₦airaland Forum

argon500:
Bia ne ba, osiso. Your bus is waiting for you.


Enter the bus with your life jacket or you buy at the entrance of the lagoon...lol

LET THE BUS ROLL!
E wole! E wole!! Gbogbo eyin omo ibo alaimore. Awon eja lagoon duro de yin fun jije.

Conductor lock the door.........gbam!

Now, driver tena mo moto.........vroooooooom........vroooooooom.

O di gbere eyin omo ibo alaimore.

Chineke na gboyonku!

JUMP INTO THE LAGOON!

What are you waiting for, jump and somersault into the lagoon all you ungrateful igbos in Lagos and let the fishes have a great feast.

Indeed 'gbogbo wa la leko', but we cannot allow ungrateful 'apaku Ojukwus' to come and destroy Lagos.

Gbogbo eyin omo ibo e bo si lagoon ki awon eja jeyin raurau!

God bless the Oba of Lagos!

This is a thread for outgoing President Goodluck Jonathan. Please do post yours. Below is mine:

ADIEU MR. PRESIDENT: THE GENTLE FISHERMAN!
I have always admired President Jonathan since his tenure as Vice President under the late president Yar'adua. He no doubt presented a humble and gentleman-figure from day one.

When Yar'adua died, I saw him as a natural successor to Yar'adua.

He did not prove me wrong and maybe many others in his first few years, until the man without shoes start derailing with great corrupt practises becoming so glaring under his administration.

Jonathan came, saw, but did not conquer!

He will however be remembered as a man who eventually saved Nigeria and indeed gave Nigeria a new life with his magnanimity in conceding defeat to Gen. Muhammad Buhari even before INEC announced the results of the Presidential Elections.

He therefore lived to the end his well deserved Gentleman title.

May Allah grant him Islam as the icing of his goodness. (Amin Yà Allah).

MAJORITY OF IBOS ARE GREEDY AND UNGRATEFUL!
The Oba of Lagos should be commended for putting the ungrateful Ibos where they belong. I have not seen a group of wicked, greedy and ungrateful group of people.

Indeed is it possible for any ethnic national to enjoy in Ibo land what the Ibos are enjoying in Lagos?

They always complain of being marginalised, yet they dominate a lot in many spheres of economic activity across Nigeria.

El-Rufai as the FCT Minister then confirmed the Ibos has the largest plot of land in the FCT.

Give the Ibos a chance they will want to dominate, yet they will keep complaining of being dominated.

Kudos to the Oba of Lagos, he is indeed a Great Yoruba Leader of our time.

Long live the king!

FOOL HARDY DOKUBO!
Just want your dumb head to know that the creeks will be boiling when go back there and you will be boiled up and busted. A real big foool thou art Dokubo!

menix:
Som1 should confirm if d Co-pilot's name is Abdullahi Mohammed, cous its in their blood..

SHOW YOUR UGLY FACE!
The fact that all you have to offer in your profile pix is your borrowed shoes and wobbly legs it is clear you are a society misfit........Now that the world knows that the co-pilot's name is not what you want it to be, then it is a confirmation that fooolishness and idiocy run supreme in your ignoble blood.

iwaeda:
Olopa ooooo

'Ogbologbo' Number one!.............May Allah have mercy on the Nigerian Police........Obasanjo said it loooong time ago that we have armed robbers in the NPF.........though this one is seriously armed with a deadly, evil brain!

ozoigbondu:
Still loving this woman This woman can make you laugh off your sorrow and she will contuine till 2019 with her husband as president

DO YOU MEAN IT?
If you had been lucky to have a responsible father who is incorruptible like Buhari you would not have love 'that' woman who has lost all the decency in womanhood.

I therefore pity you if this blood sucking woman makes you laugh!

Mogidi:
The broom party are now flying to remote corners of the world to kill, diaris g...


Meanwhile Mugabe should enjoy the fresh air before they send him boko haram.

www.nairaland.com/attachments/2173597_freshair2_gif3bdd7e15574662938a350ae7aec7cb6d

THE FAN CLEARLY SHOWS THE SNAIL SPEED JONATHAN IS MOVING NIGERIA........NOW IT'S TIME FOR CHANGE!

JONATHAN SENT THEM!
Mr. Mugabe please do not be so angry, those witch doctors were sent by our president, they were from Otuoke, our president and his wife do not like old men ruling.

Our president was trying to test those witch doctors on you before turning them on the Old Soldier who is set to take power from him here in Nigeria.

Thank God they have failed in their mission and will not succeed here too. God is in charge.

FANIKAYODE MUST NOT DIE!
Femi Fanikayode must not die! No one should hastily send him back to his grave.

Femi Fanikayode has a lot of jail-life to serve here on earth before he is buried.

Therefore no one should help him escape his deserved punishment here on earth before he crosses to the hereafter to face the Real Punishment.

WHAT A GOOD JOB!
What happened to the prayer warriors in the church? They can only see vision of imminent dangers to their members, but when they are to stand up for the church they go blind!

Now they should rename the church LOSERS' CHAPEL.

Imagine what they have in their account if that sort of money could be lost just like that. A congregation of wicked souls.

The Almighty Allah who created us is indeed the all Merciful One, who has not destined hell for anyone, except those who choose it, hence His invitation to all His Creations to accept Him as the One and only God.

He continuosly guides us through His last testament to mankind, The Glorious Quran which is available to mankind in Arabic as a primary source and translated to many languages in the world.

He has also continue to show us signs, like the one this flower presents us:


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GLs1NoFSkjY

WHICH SHEKAU?
Mr. President, which Shekau are you catching? Is it the one your soldier-man Chris Olukolade told the nation has been killed?

Mr. President stop abusing our intellect. Wake up from your ogogoro induced slumber.

The Nigerian president Dr. Goodluck Jonathan has been quoted by the Nigerian press as saying: "HE UNDERESTIMATED BOKO HARAM THREAT".

This admission has clearly revealed GEJ'S incompetence as a leader.

His underestimating Boko Haram has led to the death and maiming of thousands of Nigerians and displacements of many more thousands Nigerians.

The only option left for Jonathan is to resign NOW or face imminent defeat at the polls come March 28, 2015.

BORN MUSLIMS WITHOUT ISLAMIC KNOWLEDGE!
Those pastors were indeed born Muslims, but they were not guided by their parents to the path of Islam, just like Pastor Tunde Bakare whose mother took to a 'Babalawo' (fetish native doctor) while in the university.

It is therefore not enough to be born into a Muslim, home you need to be guided and as you grow up also search just as this American woman did:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E9rB6LWt7eo

DWJOBScom:
Power and it's problem
I think our military boys needs a lesson on discipline in uniform
It's everywhere in Nigeria - you are the strongest person if you are on uniform or you know anyone on uniform

We will get there

WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?
Uniform na cloth na tailor dey sew am..........go ahead and sew one and be the strongest like SHEKAU!

FORGET ABOUT ANOTHER RALLY!
The APC should forget about staging another rally in Okrika there is no need for it again. The whole world has seen that you organised one that was disrupted. Use the radio station/TV popular in your area to address your people.

Do not give HER another opportunity to SHARE BLOOD. Enough is enough.

TIME TO GET MORE SERIOUS!
By each breath exhaled we are getting nearer to our grave. At the age of 69 Florence Ita Giwa need no one to remind her that time is getting closer for her to return to her Creator.

This is my gift for her:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E9rB6LWt7eo

marcelmessi:
just had my ash.. it reminds us that we will return to dust someday

MEANINGLESS RITUAL!
Just had your ash? So what! Did Jesus participate or teach his disciples this ritual? Where is it in your bible?

What has ash got to do with reminding you that you are from dust? Ash is associated with mourning in the bible.

While visiting the families of the women that lost their lives in the Valentine Day ghastly motor accident, GEJ'S wife madam patience said she will like to question GOD why the accident happened.

In sharp contrast to her 'blasphemy', one of the family members of the women said: "No one can question God".

What a big contrast between wisdom and foolishness!

M4gunners:
Some nairalanders are now behaving like "Ewure" .Who are you to tell INEC Chairman how to do what he knows better than you? He is a prof for God sake. Let him be.

YOU ARE JUST A BALL HEAD!
What do you know?........Nothing, other than seat before the TV and watch EPL. No one is above being advised. A professor does not possess all the knowledge in the world. Reminding him and advising him is quite normal.

You are the real goat(ewure) and it's even an insult to a goat to compare you with one because your intellect is not up to that of a goat.

This is a message to the INEC Chairman, Prof. Atahiru Jega. Please do the following before you proceed to the Senate tomorrow:

*Look for trusted officials that will handle the demonstration of the Card Readers.
*Test the Card Readers to be used and take some back-ups with you.
*Do not let the tested Card Readers depart your presence till you finish the demonstration at the Senate.

May Allah grant you success.

REDEEM YOUR IMAGE!
Instead of calling Obasanjo "Old General" the Nigerian Army under the present leadership should work extra hard to redeem its seriously battered image. The Nigerian Army has never been so dishonoured in its history of existence.

GEJ has urinated and shiiit on the Army, Nigeria cannot afford to go on under this 'dadandidi' commander-in-chief of the Armed Forces.

DETAINED FOR SPECIAL DUTY!
My third eye informs me that Mbu is rounding these Policemen up for the purpose of being used to favour PDP on election days.

I once met a Policeman at a supermarket who informed me while commending the Police authority on the way he was neatly dressed, that he purchased his uniform with his own money, Mbu will therefore be his known wicked self to be arresting those Policemen.

He is arresting them for special purposes. Why didn't he arrest Policemen in Potrharcourt and Abuja while in charge there?

*Mr. President why are you now comfortable with Femi Fanikayode who called the PDP a sinking ship and even used more derogatory words on your person. Sir are you suffering from memory loss or filth is your beloved perfume?

*Sir, why did you chose to dress like a magician, when you visited Bayelsa for your presidential campaigns.

*Mr. President you cannot deny that Captain Sagir has rubbished your stand on "one man one vote" after releasing the 'Ekiti Audio recordings'. He has exposed you as an undemocratic president. What do you say?

*Sir, is it true that you always drink yourself to stupor to the extent of not being able to attend to foreign /local visitors at Aso Villa?

*Mr. President you have travelled wide, please why can't you see the great difference in our malnourished Policemen and the robust and lanky London Police. Sir, why are you sucking the blood of our Policemen?

Sir, why is it that when PHCN provides electricity, most of the Time the power supplied cannot even make fans rotate, not to talk of Airconditioners?

naijaking1:
How come WAEC itself doesn't have a copy of Buhar's certificate

STUPID IDEEOT!
Which WAEC are you talking of, can you read between the lines on what General Akinrinade is saying.

If you can ask your lazy brain: WHERE DID THE ARMY GET WHAT THEY RECORDED 50 years ago IN BUHARI FILE. You are just a big fooool!

SHUT UP SIR!
Senator Obanikoro, (Oba awon kokoro) should shut up his mouth and stop denying the audio recording. This man has no credibility. He told Nigerians that the primary that produced Jimi Agbaje was flawed, now that he has been settled with ministerial post he said Jimi Agbaje is the best candidate for PDP. Obanikoro is a big shame!

.
.

.
.
. Jonathan met with the Queen of
England.
He asked her:
JONATHAN: How do you run such an efficient
government? Are there any tips u can give to me?
I want to help Nigeria.
"Well," said the Queen, "the most important thing
is to surround yourself with intelligent people."
Jonathan frowned, and then asked,"But how do i
know the people around me are really intelligent?"
The Queen replied, "Oh, that's easy, you just ask
them to answer an intelligent riddle.
The Queen pushed a button on her intercom.
"Please send David Cameron in here, would you?"
David Cameron walked into the room and
said,"Yes, your majesty?"
The Queen smiled and said,"Answer this riddle.
David, your mother and father have a child, it is
not your brother and it is not your sister. Who is
it? "Without pausing for a minute David Cameron
answered,"that would be me." Yes, very good,"said
the Queen.
Jonathan went back home to ask his Vice
President Sambo
JONATHAN: Answer this. Your mother and your
father have a child, it's not your brother and it's
not your sister, who is it?
SAMBO:."I'm not sure, let me get back to you."
He asked all his staff in the Office but none could
give him an answer. Finally, one day, VP Sambo
ran into Januzaj.
Sambo asked, Januzaj
SAMBO: Your mother and father have a child and
it's not your brother or sister,who is it?"
Januzaj answered sharply, "That's easy, its me!"
Sambo smiled,and said "Thanks!"
Then he went back to speak with President
Jonathan.
Sambo: Sir, I have the answer to that riddle, It's
JANUZAJ
Jonathan got angry,he said to Sambo. "No wonder
Nigeria isn't moving forward, I am Surrounded by
Dummies.! The answer is David Cameron!"

whizpet:
Jonathan should know that Nigerians are sick and tired of his Government. Only God saves him from being bomb 2dai #VoteBuhari come february 14.

YOU ARE ON YOUR OWN

You are not serving the interest of GBM with this sort of post.

The Niger Delta militants are likely behind this false flag. I want to believe that if it were APC the biomb could could've exploded at the right time, even at that no one can say it's APC until investigation is concluded.