₦airaland Forum

it is not to be

hey not everything can go my way,right?

it just happens that,this particular thingy has never gone my way

am not pissed,funny neither can i say i have resigned to fate

i am just of the opinion that fate is throwing me on a loop

how can one not be lost yet doesnt know where he is?

life is such a twist of mysteries i am not sure i like it

and i am not so sure i would like it if it were not

i feel out of depth yet not entirely consumed

i feel i am on the edge but yet no fear of tipping over

i feel alive,with rekindled hope

mine would be that of not just a happy ending

but a happy journey towards the end too

the wait

the faceless voice

the non visible personality

the dreamless love

the haunted heart

which all leads to the beginin of the end of the long wait

48hours,9,000miles,567,321 hundred words all leads to

to be or not to be

ooo

the nigerian time factor again

lol

i remember back in school

i had to send some invitees back for strutting into my party late

they wanted to make an entrance

i sure gave em an exit lol

crazy bones

lazy bones

who loves to rant

hates to work

has to work to earn a living

day is boring wants to sleep

which sure wont happen

logs on net comes to page looking to spar

place is empty, dude is depressed,its back to counting

******first time out of my zone,walk with trepidation towards the mike*****



smart mouth all sass

full of life and grags

outlaw badass likes to swagger

biker,ruffneck looks like tupac

never cared, never loved heart was empty



quick words,good heart

loves to write,familiy oriented

loves to bake the perfect aunty

determined,principled and full of life

loves to read,loves to write and loves to laugh



they met,he falls she stalls

he is lost,heart bursting head spinning

legs wobbly,but he is a man he is tough

he must act,fronting fails ,his swagger falls


can he tell her

should he tell her

would they tell her

he needs to know

heart in mouth

he decides to tell her

i love you . . . . . . . . . .






_{ok that was crappy. . . .but i had to try being proactive}

vesc. . . . i cant remember recalling you

stillwater. . . .you cant just waltz in and out when you like

doyin. . . . . i am levelheaded too(i wish)

oh am mad at you

but not for the reasons

you presumed but for this:

I guess this year is going to be a year of self examination and self whatever it is that stops one from ranting and raving like an idiot whose just gotten hold of a mic for the first time.

why would i want to stop ranting huh?



and with regards to your twin

i would just marry one of you

which would shut the other up




yeah i really mean that

the rhythm of the sound

its a year a new

fresh dew this morning

a resolution afresh

last year the sounds had a pattern

some i could discern some i was lost to

move to its beat i tried,like a stiff dancer i appeared

let it flow through you they said,its in you,meant to be one with you


but the more i tried

the more i failed

i can hear the beat

why cant i dance to it?

a good dancer moves

fluidly with the sound

is one with the rhythm

insync with the pattern

a perfect dance is the

expression of the sound



this year i would be that

this year i would wait for it

this year i would feel it resonate through me

this year let it flow through me and move me

this year i would interpret it well

this year i would be a translation of the beat












for this is the year

i would be one

with the rhythm of the sounds of my heart









ariblaze

02/01/09

_{sitting on the fence watching the sun shine}

bluepice . . . . . . . . .

you dont get it

no one comes here to spew

greetings . . . . am the lord and dictator of this thread

last warning

happy new year

and tgurl its my thread i should get first shot

now ou ruined my speech naughty



to everyone who stepped into rants

hissed and walked i say ,good instincts


to everyone who stepped into rants read

but had no reason to post, i say na you know o


to everyone who stepped into rants

posted the odd comment here or there,i say be more proactive. . .you are on the right track


to everyone who stepped into rants

felt the blazeman was crazy,a sicko,who just writes crap

but felt a stirring towards the crap he writes

and through the process became a writer of craps in book of rants

i say you made my year

you made me feel more complete

you made me crazier

you made reading fun for me

you made my seclusion from other threads worth it

i say thank you

i say that was 2008

2009 would be one of your best years

a year of self accomplishment

a year of personal redefining

a year of discovering love for all we that believe

a year of cementing friendship

not just handles on a thread

thank you,God bless happy new year

tgurl,bluespice,stillwater,sisijinx,vesc,kay,iice,princesa,cayon and yeah you moyola



i thank you all


blazeman

<sub>10;56am

on the floor in my house</sub>

i see the winch in ya wanna spar

egba re bo loke

emi si eyin,kile mo

biri biri loju ri

boro boro laguntan wo

ibi ta ba ni ki ediye duro si loma wa

ti aba re eni fe eyin ti bi ole' lan re

oya ma fo so ke fo so ke


emi okunrin metta ati abo

ma fi oju e kan emo

ha ah agbara oooooooooooo


if that one doesnt work

i think i would just get the old fashioned trusted cane

the winch inside you and your fellow winches would run away

silly gurl

ok if you say so

you and your brand of broomstick women

have it coming you guys need to fear the blazeman

even your kind should have healthy fear for fire

which is what ama bring with me

moreso you seem not to get the point


i know where you live

i know where you work

i know where you hangout

i know where you worship

i know where your friends live

i know where you shop

and i know what you are wearing err. . . .i mean not wearing

so now i have lost huh?

anyone of you seen eagle eye?

well aria has noting on me

i know where you live

as a matter of fact i can see you right now

blue . . . . . .stop stealing cookies from the jar

princesa . . . . .ladies dont pick their noses

you females have incurred my wrath

and visit you it shall

kill and tell


True! - nervous - very, very dreadfully nervous I had been and am;

but why will you say that I am mad? The disease had sharpened my senses - not destroyed - not dulled them.

Above all was the sense of hearing acute. I heard all things in the heaven and in the earth.

I heard many things in hell. How, then, am I mad? Hearken! and observe how healthily -

how calmly I can tell you the whole story.


It is impossible to say how first the idea entered my brain;

but once conceived, it haunted me hay and night.

Object there was none.

Passion there was none.

I loved the old man.

He had never wronged me.

He had never given me insult.

For his gold I had no desire.

I think it was his eye!

yes, it was this! He had the eye of a vulture

- a pale blue eye, with a film over it.

Whenever it fell upon me, my blood ran cold; and so by degrees - very gradually -

I made up my mind to take the life of the old man, and thus rid myself of the eye forever.

Now this is the point. You fancy me mad.

Madmen know nothing.



But you should have seen me. You should have seen how wisely I proceeded - with what caution - with what foresight - with what dissimulation I went to work! I was never kinder to the old man than during the whole week before I killed him.

aight i know vesc

its boredom aint my fault

the mind is a terrible thing to bore or is it waste?

whatver you get the gist

now i am thinking violence would be the next write

but for whatever reason

my thought just cant spin the yarn

haba, who i offend, i want my mojo back too

Don't ask me, dearie. I wouldn't know about that. As I said, I'm just a neighbour of theirs - that's right, that little white house there on the corner, the one with the fig tree next to it. And yes, I saw it all. Not that I was watching - I believe in keeping myself to myself - but a body couldn't help noticing. First all the coming and going with him being ill, then the weeping and wailing when he died - of course I went to pay my respects, that's only right - and I saw them carry the poor lamb from the village, lay him out proper and wall up the tomb. I did feel sorry for the two girls, I must say.

What? Yes, that's right, dearie. Four days later it was - just as things were getting back to normal. Some sort of preacher. The girls must have sent for him - with never a word to anyone - and up he walked, bold as anything, with a bunch of followers too. You can imagine the talk. And then to go on up to the tomb, with near enough the whole village hard on their heels. No, I didn't go - not decent, I thought, stirring people up, giving them false hopes, but I was wrong, wasn't I? The preacher did it - got them to open the tomb and called out, so they say, and that was that. Back they all came, the two girls crying and hugging their brother, half the crowd jabbering with excitement and the other half - you know, looking sideways and not really sure. I wasn't sure myself, come to that.




does this version ringa bell?

I sleep - a long time - two or three hours perhaps - then a dream - no - a nightmare lays hold on me.

I feel that I am in bed and asleep - I feel it and I know it - and I feel also that somebody is coming close to me,

is looking at me, touching me, is getting on to my bed, kneeling on my chest, itaking my neck between his hands and squeezing it -

squeezing it with all his might in order to strangle me.

I struggle, bound by that terrible powerlessness which paralyzes us in our dreams;
I
try to cry out - but I cannot; I want to move - I cannot; I try, with the most violent efforts and out of breath, to turn over and throw off this being which


is crushing and suffocating me - I cannot!



And then suddenly I wake up, shaken and bathed in perspiration; I light a candle and find that I am alone, and after that crisis, which occurs every night, I at length fall asleep and slumber tranquilly till morning.

lol, how?

my rhyme of diss

or is it my diss of rhymes


is it a crime

to be in my prime

so why are you tossing me grime

all because i dint give you a dime

already told you am principled and firm





damn what a shame

that a nigger has to be so lame

all because of that dame

soon you will say you are being framed

but speak the truth and admit to being tame




your yarns are thrash

and your suggestions blow like ash

because i bike doesn't mean i will crash

i ride with a helmet and a sash

sit there keep hating whilst i make my cash




i am in love and in luck

not because i roll with a nine and a glock

nor because i am still in shock

and i am not even loving like the rest of the flock

she doesn't even stay next block

neither am i that much of a bloke



oh crap and shite

nigger why can't you just take a hike

you and your small assed dyke

i mean take flight

you stepped to me thus into this plight

you know am straight and very right

you asked for this fight

and as soon as i get off my bike

i would throw your ass from this site

better yet from a great height

thus sparing us all your sorry sight






i remain clean and white

Na wa o. I hope you won't kill your self now to make a point,

why ever would i force something

contradictions of life. . . . . . .a little something something i just thought of which had me thinking in depth about the thought

so humor me


life is short

such is life

wishing you a longlife


God is love

love your God


first impressions count

image is noting


live or die

we live so we would die


death is a must

death we all avoid


sex is great

sex is overated


to live is to suffer

there is joy in living(does this mean we all love to suffer?)


health is wealth

money makes up wealth


slow and steady

fast and accurate


you are so green with life

you are so sick and green



danger kills

love to live dangerously


money talks but bullshit works(why can't we bone money and be full of sh@t?)



i love her so

she loves me not





life .huh. . . . . . .what can i say?

never a dull moment

cayon ?

another day

traffic wasnt bad

speed was of essence

pounding across the bridge

me and thousands of others

it was a glorious thrill,another redervouz

with me and tupac on the highway doing 140 on thye freeway

i had this very silly dream

that i saw talking rats

3rats, why would i clown around with rats?

we now had an agreement that i wont kill em

but they had to behave,silly dream i tells ya

reality sucks

so i wake up 5am

again tommorow

so i head out to earn my keep

so i get stuck in lagos traffic

moving across the bridge

so the holdup starts again

so my holiday is over

this really sucks

bluespice. . . . .bullocks

when the blazeman says you owe

it means you owe,shatter that calm exterior even if its for but a moment

sisijinx

talking with you gives me a sense of deja vu

but even that and the fact that you her hiding behind blue's shadow aint gonna help

just jejeli come and pay what you owe. . . . . .

you have the audacity to challenge and try cool your way out of

your punishment you deserve more but


since i am in a good mood i would sentence you to a lifetime of it

then we will see who would run up hills

you see,about my last statement i actually thought

you were her(dont ask me to define her sha )



tgurl

yeah pretty sad

vesc

so its no longer attraction but love now

huh?

aight,ibi lo ma ti bami


tgurl:

i hear you

update on the accident

a heard the two guys in front died

what a waste

******* a minute silence for the departed*******

quick question

your signature

absolutely fab

but is it just

a signature to you?

or are you living the life?

from here i would say you are getting conquered

so ma rev that spirit up and march

i would rather die than have my spirit broken

sush *******thats why i left the army********


look at my signature

a disclaimer by default

which means neither you nor anyone can hold me responsible for what i write lol

bluespice have you seen what you owe me yet?

i need details on when you are paying up asap



cayon

the first time i was ever going to read your write

any of your write was that day

and you left me with this impression of a very very sad young woman

emphasis on very very sad

now you seem to find purchase with (he whos name i wont speak lol)

from what you wrote about the dude, he is got game thus dint take to anyone you offered

in asmuch as i dont know you,i would like to believe from the way you write,which is good by the way

that you are very persecptive and intuitive thus if that dude did have vibes for you,believe me ma

your sonar would have pinged, i dont think its . . .whats that name he called it? ,

i think it more like you are a good idea,a sad confused and pain girl,is the right material to be molded

i dont want to go into religion here.(his being a muslim isnt the problem) . . . .but believe me i question his heritage. . . .

which supports a certin level of submissiveness the free world and even you would frown against hence my ref to the movie

and note people dont change that way. . .it takes grace for a man to maintain an even footing with his woman

that is the average man ooo,not to talk of one whose life his mum would have being entirely submissive to his dad


then the my son loves you. . . .phrase is very disturbing

cant put my finger on what exactly has me spooked but something doesnt ring right about it

i would let you know what it is as soon as it comes to me

which brings me to another thing

you get angry calls to quit nairaland from a no named caller huh?

nairaland can b called many things but isnt that bad as to be warned off it

so do you have to be a rocket scientist to figure who is behind it?

you are being hedged as cow would be

i never did like quiet people ,too much scheming


i might not have answered you ooo

but my advice still stands make a clean break from everyone him especially

your family would come around eventually




note:about the iss with your mum

if honestly there were unbiased peeps around to advice you

non would berate you as much as he did before telling you to apologise

i for one would have suggested you called a meet with your mum and ask why she hates you

that is bound to open the faucet . . . . . . . . . .havent seen any mother that hates her child yet and frankly hope not to encounter any

thus i bet if you speak to your mum about your pain ,your hurt. . . .she might still not undertstand you but she would respect you more

and i can assure you, she would never strike you again

show her you can be your own woman

that you can make your life choices without there imput

but you would want to make it knowing they love you like you love them eitherways

it takes a lot, to do it i know. . . . . .but whats in pride?she is still mummy

lol

you sound so formal

hi merry christmas to you too

meanwhile don't mind me was just goofing around because of joblessness

which brings me to this:


why can't everyday be christmas?

took a drive around town

yesterday,not a single cop on the road

no park, your particulars,how did you get this car questions.

the tension sensed amongst lagosians wasnt there anymore

everyone moved with ease if not a smile

saw a vehicle where the dad,mum and all the kids had santa hats on

my neighbours took pity on me and sent rice upstairs due to my bachelor state(lol)

i dint have to ponder too much on whether to ride somewhere or drive somewhere

everyone seems to be on there best behaviour but me

happyhour is everyhour

which now brings me to the downside

ayo lo payan

2am on my way home from rocking with the boys

ikeja gra and its axis became a mini fresno zone

zigzagging eachother ,downshifting with tires squealing

and the cars performing ultimtely

lets face it how often can one clock 160 on a lagos road when you arent on the bridge?

so here we are having a blast with the cars, my favorite music blaring

commotion up in front on the other lane i saw. . . . . . .people dashing out of their houses i saw

slow down to a crawl i did,indicating to others to do the same

an accident,honda 2003 from what i saw of the car it had somersaulted

help was on ground for them though,so we drove through suffice to say the spirit of ayo left me immediately

i aint going out that way

as a matter of fact i plan to be 75,stubborn and still smacking the ass of my 70something year old wife because i dare

lol. . . . . . . . . . . . ,  . . . . .

cayon

you writeup makes sense

atleast after rereading . . . .

do you mind to rant about what brought this very write to fore within you?

ok

guess i have being missing the real world

yeah told her i loved again today?

by now she should or shouldnt she?

so i was bored went through nairaland proper

no one admires me secretly. . . . .tgurl thanks for that thread

i am more enlightened now. . . . . .

aww 1000plus post not one who felt touched

i must be a wrong chap

or maybe just an non interesting one

either one doesnt please me much

ok. . . .

i am a man

             ******wipes tears*****

who needs admiration anyways

my gateman admires me

my washerwoman admires me

my siblings admire me(i hope sha)

ok so i have run out. . . . .

sue me . . . . . . . . .




yawns

boredom sets in

i have a full tank, money to spend

a free day . . . .lagos beckons

and for the life of me dont know where to go?

isnt that just pathetic?

kay9:
Hmmm. . . . I'm thinking what I think I'm thinking? I mean, if there can be twins, then there can triplets, right?

the exact thought jumped

no actually leaped to mind

if i dint know better. . . . . . . .


just seeing all this today

@#$@%@^&@%!

i have being minding my own business for darn to long

think my new year rez would be to start minding for others again



cayon>. . . . . . . . . . . . .


nice writting

nice diary and now my unsolicited advice now


you sound indeed matured

notice you got tons and tons of patience

which me i lack ooo

but i think you have sorta limited yourself to the box

i.e,folks musa etc. . . . . . .

you need out from all of that

clean break ,what you are going through now isnt healthy

you work?

if yeah move out get your apartment and get you head straight

its your life afterall,you either choose to live it in prision,in the wilds or amongst the open stars

musa. . . . .i dont have anything against him. . . .have you seen this movie . . . . .not without my daughter. . . ?

think again


move out, break comm with everyone . . . .your mom owes you an apology for what she said

because such words can torment a child



thats my advice ooo

you dont have to take it afterall

the only thing i seem to be good at is ranting