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Her First Child Belongs To My Friend! Should I Tell Her Husband? - Romance (12) - Nairaland

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Any Lady That Belongs To Any Of These Groups Should Consider Polygamy (opinion) / I Have Been Sleeping With My Husband's Brother, My First Child Belongs To Him / The Baby I Am Carrying Belongs To My Ex-Boyfriend - Lady To Boyfriend (2) (3) (4)

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Re: Her First Child Belongs To My Friend! Should I Tell Her Husband? by Kylce042(m): 6:11am On Aug 14, 2022
Regardless:
Hey guys,
Pardon the long post.
So when I was still in 200 level staying in school hostel, I had this pre-degree roommate - handsome bad guy. He met a lady at the center he was attending tutorials for Jamb and PD exam. The lady and her mum were living in the town where our school was. They started having sex like mad. They so much had sex to stupor that one day this my guy came back completely drained. We had to arrange Malt and Milk for him to get himself that day. Now this girl was involved with another guy who was already working in all this Oil drilling company and he was alright.

I came back from lectures one day and my former roomie was alone in the room and moody. I asked him what was wrong and he opened up to me that the girl is pregnant and they have tried to abort the baby to no avail. Ha... So wetin wan play like this? He said the girl and her mum had already planned to pin the pregnancy on the working guy's head as this my guy no get shishi plus he couldn't even tell the girl to keep it for him or go and stay with his people because he had stayed at home for like 5 years committing plenty atrocities before his mum managed to send him to school for PD. He was sad because he didn't want another man to take care of his child.

When I asked him about the situation after some time, he said the working guy had already accepted the pregnancy and had already started buying baby things down. lol... The guy didn't gain admission again and went back home. Later he came back and did Diploma... When I asked him of the child, he said the child was a carbon copy of him, that the girl had done intro with the guy but when he has money he would come back for the child..

Last month, I received a friend request from my fomer roomie on FB. Long story cut short, after 7 years, he has blown through yahoo in SA. I asked him about the child and he said he can't trace the baby mama again, her mum had relocated from that town and he has exhausted all means looking for them. I jokingly offered my help and the guy was willing to give me money to help him trace her. I told him I would see what I can do.

It took me a while but I was able to trace the girl on SM and even traced the now husband to LinkedIn. Babe is living well with Oil money and has 3 kids and truly the first girl is my guy's carbon copy.. Damn... I started feeling for the child. Beautiful soft girl-child.

I decided ring the girl and immediately I told her what was happening, she hung up and blocked my number.. lol.. I sent a msg to her with my second line and told her to better call me back before I send a message to her husband... babe called me and was begging.. that my former roomie is not responsible. he was not trying then... she couldn't wait .. blah blah .. that please I should not scatter her marriage... was really crying over the phone... The RP in me wasn't buying it until she mentioned that I should please think about how this would shatter her daughter's life. Omoh the human in me made me pause come begin reason am...

My former roomie's lifestyle isn't really what a child would be proud of.. the guy has done everything from cultism to robbery and still hasn't changed and now to yahoo.......only thing he has now to offer that child is money....He said his mother has been telling him to go and bring the child from another man's house.
I don't care about the babe because ladies always think their hoe-phase would go unrewarded..
I pity for the babe's husband coz he was simp then and has remained so till now oblivious of anything.....
I only sincerely care about the 7y/o child whose life would be turned upside down by this shocking revelation..

Anyway, I told her that I wouldn't do anything for now but my guy is very desperate and she better handles it fast and that it's only a mater of time my guy gets to her one way or another... Babe thanked me and hung up. Next day, she wiped her and her husband's SM clean and deleted the accounts.. except the man's LinkedIn of course.. The man don sha accept me as one of his connections.... I've not revealed any findings to my former roomie.. Last time he asked when I want to start tracking her, I just stalled him. I'm sitting on the sidelines for now.. Omoh I weak sad ..... The good, bad and ugly comments are welcomed.


You’re a jobless foolish man don’t go and join your friend in SA n make your own yahoo money stay there n be looking for marriage to destroy as for the other coward in SA if he couldn’t man up as a broke guy and stand for his child that child is no longer his child and should know there will be consequences for going for the child and possibly destroying somebody’s home

2 Likes

Re: Her First Child Belongs To My Friend! Should I Tell Her Husband? by Kamxy: 6:30am On Aug 14, 2022
Firstly, the guy tried aborting the baby....and it didn't work meaning....he did not want the baby initially. Allow the little girl have a fulfilled life and use yours to do something else than doing investigation wey dem no send u...
I don't think the yahoo guy has claim to a child he wanted to get rid of .....please allow humanity here and leave the child be

1 Like

Re: Her First Child Belongs To My Friend! Should I Tell Her Husband? by Paulianfa(m): 6:36am On Aug 14, 2022
No comment

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Re: Her First Child Belongs To My Friend! Should I Tell Her Husband? by eazzzy1(m): 7:12am On Aug 14, 2022
How can you say you are protecting the girl? 13 years from now, she’s dating someone, having sex maybe get pregnant then discovers she’s been dating her brother or cousin or worse her father.

We saw the news of how one nollywood actor was fighting for custody of his step daughter, who says that won’t be the same in this case? You are doing a disservice to the little girl and the two men involved in this case.

Of the four party involved only one person benefits from the continuous lies and that is the woman.

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Re: Her First Child Belongs To My Friend! Should I Tell Her Husband? by marlow1962(m): 7:26am On Aug 14, 2022
bepositive11:


Will that girl be proud to call an armed robber and yahoo boy her father?? He should take care of himself legally first before trying to take care of a child.
I pray another man will be the father of all your child.
With that, i believe you will test how it feels to be useless and fatherless to your own (YOUR OWN) child.
Re: Her First Child Belongs To My Friend! Should I Tell Her Husband? by TMTR: 7:26am On Aug 14, 2022
Sotland:



A child who has grown to know you as father and indeed calls you father, becomes your child automatically. Whether you are the biological father or not.

Do you think you can go about and impregnate someone's daughter without marrying her and later you come back to claim a child you never played a father figure part in her life?

For even impregnating a girl out of marriage, it's a crime..

You reasoning is archaic,backward and very unenlightened.

At the bolded, that's laughable, are you living under a rock , look around you,no one is ever going to jail for impregnating a girl out of wedlock, it happens everyday and it will continue to happen,in fact some girls even desire it.

And from your comment, I guess you wouldn't mind being a paternity fraud victim well not everyone is like you,look there is a difference between going to adopt a child knowing the child is not yours and being deceived by a woman that her child is choice and any woman that does this should be ready to face the consequences undecided

And as long as the child is yours, you have a right to your child whether you married the mother or not, stop reasoning like a village palm wine tapper sad

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Re: Her First Child Belongs To My Friend! Should I Tell Her Husband? by advanceDNA: 7:31am On Aug 14, 2022
bepositive11:


The real father is an armed robber, a yahoo boy. What kind of influence will he have on that girl? He deserves access to his child, but he should first establish himself financially in legal ways.

Do you think she'll be proud to call him dad right now? Being a father takes more than sperm.

Go and tell politicians they dont deserve their kids....ask politians' kids of they are proud of their fathers and mothers..?? your point of view is flawed...
.you dont dialogue based on realities....always fallacies.....so you think he's incapable of being a father....life is not balck and white...

You are like all these people on nairaland that judge people by moniker...by looks and what not....even bokoharam have children and care for them....who told you the current father is not stealing in the office ....?? We all sin differently....

Thank God say you no be God...u are always thinking you know what people deserve.....the same ideology u gave laat time i had a chat with you..

1 Like

Re: Her First Child Belongs To My Friend! Should I Tell Her Husband? by cedricksly: 7:33am On Aug 14, 2022
Blackdeewhy:
That girl deserves happy life and opportunity to grow with her other siblings.
Let the truth reveal it's self.
If you pursue this, the woman in question may organized for your dismissed. And from your analysis she can afford that.
leave that child alone and let God be the judge.
My one cent
I not surprised this is coming from a lady, madam u literally telling him to lie to his friend and suppress the truth, where is your moral?

Inasmuch As you feel for the little girl, she deserve the right to know the truth at an early age to accept it over the years, not when she is way older, ans the man deserve the truth also to come in agreement that he has been raising someone else's daughter.. Is it when he is old that he will be told and that will break him... You gaining this kind of useless advice go and watch Episodes of Paternity Court(YouTube) and you will think more better and more Rationally if you see certain cases, only then you will know delay and more delay makes the revelation more dreadful and disasterous

1 Like

Re: Her First Child Belongs To My Friend! Should I Tell Her Husband? by Russi: 7:41am On Aug 14, 2022
[/size]Let's be very honest here. POINTS.
Hmmm, a Yahoo and badguy that cannot locate an intimate partner who he knows the family to their roots sounds like nollywood only. However we analyse,...

1) A child you tried very very hard to KILL (abort) because of your selfishness.

2) A child you didn't offer support to the mother when she was pregnant.

3) A child you didn't support at labour or birth.

4) A child you didn't pat foe pampers, milk, baby food, formula or even golden morn.

5) A child you never supported to nursery and primary school.

6) A child of convenience (only remembered bc you think money is everything)

Guy, continue to watch from afar. You can send money for upkeep bc that's what you're good for.

Many guys in nairaland will feel pity for the Yahoo irresponsible fellow bc they identify with him.. So If you identify with him consciously or unconsciously realise that there's something wrong with you.


7) Yes the girl claimed the child MAY be yours, but it's only her imagination for now.

I really hope they get in touch someday. They can jointly decide on what to do. But it doesn't have to be you in-between.

On the other hand TRUTH IS BITTER BUT NECESSARY!

The adults ALL deserve to know the truth. How they handle it is another discussion. The Oil guy will likely protect his wife's daughter bc by now he's really fond of her and lives her innocently.

This is best handled by A PROFESSIONAL MEDIATOR. He will speak separately with the Yahoo guy and the mother. Then they will meet to agree on some helpful plan. Then the mediator will break the news to the husband in an expertly manner, maybe over weeks drip...drip...drip!

There will then be uncertainty. The husband will consult Wise family and friends and maybe religious leaders.

These advisors will generally suggest he be wise, careful and sensitive. A few will day he kick the mother out immediately.

He will likely not kick her out bc of the other children but the relationship will never be the same and it is perfectly okay if it doesn't return to as usual bc it was built on lies anyway.

The next step is for the man to have the others kids DNA tested. The professional colleagues will insist on this because he cannot rely on ger words any more. Even if they are splitting images if him, he'll be suspicious until he gets scientific confirmation. He will no longer trust his emotions.

Note that he MIGHT already have known she was "wayward" (but just because she had a bf doesn't conclude she way wayward)...

[size=11pt]T

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Re: Her First Child Belongs To My Friend! Should I Tell Her Husband? by nokspos: 7:52am On Aug 14, 2022
Homeboiy:
Use this thing cash out

If your guy offer better money
Spill it to him

If the woman offer better money
Lock up the matter.

Lol I swear I would do the same
Re: Her First Child Belongs To My Friend! Should I Tell Her Husband? by Sotland: 8:03am On Aug 14, 2022
TMTR:



And as long as the child is yours, you have a right to your child whether you married the mother or not, stop reasoning like a village palm wine tapper sad[/color]


Who gives you such right over the child? You must be a joke.. Perhaps you kept trying such nonsense with a poor family that doesn't know their stand.. Come try such with family who knows their stand and you will wish you were never born..

This is how irresponsible guys goes about making irresponsible families. A lot of abortions, unwanted child and increasing the ratio of baby mamas.

I repeat try such with a family that knows their stand and you will wish you were never born.

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Re: Her First Child Belongs To My Friend! Should I Tell Her Husband? by Ephiks(m): 8:29am On Aug 14, 2022
O so simi lenu, o bu iyo si
Re: Her First Child Belongs To My Friend! Should I Tell Her Husband? by true2god: 8:51am On Aug 14, 2022
advanceDNA:


Don't mind those boys....a woman will never do something like get pregnant for someone and give it to another man....lies every where.. just to make women look bad
You are a fool. In 2011 a girl almost pinned a pregnancy on ME but I was too smart for her. She confessed, after one week of questioning and calculation that her boyfriend in Asaba got her pregnant before she came staying with me in Lagos.

Over 90% of Nigerian girls are evil and don't love. They will always go for a more financially stable guy even if he a criminal.
Re: Her First Child Belongs To My Friend! Should I Tell Her Husband? by advanceDNA: 8:53am On Aug 14, 2022
true2god:
You are a fool. In 2011 a girl almost pinned a pregnancy on ME but I was too smart for her. She confessed, after one week of questioning and calculation that her boyfriend in Asaba got her pregnant before she came staying with me in Lagos.

Over 90% of Nigerian girls are evil and don't love. They will always go for a more financially stable guy even if he a criminal.


U are the iďíót here... ordinary sarcasm u cannot identify becos u cant read between the lines....na people like u woman dey easily deceive
Re: Her First Child Belongs To My Friend! Should I Tell Her Husband? by Class01: 8:57am On Aug 14, 2022
Don't fool your self. From the moment you called to threaten her, she is already working on (plan B) how to sustain her life outside that marriage not everyone is dump. If you push her to the wall, she may just own up and tell her husband about it her self.
Have you asked your self what kind of a child a hardened criminal will probably raise? If he was responsible, the girl wouldn't have opted for that option or you think the girl happily did that?

And as for you once she leaves that home because of you, what do you think she will do? Or you think she will just fold her hands and clap for you? Or you are underestimating her thinking she can't do nothing??

Make we de mind our business abeg...

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Re: Her First Child Belongs To My Friend! Should I Tell Her Husband? by Onyipk: 9:13am On Aug 14, 2022
What rubbish do we read about these days? Why do you want to be the official town gossip/whistle blower?
You have a friend who seven years ago was not responsible enough to take care of his mess and now that you feel he has blown via yahoo self then you guys now feel entitled to eat your cake and have it?
What if the lady aborted/ lost the pregnancy?

Please just move on with your lives for the lady moved on years ago and is taking good care of her children.

2 Likes

Re: Her First Child Belongs To My Friend! Should I Tell Her Husband? by bepositive11: 9:49am On Aug 14, 2022
marlow1962:

I pray another man will be the father of all your child.
With that, i believe you will test how it feels to be useless and fatherless to your own (YOUR OWN) child.

Keep praying. Get out of your emotions and reason the situation with logic.

The biological father is an armed robber and a yahoo boy. The girl finding out that her father is not her biological father will mess her up. The girl's siblings finding out that their sister is a half sister will affect them. Only God knows what the husband would do to that woman if he finds out -- I'm not talking about the impact on her but how it will affect the kids. Will he k.ill her? Will he take the other 2 kids away from their mother? Will he abandon the woman and the girl? Will he stay with the woman and 2 kids but ask her to give away the daughter?

You see? The situation is very complicated. There are so many other people involved. It's extremely selfish to only see things from the perspective of "how it feels to be useless and fatherless to your own (YOUR OWN) child". Only God knows if the biological father will eventually end up in jail.

2 Likes

Re: Her First Child Belongs To My Friend! Should I Tell Her Husband? by bepositive11: 10:12am On Aug 14, 2022
It's not about what the biological father deserves. It's about the best interest of the girl. If he wants to take the place of her father, he needs to change his ways first before breaking apart that girl's life and family. What if he ends up in jail and leaves the girl behind to fend for herself?

Let's also consider these scenarios. What if she doesn't want to accept him as her father? What if she tells him that she prefers the other man as her father over him? He can't take away the years they've already spent together and the bond they've built together.

He should have insisted on taking responsibility from the very beginning when he found out that she was pregnant.

advanceDNA:


Go and tell politicians they dont deserve their kids....ask politians' kids of they are proud of their fathers and mothers..?? your point of view is flawed...
.you dont dialogue based on realities....always fallacies.....so you think he's incapable of being a father....life is not balck and white...

You are like all these people on nairaland that judge people by moniker...by looks and what not....even bokoharam have children and care for them....who told you the current father is not stealing in the office ....?? We all sin differently....

Thank God say you no be God...u are always thinking you know what people deserve.....the same ideology u gave laat time i had a chat with you..

Re: Her First Child Belongs To My Friend! Should I Tell Her Husband? by Agbebakun22: 10:21am On Aug 14, 2022
Sotland:






Loyalty to someone who is a beast? What a bad advice.. People like you get yourselves killed poking noise into others affair and destroying other people lives.

Firstly, did the so called friend paid her bride price before getting her pregnant? You think every girl is a baby maker factory? Loyalty my foot.

Every Man is a baby maker but not every man is a father. who give a Bleep about that? huh


OP. Pls don't kill the baby girl life, she deserve to grow with her sibling peacefully.. she mustn't suffer for the mistake of her mother...
Re: Her First Child Belongs To My Friend! Should I Tell Her Husband? by Agbebakun22: 10:25am On Aug 14, 2022
FuckSilly:

Or deh
May your story be like this too.
You'll be with a DIRTY loose LovePeddler whom has FUCKĒD her good youthful years away, you would marry her and she's bring home a Bastard for you to raise and your friends that will be aware would keep you in the dark until your old age ...

And if Na girl you be, Karma will definitely catch up with you with all your dirty past too.

u dey mind them since she's a woman now everyone saying minding your business

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Re: Her First Child Belongs To My Friend! Should I Tell Her Husband? by Untube: 10:26am On Aug 14, 2022
Regardless:
Hey guys,
Pardon the long post.
So when I was still in 200 level staying in school hostel, I had this pre-degree roommate - handsome bad guy. He met a lady at the center he was attending tutorials for Jamb and PD exam. The lady and her mum were living in the town where our school was. They started having sex like mad. They so much had sex to stupor that one day this my guy came back completely drained. We had to arrange Malt and Milk for him to get himself that day. Now this girl was involved with another guy who was already working in all this Oil drilling company and he was alright.

I came back from lectures one day and my former roomie was alone in the room and moody. I asked him what was wrong and he opened up to me that the girl is pregnant and they have tried to abort the baby to no avail. Ha... So wetin wan play like this? He said the girl and her mum had already planned to pin the pregnancy on the working guy's head as this my guy no get shishi plus he couldn't even tell the girl to keep it for him or go and stay with his people because he had stayed at home for like 5 years committing plenty atrocities before his mum managed to send him to school for PD. He was sad because he didn't want another man to take care of his child.

When I asked him about the situation after some time, he said the working guy had already accepted the pregnancy and had already started buying baby things down. lol... The guy didn't gain admission again and went back home. Later he came back and did Diploma... When I asked him of the child, he said the child was a carbon copy of him, that the girl had done intro with the guy but when he has money he would come back for the child..

Last month, I received a friend request from my fomer roomie on FB. Long story cut short, after 7 years, he has blown through yahoo in SA. I asked him about the child and he said he can't trace the baby mama again, her mum had relocated from that town and he has exhausted all means looking for them. I jokingly offered my help and the guy was willing to give me money to help him trace her. I told him I would see what I can do.

It took me a while but I was able to trace the girl on SM and even traced the now husband to LinkedIn. Babe is living well with Oil money and has 3 kids and truly the first girl is my guy's carbon copy.. Damn... I started feeling for the child. Beautiful soft girl-child.

I decided ring the girl and immediately I told her what was happening, she hung up and blocked my number.. lol.. I sent a msg to her with my second line and told her to better call me back before I send a message to her husband... babe called me and was begging.. that my former roomie is not responsible. he was not trying then... she couldn't wait .. blah blah .. that please I should not scatter her marriage... was really crying over the phone... The RP in me wasn't buying it until she mentioned that I should please think about how this would shatter her daughter's life. Omoh the human in me made me pause come begin reason am...

My former roomie's lifestyle isn't really what a child would be proud of.. the guy has done everything from cultism to robbery and still hasn't changed and now to yahoo.......only thing he has now to offer that child is money....He said his mother has been telling him to go and bring the child from another man's house.
I don't care about the babe because ladies always think their hoe-phase would go unrewarded..
I pity for the babe's husband coz he was simp then and has remained so till now oblivious of anything.....
I only sincerely care about the 7y/o child whose life would be turned upside down by this shocking revelation..

Anyway, I told her that I wouldn't do anything for now but my guy is very desperate and she better handles it fast and that it's only a mater of time my guy gets to her one way or another... Babe thanked me and hung up. Next day, she wiped her and her husband's SM clean and deleted the accounts.. except the man's LinkedIn of course.. The man don sha accept me as one of his connections.... I've not revealed any findings to my former roomie.. Last time he asked when I want to start tracking her, I just stalled him. I'm sitting on the sidelines for now.. Omoh I weak sad ..... The good, bad and ugly comments are welcomed.


@op, focus on your life and leave the happy family alone. God will not forgive you if you scatter dah family and that innocent girl life. What do the useless yahoo boi have to offer? The yahoo boi will ruin the little girl life. The story is real and I know about this story. @op this happens in tanke, unilorin days, boy not a girl..lol

2 Likes

Re: Her First Child Belongs To My Friend! Should I Tell Her Husband? by youngprof1999(m): 10:38am On Aug 14, 2022
Homeboiy:
Use this thing cash out

If your guy offer better money
Spill it to him

If the woman offer better money
Lock up the matter.

Naso �
Re: Her First Child Belongs To My Friend! Should I Tell Her Husband? by Agbebakun22: 10:43am On Aug 14, 2022
Op if u truly want to help ur friend just give him the husband LinkedIn handle without the wife knowing. Tho u made a mistake of calling her about the issues i'm sure by now she will be at alert either to silent u in order to keep the marriage. My advice for u now is to give the guy the husband SM handles and stay faraway. Women are heartless and evil they can do anything. Women wicked sha, i no dey pity Simple men they will learn in hard way. No be so one happened for my house last three years when this stupid woman(married woman) carry belle for thug and this thug came and told everyone that the baby is for him(among the 5 kids of this man na only this particular child no resemble the man) and the idiot husband family send the wife packing and could u believe this man go carry the woman back and still this thug of a guy stay in the house with them without the man saying anything. The man work everyday to cater for the thug and children. She's a house wife and she doesn't do anything while the thug will stay all day in their house with the woman just only the two of them while the husband and children are away. Some men are just so stupid and weak sometimes i smh for him cux he work his ass out to provide for the family + the thug inclusive.

1 Like

Re: Her First Child Belongs To My Friend! Should I Tell Her Husband? by HazzanTazzan(m): 1:25pm On Aug 14, 2022
Mrmakaveli200:
Really dicey situation. Yahoo guy, simp and a cheating ho0e. I pity the man raising someone else's child and the innocent child too. Just hold on and still observe for now

There’s no cheating Hoe in this story...

2 Likes

Re: Her First Child Belongs To My Friend! Should I Tell Her Husband? by Debest4u: 1:33pm On Aug 14, 2022
OGA the truth is that your friend never had a child 7 years ago because he has already aborted his. So he should leave the child and her family alone to enjoy their peace.

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Re: Her First Child Belongs To My Friend! Should I Tell Her Husband? by Achasew(m): 1:39pm On Aug 14, 2022
You should talk to your friend to leave the innocent child alone. You may be the biological father,but you ain’t the real father. You didn’t take responsibility when the need be and now you should move on with your life.

3 Likes

Re: Her First Child Belongs To My Friend! Should I Tell Her Husband? by Fashdeejay(m): 2:03pm On Aug 14, 2022
One question, if you were in the husband's shoes, would you want to know that the daughter you have loved from the day she was birthed is not your child

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