₦airaland Forum

Everester:
well naturally, I don't get excited or impressed with ladies,but since I met her,things changed,

u are right about that prayer part, but praying about a lady that's still rejecting me is somehow awkward,

though this is what my mother too is saying(prayer first),cos she has never see me like this,she see that I really love this girl,
but if I were to follow this prayer first, assuming the prophecy support it, and she doesn't agree, how long would I do that for,how many girls will I follow this trend for

My brother.. Have been in similar shoes.. Presently in similar shoes..

If your a child of God.. GOD God dwells in you.. If your waiting for God to say everst my son, xyzis your wife you would grow old.. God does at times.. He doesn't at times.. But the constant way is bearing witness with your spirit..

What i mean is God directs us through our spirit (the spirit of man is the candle of the Lord) amd if you feel this way about her.. I believe its your spirit man, which is born of God directing you.

I wish you all the best in your pursuit.. I asked a similar question like yours weeks ago.. For me ill ignore her.. For now and see how it goes

AlphaLover:
So because urgent 2k girls tell you that you look younger than your age you believe them?

Grow up

Urgent 2k girls.. Whats that? I don't speak that language... We're not the same.. Go meet your kind.

milann:
this means age is nothing but a number. People don't grow according their age anymore

A very deep and sensible way of putting it.. Because man isn't the physical body.. Man, the real man is subtle something that can be discribed.. His physical body takes shape according to the nature of his spirit or inner man..

A man is only as old as "he thinks he is"... Thats why you find, the jay z, nas, p Diddy all looking young even when their 50 and above

AlphaLover:
I think she is closer to 40 maybe 38 at least

My elder sis who is a mum of 3 kids and works still looks younger than this so no this lady is probably 38 if not 40

She May be lying
But you're analysis makes no sense..

I look 10 years younger than my age..Especially when i shave and rest well.. Diff people have different genes etc..a lot of younger peopler look older than me..

Hmm

StacyO:
Please read through.

I'm actually in my early twenties, not that I'm too old for marriage anyway. One of my top clients who I'm trying to polish out a business with, went ahead to arrange a mini impromptu by fire by force relationship for me and his brother.

Like bethrothing someone to someone else without their full consent.

It was a men's arrangement cause, I was surprised how they all came to that agreement.

I tried breaking up with him the first time and he told his brothers about it. Guilt almost finished me cause, I was blamed for the excuse I brought up. His uncle who is in charge of the contract brought us back together again.

The main issue now is that I want to break up with the guy once and for all but, I don't want to hurt him and I still have to save the contract at hand.

The guy is very much attached to me already and I won't fake it, I'm equally beginning to feel butterflies in my stomach.

I want to go about it in a very simple way. So that at the end, we all go our separate ways happy.

Any idea is highly welcomed. Serious and mature minds please.

Thank you.


Modified:: I told him my own part of the story and my reasons of not wanting to be in a relationship with him.
I'm not ready for any relationship now and I dont like him. Most importantly, I dont want to chop his money while deceiving him.

He is still not accepting reality but, I'm sure with time, he'll move on.

PS: His uncle isn't aware of this yet and I begged him not to tell anyone.

Correct me if am wrong...

These butterflies in the tummy.. Isnt that what wr all want?.. If their butterflies in your tummy.. What else is the issue?.. Please am confused.. Butterflies means great vibes.. Abi not?

Manq:
It's not bad Belle but HOOOOOWW come?

Its a valid question..

HellVictorinho:
Okay.
I want to do online Maths lessons.
Can you get a student for me?

This help whey you need, funny o.. Anyways its a legitimate desire..

I do business online etc.. But to acquire students.. Hmm, its not my line

You know what your offering, and should know how to offer PARENTS.. That will entice them to want to pay for your tutoring.. Most students won't register with you, target parents..

That being said.. This is a wonderful idea, but for Nigeria i have doubts about this idea.. Due to poor power supply...i may be wrong

But then if you target high brow areas, lekkis etc you should sell well..

What you need most importantly now is
Website
Knowledge of internet marketing

HellVictorinho:
.
Can you help me?
I'll be grateful.

What can you offer...

When asking for helping hand from people.. Don't come empty.. It makes it easier for the person to help.. So what can you do?

ShackWes:
Abegi

We don't want this otu, Braitwaithe sef has more goals than this flop

Otu..

Remember he's a human like you
Remember hes some ones son, darling, husband etc..

Flop you call him, but all the money hes made it will take generations upon generations from you to acquire, if ever they will.. Nonsense

Truvel:
Ur Chance Of Getting Her Is Very Slim. Dat A Girl Gave U Her Number Doesn't Always Mean Dat She Has Interest In U. If Not 4 Anything Atleast 4 D Sake Of Her Work In D Church Free Her, Make She No Go Backslide because Of U.

Am talking of some one i I'd marry your talking of back sliding.. How old are you again?

Truvel:
Op, Free D Lady. Na because Of U She No Won Come Church Again.

Lol, i doubt this..

Wanted to free her.. I asked two guys opinion, they said chase her cos she wants to prove you really want her.. This made sense to some extent as ive lost girls in the past to not having power to be chasing anybodys fada... One of them boys also said he lost a potential wife to not putting up a chase...

At the end of the day, il free and ignore her and see how it goes.. Talk is cheap, but eyes don't lie.. And her eyes i believe say something else.. But ill free her and update this thread in time to come

lagusboyyy:
Being cute does not necessarilly mean a lady will fall for you,its just an added advantage.

Last time i checked,not too cute guys date and marry the most beautiful women most.

Ol boy na wha ooo

This marry wahala de tire me

Michelle55:
If the university of that aunty is unattainable.. Try other girls university.. Don't lose yourself while chasing a woman, if it's meant to be there won't be too much stress and mental breakdown attached to it. Give it a rest bro.

Thanks well noted and appreciated

punisha:
more reason u should up your game.

if she told u to call again she'd answer it means , ur on her waiting list and could join probation soon.

God is working wonder for u, hallelujah.

Not doing bad at all my self.. Though am not flashy

VanillaIyce:
The thing is she doesn't like you or let me say she doesn't want to be in a relationship with you, and for the giving out of number..that one is to avoid long talk of why don't you want to give me your number, last last you might get a block..so just leave her and save your emotions for the one that will reciprocate.

Appreciate your reply and opinion, thanks

HopeVictor:
Just ask for her account details but don't send her anything..she will now be the one calling you...

she's a banker.. Has a car.. I doubt she needs money

pozehnani:
See now you don't pursue usher commot for Church

Lol, not true..

Am quite cute though

Ladies have a question to ask.. A need clarity

I meet this lady in church.. Been seeing her always as shes an usher..

I decided to approach her.. . To my surprise she was quite cute from close distance (she wears those chromogrohic or something glasses, gets dark etc) so from distance you cant really seeher face from far..

Approached her.. We spoke, i really liked her.. Collected her number, conversation seemed to go well, i thought she liked me too from the way conversations went.

I messaged her during the week,(monday of first Sunday) she didn't response, she comes to church every Sunday.. Prior to talking to her, since she didn't respond to my WhatsApp.. I thought id ask her about that in person in church (the next week) she didn't show up.. Was really hoping to see her.. Called her the following week she picked and said she didn't come to church cos she was ill, said shed call me back.. Never called back.. Came to church last Sunday.. I asked her about her health and why she didn't reply messages said shes been busy.. But that i should call again, shed respond.. This Sunday was hoping to see her.. She didn't show, so i called her.. She said she went to another church, so shed call me later.. Till now no call..

I thought this lady liked me oo..
Ladies please interpret this attitude.. Cos i also really like this girl, but am not ready to be chasing etc.. Or she doesn't like me and i should not waste my time.. Abeg opinions..

Does she want me to chase her? Because shes not consistent in church like before.. Seeing i really dig her..

Or am just fooling myself

tempest01:
Na you're broke type person go make claims online, you go dey kiss ass, if crumbs go fall for you.

Lol, how will he even see what i wrote..

Me broke, lol.

Your the one that has shown how frustrated /broke you are.. Smoke like truth cant be hidden..

Your English even gives you away.. I no go follow you enter your frustrated state.. Na to sorry for you

tempest01:
See your mouth like 22 mil.

When you have no ability to immigrate like others you end up talking down on them.
Leave people that want to travel out to do so. If Nigeria is paying you that much, why are you so concerned about what the immigrant is earning?
Is it a dck measuring contest?
I even thought i will see a sensible thread.

Why the frustration are you that broke that you insult the guy for no reason?

Omo nobe soo..

Like some one said even Dangote de fine money.. Carry your frustration ginger yaself or put am for ya pocket

SmartPolician:
Read my previous comments

Oga, rent is not fixed anywhere in the world.

Your not making a point, either talking from experience.. You're just writing..

I don't stay in the us.. But i ve heard the a us residents say ghana is cheap to rent house compared with us.. Mind you in ghana most decent housing comes in us dollars...

I also watch real estate shows on dstv.. And the cost of housing yes its varies but its not near cheap.. You don't know read snd learn

Ademola47:
Recently, I noticed the number of angry Nigerians has increased.

From the saying "an hungry man is an angry man" we can say a poor man angry nature is understandable to an extent. What about the rich ones? The people in the middle and upper class? How do we explain their cause of angriness?
Fine, it's human thing to be sad or unhappy once in a while but how do we explain being angry unnecessary every time.

Everyone seems to be angry over little things that can be overlooked. You will mistakenly match them slightly and they'll want to fight you. You will ask a polite question and aggressive mode will be activated.

My most recent experience was yesterday morning when I went to the bank to get some money.
I took a bike which costs #50 normally. I gave the bike man #100 and he started shouting that I should have told him I didn't have change. Haha! #100 to collect #50 change. I forfeited the change. Own getting inside the bank, I saw 3 standing adjacently on the queue. I asked one of them "Please Sir, are you the last person on the queue" since it was hard to know whom I was behind. "You no get eyes. You no see say na my behind you dey".
When I left the bank, I wanted to buy sports newspaper. I told the vendor to give me Complete sports since he didn't display any sports newspaper and he replied angrily " I no get joor. If you no wan buy these ones make you comot for here".

Recalling the series of event, I find it hard to fathom the reason behind everyone's lingering angry mood.

My brother.. Am sure you grew up outside Nigeria.. , id be shocked if you grew locally..

If you stay too long this thing or whatever it is will enter you too..assuming you don't stay here.. And if you grew up in niaja and are able to see this anger, and separate yourself, kudos to you.. But run because you'd soon be the same

festacman:
Leave judgment to God who alone sees the heart. Look if you study the lives of prophets of the old, you would put this same judgement on them.

There's nothing wrong with discerning the spirit behind a man.. Jesus said by their fruits we know them..

I mean a pure igbo man when he speaks English you would hear the igbo intonation.. So will you hear a French mans intonation etc.. These things cant be hidden.. Wer all controlled by what we carry inside.. A Mango tree cant bear pawpaw fruits.. Its contrary to nature.. So a man must out of his core or heart speak, act etc.. That man carries too much bile inside of him. Gods number one rule is Love.. And he doesn't send you if you're a prophet or pauper.. Abide by the rule or get sentenced.. The law is blind to persons enode look face

Tinubu
Tinubu
Tinubu

Is this why you have been tackling uber, opay etc hmm

You can't take this money to heaven o

You will still give account to God,.. Lets all remember

UTILITYMAY:
So do you think what Pastor Tunde Bakare did was right?

Don't mind him..

The way the man bakare talks.. Snd with this act.. I doubt if the spirit operating in him is of God..

Gullible Christians think its by the big big Grammer a preacher speaks

festacman:
A beautiful sight to behold.

Looking at Bishop Oyedepo just reminded me of a story Pastor Tunde Bakare once told about their encounter. Bakare disagreed with the content of one of Oyedepo's numerous books and tore it live on national TV during his program. Later, he ran into Oyedepo at an airport who confronted him for daring to shred his book on TV. Bakare looked him in the eyes and told him pointedly that he tore his own book he bought with his own money and not Oyedepo's book. Oyedepo was speechless for a moment and then moved on without saying anything further. Lawyers don't disappoint even when they are pastors.

That man maybe a lawyer.. But his calling am not sure where he got it from..

If he has the spirit of God.. He cant do that.. Also his basket mouth gives him away.. . There's another spirit operating in the man.. Its not of God.. But his actions are pleasing to you and men.. And what pleases God is opposite of what pleases man.

9jaRealist:
Folks like you are the reason people like her “you no dey understand English?”

The simple illustration about the blender is that she wanted to buy one that lasts longer (that’s actually the “quality” she seemed to be referring to) rather than a cheaper that would breakdown quickly (and she even gave an example of precisely that happening), which makes all kinds of good common sense - at least to rational people (which by definition would exclude a lot of “penny-wise-pound-foolish” Nigerians). Similarly, with the car, she was saying if they used the import guy connection, he could get a better car for cheaper than he paid for his current car. Not sure why anyone would think that’s not a good thing for a girlfriend to suggest - and yet if we all had a penny for every time a dude suggested where his girlfriend or wife should buy a guy, or a generator or some other equipment, we would all probably be billionaires.

Meanwhile, funny that you think her litany is “inconsequential” (and I am pretty sure that she was writing in a ‘stream of consciousness’ since it was a hurried response, unlike the dude who obviously sat down to compose his whine), but yet it was the dude who was complaining about where they bought water or drinks, which restaurants or lounges they would go to, and whether she preferred to shop at malls than the market.

Conversely, I agree with you that if someone is offended by one’s words and verbalizes it, the least the speaker should do is try hard to refrain from repeating same. However, curiously your counsel only goes ONE WAY. Instead you casually wave off her litany of complaints variously “inconsequential” and “petty”. In fact, you nary utter a single word about her complaints of being insulted and denigrated. But then again, I do not really blame most Nigerian men for this sort of mental blindness. They have been raised and immersed in a largely partrimonial, sexist and even misogynistic culture that it has become inherently ingrained and normalized in their skewered worldview. Accordingly, stripped of all intellectual pretensions, your advice basically boils down to: make yourself smaller, suppress your views and voice, and supplicate to the man.

Frankly, the sole useful counsel she should take from both your comments is that they both should move on.
>

You quoted me to write this long episode.. That i don't understand English.. You and the babe are at the same mental level.. You love someone and the quality of blender is what is itching you.. You're building a house, and the quality of blender is your issue?..

Omo men no get time... I need a car asap, and i can afford it, time exceeds money.. Yes id rather buy from Yankee.. But evidently these people have money and penny pinching wont hit them hard.. Because they can always buy a car later.. Women are generally petty.. But the worse part is its coming froma fellow man as you,.. Trash.. Scientists say women have smaller brains.. You seem to have similar with women.. Another thing is the money ratio is 60 t0 40 (this was after wahala started, and she claimed not to have used him as a toaster).. Then the money i spent on my car is what is giving you heat
. Omo get off my mentions abeg or come with something correct

Seniorwriter:
Ladies are one complex creation...they hardly know what they want early in life.
When they are young only flirting is what they want forgetting that they age faster!.
Anyways if you are a lady try prioritize your desires.
BTW become financially independent with humility it's key to having the right people around you.
Do you know that you don't need to be tech savvy to earn from Tech....
One of the ways is using your smart phone to earn daily,weekly or monthly.
@OP when will you monetize your phrase(FUTURE IS FEMALE)?!
Deep Quote
Do things for Future reasons and not for the Rave of the moment.

Proactivity Leads To Productivity!!!
@Seniorwriter

You made a solid point.. Its seems they ladies don't have capacity to think far...

I met a lady.. I see a wife in her.. And i think she digs me too.. After exchange of numbers.. Shes started acting strange.. Wanting me to chase her.. I mean wer adults.. Why should we playing childish games,men dont age as fast.. And me i look 10 years younger than my age.. . Why all the bullshit.. Some cant give birth on time..
Empty wombs make it easier for fibroid to grow.
Shes the one that will give birth..
. Severally, Why not start on time?etc.. . All these things bafffle me, like why don't this gender think, i mean you like me already.. Omo their brains are really small

Iamafinegirl:
Did you tell them that when we are talking
“You are not serious is a big INSULT for you”
Did u tell then that when u say I like trump and I say “me I hater trump because of this and that” it is already an offense and you admitted to you having issues with me airing opinions because you are boss or what I don’t know?
Did you tell them a simple conversation or difference in opinion even on a gist is an insult to you?

Did you tell them I think of quality and wen a frying pan was needed I was saying the new expensive ones sef are not good, they burn. Second new is better in this case and we got a second new one? Because it’s not necessarily about cost but most times you won’t even be able to understand the depth of what I suggest sometimes.

Did you tell them I explained something one day that I paid money to so and so person to avoid a problem and you tried to give me another solution to have taken and I was like “me I don’t want wahala oo thats why I did what I did@ and because everything is fight and arguement for you you had stood up stormed out of the house because you felt i said I don’t want your wahala etc when all I was saying is that I didn’t want wahala if d issue boomeranged and so I didn’t even look for other means I just did d surest method in question” did u settle down to listen or because you never patient and always ready to call everything an argument or fight you had kickstarted your nature?

Did you tell them you wanted a car and I said this car is too expensive tell someone who we know imports to bring for you although the person could delay and may change the car you agreed on but I said do a written agreement with him so it would be cheaper for you and that way he won’t do anything funny ? And you would spend less and get a better grade or level like the one I got instead of paying for something lower at the same price as the one you paid for in town. Out of love, did you not turn it to fight and say I am wicked, and louded the issue and dramatised it as being evil.
Did you tell them you lied to me that you don’t drink or smoke?
But you drink and lied from foundation of a relationship to win a girl?
When I realised out of anger I said you lied to me you don’t drink but you are a drunkard.
Did your remember saying my father who doesn’t drink at all and you know fully is the drunkard
You have called me demonic woman
You have called me stupid woman
You have called me very stupid woman
The list is endless but if we discussing and you don’t understand what I am saying and I am frustrated talking and I say “you no dey understand English” you just flare up that that is a big insult.
Things that aren’t insults you made them insults to defend yourself.
Did you tell them the most times we went to Shoprite then I use to be the one buying things...and you usually pick nothing. So why should Shoprite be so expensive if I buy water “nestle water” and other things from there even before we ever dated and you used to follow me there to win me and I never asked you to pay for me or use you as a toaster?

Did you tell them that you are building and I am also building? And the months you spent all your salary not even on the building alone oo. Busy dashing people and at 3rd of the month you were broke and I was like how would we handle the house you said I am there and I held those months because that’s what a good woman would do.

Did you tell dem that wen you arrived at the counsellor we told them we had a 60k and 40k rule as at then but we just weren’t piling it in the same account and the pastor said ok we should do it as a joint account so no one would feel he is bringing all the money” and we stop spending differently. you told them it’s the pastor who proposed it or he told us that ok you people should just put the money in a seperate account and the wife asked what else is making you angry and you said contributions for repair should be added”.

Did you tell them that when your drivers license expired and there was a delay with joint account , you said you would keep some part of the contribution for where you stay but I must submit all my own contribution to your younger sisters account while you submit just some to her because you don’t trust me with money. The younger sister would now be the one dishing out the feeding money to me who is the one working? While you comfortably keep part of your contribution as a boss. Did you tell them I said you should give her all if i would also have to submit my own all to her since she is the chosen financial manager of our own institution so she can be dishing out money to both of us as at when due since distance is not a barrier to bank transfer so I would also monitor u because you don’t trust me with money and you want to monitor what I am eating when u aren’t even there with me.

Did you tell them you don’t live according to your means and you always borrowing and financing a lifestyle heavier than you inclusive of feeding (because you eat 70-80%) of all the food in the house? Did you tell them you have collected above 14 million naira loan and you haven’t completed any house you are building aside still having normal money people have used to complete their own houses.

Did you tell them you give them babes money and say send me your account number Cus I have seen it but to buy Apple extra for me out of a budget as per my love this one na for u from my pocket? Did you tell then as we came back from your location you had meeting with your babe asking if hostel has resumed and all by 6pm same day?

Did u tell them that I had been using clin-cap face cream, benzoxide peroxide face cream, and you have been using it with me and I have never said this cream is 2000 and the other is 1000 let’s contribute from budget but you bought olaybact for me 400 naira and you were balancing account for me?

Did you tell them I did a soap mix of 13000 naira to 15,000 naira and you have been lovingly using it With me since January and I have never in my life said your contribution for soap but you won’t even do it, if you did sef you would have been asking for money by now.

Did you tell them that even to buy apple while taking me to were you lived loveingly as per this is my new location has to be from the budget and that you couldn’t say babes aside this budget this for you?
Did you tell them I also contributed for the fuel as you were taking me lovingly to your new location? Location you dey go dey come yourself but as I go follow u go know d place I must pay for transport. I for kukuma just enter public transport. But I don’t even have a problem with that since that’s what he wanted. We just accounted for my path

Did you tell them...that I am not wasteful and you went ahead to do things you wanted to do and started blaming me for it. Like buying a new tv when your mum was around for them...knowing fully well I hardly look at a television and you did it for you and yours?
Did you tell them this girl who doesn’t contribute lovingly gives your sis money and also give your mum at least in the best way I can afford within my means but you no send me message so that’s my business you are not even seeing it. Na me send myself?
When last did you buy me a gift in a year and half? It was a wig when you were still trying to toast me. That was only when you were trying to win my heart.
Did you tell them you don’t do anything for me I don’t ask you for money for cloth, hair etc or my own fuel as I am a responsible adult and not a burden on a man which you know yourself. Did you let them know that the food you eat 70% of and the house repair you would do definitely if I am there or not is what you would always come and stand on my head for when we weren’t yet contributing in a joint account. Did you tell them you don’t take care of me and you are just so self centered about the feeding part because you eat more of the food? Yet I was still buying food oo no be say I go out and don’t bring anything to the house. I still buy meat, tomatoes, onion etc but maybe not just up to the person who consumes the 80%

Did u tell them d day you took me out and water was bought which was like two years ago was a special day I think maybe Valentine or my birthday or something and “I was only asking to be treated special”. As per today na correct day, spoil me na.
Did you tell them that I spoke of u buying some thing like blender or electronic because you need quality one to last. The cheap juicer bought did it last? No
Was there not finally a decision where the expensive “binatone” blender was picked because for some things, quality is important so it lasts?
Did you tell them I met condoms in your other room and you alleged it’s your boss that came to your house to use it? Because you couldn’t tell him no?
Did you tell them that if I want to do something you would use my car and if you want to do something you would use my car and I said love should cover all this there should be no differentiating of car for activities and you can use mine when you want and viceversal?

The day he said I said drug was too expensive did he tell you he spent all his income that month already by 3rd or so due to poor planning and I used my income all for the month for food. Ofcourse I am sure he borrowed as usual for fuel for his car that month and maybe some extra things like suya etc you may want to eat and that’s why I couldn’t afford to buy that cream or is it even tablet I desperately needed quality type of drug to treat that ailment because it use to be stubborn when it comes but couldn’t afford it that month ?

In addition I forgot. The generator I would tell you to put on when wet had a generator house while some or most Nigerians just make a metal cover or so for their generator. So rain fell and the splash I could look wasn’t much and I would say it’s not like water entered this thing in its house like Dt just few splash on surface. I owned a generator I ran without it having issue before meeting you and while you where toasting me. I didn’t know I am unqualified to run a gen. I stopped touching your gen because it was complain upon complain or I am arguing with you by having a different opinion about ah it’s small splashes. Ofcourse if a gen was drenched would I with my full senses say lets put it on? When Nigerians keep their gen outside with normal cover.

You would go out and meet the true definition of a Nigerian woman. Take care of her is what a man does, send her money for hair, dress, clothes etc.
And still buy food n do stuff.
You would remember I was never a burden on u
I hope you would have love enough for her to cover taking care of her abi u would start complaining and shouting on her too. I just hope you don’t faint then.

On the other hand I Wld meet the true definition of Nigerian man who knows he is to care. Simple

Wow

Sister.. Sincerely i was tired of reading.

But please learn.. If a human being man or woman boy or girl say "you arr not serious is an insult".. Please respect their wishes, you didn't grow up together and every ones back ground and growing up is different, stop forcing what you think is right on another.. Besides that, if you love some one, how hard is it to not use certain words that make them uncomfortable? Simply you don't love this guy.. Hes sensitive to the way you talk and your attitude to that is take it like that.. Which is wrong,


There tooo many did you tell them etc.. You're storing up too many things to come fight this guy.. And sincerely a lot of things you wrote are in consequential.. I didn't finish reading please.. Ill read and edit if necessary..

Long story short, you don't love the guy, you guys should go your separate ways..

Edited and read to the end..
He bought car same price for what he could have gotten from America, i want quality blender etc, bla bla bla.. The guy isn't perfect.. But you're petty and self centered sister. End of discussion

Much ado about nothing..

Nigerian youths are directionless..