₦airaland Forum

she is taken, she doesnt know it yet!

na2day doesn't scare me though

Says who?

Do you work out?

yeah- 6 days a week.

How?I'm as harmless as they come. . .i mean come.

Generalization is not harmless to me.

In between, you aren't a bad looking girl yourself.Are you taken?

No and I am not looking---and besides you scare me.

Dude, get real! Everybody "generalizes" based on perception and experience e.g

(1)Nigerians are more suspect than other nationalities when it comes to fraud/drug smuggling?TRUE OR FALSE?
True- does not mean ALL naijas are fraudsters

(2)Arabs (and moslems in general) are more suspect than other religious sects due to their extremism?TRUE OR FALSE?
True- does not mean all [/b]moslems are terrorists
(3)People assess permanently in the first 2 seconds they lay their eyes on you.TRUE OR FALSE?
Sometimes, but thier perception of you might chane after 2 minutes of getting to know someboy

(4)Even the bible generalizes. . .you have the jews and the "gentiles".Who were more barbaric?The Gentiles who worshipped the dieties they know and mind their own business or the Jews who slaughtered entire cities like goats because they wanted more land?Are we trying to say there were no good people among the gentiles?Isn't that "generalization"?

Generalization leads to wrongly  sterotyping a whole race/gender etc and it is [b]WRONG
Whites believed that black people as a whole were animals with no feelings that's why whole lot of our forefathers were shipped all over the world like so much cattle and forced to work on plantations from dawn till dusk. Generalization is dangerous and wrong.

NL men (and men all over the world) judge women based on both their experiences and that of others and after more than a few examples, YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO GENERALIZE!

So, are you saying your mom and sisters and female family members are like this? After a few examples you have the right to generalize?? very funny. My friend, you have no right to generalize. No two women were raised alike, we all have our different upbringing which usually shape how we behave later in life.

UNLESS U ARE PROVEN WRONG nd in dis case generalisation doesnt make sense nt al women are d blood sucking type dat wait til u are on bar nd nt al nl men generalise write carefully

Waleski, thanks for your very rational answer. How can someone say that all women are alike?? makes no damn sense.

I'd rather drink cyanide and die! ! !

Before a woman leaves you physically, she has already left you emotionally.Her coming back coz "things have improved" is due to the "greener pasture" syndrome in ALL WOMEN.If thing's get rough again or she meets a "bigger fish", she will repeat the same crap.If she does it once, she will do it twice and thrice and a zillion times over.

Women Angry

Harikiri- Why am i not surprised at your generalization. Since you hate women so much, go marry a man nao. Not all women are have "greener pastures syndrome", your post has just seriously upset me. Why must you NL men think so poorly of women??

I would stick with him, although I will have a reasonable time limit. I'm not a dream killer. If a brotha is seriously trying, I'd work with him. If we're in a relationship we're in it together and I expect him to support my dreams and vice versa. As for taking him/her back after 'making it', I don't think I would because he/she should have been there when the going was tough, not wait until the going is good and now want to share in the rewards. Because what happens when all of a sudden the riches disappear again, they'll hit the road again and traumatize the child once again. That's what's wrong with a lot of society today, instant gratification. Everyone wants everything fast and easy and don't want to work for things. Smiley The want the guy or girl who already drives the mercedes not the ones who are taking the bus or driving a hoopty who will someday drive the mercedes.

on point- thanks for your contribution

hmm I watched that movie too.

Well your question is tough cos some men are just dreamers and have no plans of realizing their dreams and love can't feed anyone. As long as a man has big ambitions and a plan to follow through with it, then I will stand by him, but a "joseph the dreamer" type can stay far away.

If I were the guy in pursuit of happiness, no i will not take her back since she did not believe in my dreams.

Why na? una make me look like I dey flaky Sad Sad

Well cos you have been using your cousins marriage as an excuse so i know you are ready to flake on us.

Im plannin to come

neva been to the states and need a good holiday anywayz

not to mention i should buy some clothes for my place

soo count me in

ill let unno if anything changes

in fact u shuld open a thread for it in the meet up zone

I will do so tomorrow

lolz

onli u abeke

onli u!!

with that hard bodi u can even drink palm oil by the keg!!

the food is heart disease and diabetes on a plate!

me too i sabi cook everything

can even physically pound yam!!

but i will avoid it oo- special occasions onli

i no wan die!

Ehen ore mi to dun. You are just talking, as booriful as you are, i thot you won't be able to cook. Amala is the only swallow i eat, I don't do eba or pounded yam, cos itstoo heavy. I  can cook iyan and eba too, but i no fit chop am, wanna be sexy for a good long while

Ayetty, you must come for that reunion ooh, don't dissapoint me abeg. Ebony is being very shady about it, i don't think she is coming.

ebony i addded you on yim since, you no even accept. Have i been relegated to adesojun's status now

abeke- the husband doesnt mind- he eats pasta- the family is the problem

hw many women do unno go out of thier way to pls thier husbands family?? how happy do they end out?

these people will only continue to push until she cracks!- she doesnt need to leaern to cook for anybody!

they have a helper! people dont come to this world to become enslaved by her husband and the family!

Ayetty- like hotstepper said, he eats pasta now does not mean he won't want to eat naija food at some point. I moved to the U.S when I was a little younger than the poster and I love my naija food wella wella and I cook all yoruba traditional food well well. I can eat all their mede mede here once in a while, but nothing replaces my amala and egusi with gbogbo eran  

I still think she should go out of her way to please her husbands family if she wants to get married to the man. They don't think much of her now, so she has try to please them. That's what i will do anyway.

So because they have a helper, she should just relax abi? If i have a housegirl when i get married she can do cleaning and washing and other stuff, but I will be cooking for my own husband. I take pride that my own bobo enjoys my own food. I'll prolly get jealous if he is complimenting the house girls cooking, but then again, I realize not everyone thinks like me. It is sad that a 30yr old can't cook sha and she seems proud of it.

I feel you ebony, I also don't do clubs anymore. Just a nice classy lounge to go drink some nice wine and cocktails. Hmmm can't wait for summer time.

I disagree with you on one point, she shouldnt bend over backwards to please his family, if she does that she might as well just convert herself into a ball so that they kick her about. If they dont like her now, there is no way they will like her when she is married and they will try their best to break the marriage.

Ayetty said she should smile hug and leave and i believe she has to do more than that. Seems like they don't think much of the poster, she has to show willingness to learn the bobo's traditional culture. Greet them like a naija woman would, she should not call her bobo's mother by her name, try and gist with her mother in law from time to time, don't talk down to them or treat them like johnny just come and she must learn how to cook. Of course there are many other things she can do to impress them, but these few things are a start. This is what i meant when I said she should go out of her way to impress them.

@luiz, We are fine ooh

if u learn to cook do it for urself and not in a bid to impress them! trust me nothing u do will eva be good enuff!

dont go out of your way to impress them, try your best to understand some people are backwards and will neva be civilised
smile hug and leave. .  . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Ayetty, you know I love you but you are wrong. She should learn to cook for herself?? For where, she wants to marry a naija man ooh. She no get choice, she must learn how to cook to please her husband, her husband's family when they visit and for their kids(when they have them).  Na everyday she wan order out to feed her husband and her kids?? a 30 year old woman that can't cook?? **shakes my head**

On the other point, she must go out of her way to impress her husbands family, na she wey wan marry the guy. If his family is not impressed with her, they will give her hell. It is in her best interest to go out of her way to impress them. Thats my own 2 cents sha.

Deor---looks like my cuz answered your question.

@ebony, you no dey go out tonite??

^^^^thats why imma want to kill the fool wey wan cheat on me. I can only beg God to give me a good hubby like Siena so I won't go to jail on murder charges.

Kenny ur mind don dey gutter tey tey.
adesojun, I don't want to reconcile with you ooh, cos I am sure if I check ur past posts again, I will just get pissed at u again.
Ebony,

Hmmm ebony is my cousin, so whether she likes it or not, na me be her agent. No man on Nl can start toasting ebony except they go thru me. Ask her, she go tell you say na true I dey talk.

This adesojun sef, everyday he is interested in a different woman, his last posting that I saw, was about his interest in marrying a white woman. Ebony is not white ooh, so he needs to go find his oyinbo pepper.

Adesojun, go and sleep jare. Geez ebony does not want you.
Better person, @hotstepper, how na? Sorry we kept missing each other on yim a couple days ago. Hope you are good though.
Ebony, my booriful sister, how na?

@poster, a Naija man will usually side with his family. If you love and want to be this man, you have to be learn how to be submissive.  I don't think you know how to do that yet, that's why his family does not like you. What tribe is he from?? When u marry a Nigerian, his family will always be involved in you life whether you like it or not.

It is a big problem that you can't cook, Berra go and learn. My own mother who is trini moved to Naija with my father from London and she learned how to cook all traditional Yoruba foods very well. I can only imagine the cultur shock she got when she got to Naija, but she persevered. From my own experience, it's a huge turn off to Naija men, when a woman can't cook. When you have kids who is gonna cook for them

You said you are childless now, but u can still have children right??

Bawomolo, me no fit argue with anybody tonite. Omo jeje Lemi. H202's answer ti te mi lo run. Maybe someone else can engage you tonite, but it ain't gonna be me.

Ok mo she gbadun ehn sin, thanks for your explanation.

H202, you and chic2pimp dey dissapoint me ooh. H202 na you especially dissapoint me, I believe you are Yoruba, paying brideprice is part of our tradition. With the way people are embracing western values, if we lose the little things that differenciates us from other countries, then I believe we have lost an inherent part of ourselves. I am definitely not a commodity, but whoever I marry must follow tradition and pay my bride price. Money does not have to be exchanged, tubers of yam, plastic bowl, palm oil and whatever else tradition dictates is enough for me.

Have some decency and self respect go get yourself JOB. Arrant nonsense hisssss

Sorry poster but you sound like a wimp, you need to man up. No woman, no matter how educated she is, has no right to walk all over her husband. How can your wife just travel and not even have the courtesy of letting you kno w where she is goin, and you just Siddon there they take am. Are you sure you are even a Nigerian man What if something happens to her while she is away and her family calls to find out where their daughter is?? you will sound like a wimp telling them you have no idea where you own wife is. Me no fit marry person like you oh, I trust my Yoruba brothers wives one is a doctor, the other one a lawyer they no get liver to try that kin rubbish.

Daduke, why u dey ask? You wan come find me?? Thanks for the compliments sha,

Na2day, if i catch u ehn, in short, I give up