way of getting back together with your Ex husband. As you may know,you can't get sexually involved with any other man except you're married to such man;God frowns seriously against fornication and adultery.

You need the holy spirit now more than ever to be able to overcome the pressure. You therefore,need constant prayer,fasting and reading of the holy scriptures to handle your situation.

I wish you all the very best my sister.

If you are in Deeper life church, you wouldn't have these unholy feelings because you would be taught on how to mortify the flesh through sanctification and holiness.

By the way, you wouldn't have contemplated separation or divorce in the first place.

Definitely but divorce isn't finalized.

Divorce isn't a plan.
If God is truly who you want to please.
Have you forgotten where it reads in your Bible that God is against divorce?
Don't commit a bigger sin cause you are running away from a small one.
Here is my advice,
It's either you remain as you are( which is difficult for a natural human)
Or you see how to return to your husband.

What will young widow say? Who have spent 20 years without sex.

I think this sex thing have affected many younger generations now and has led to many homes destroyed because they engaged in it at a very young age and with several people.

Back to the issue, if widows can abstain completely from sex, you can do this too.

Optimistic4life:


This option is definitely not in the picture at all.

He said I am free to remarry if I want but we aren't divorced and also remarrying isn't a day's affair nor a joke.

Why don't you meet him and ask him to do you without any strings attached since you guys aren't divorced totally?

quote author=VEHINTOLAR post=111349315]

To start with,I sincerely commend your efforts so far. Sincerely speaking,it's not easy to hold it down for good eighteen months ! It can only be done by a God fearing person who is very determined to come clean before her creator.

Having said that,I must tell you however that the only solution there is to your situation is to remarry if there is no way of reconciling with your Ex husband. You will eventually give in to the hormonal pressure if you do not take a step to either remarry or reconcile with your Ex. I think you need to consider remarriage since you said there is no way of getting back together with your Ex husband. As you may know,you can't get sexually involved with any other man except you're married to such man;God frowns seriously against fornication and adultery.

You need the holy spirit now more than ever to be able to overcome the pressure. You therefore,need constant prayer,fasting and reading of the holy scriptures to handle your situation.

I wish you all the very best my sister.

What does your Bible say about divorce,and remarriage]