₦airaland Forum

first ask yourself the Q

Yesterday, we sent our office help to the supermarket for 4 bags of salt & vinegar crisps and 4 bags of plain crisps. We included a map of the shop with the crisp shelf marked and waited.

One hour later he returned with 2 large plastic bags and asked me to check if all was OK.

I opened the bags. Bag one contained 2 bottles of vinegar and 2 bags of salt. Bag 2 contained 2 large bags of frozen chips.

I was stunned at the initiative's used given such clear instructions!

Can anyone advise me on how to get such instructions right first time other than DIY?

Temivict Don't mind them let go

mash
bask
sack
mops
soup
tops
poke
pose
poet

must
tuts
bars
bats

stab
stub

Wrong number please am so sorry
but u can still say something

mist
list
last



star



bats bits

This is a bit addictive, especially if it won´t go in.

http://www.matchpractice.com/game/

u get it keep up

Earl and Bubba are quietly sitting in a boat fishing,

chewing and drinking beer when suddenly Bubba says,

'I think I'm gonna divorce my wife - she ain't spoke to

me in over 2 months.'

Earl spits, sips his beer and says, 'Better think it over,

, women like that are hard to find.'

A San Francisco man was laying in bed with his new girlfriend.

After having great sex, she spent the next hour just stroking his penis, something she seemed to love to do.

Enjoying it, he turned and asked her, 'Why do you love doing that?'

She replied, 'Because I really miss mine.'

SCRABBLE

Afternoon Scrabble - Keep it going!!!
Change one letter of the bottom word posted and let's see who gets stuck and can't continue!

Rules:
You cannot add additional letters.
You cannot use foreign languages.
You can only change one letter.

Ok, here's three to start of with.

Stow
Host
Most

nice one

The Federal Ministry of Transportation has advised that, commencing
at midnight on Friday July 18th, the Third Mainland Bridge will be
subject to partial closure so that vital repair work can be initiated.

Effectively, what this means is that INWARD traffic from Oworonsoki
to Lagos will flow between MIDNIGHT and ELEVEN AM. Road will then
be closed.

At MID-DAY the road will be opened for OUTWARD traffic from Lagos
until ELEVEN PM when road will be closed.

Traffic from EBUTE METTA to Lagos using Third Mainland Bridge is STOPPED
throughout time of repairs.

Traffic to and from Oworonsoki to EBUTE METTA will be permitted.

The road restrictions are expected to be in place until end September

Fresh from the papers this morning.
It is announced that Third Mainland Bridge will be closed for repairs for 2 month starting this Friday,
I can only begin to imagine the chaos that this will create Embarrassed Embarrassed

thanks u my guys,am right behind u guys
una do wellooooooooooooo

It's the thing that satisfies
your mind; soul; spirit; BODY
Do it in bed ; on a sofa ; in a car , or anywhere

It's called
PRAYER


GOD BLESS YOUR NAUGHT MIND

u guys are sick , instead of thank u
do u think is easy to post Bleep u deaf; dumb

What is difference between STRESS,TENSION ,PANIC

STRESS - IS when ur wife is pregnant

tension - is when ur girlfriend is pregnant

panic - is when BOTH are pregnant

if :A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
were represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26


Then: H-A-R-D-W-O-R-K=8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11===98%

K-N-O W-L-E-G-E==11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5=====96%

B-E-A-U-T-I-F-U-L=2-5-1-21-20-9-6-21-12==97%

A-T-T-I-T-U-D-E===1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5====100%
L-O-V-E-O-F-G-O-D===12+15+22+5+15+6+7+15+4===101%

Therefore one can conclude with mathematical certainty that while
HARD WORK and KNOWLEDGE will get you close and ATTITUDE will get u there ;
it's the LOVE OF GOD that will put you over .the love of GOD will take you far ,
GOD IS WORTH LOVING!

PLEASE be remained that making or
receiving call inside church is not
allowed. you will be well-advised
your phone in your car, or
keep it switched off in your bag.
Y
O
T U
H
A
N
K
JESUE CHRIST

ladies are apples on the trees. the best ones are at top of the tree,
the boys don't want to reach for the good ones
because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt
Instead, they get the rotten apples from the ground that
aren't as good , but easy.
So the apples up top think something is wrong with when
in-reality they're amazing .they just have to wait for the right boy
to come along ,the one who's-brave enough to climb to the top
GUYS MAKE UNA NO VEX

Quote Graphic Rule


[20] But the prophet, which shall presume to speak a word in my name, which I have not commanded him to speak, or that shall speak in the name of other gods, even that prophet shall die.
[21] And if thou say in thine heart, How shall we know the word which the LORD hath not spoken?
[22] When a prophet speaketh in the name of the LORD, if the thing follow not, nor come to pass, that is the thing which the LORD hath not spoken, but the prophet hath spoken it presumptuously: thou shalt not be afraid of him.




If the prophet makes a single mistake -- if the prophet predicts one thing that does not come to pass, then that prophet has not spoken with God. So, since the Bible god botched this one, we don't have to believe a word that the Bible god says, right? Well, no, it's a bit more complicated than that -- but we've at least nullified Isaiah's claim to having been a prophet of God! According to the Bible, Isaiah was a false prophet, and ought to have been put to death. Do not pay attention to what Isaiah 53 says, no matter how impressive it sounds.

Don't be fooled!

keywords: hell, child of hell, Satan, hell is real, Jesus saves from hell

People don't like to hear about hell. But I'm here to tell you that if Jesus is not your Lord and Savior, you are on your way to hell. Some of you will be upset at this bad news. You think that I'm all gloom and doom. Tell me this, if your house were on fire, would you want me to let you know? Of course you would. You'd probably thank me for telling you. Well, if you go to hell, YOU will be the one on fire.

Hell may not be a politically correct topic these days, but many people enter hell everyday. Out of the 120,000 people that die everyday, most end up in hell. Hell is a real place despite the fact that people laugh and say that they want to go there. They simply don't understand how terrible hell is. Just because you've never seen hell doesn't mean it doesn't exist. We have a searing, accurate description of what hell is like in God's word. (We'll get to some scriptures in a minute) Hell is awful and if you don't believe in Jesus, you'd better get on the stick or else that's going to be your eternal destination.

Satan, the god of this world, WILL NOT always cause havoc. His doom is already foretold, "And the devil that deceived them was cast into the lake of fire and brimstone, where the beast and the false prophet are, and shall be tormented day and night for ever and ever." (Revelation 20:10)

Did you know that if you do not belong to Jesus Christ you belong to Satan? You don't have to be a card carrying Satanist to serve Satan. You don't have to be a murderer, drunkard or drug addict, either. All you have to do is ignore Jesus Christ. If you don't have Jesus today, you are deceived and hell bound--you are a child of hell, a child of the devil.

How many times have I heard someone say, "A loving God wouldn't put His creatures in hell." Well I have news for you, friend, God doesn't put anyone in hell--their sins put them there. Know ye not that hell was not created for man? Hell was created for the devil and his angels--

Then shall he say also unto them on the left hand, Depart from me, ye cursed, into everlasting fire, PREPARED FOR THE DEVIL AND HIS ANGELS. (Matthew 25:41)

Men go to hell because they choose the devil's way and reject the Lord Jesus. God is holy and will not allow any sin in His kingdom. As a result, when people die in their sins they are forever banished from the presence of God to a place called hell--and it ain't pretty. Incidentally, Satan won't be ruling in the lake of fire. He'll be screamin' and hollerin' just like everybody else--

the devil, shall be tormented day and night

A woman and a man are involved in a car accident; it's a bad one .
Both of their car are totally demolished but amazingly neither of them is hurt
After they crawl out of their car , the woman say,''so u r a man.
That's interesting. am a woman. WOW,just look at our cars!
There's nothing left, but we're unhurt.this must be a sign from
GOD that we should meet and be friend and live together in peace for the rest of our days
Flattered the man replied '' oh yes, i agree with u completely!''
''this must be sing from God !''
the woman continued ''And look at this here's another miracle. my car
is completely demolished but this bottle of wine didn't break. Surely
God wants us to drink this wine & celebrate our good fortune.''
then she hands the bottle to the man . the man nods his head in
agreement, opens it and drinks half bottle and then hands it back to woman
the woman take the bottle and immediately put the cap back on and hands back to the man .
THE man asks, ''Aren't U having any? the WOMAN REPLIES
NO am waiting FOR POLICE, ''

bros this page na for jokes period.

All of them SCORE 2marks
the first person wrote two tyre burst

the second person wrote one front tyre burst

the third person wrote two back tyre burst


the Fourth person wrote the four tyre burst
SO THE ALL SCORE 2 MARKE

One night four MBA students were boozing till late night and
didn't study for the test which was scheduled for the next day


In the morining they thought of a plan.They made themselves
look dirty weird as they could with grease and dirt

they then when up to the Dean and said that they had
gone out to a wedding last night and on their return the tyre
f their car burst and they had to push the car all the way in no condition to appear for the test.

The Dean was a just person so he said u can have the retest after three day
On the third day they appeared before the dean . the dean said that this was a special condition test .
ALL four were requried to sit in sepearate classroom 4 the test.they all agreed as they had prepared well in the last 3 day

THE TEST CONSISTED OF 2 QUSETION WITH TOTAL OF 100 MARKS
Q1 WRITE DOWN YOUR NAME [2 MARKS]
Q2 WHICH TYRE BURST [98MARKS]

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
FOR ME i would give the car key to my old frined
& let him take the lady to hospital.,
i would stay behind & wait for the bus
with my dream partner

i mean my dream ,dream partner
opportunity comes only once

FOR ME i would give the car key to my old frined
& let him take the lady to hospital.,
i would stay behind & wait for the bus
with the partner of my dream

HMMMMMMMMMM [quote][/quote][tr][/tr]