₦airaland Forum

vislabraye:
When You marry the right guy, you will know .

Close ya legs till you wanna get married. When u find the Mr Right, marry him and stay faithful. Guys are not angels you know.

. . .and that guarantees what exactly. . .the perfect man?

[quote author=Lord_Reed link=topic=685156.msg8474657#msg8474657 date=1307476066]So in other words since we are all in an unpredictable world with no guarantees WTF do you want from a man then?[/quote]nothing.

SOPRANO:
[b][/b] @ OP:

you want to know the secret?

JUST BE YOURSELF

If a man loves you, all other things are secondary; he will go to the end of the world for you if required. As you've rightly stated, men r physical creature. we are instantly attracted to the physical attributes, but what comes afterwards will determine if we stay with you or keep it sexually platonic or just disappear totally. The vibes you give a man will determine what he wants with you, and if you stray from who you are just to please him; then u've made the greatest mistake ever. There will be a point where your true self will emerge, then it will be too late for him to adapt to the new you.

Immediately a man sees/meet a woman, He already knows what he want with her, either Casual S.ex, Friendship, or Relationship. However; in some exeptions, getting to know you might reveal something he never thought he likes in a woman.

with issue of men talking bad about women they've had s.ex with, i tagged those men "Grown-boys" with Juvenile Inferior libido Deliquency. if a grown-boy call a girl he had s.ex with a "LovePeddler", then he is a LovePeddler himself for sleeping with her to begin with.

so just be yourself, and a man that trully love you will take everything that comes with it, [b][/b]

I was just asking a general question. you are making it sound like i want a relationship.

Ifedisky:
ROFL!, Moaning, moanful!!. When people are not intelligent enough to be perceptive what do they do? Moan! Some women are runaway successes wiv men no matter who the men are. Are they magicians? Asking what a man wants is akin to asking the direction the wind blows. It is subject to much vagaries and only the perceptive will know. It is not a man's fault that beyond sexuality a lotta women do not believe they have anything to offer in a relationship. So what they offer, the guy's take and mock them
Unless women do not believe some of their folks enjoy mutually enjoyable, respectful and fulfilling relationships with the menfolk, it will be wise to ask these women how it is they do it. Leave the men outta it. I do not have to ask my girlfriend why, attimes, she is hysterical and unreasonable. I find out. So yu babes find out!

Being in a relationship is not winning the lottery. Some women opt out of relationships sometimes because of the unpredictable nature of man and vice-versa. Not everyone in a relationship is happy. And there's no guarantee that even those in a happy perfect relationship would remain so forever. Marriages break, relationships break. So, i can't ask those women in fulfilling relationships how they got there because even them can't guarantee it would remain so forever. . .

190:

Excuse me, I once dashed a girl Half a million naira without looking back

(

Yeah right!

[quote author=Mrs.Chima link=topic=685156.msg8473555#msg8473555 date=1307464111]OP.

Are you asking men that ARE ACTUALLY in a relationship of any kind or WISH TO BE in a relationship?

If you are talking about men that are in a relationship aren't usually picky because they wouldn't be with the chick if she didn't meet MOST of his preferences.  

If you are talking about men that WISH to be in a relationship, ENOUGH SAID.   [/quote]I'm talking about neither. . .Men are not divided into only these two groups you know.

190:
Excuse me ERMAC  

In regards to this --->



Can i please say i am currently been chased by 2 ladies in their early 20s one offering to be my baby mama and the other unleashing blackberries,money, gifts and even almost taking me to Brazil for summer holiday just to lay with me,

Well since i am not that cheap and i am a good man i resisted both their temptations, does that make me Cheap -- NOOOOO!!!
So stop generalizing and worry about your boyfriend/man (if u even have) before u generalize  

I said there are exceptions. Maybe you fall under 'the exceptions' i wouldn't know. And for my generalization. . . you guys do that a lot. No harm in that

I know this issue's been drummed time and time again, but i guess i still want to know how the male brains work. What do guys really want? Okay, we know guys are visual people and they are attracted to beautiful women ( naturally) But Being all these cannot guarantee you a good guy willing to keep his willy in check.

On the question of Submissive, good, nice and soft women that take their partners as their lords, the men are divided on that. Some say they want strong independent women that's capable of holding her own any day, and some others prefer the soft women that stroke their egos. But neither of these women personalities would a guy see any day and say, I'm home! If possible, they'd want both type woman personality on one person depending on their mood.

Men are confused creatures, if you're extremely nice, they'd make jokes about you to their friends on what a suck up you are, and how desperate you must be to take all the shit they dish to you.The girl on the other hand may really love the dude and just want's to do stuff that pleases her boo. If on the other hand, you are cold, bitchy and the exact opposite of nice, you earn many a brunt joke about how your heart must be broken a thousand times, and how it'll be broken a million times. If the lady balances the the two personality in moderate proportion, worse. They'll call you a desperado who's had her hearts broken a million times.

You meet someone who matches your chemistry, you Zap them, you become THE CHEAP LovePeddler!

You resist them, and they'll chase you with everything they've got. They'll lie they love you, they'll even promise you marriage . . .spoil you with money and blackberrys, they'll do every thing they possibly can to mess you, and when they finally succeed, you become THE CHEAP LovePeddler! they'd boast to their friends of how they finally got the 'hard to get b.itch', sometimes even giving graphic description of the 'act'.

If the girl is fortunate to see through the guy and he becomes the unfortunate dude who doesn't get the ass after investing so much time money and energy for the thing beneath her skirt, they become fictitious writers, creating stories about how beloved number three was shagged by them, and how she turned out to be indeed the frigid shrew. which is at par to cheap LovePeddler.

You wear make-up, they say you are fake. . . You go natural, they throw jibes at how it seems make up is afraid of your face.

You are witty. . . they say you are a talkative . . . you don't talk . . . they say you have self esteem issues.

Anyways, there's just no pleasing them!

. . .and of course there are exceptions. . .

playboy19:
Because you are unfortunate in your marriage does not mean all marriages are like yours

I'm not married. I'm just a realist, i know these things. The chance of being in a perfect marriage is dwindling by the minute. You can never predict how your marriage will turn out even if the partner you intend marrying is as perfect as they come. Things always changes after marriage. It's better knowing it now so you can be able to manage it later. And won't be surprised if this Kandikane girl turns out to be a 17year old girl. She definitely sounds like one, no offense meant.

kandiikane:
It does not mean you can disrespect and treat women like me anyhow because the moment I find out you are unfaithful(I have a phobia to it and I mean literally I do not know if they have generated a scientific name for my phobia but they should if they have not) or you don't treat me the way I should its over because before then I have tried my best to please you and do everything in my mighty power for a happy marriage and I will not say I will stay to try and work it out when you disregard everything I have ever done for you. . .There will be no second chances and I will make sure my husband knows it. . .

Okay, in a situation where you suspect but never caught him in the act, would you still take a walk? And about you being the perfect wife for your future husband, you'd never know what marriage entails unless you in it. Outside, it looks blissful, inside it, something else!

People are here, quoting bible passages and talking about submissiveness and all. The thing is, times have changed. What applied then(a 100 years ago and more), doesn't apply now. Then, the men brought home the bacon and the women took care of the home and family, and everyone is happy.

Presently, things have changed. No one wants to marry a liability. They want to marry graduates, working class and even undergrads. Many men want their wives to work in other to supplement his income. And you still want her to be submissive and have no say in how you decide to run the family all the while nodding with approval at your wisdom.

Sorry to burst your bubbles dudes, you can't have it both ways. Look at this scenario : a regular working mum, a good wife. She wakes up say 4 every morning cleans her home, makes breakfast for her family, dress her kids for school, dress herself for work, drives the kids to school, drives to work, picks the kids from school, goes back to work, finishes for the day and comes back home. she makes dinner for the family, clean up for the night, gets the kids to bed and does one or two other things that needs to be done and then wants to turn in for the night by say 11, and her husband who had gone to hangout with his boys straight from his office just came in 5 minutes ago demanding for a freshly hot dinner which the good wife scrambles to prepare. . . after which he wants to shag her and wants her to be as freaky as a LovePeddler. . . she's the good wife, so she rushes to wear her fu.c.k me lingerie that always turns him on. After pleasing her beloved husband who's now snoozing, she tries to sleep, but after what seemed like an hour, her alarm bell shrills and she has to turn it off so as not wake beloved husband. Another day begins for her. . .it goes like this, a continuous circle. She's bound to snap sooner than later.

If you want a submissive wife that would rub your foot, run your baths and screw you senseless, then go to the village, pick an illiterate and  provide her every need or better still you can get a robot, I hear the gynoids are becoming quite popular these days.

kandiikane:
Although I understand other women's view on roles and I have given quotes on both these role I accept that for me personally. . . If I am married and I work and my husband is a house husband- I will definitely not allow that in my house. . If I have a weakling as my husband who says yes to everything I say- I will not allow that in my house. . .For me my role as a wife is to know that my husband is the head of the house, I did not marry him, he married me. I Will summit to him and do what he wants. In my marriage the moment I become the husband and wear the trousers its over. I see husbands who let their wives walk all over them as weaklings aka p[i]uss[/i]ies. I want a man who is a man and knows he is a man and takes no s[Ii]h[/i]it. . . [size=8pt]go to work come back and cook and clean, I will even massage his body if he wants and even clean his backside if worst comes to worst AS long as he treats me good[/size], respects me as a woman,wife,mother, loves me adores me does his best to bring in for the family, treats me like a queen, being faithful,affectionate. . .etc By doing all these for my husband does not me I am below him or whatever you might think but because he is going to be my king and I will do all my best to treat him as such. I am stubborn yes but when it comes to my husband its no joke thing.

Btw, I was brought up in a family which mainly consists of women, where the women actually are the head of the households-being all defensive towards your husband or challenging is not what makes you the head but how you look after yourself, your husband, family and household.

[



Easier said than done!

^^^Just hope you are not being sarcastic, thanks anywayz

@OP you are appalled that how the girl you met in a bus was dying for your good look and that's why you came crying to NL. . . . so we could advice you? I wouldn't want to drum on how shallow that is and blah blah,

So let's say you meet someone. . . there's bound to be some physical feature that you'd like about the person that would make you want to be closer to that person and get to know the innermost person. You can't begin to see the inner qualities of a person when you meet them, all that comes later, so don't judge her. This girl just met you, and she's like's you lips, eyes and whatnot. It doesn't make her shallow. If you don't like her, then you make it known to her subtly and don't make her out to look like the bad person and desperate person.

P.s, you sound boastful and egoistic. Please just take it down a notch or two

cold:
@op,how old are u to begin with

Curious about that too. OP sounds 17 or below

chelseabmw:
@poster
U can NEVER keep a girl, BUT if u have

1. Money
2. Swag
3. Car

then u also know how to fucck her well then u are there. . .i bet u she will never let u go

SECONDED! So little boy, work hard and maybe then you can get to keep your girlfriend forever!

omega25red:
so when did you propose to her and did you give her a ring or you just have a verbal agreement that you will marry her someday?

you owe her nothing before she ran into you she was in school right? how was she paying her fees
On the other hand what types of promises did you make to her? and are you one of those guys who lives above their means? meaning you fly as heck outside but you can't buy a plate of food. I ask because she wont just feel comfotable asking for a 102k if you never gave her the impression that you can just give it away

omega25red:
so when did you propose to her and did you give her a ring or you just have a verbal agreement that you will marry her someday?

you owe her nothing before she ran into you she was in school right? how was she paying her fees
On the other hand what types of promises did you make to her? and are you one of those guys who lives above their means? meaning you fly as heck outside but you can't buy a plate of food. I ask because she wont just feel comfotable asking for a 102k if you never gave her the impression that you can just give it
away

you took the word right out of my mouth. If i was dating and intending to marry a broke ass, I'll understand and manage with him, unless of course i don't know he's broke in which case I'll continue with the incessant demand. The guy has not told us the whole story.

pc guru:
I liked to have one so i can sell it and pay for my IT Exams and some weed.

funny.

but seriously, i too wonder on this hair craze

2buff:
Umm . . . okay. . . 
so it [b]was [/b]meaningless sex, and it [b]was [/b]a worthless relationship and he [b]was [/b]posting an honest sigh of relief from his heart.

This makes him evil scum how?? 
Sounds like you're just angry at the truth.   He didn't post your name so what's your beef?

Now, you are the one being cruel. The way he went about it hurt my feelings that's all. No where did i state he was evil or bad. If he was bad, why then will i fall in love with him? And no, he wasn't heaving a sigh of relief. Probably wasn't talking about me. . . not a day goes by without us seeing each other. Maybe he's not in love with me, but he likes me a lot, and loves my company.

^^^^ well, i guess i'll just take life it comes, if every thing turns out good at the end, FINE! if it doesn't, FINE!

agabaI23:
I can understand it esp when you have some emotional attachment now. But I think it is time you let him know your feelings about him. Let him know that even though you were friends with benefit before, you have falling in love with him and would want to take it further.

If he does not feel the same, then he does not feel the same.
Confront him and lick your wounds now or leak it later. Both ways, it will suck but it is better now than later.

so true, so true,  Thing is, i was thinking of ending the whole thing. There's no future for us. I'm in love with him alright, but that's not enough to sustain a relationship. The guy in question is incredibly handsome and gets a lot of attention from the ladies, I can't compete with that! That aside, there's the age difference, He's a nice guy really, with an incredible sense of humor, unlike many other people, i just can't get bored with him. I'll tell we could just become friends and all that, i wouldn't want to lose him that way too. No more intimacy and stuff,

MzDarkSkin:
[color=#0066ff]
LOL! 

@Amya, I would NEVER judge you. it could have easily been any of us in fact some of us may be going through the exact same thing if not worse.
I hope you have begun to pick you the pieces and will soon get passed the whole ordeal. I am sure you have or will not only accept(ed) your mistakes but learn(ed) from them.[/color]

yeah sure, I've drawn a lot from this experience and the advices. . .

^^^^ people that know me say i overreact. By starting this thread, I'm beginning to  believe it to be true. By not asking him all this i guess i was trying to avoid a scenario like this,

       Me:       Hey, i saw your update on FB. What do you mean by that?

       Dude:   Well, ermm, i've been meaning to you tell you this. I'm in love with someone else, an er, ermm, we can't continue with this anymore,

agabaI23:
.
I think he is you friend you should ask him face to face
So you were not sure that it was not a prank? You should not have posted it here until you were sure.
Nne I metaro ya cha cha.

You said you have not been together in your usual way since then which is not normal. hmmmm

^^^^ well, he didn't act suspiciously or anything, The only thing that he did that was a bit strange was, He was used to showing me pranks and funny stuff he tweets and post on FB. He didn't this time. I was actually hoping it was one of his usual pranks, but by not showing me to get get a laugh from me, then maybe it was serious.

^^^^^ been seeing him everyday. we spent some time yesterday and the day before (not in that way) still couldn't ask him to his face.

agabaI23:
@Amya,

So you did not listen to my advice. Thank God you have removed your picture.
Anybody can access your fb page with that you email address because that's the email in your fb.

Anyway that's your decision.

BTW have you settled with the silly guy?

Well i actually just asked him what he meant by the infamous update now. i sent him a text just now, still awaiting his response.

ak47mann:
just asking

what are you asking?

ak47mann:
well what i can see a fine girl like you makes me happy 1 question if this guy didn't perform well i mean bleep you well will you really send am

what was i thinking? i shouldn't have started this thread. It got blown up out of proportion! didn't even know why it even made front page. I tend to act spontaneous when I'm upset(very bad trait) and see where it got me.  While some posts were were actually helpful, some were out-rightly mean (anyway what was i expecting?)

Please people, take it easy with me. I'm but a mere mortal and i make mistakes too. And please, i wasn't out to look for attention with this thread, i actually try to avoid it at all cost. My only prayer is that all these will die a natural death. Please don't judge me, or go ahead, judge me.