₦airaland Forum

WhyAWhy: That book doesn't exist so let's be factual

And who told you so?
A man is only as enlightened as he is away of. Never say Never.

harkindele: ah luff diz topic............an i hope d peeps dat needs diz post most get to cc it

Well not when the moderators haverefused to put it on the frontpage because of their hatred for the poster.

They said same thing about 7years ago.
Even when Jimoh Ibrahim took over some years back he said the same thing.

Nigerians never stops amazing us with their "promise and fail attitude".

2sexy: true... but for now, i dont need them.

Well, you have your personal reasons for making such decision.

You are an IDI*OT!!!

A man proposing doesn't necessarily means he really wants to settle down with you.

Below is a MUST read for every lady in her 20s

https://www.nairaland.com/1086018/advice-every-lady-early-20s


Even though older girls have wasted their time on the wrong guys. You young ladies can avoid such mistake.

2sexy: brother, what I meant is that I dont feel attracted 2any of them.

Well, in as much as we talk ill about them, we can't do without them.

I KNOW YOU.
You are the kid that is always insulting me if I post an opposing view to yours. If I was your dad, I would have broken your head with bottle.

You rush here you tell us he bloodled your nose without telling us how you keep grumbling and sighing when he is talking to you.

Most of you kids of nowadays are nothing but spoilt brat.

Na horse whip the man for buy for you and even seize your passport so you can run no where.

2sexy: me wey be say every girl,no matter her beauty sef, be like man to me.

Hope say no be men you dey do oh?

HumbledbYGrace: Before I say anything I hope for ur sake that lady is not on NL

I doubt she is. So please shoot.

WhyAWhy: fast for 20years, you might not make 100bucks

FAITH - WORKS = DEAD!

Sure we all know that. But assuming you find a "secret book of life" where you founf out if you fast for a whole year you would be that rich, will you take the risk?
Let's be factual here.


Also don't forget, not everyone that works hard has money. Take a look at the scavengers, shoe cobblers, bricklayers and the rest.

HumbledbYGrace: m from the southern africa and ur welcome.I have to admit though ur one hell of a guy,and to everyone I have to confess I JUST CAN'T DO WITHOUT STYLE NETWORK but it won't be my first proriaty not now not ever but Acid u must have bored the wits out of the poor lady

Well, I won't blow my trumpet. But I am the last person to bore anyone most especially a lady.

Once a lady is smart and vast, she can never get bored around me because I love discussing diverse scenes and activities.

By the way, what do you mean by I am one hell of a guy? Hint please.

My Rule on dating is :

* Never date a lady who hasn't finalized her breakup with a guy.

* Never date a lady you don't trust.

There is something most people fail to realize, it is easier for your partners EX to get them into bed than for you to (even while you are dating them). I would have ellaborated on this but I am a little busy right now.

The very moment your girlfriend still visits her ex, then I must tell you she is most likely still slee*ping with him.

No doubt she loves you but what is love when your partner still sleeps with her ex?

I know how many of my EXs that still beg to come around but my conscience doesn't allow me permit them when I know they are in a new relationship.

3 months ago, I had an ex who was getting married the following week and she confessed that even though she is tying the knot with her hubby to be, she wished it was me. I almost fainted. Then and there I told her point blank never to call me again unless her husband is with her.

For your case, I will tell you to confront her and tell her to choose finally between you and her ex.

Please! Please!! And please!!! Font let her know you hacked into her account. You can lie someone saw her with a guy and all that.

If you confront her that it was through her facebook, she will be on the guard and you might not have another evidence to see when next she meets the guy.

Hmmm!!!

Can you people see that this Boko Haram boys are not greedy?
They are not asking for their members to be trained overseas, to receive minimum of N60,000 monthly and also to have N100billion budgeted to them 2013.

Na only in Nigeria criminsals dey comman government to come negotiate and government meets their entire conditions.

Seun, Mukina2, okija_juju shey una no go join militant or terrorist group so?

Is there any hope for the Youths in Nigeria?

It is the same people over and over again. If no be Danjuma, na Mantu, Abdulsalam, Obasanjo, babangida, Ezeife, Chukwumerije, Ekweme, Lar, Gambo and the less than 1% of Nigerians population still controlling 99% percent of our resources.

thelastPope: GEJ again setting things right in a most transparent way. You have to really give GEJ serious credit. That is why I laugh when I see some detractors trying to malign him. There is no Nigerian president that have even come close to exposing the rot in the system like he is doing. Big big credit! Even the thought of using his political opponent in the last election for such a sensitive task is unheard of. Imagine Fashola using Obanikoro to run a probe on Lagos? Not even phantomable!

You should be ashamed of yourself because it is obvious you know nothing about politics.

The whole using Nuhu Ribadu as a Flag bearer for ACN was a well mapped out plan Obansanjo used against ACN to play his joker.

Why do you think all the petitions against Ribadu were dropped and he was termed to 'resign' instead of the previous dismissal the police commision announed earlier under the Yaradua Government.

The plan was to plant Ribadu as a spy in ACN and El-Rufai in CPC. Which they both played well, but along the line El-Rufai and OBJ fell apart which tarnish the former's chances of returning to the PDP.

If CAN had in anyway won under Ribadu, you all would have seen a game twist in him turning his back on ACN and deffecting to PDP.

In the history of Nigerian politics, 2011 had the baddest game plan. But little kids won't just understand.

take dat: Should we then discredit this report based on your post? Let us know where you stand.

Its like an armed robber being the judge of pick pockets.

Oh Lord! Send down a JERRY RAWLINGS to the soil of Nigeria.

Who am I to believe?

The very same Nuhu Ribadu who claimed he had a N9billion Money laundry charges against jonathan in 2007 before president obasanjo swept the whole thing under the carpet to enable Jonathan have a clear ground to be Yaradua's running mate.

The same Nuhu Ribadu who said Tinubu looted over N23billion of Lagos state money and even called Tinubu "the biggest thief in world history" and said Tinubu needs to spend at least 20years in prison if tried in a 'competent court'.

Yet this very same Nuhu Ribadu Contested under ACN in which Tinubu is the 'all and mighty' and also took a portfolio under 'jonathan's government'.

If there's one biggest criminsal Nigeria has, it is surely this same Nuhu Ribadu.

My problem with Nigerians is that they forget History so easily and let this crooks play on their intelligence.

justicemek: Acidtalk are you male or female? if you're male I'd like to hear the rest of the story ..eemm wetin ..come ..happen? I think these things all depend on the human beings they get to meet and their choices. i've seen the worst behaved girls get married much quicker than even the very well behaved. There are married women you see abd you'll wonder what exactly made their men to go that far...sucks but its true.

Well, we weren't dating just friends so I didn't let her attitude get to me.

Find correct bottle to burst her head and then call my doctor to come and carry her away for the multiple stiches she will need.

TInubu no go gree because na him smoke pass.
And na Original, Undilluted Igbo the man dey smoke no be yauwyauw bensons and edges.

Godogwu: RUBBISH!

And you had to copy this whole write-up just to right this?


Your own don Finish.

gbosaa: I thought it was some dude named bbpreye or ppbreye who started it.
Good to know you are the garriki man who started the garrium campaign on NL.
kudos,You are one hell of a pain in seun shagarris butt.

HELL NO!

Himself and ebemma started misusing it at every silly post. I have confronted them of making a mess out of it but being an online/open forum, you can't restrict people using words and jokes.

Trust me, if they had mentained the manner I used it, Seun wouldn't have been irritated because I always used it in a mature and sarcastic way. But now, it sounds so irritating.

That's why you find me using the "story line" and "*laugh wan make me*" format now by the time people start copying, I will switch over.

Okija_juju: Nwokem, as an aspiring Comedian, my shiit is sacred.. If you must plagerise it, atleast reference me in it!!

WHAT ABOUT US STARTING A STANDUP /BLAZING MIC THREAD ON NAIRALAND??

Strictly for Comical members and with NATURAL/FRESH jokes and stories.


Let me know you take on it. Been too serious on nairaland of late and want to ease out with some crazy jokes I have in me.

Okija_juju: Nwokem, as an aspiring Comedian, my shiit is sacred.. If you must plagerise it, atleast reference me in it!!

I feel your pain.
When I started the "Gaaarri" thingy on nairaland not too long those boys hijacked it and bastardized the usage instantly I had to abandone it.

One just have to be creative always because sticking to your old jokes will make you look like the copy cat..

Had a friend in school who bought a car then by cracking 95% of my jokes. 2 months when he didn't have access to my apartment, he sold his car as he wasn't getting shows again.

chucky234: oya pass me your address,I'll come visiting with Hugo boss on.

Is like you don't want to use your legs to the village this christmas?

Come and see people's legs who I have chopped off hanging at the entrance of my door because they didn't want to pull their shoes off. I bet you don't want yours to be in my archive too.

You dare not enter my house with your shoes on. If you like put on a $3,000 mauri shoe and drive a bugatti.

If you can't pull off your shoe then I am sorry you can't enter my house.

Yomieluv: How I wish an hurricane can sweep me,and my family to Yankee. I go like am men!

Sure it can.
Only that you will arive there Stone Cold DEAD!!!
That's if ofcourse the sharks don't disect you before the Sea guards retrieve your body to bury early enough.

Be careful of what you wish for.

After I saw this thread, I put a call through to the President to find out his plans to curtail such in Nigeria.

Acidtalk - Your Excellency sir, Goddday.

Jonathan - Yes, What can I do for you?

Acidtalk - Just called to greet you your Excellency.

Jonathan - Don't greet me Acidtalk. I see your comments about me and my government so don't act like you like me.

Acidtalk - Sir, I am only stating the obvious truth.

Jonathan - Now what can I do for you?

Acidtalk - What steps are you taking to avoid an occurence of Hurricane Sandy in Nigeria?

Jonathan - Well, as you can see, it will have no effect on us.

Acidtalk - Who are the us?

Jonathan - Me, Babangida, AbdulSalam, Obasanjo, Danjuma and others.

Acidtalk - What do you mean sir?

Jonathan - We all reside on Hilltop. 50-120feet above ground level so no way the water can get to us in our hilltops.

Acidtalk - What of the common man sir?

Jonathan - What else will they expect us to do than to setup relief and rehabilitation camps. Tell Aki and Pawpaw, Genevieve, Don Jazzy, Tiwa Savage, Dr Sid, Obesere, Pasuman, Daddy Showkey and others to visit them. We will also send few bags of rice, salt, cartons of indomie and soap to them.

Acidtalk - And?

Jonathan - And what? Of course in no time they will forget their predicament especially when we tell them we have Setup several committees to look at the causes of the hurricane. We will setup committess to go to Heaven to find out why it happend, Committee to go to hell to do its own findings, Committee to discover how much profit we can make in the reconstruction and others.

Acidtalk - Is that all sir?

Jonathan - What else do you want to hear? Okay I and the 36 state governors will relocate our offices for that period to the Bahamas.

Acidtalk - Hmmm!!!!

Jonathan - Hmmm your head. Una never start.

I declare every wind of Hurricane Sandy to Aso Rock, the 36 government houses and the National and State House of Assembly.
May the wind and havock not affect the Average and Poor man in the society because they neither have money to go for Medical threatment in Germany nor House to relocate to in Dubai.

Is that the name of a Militant, Kidnapper, or Oil Bunkerer?