₦airaland Forum

DaPhoenix:
She is asking for advice because she like many people need a push before they do what they know is right. She never verbally abused him until he hit her and if she did, he should have VERBALLY abused her back if that will help. All she said was, darling you might want to consider taking a bath and out of nowhere, he rains slaps on her.

The only right I see here is something that is being delayed:  Finding a way to put an end to the currently ongoing silence that pervades their relationship.
I am not sold on that speculation that she said "darling, you might want to consider a bath".   Bullshit. This woman is not a deranged being.  She would not have married this man if he was a monster.  This is the same man that vowed never to lay his finger on a woman.  She must have done or said something absolutely disastrous.

Oyinda, maybe she deserted her family when she chose to marry him.

Women will never be totally satisfied with egalitarianism. They are far too used to the idea of men taking control. That's why they have these expectations of men treating them like royal queens.

DaPhoenix:
She was surviving before she got married to him right? Unless he learns to be an adult, acknowledge and apologize for his wrongdoing, she will raise her child in a home where the child wouldn't witness his/her mother being used as a punching bag all in the name to distill respect.

LOL.  If it was that easy why is she here seeking your advice?   This is not just "another" relationship.  This is a marriage, so approach it as one.  For better or worse means just that.  Granted abuse is wrong.  Unless you are telling the man to surrender his manhood and be used as a verbal punching bag.

Even if I support HER
I think telling this mother-to-be to leave is a horrible idea.  Look, she's even complaining that this man is not giving her money for food.  That speaks volumes about the kind of relationship they have been brewing.  I don't know if it's completely patriarchal, but this lady seems heavily dependent on this man.  
Why would you honorable mentions here advise her to break up her home and abandon her source of survival?  Where would she run to?

[quote author=~Sauron~ link=topic=254174.msg3653820#msg3653820 date=1238199264]I wish it was that simple.
There's no way on God's green earth she told him politely and the husband slapped her. . . . .
We are not being told the full story. . . . . .The hubby isn't an animal.[/quote]Yeah, no kidding.  I'm sure she has told him to shower a few times in their relationship, prior to that incident occuring.
She must have chosen to try a different approach when it landed her two hot slaps and a relationship against the ropes.

It's true now. Abi oo, I wasn't the only kid in the neighborhood that went looking around for dry mango shells to break open. If you were lucky you would find at least two of those black singing kokoros. You encase them in your pali ishana, you shake it and the kokoro begins making tat noise.

Just don't give in. Chicks want what they can't have.

Mango I stopped eating that thing when tha black singing kokoro started coming out of it.

Are these men on the grounds that they simply agree with you?  You would be lying to pretend that everything the rest of us (namely Sauron, Cristalz, luvinhubby, etc) have said hold no merit.

Hope say bobo no take you chop and clean mouth o. white girls dey gullible sha. ewo ooo.

OMG! I hate to poop your love tin tin party, but your story no quite mesh in my ears.

Good to hear that it will be returned soon.

factbox:
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onDGrind is 100 per cent right, apologise to each other, also your manner of approach was not diplomatic enough because you even confirmed that you abused him but remember no matter what, he is still ur husband even though it is not easy to apologise to anybody because everybody have got pride but i think you need to go ahead and make up because you trigger the slap being given toyou .mind you i dont support wife battering but pastor desmond tutu and even pope benedict 16 can react just that way when highly provoked to establish and save their manhood. u know we ladies always desire very cool guys that will usually smile at our misconduct so that we can take their positions stylishly.all the same pray and fast then changeyour attitudes and hope for the best ce finni.finally you should check your level of anger since no matter what happened it has still not warrant you contemplating abortion i guessyou are not a good lady with morals also your actions shows that you are very selfish not minding the fate of the unborn child.if you dont know where you are going others will leadyou to where they are going so baby girl be warned. grrrrrrrrrrrhhhhhhhhhhh.

likes this

spikedcylinder:
As I said before, thats a whole other argument, one that has been going on for ages and no conclusion has been reached. People tend to go along with their conscience when it comes to things like these.

Not saying I don't understand where you are coming from. I do think it would be quite maniacal to kill a voiceless human being because I'm upset at a lover.

spikedcylinder:
As opposed to growing a zygote and making it unwanted but its father?

Lol. Life begins at fertilization.

big husband lol

big car

big stone

When will you finally re-convert to christianity?

ibkaye:
You people saying it was just a 'simple' slap and that should just endure it, you want him to kill her before she finally leaves? You think these 'simple' slaps will just stop like that? I'm sure the next blow will carry even more weight sef.

Don't you think the husband can become suicidal from the daily dosage(s) of verbale abuse?

Look at how bad he's taking it.  It's been three days and still no word.

[quote author=~Sauron~ link=topic=254174.msg3653207#msg3653207 date=1238186365]Wifey got slapped. . . . . .Her husband is depraved. . . A criminal. . . .He should be locked up.
Wifey wants to kill a child(Abortion). . . . .She's a saint. . . .She's Mother Theresa. . . . .She's innocent.
It goes to show how sexual equality is screwing the world over.[/quote]Couldn't have said it any better.

luvinhubby:
For considering evacuation as a punitive option for a simple slap, she needs to see a shrink. What has the innocent baby got to do with mum being slapped

Thank you.  she doesn't know where or how to project her own fear.  She's upset at her husband but plans to take it  out on the innocent baby.  Makes no ounce of sense.

Do you want your wife to come to bed with a stank pussy?
Won't you tell her to take a bath?

It's his decision to lost his baby and possibly make his wife infertile for the rest of her life.

We are looking at it from different mirrors I see.

If you want to stick to the idea that the woman's action is a-okay, please do try to emulate her mannerism in your future marriage.  I can only pray that it doesn't land you three dirty slaps.

Well, ebony, it looked like they were all in there talking and smiling in the video while the child was being helplessly tortured.  you ask what kind of woman would subject her child to that type of menacing abuse, right? still, it doesn't look like she's fighting to rescue the baby from that horrid sight.  she was pacing back and forth, all at the same time talking calmly.  Same with the men in the background.  Point is, even though they may think their action was not harmful or nothing to be concerned about, look who gets hurt in the end. . . the child.

LadyT:
Just stop it now your just embrassing yourself.  This is shit talk on another level.

Abeg say something meaningful o jare.  Don't stick to gender pity, it gets old after some time.

He's killing the baby himself.
A depressed mother can cause harm to the baby, leading to miscarriage.

It wasn't the man's decision to vac the baby from her womb. That's a choice she will have to live with for the rest of her life.

Stop being defensive idiots, no one said the video served as a form of entertainment.  Abuse is abuse.  It just so happens that it comes in different shapes, sizes, you name it.  That's the point.  Don't justify one while exonerating the other.  Both parties should be held responsible.

Stop playing the gender card, ebony.  I see the legs of a woman in that video.  The responsibility does not fall solely on the man's shoulders.
Mind you, when something/someone is being abused, never overlook it.