₦airaland Forum

oga u no try at all.
a man who can blantantly play with the fate of young kids under his tuition does not deserve mercy.
this so called lecturers have made life unbearable and hellish for countless generations of students.
some have ruined lives of promising people all without a second thought to what tomorrow can possibly bring.

there is no mercy to be thrown to dogs who refuse to give mercy.
you have subverted karma by turning the other cheek.

May the lives of the other students that bastard lecturer ruined judge you.

the lecturer wont escape it. He will surely fall into the hands of someone who will demand retribution.

PS don't mind all those feminists telling you to forgive and forget. Don't mind all those peeps telling you to send her out as well.
There is no such thing as forgiveness of impulsive stupidity or impulsive disrespect.
Boundaries with respect to behaviors have to be set and expectations clearly spelt out.
You need to be in 100% leadership of your relationship/home.
You only send a woman away and end the marriage when it's 100% clear she is unteachable/untrainable.

Bruv it's clear u really aren't in control of your relationship. U can't have 2captains stirring the same ship. If your wife does not fear or respect you enough to spit in your face. She can never respect you as the head of her home. I shudder to think what would happen to you if she was the only breadwinner in your household.
From your writeup I case you are clearly being taken for granted. Your wife's expectations are clear on the fact that she knows she can take advantage of your mild manners and patience. She is only now exploring and expanding the limits of what she believes.
Patience of a leader does not have to tolerate stupidity or foolishness. Patience ensures that's every possible wrong presumption is addressed and corrected.
If you intend to continue the marriage. Her spitting on you is clearly something you must deal with and something you must make sure she would never in a million years think of doing.
My advice: talk to your older friends and fashion out a well thought out plan to correct her thinking and please find a way of protecting yourselve. You don't want to end up on the wrong end of a knife. I d advise you to keep away from your home for a while and watch her reaction. If that doesn't do the trick you may need to escalate your tactics further.
Noone especially your wife should take you for granted.
It is totally unacceptable.

EgunMogaji:
I'm going to tell you what you should do. You won't do it. That's okay. You'll thank me in a year or two.

Here's what you should do.

1) Pack your portmanteau with as much as you can.

2) Check into a hotel, a long stay one.

3) Find an apartment.

4) Live your life.

Here's what's going to happen if you don't.

1) She'll kill you

2) You'll kill her

3) You'll be in jail

Good luck

PS: your wife has you completely and pathetically subjugated.

PPS: I'm on my 3rd marriage. Life is supposed to be gay, merry and joyous. Anyone that waylays that gets carved out of my life like a cancerous growth.

Gbam..... Mad advice why make sense........ No time for stupidity and mad women

Pangea:

This is a battle field injury o!
These robbers are inhuman!
May God never allow our path to cross with theirs in Jesus name!

I really love the quote on yr username

Fact:
1. Drugs science and medical research seem reliable. Why doesn't God seem reliable?
2. Calling someone or something your God is a contract. It means certain responsibilities are automatically assigned to both parties. It seems to me that Nigerians in general don't have or know any expectations of their God. If I have a God I expect and understand that certain things are expected of me from him and him from me.
3. I note that clearly very few people take the time to examine and critically question their beliefs. When you know you have a short time on this earth and your beliefs will certainly influence what story your life will take. will you not want to be certain that you are on the right way?

I have made the following decisions with respect my life.
1. That I am 100% responsible for the course of my life. No 3rd party opinion, belief nor story will make me give over my responsibility/life to any ideal belief or person
2. I will not blindly follow anyone or any God
3. If God wants me as his servant/worshipper. It's his responsibility to prove himself to be God and not mine.
4. I will not ascribe to God what clearly was achieved by another.
5.if any being or power is capable of a miracle he or she is capable of letting people know he is responsible for his act Without the help of other items like drugs

Fact:
1. Drugs science and medical research seem reliable. Why doesn't God seem reliable?
2. Calling someone or something your God is a contract. It means certain responsibilities are automatically assigned to both parties. It seems to me that Nigerians in general don't have or know any expectations of their God. If I have a God I expect and understand that certain things are expected of me from him and him from me.
3. I note that clearly very few people take the time to examine and critically question their beliefs. When you know you have a short time on this earth and your beliefs will certainly influence what story your life will take. will you not want to be certain that you are on the right way?

I have made the following decisions with respect my life.
1. That I am 100% responsible for the course of my life. No 3rd party opinion, belief nor story will make me give over my responsibility/life to any ideal belief or person
2. I will not blindly follow anyone or any God
3. If God wants me as his servant/worshipper. It's his responsibility to prove himself to be God and not mine.
4. I will not ascribe to God what clearly was achieved by another.
5.if any being or power is capable of a miracle he or she is capable of letting people know he is responsible for his act Without the help of others

This is a very interesting topic. I fear that most contributors aren't doing it enough justice. I believe most of the contributions to this thread aren't married and haven't gone through the stage of seeking pastors spiritualist when they were ready to marry.

This are my humble contributions. Pls kindly note this are my opinions and my personal beliefs after passing through the subjective phenomena that we call life. If your beliefs differ or are opposing I clearly do not give a f&$k what you think or what u believe. I can only hold firm to my own life experiences and where they lead me to.
1. All of this so called pastors are liars. There is not one amongst them that sees a single thing. They can't see anything to save their own lives or save any other persons life

2. A large percentage of people have consulted pastors and spiritualist still end up divorced.

3. If you have a nagging feeling that you are making a wrong choice with respect marriage, you probably are. My advice to you would be to take some time out of the relationship, take some time away from all the pressure and clearly define the following.

A. Your assumptions
You may need to be clear on this. Wrong assumptions will set on a wrong road to a hell of a life. We all make decisions based on what we know or believe to be true. Be wise and test what you assume to be true about yourself your intended spouse and the generality of your situation

B. Ask yourself if you can live with this person in the same house under the worst of circumstances and still be happy. If your answer is yes. I believe you have solved at least 50% of the marriage puzzle.

C. Do not accept any pressure from external people about your choice of marriage. Make it clear to all parties inclusive of parents, friends and relative that they will not be the ones living with the choice of wife made. Most humans are useless with their good intentions. The road to hell is paved with good intentions. Nobody but you should know what's good for you. If you don't know what's good for you you are on a long thing and clearly not ready to get married.

That's all I have for now in my head. Hit like if you are thoughtful and learnt something from all that's said I just might add more lessons from my life experiences.

ax2xb: 4 posters above me have advised me to collect the car back . . .
I guessed as much, and yes I bought the car for her cos I was ready to marry her . . .I gave her all the good tins of life and made her look good . .
for some other guy I guess . . Dont know?
But right now, it's just so obvious the handwriting's on the wall . . .There's a lot more I would rather not say unless of course, i;m being asked.
But seriously, am baffled, how can a 29yr old not know the difference between the taste of salt and of sugar?


*Runs off to collect the car . . .

wtf

tai2: Any man who thinks that showing more love, trying to reason or arguing with a cantankerous woman or a woman who lacks respect is the way forward, is out of his mind.

Women, especially Nigerian women, do not know the meaning of equality in a relationship. To them equality is a weakness and once they see you as weak it turns to a lack of respect.

If OP was being a man, his wife would not try this nonsense. First he got railroaded into marrying her because she was pregnant. Then now she wants to control the house, I'd ask him to DNA check those kids to make sure they're his. A woman who does not respect you and shows contempt to your parents can sleep with everyone from your guard to your next door neighbor.

That's the problem with all these fellowship and bible-business relationships. It starts off on an assumption that the world is good and certain "moral" standards must be followed. All woman thirst after bad boys, yet when some want to marry they look for a mugu to get married to.

The OP has probably refrained from dealing with his wife in the appropriate manner based on "biblical reasoning", trying to rationalize or be a loving husband. All moves which in my opinion are stupid and pointless. She's only pulling off all this rubbish because you're being a weakling and she has no respect.

Leave all these "new worlders" talking about slapping a woman being barbaric. Even in the so-called developed world, it was a tool for putting women in line until political correctness came into the world 30-40 years ago. Ever watched a Sean Connery Bond movie, he slapped plenty an erring broad.

Don't get me wrong, I believe if a woman errs to the point of total disrespect, a slap is only merited once in the lifetime of a relationship. Any woman who does not get the point after that should be divorced or disengaged from, don't let anyone turn you to a murderer or sadist.

Sometimes there are other ways of getting your point across. Arguing with her is a sign of weakness. If she is unreasonable so is reasoning with her. You can either choose to ignore or let her know that continuing with that attitude will earn her a divorce. If you choose you can start by locking the devil out of your house.

You're in an unfortunate position, but you need to correct it before you end up with further years of misery. This is Nigeria, where women want equality in order to disrespect a man, but won't remember equality when it comes to comes to contributing to the upkeep of a home or splitting a restaurant bill.

There are enough good and well-trained Nigerian women out there especially with scarcity of husbands, who deserve a meaningful relationship where problems are settled maturedly and everyone contributes their quota to making things work. Unfortunately, I don't know where you people meet these devils you end up marrying.

If you had read this thread before you met her, you wouldn't be suffering this nonsense now:

https://www.nairaland.com/396243/how-maintain-control-woman

guy you are so on point...................
man u just made my day!!!!!!!

ladyinred: New things I've learnt today abt marriage, based on the OP and some comments on here,
1. when 2 consenting adults hv s*x without protectn and sum1 ends up pregnant, d girl was trying 2 trap d guy into marriage all along.is she stupid does the bit.ch not know what postinol is? having sex does not mean i want a baby
2. for some men, when it comes 2 family, wives don't count: it's jst their parents, children and siblings. ladyinred everyone has their place. a woman is not a replacement of the man's family but an important part of it
3. for those men magnanimous enuf 2 think of their wives as family, said wives r d least important members of d family, and ofcourse replaceable.if a woman cannot make her home into a paradise for the couple and does not endevour to do her best in making her marraige workable then yes she becomes unimportant and hence replaceable
4. ur mother must always come b4 ur wife- always strive 2 make mummy happy even at wifey's xpense: never mind abt ur wife. she doesn't count anyway.I will repeat it again a wife cannot take the place of a mother neither can a mother take the place of a wife. please let this be clear your mother in law is not your rival!!! unless u happen to be a control freak. when you have your child u will understand
5. it's ok for u and ur parents 2 decide where ur kids live and where they shld spend their holidays without informing d kids' mother b4 hand. Reason? Refer to 4.the husband should have discussed with his wife prior to taking them for the holidays. however that does not permit or excuse or permit the womans bad behaviour
6. a husband is d commander-in-chief of his wife: anything he says, goes. No arguments. Absolute obedience is required from Wifey at all times.yes he is, he is meant to be her leader and not her bit.ch, however a good leader carries along his/her followers.
7. any wife dat 4gets her place and shows her humanity, is a witch.an woman that forgets her place and shows advanced stupidity/or takes blind advice is worse than a witch. she is a killer and murderer of the best of men. she cannot make or ra
8. if ur wife starts saying no to certain things u do, or starts having a mind of her own and stops being ur doormat, u've 2 show her who's d boss.pls stop talking in obtuse terms if she says no to the right things, or behaves the way goats who have minds of their own then it is our responsibility as men to show her the right way to behave or show her the way out. life is too short and beautiful to tolerate nuisances and animalistic behaviour
9. start by scolding and threatening her. if that doesn't wrk, corporal punishment is required: Slapping, kicking, flogging, punching and back-flipping are all viable options. Just make sure she gets d message. Beat her to submission.actually that is a form of treatment for the cases of women who have crossed the line of civility and humanity. there are a lot more worse treatment to give a woman
10. when u're bored with 9, throw her out of ur house. Afterall, she's disposable.when she stops being reliable or being a helpmeet and starts behaving like a wild animal that cant be tamed, then she becomes a epidemic strain of disease that needs to be terminated before causing more damage
Happy married life, people!

get this straight......
you cant expect to plant discord, lack of harmony in your marriage and expect something good out of it.
not everyman will tolerate nonesensical behaviour........
some of us do have high standards

Wots with dis guy are u a feminist or lesbians boy [quote author=Mynd_44]Tribalist, acting childish and behaving like a demi-god. I am out of here[/quote]

Miss Shakara: Yes of course! You need photos, what of videos? Don't you need videos to be sure the photos aren't photoshopped? Even that may not be enough for you, she should probably come to your place to show you her bruises so you can confirm it is actual blood and not paint. Will that be okay Mr "empirical evidence".
And you should be provided with evidence as the policeman, Attorney and Judge all rolled in one! Smh! Nonsense! Feeling punk like what you think matters! Who gives a f**k about your opinion in this matter

were u born stupid or did your mother drop u on ur head.

Knowledge9000: Another Feminist trend to tell us MEN how to behave. Further and continuation of the emasculation of today's men. One of the goals of the feminists (not to be mistaken with feminist movement which I support) is to make every woman appear important to men. In other words, an ugly woman or a woman who has virtually nothing tangible to offer to her counterpart can make herself seem important to an handsome, wealthy, accomplished/successful man with unnecessary requirements. This is the goal of feminists and you see this ubiquitous in today's society. Now, men who are very secure and sure of themselves don't typically fall victims for this; however majority of men fall for this and would often think there is something wrong with them...no there isn't. You just have to be very sure in yourself and stand your ground, your belief, don't impress any woman. If she truly likes you, You must lead and she must conform to your lifestyle, your budget and directions as a man; tell her to kiss your a$ss. If a woman has to tell you what to do, how to behave, then you seriously need to check yourself as a man. Man up men! Nothing wrong doing all these but SHE HAS TO EARN IT...being great wife(not girlfriend) and given you beautiful children.

Bruv.......
tight commentary loving it.......
u a real negro!!!

CocoLoca: Ashawo na sales woMAN too. My fellow widows NL babes, feel free to share your experiences.

Please i was just joking o!

carry go joor
if them no like am dey can go and what
They can go and die!!!!!

[quote author=A.jeez]Yea..I think he is..av seen the songs too..dnt knw wats wrng with the guy suddenly..he used to b a cool nice and talented dude(still got d talents though). Nw all of a sudden he turned this ego centric, self hyping rastaMan..dnt knw where he got dat frm[/quote]Dude the guy get the talent........
he deserves the hype..........

SERIOUSLY THERE A LOT OF PUSSY-WIPPED NIGURS ON THIS THREAD!!!
I dont think a lot of men understand their god given roles as men.
Football is a passion and hobby for a lot of people!!!
She has her hobbies and passions. I should respect hers and she should respect mine!!!
Why would my wife lock me out because i went to watch ball!!!

Why would my wife tell me to choose between football and her!!!
a. She don dey mad
b. she don drink
c. she just watch nollywood/gollywood movie
d. she just smoke weed
e. she really needs a taste of my strong love-vendor hand
e. i m a spineless bitcchass niggur
f. needs some drama before some really hard core sexxxing

choose one na multiple choice question.............

The fact that she can even ask you and u are seriously considering the request,
actually says a lot about who makes decisions in your house.

Marriage is for enjoyment and is not a shackle/prison,
any silly woman wey try am no go like my immediate reaction.

this one na another work abeg..........
u no go get time for anything else........

onila are u based in equitoral guinea?

I m currently working in EG, its not too easy meeting fellow nigerians.

Abeg i don dey lonely o.make we meet o

Too many como estas,biem, muchos gustus i never hear ekaro since......

oga u be real mumuni
u still dey ask question?
run for ur life

[quote author=c++_crazy]am not the first to comment here but am sure this is my first post in nairaland with this my new handle and I want this my 17th handle to be clean and free from ban, hidden comments and castigations like my previous ones ie why I'l try as much as possible to avoid threads in the muslim section, the religion section, the sports and celebrities and by the way which section am I now? I know am asking myself that question. I also hope to be the last to post here cos many people don't like threads like this either cos of guilt or jealousy, am guilty of the former. I will congratulate the boy very well cos he had something I so much neglected and that is will power, even though am vulnerable to being distracted by frivolities, I can still boast that I don't derail so much or to long from my basis, I know U'l be expecting me to say it, ie my personal something and me being conservative in that matter is cos of personal reasons. I love my life and seek out for what is good in others. Through out my stay in this planet as a human being, I had so many aspirations like, when I was 2, I wanted to be a pastor, at 5 yrs it changed to being an astronaut cos i read so many books about them den, at 10, it was to be a medical doctor but discovered at 14 dat I fainted when my mum was circumcising one baby in her clinic den so I had to readvice myself, at 15 I decided dat it was mechanical engineering, when it was time to register jamb, my mind swept through so many factors, i wanted to go into medicine again cos of the passion I had for human lives and how much i loved biology, but on a second Thought, i remembered how much am addicted to machines and electronics, how i can't imagine not playing with computers again, so I went for mechanical engineering den at futo cos almost all my mates dat wanted to study engineering den applied to futo, den futo was d anchor point for marist students who wanted to do engineering, unfortunately for me post ume was introduced and it trimmed most of us out, d next yr i wrote for mechanical engineering at unn and was 3 points away from cuttoff mark, entered oko poly for electrical engineering, after a year wrote anoda jamb for electrical engineering to unn, thank God ie where I graduated and will go for Nysc batch B dz year, I've not seen my cgp as it will be released after senate meeting by april 16th or so but don't expect me to tell you then. I fell in love with programming although haven't mastered any of the languages am learning like c which i started with, did some of python before perl and now c++, am now rediverting all my energy to master c++ and praying that the will power which I never had can sprout from somewhere and hope God helps me with his grace weld dat discipline to accomplish my aim. Thank you thank you for reading through and may God bless you. Amen


u are high on something[/quote]

anotha stupid oga at the top

oga at the top needs to do somrthing about this !!!!!

[quote author=lord.spiritual]saw he also 'smmoocccheed' a female fan on stage...[/quote]omo na herpes this guy dey play with so.......

NA DEIVERANCE FROM POVERTY MI DEY LOOK FOR!!!!

Bros really appreciate ur efforts in helping please can you help me with activation code for a dictionary too.
My dictionary name is Collins english dictionary 2011 complete and unabridged

my IMEI -357360.03.921588.1

Bros really appreciate ur efforts in helping please can you help me with activation code for a dictionary too.
My dictionary name is Collins english dictionary 2011 complete and unabridged


my IMEI -357360.03.921588.1

ebamma: that pastor is doing his business today by preaching and collecting tithes, seun too is also doing his business by posting it here and getting views and adverts, me and u are the only losers here, ask yourself after reading this, 'what is my gain?

we learn oga and become more informed

Chinwem: Forever young......Kate Henshaw

I swear if she go gree marry mi I gbadun de chick die

na american hustler

decepticos: Full metal alchemist; alphonso elric and his brother, the seven deadly sins personified,e.t.c
Naruto; in one word awesome, the most painfull event was yahiko under pains controll killed jiraya, the next was Asumas death. what do u guys think of the biju mode.
Bleach; ichigo lost his shinigami reiatsu, i stopped wia he teamed up with some odd bunch since soul society was far off.
Fairy tail; Natsu, ezra and gray the super wizard team oh sorry i just remembered lucy. The strongest is Gildarts or so they say. stopped were the dark wizard was found on the fairy tail island, cant get his name again.
Trigun; amazingly funny gunslinger
Claymore; i felt i wazted money to get the dvd but it seems to have a great hype online, i am not a fan of strong women though i appreciate them sword and)onball Z: when Goku died of an illness i was unhappy i was like y not piccollo, and the funny issue of them turning into a super monster on a full moon unless their tail is cut off. saiyans are what they are called. cant forget the ease with which he learnt the kami ha mey ha.
ok thats anime for me though i just came accross Fung wa (wind and cloud)
Samurai X; unforgettable the battousai, smilling killers.
Despicable me
Danger mouse
Tom and jerry
Afro samurai ressurection
The Boondocks
Samurai sumo.

GUY CLAYMORE IS A BAD ASS CLASSIC, ITS SO PAINFUL I HAVE TO WAIT EVERY MONTH FOR A NEW ONE
DAMN
BAD ASS CHICKS