₦airaland Forum

harbarzzy:
how old are Ada? By the time you are 40 then you will begin to feel the senses in this write up.

Stale...

chinchum:
@Toks2008 , the best of relationships are the ones a lady at the very least slightly loves her man more than he loves her, yes it is essential there is mutual love, that kind of arrangement makes a lady to easily give respect and care the two topmost things a man cherishes in a relationship, and the man showers love to the lady in return. The equilibrium is easily maintained. Ladies might not confess this, but they struggle to RESPECT a man who loves them when they don't. You know how men view respect in a relationship, dont you?

The funny thing is, with all the things men claim to know, they've not been able to realise the bold...

I Tweaked your post a little because a guy's love might be more but if she loves him too, she'll appreciate his love and respect him much more. But I can tell you, if she doesn't love him, it'll be a struggle and accept my sympathy if she decides to stop struggling...

I think guys should be more scared of getting married to a girl that doesn't love them sef... unu a na koeri eba...

Rinato:
if u would be loved, love and be loveable. It is possible that two people feel attraction toward each other at first meeting, but it doesn't always happen that way. Most times there is a need to be loveable. Saying if you don't love him its a no vice-versa is a no is considered by me a childish thing to say. I only imagined a lady close to 35 yrs of age say that.. Of course it ll be rare but a 25 yrs can still say that. What m I pointing out here ? The difference is now their level of experience. I believe the op was trying to clarify it is always good to swallow your pride and make yourself loveable, and even the most despicable man will find a soft spot, which is true. Its basically a question of contentment.

No sir, the difference is the level of desperation...

Truth is this, I might have a level of pride but that is definitely not what it's about... And I'll restate it, I will not be getting married to someone I don't love. It's a personal thing, not generalised and you cannot probably because you're a man and I Woman decide for me if it'll be or is a good decision for me.

I'm human, you're human and so I believe we all have brains and can think and decide for ourselves so... if you want, marry someone that doesn't love you or vice versa it's not my problem.

Girls think celebrity is sexually(or in this case babily) transmitted...

Well, it is but after a while, no one will care so... whatchu gon do? Open wide for another?

andromida:
Ha ha the whole family?

I'm telling you, the man is just clowning around...

hujiedit:
This is exactly why I don't reveal my wealth to ladies, I simply be on my jean and top

But... what wealth do you even have?

czarr:
BECAUSE?


WE CAN!!!!!!!!

Simple...

Mindfulness:
You were insecure before you got married ('everyone was married but me') and you are insecure after you got married (but when I say that marriage is not the magic cure for happiness, people will argue. )

The reason why you feel insecure is not your husband's appearance, the reason why you feel insecure is inside of you and it will follow you wherever you go.

@bold then they(guys) will start with that crappy cliché "single women cry all night"...

People think once you're married as a woman, you've finally made it and all will be right in the world...

Anyhoo @op I think the real problem is he doesn't also have money. You know, it's a known fact that if a woman doesn't see money, she starts noticing other faults, same can be said for a sexstarved man...

But uhm to be serious, love is a choice like someone said so learn to love him.

More importantly tho, work on your confidence, maybe get busy and actually do well at something(you'll find that solving problems, adding value to something or someone brings a sense of fulfilment and happiness), hit the gym(with your hubby if possible, great confidence booster), engage in outdoor activities in leisure time, just find ways to be happy with yourself.

Don't be deceived, you'll always care about what people say about you, what makes a difference is if you let the negativity affect you or not which of course is a function of how happy and content you are with your life.

poshestmina:
Two options
If he is poor,straight DIVORCE
If he is as rich as Dangote or as generous as DASUKI, will stay with him for like a year


Amass enoooough money

And still Divorce him

Straight up!!!

Slowly, niggaz now think of forgiving a cheating girl?

The world has officially come to an... well... ehm...

Op, I didn't read the story sha but I don't know why you brought this here because what is on your mind is what you'll still do at the end of the day so I'm guessing this is just to seek justification.

If you wanna forgive and have her back, do that, if not? Don't... the matter is really that simple...

What tha?!

spacks:
it's better to have a carry over and later clear it well than having an E

That's what people say but one of my friends calculated it, using CGPA method, the guy with E had a slightly higher CGPA than the carryover A guy when every other grade for other courses remained the same. It's almost the same thing and how many people have A's in carryovers??

I saw it and I was shocked to the core. Pass all courses if you can, don't spread falsehood unless you have proof...

haibe:
Am still looking for where he said exam malpractice isn't a sin

Well... Happy looking...

iyke926:
I never had a carry over.


OP, I never went to the library... too quiet. And you forgot something important...cramming. Read, study well and cram...cram... cram... Cram hard. Naija lecturers love it when u give them what's on their note during exams.

When u have few brainy friends your academic life go tight.

Don't ever sit close to a dull student during exams. You will end up answering only 3 questions instead of 5.


Don't ever give bribe to pass a course. It's a sin and one of its punishment is more carryovers.

Bribery is sin but exam malpractice isn't??

Greatest Nigerian Student!!

mineANDurs:
...

Its beta to b without a husband than to b wt one that beats her.

Hehe... is that what she told you?

In Nigeria, so long as Mrs is attached to your name, you're good to go.

kallmemrB:
Its not a sin joor cos that's the same way they deduct our money for no just cause or subscribe you to a plan you know nothing abt

Lol!

So, someone steals your laptop, sells it to get a new one and you strike back to steal his laptop, it's not stealing after all he stole yours first.

Omotayor123:
Hmmm... I just hate the word "You are sexy"
To me, it automatically means "You are good for Sex"

To the ladies, the way you dress is the way you will be address.
Toks well done!

I guess I'm not alone on the "sexy" boat... it irks me to the core...

Couldn't read it all sha but it's not the girls, it's the culture or should I say mentality of the people.

Let's face it, in this part of the world, men are raised differently from women save for a few homes with literate parents.

I'd like to say a lot more but I literally don't have the strength. But notice how if a girl is fair(in most cases) and fine, her mum treats her like a queen and spoils her but if she's a not, she makes her work her butt off in the kitchen and home? That's where it all starts...

Happy new year Mr Toks...

Since he's capable, how about surrogacy? Everybody literally wins...

Fynestboi:
As one of the judges ma.

Oh wow... I'll drop by as much as I can but that won't be enough because I'm in a remote area right now.

Keep up the good work.

Fynestboi:
https://www.nairaland.com/adaeze003

Hi... I just saw this mention and I'm not sure what it's for. You want me to participate in the debate or?

johnson232:
adaeze!
what if u happen's to be his future wife?

u can't tell where love will lead u....

looking at it from biblical perspective, he's got a point....
except u choose to be insincere...

the bible presuppose women as property of men....

I'm really not in the mood for biblical arguments. Thing is, we all interpret different things from the same bible so what's the point?

But feel free to see your wife as your property sha. Me? Love cannot lead me to anyone that can't reason properly so... no thanks.

quivah:
Shhhh why na?
Since hes going to 'buy' his wife and not you, leave him to enjoy his property na..

Bible din't classify women as humans but living things... Jesu Kristi
And women are bought with a price..
I thought Jesus also paid a price 4 Christians.. Irreversibly,we are all bought..and as our prof rightly put, we are all things.
That guy na mumu grade 1.

PS;
Na im people be thing, I mean tin.. Pangolo

Lol I even forgot the "not humans but living things" part...

JudgementHammer:
O baby, ur brain dey reverse gear? Even d bible says he who finds a wife finds a good "thing". In another place it called them weaker "vessels". The bible don't usually classify dem as humans but living things dat shd be loved and cherished. Dats why they're built to attract. Both thing and vessel are ownable things that can be bought. The bible also says "wives u are bought with a price"

So u old reach like dis and u no knw say any man weh work hard to pay ur bride price na hm own u. Lol make I remind u welwel o..ur father and mother will take ur hand and hand u over to d man that paid 4 u on ur wedding day. Better learn to build ur life around dat truth so u will find marriage easier. U 4 tell God to make u a man from heaven na.

Lol... at first I just thought to ignore this post but...

Firstly... you interpreted "he who finds a wife finds a good thing" as the bible equating us to things not humans Haba brother! Ever heard of "figure of speech"?

Then you went on to say weaker vessels also meant we're things? Lol... didn't it by the slightest chance occur to you that since we're weaker vessels, guys are stronger vessels and as such, you are as much a THING as the next girl?

But how shallow can a human get

Anyhoo... extend my sympathy to your future wife...

*bows out*

Seyibabalola:
Vain things but they are necessary too dear. Na only dull man no go like or want such features ooo.

Vain things but they are necessary too dear. Na only dull man no go like or want such features ooo.

Eh na then stop to cry abeg... go for what you want, let the ladies do same. Abi na water she wan take package boobs and behind well??

JudgementHammer:
My dear even d creator of marriage himself made it clear that they can't be equal. One is to submit, the other is to love. Except God no knw wetin hm dey do. What makes d difference is d measure of love u get from ur man.

Abeg if they're not men's properties, then whose properties are they...animals?
Its liabilities that they shouldn't be. Once I pay bride price, and u,ve been handedover to me as my wife, then ure my property to love n cherish.

See ehn just pray that God gives u ur own man who'll understand u and have enough to love u well. Love conquers all. All this divorce-provoking steps weh u dey follow will just end u up a single parent o.

I'm sorry, women or rather, the woman you'll get married to is a thing that you'll love and cherish? Like a newspaper or nice shoe?

Last time I checked, the word "property" meant a THING you own.

If yes then well... good luck to her.

**Smh this stupiid bride price thingy really has us in for it...

The way men write... like they don't expect anything from their wives...

Like a man who likes big butts will settle for a flattie

Or a big boobz guy will settle for flat chest...

Or a sucker for intelligent conversations will marry a materialistic "dumbo"...

Btw, I know my post is a little shallow(yes, I know so no need to tell me) but ya'll really have to stop crying...

I'm sure you see girls who don't mind starting from scratch with u but your big eyes are on that tall, fine, round ass n boobs sisi ...

Only come to make noise if you don't desire vain things yourself.

Leave the crying for husband scarcity to us mbok...

La click la bend...

Acidosis:
I'll give you a reply "offline"

smh

Lol... tiok it here oh!

Acidosis:
Any woman that rejects 15m in place of a white collar job would find it very difficult to make it in life. Such women are categorically, intellectually and perpetually lazy.

N15m is enough to build your white collar job (dream job). If you don't know what to do with N15m, then you shouldn't be hustling for any job at all cos you will kill and destroy the handiwork of your employer.

If you can't work with N15m, how then will you build someone else's business? Even if you work with a federal agency (level 8-9), you can't save N15m in 15 years assuming you save 40% of your income monthly.

Employers don't just employ people to sit their lazy asrses down and take selfies. You're employed to work, and make money for your employer.

NB: if her reason is based on lack of experience, no feasible business plan, or fear of failure, then an understanding husband would certainly see reasons with the wife.

Majority of career women whose husbands are very rich however only go to work to 'show face,' they spend more than they earn. They earn very little, but spend extravagantly from hubby's purse. Such career-driven women do not deserve any 'office' job. They do this to "belong" and escape (1) house chores (2) loneliness.

Have you been to lagos? Have you seen the number of startups that fold everyday??

Believe it or not, not everyone has the entrepreneurial spirit or should I say mind and giving someone 15m does not earn the person that. And need I remind you that some people actually work well under others? And in such people's hands, your 15m might go to waste?

Secondly, the husband giving 15m will not want her to grow a firm coz as we know, that will take even more time and there's allot of risk.

Now, the only sort of sure thing is trade. Buy stuff in bulk and retail and we know that's what the op is talking about and that's just as boring as my life can get ... I might just literally die of boredom...

And for those who work when their husbands are wealthy, it could be because it gives them satisfaction you know? Heck me sef, even if I marry dangote, I'll work oh... only maybe not under somebody sha. Believe it or not, being just someone's wife is not enough for some women. Hope I'm making sense?

Anyway, me I'll take your 15m oh! Provided you won't tell me what to do with it. Abi who no like better thing?

Tunchi101:
what's wrong if she chooses to use d money I give her to establish a multi million naira cosmetics enterprise?? . U sure u know what you saying??

Relax...

sickstars:
Yaaaaaaaay mine too partners in crime