₦airaland Forum

Tease her. Try dropping hints and see if she picks up on them. If you boldly break the news to her you might ruin the friendship you have.

SeanT21:
Its call Love.There is nothing wrong with calling and texting each other 40 times a day.They cant get much of each other.

No dear, it's called smothering. Puppy love will lead you down the road to ruin in a hurry.

I think the best way to avoid being left for dead is to mirror the type of attention your partner gives you.  You might be unhappy for the time being, but as you get to know one another you can open up more and express yourself.

I don't like your idea of risking it all and putting all your eggs in one basket.  You get badly hurt and damaged that way.  Sure you can learn from it after you move on, but the pain you endure/experience during that heartbreak is not a good feeling.  Why put yourself through that when it could be avoided  . To avoid disappointment don't expect anything from anyone.

My dear, love is a two-way street. Give and take. Don't keep giving to someone who's only taking and not giving back.

LOL

@topik
Actions do speak louder than words

bluespice:
exactly my point
u act without balls some women have domineering tendencies they see u acting like a wuss
they take over n show u how its done
its no fault of thiers
u wanna be in control wear the pants!

That's the reason why it's better to stay mute and keep your feelings in check.
What happened to honesty by the way? "This ain't the kinda relationship I envisioned boy, time for me to go " . They stay, milk you dry, then wait until it collapses? What rubbish.

bluespice:
ethanol, ur taking my words out of context
i was refering to the women being 'sassy n walking over men'

I am not.  Hopefully you can clarify what you meant.
I do and don't blame the girls who "walk over the men". A lot of the men are letting them get away with it.
[quote author=Ebony-Silk link=topic=252214.msg3643151#msg3643151 date=1238023465]That's if you think it won't work out.
Assumption is different from certainty.

Take this for an example, a prostitute and a politician having a relationship (not an affair). You Know it wnt work out, why try? This might not be the best example, but that's the only one I can think of right now.[/quote]Yeah, that's a horrible example.  One that is far too extreme.

It's simple. tope2000 will be perfect for you.

[quote author=Ebony-Silk link=topic=252214.msg3643131#msg3643131 date=1238023137]When I mean play the game, I don't literally mean play the girl.

To get into a relationship is to take risk. You never know if you two are compatible until you try.

There are sometimes you KNOW it will NOT work out, those times, you need to step out.

Other times, you think it won't work out, you need to give it a try.

What I'm "bleating" about is that when you KNOW you can't restraint her and her "sassyness", don't bother trying to hook up with her. That, is what I call desperation.

@post
I learned a lot. . . .[/quote]But you said, and I quote, "you never know . . . until you try" LOL

Cheating, deceit, disrespect, lack of communication

No. I am very biased in that regard.

But I have to admit that some guys take it too far - eyonegro and hollysmile are good examples. They get so needy and allow themselves to become doormats to girls who continue to treat them like dumpsters.

[quote author=Ebony-Silk link=topic=252214.msg3643069#msg3643069 date=1238021955]If you think you can handle then, then play the game.
If you don't think so, don't even take it as a challenge.


I seriously feel sorry for AA sometimes. Dating ghetto chicks can be a handful.[/quote]What are you bleating about There is no point in playing stupid games when your dignity means more to you than useless mind games.

bluespice:
no
women treat men in mirror image of how they treat themselves around them
meaning whichever way a guy acts around a woman is how she is going to treat him
if he acts with self respet and respect for her, same
if not, dont blame her for teaching him how he should act
its not called walking over, its called putting him in some place
since its obvious he doesnt know where he belongs

I don't buy into that. You can be the most perfect/beautiful lover in the world to an habitual cheater, but that won't stop her from cheating. After some time for some people it becomes a natural part of their cycle. They could have a gem right there in front of them but prefer to find something more challenging, because they prefer adventure to something steady or assured. So yea, you can respect yourself all you want, but if you fall prey to a ninny who has chosen not to respect you, your last option would be to suffer through it or to leave. Leaving is easier said than done once feelings are involved, but at the end of the day it's a choice you have to make.

bluespice:
all of y'all clamouring for the abolition of displays of affection
might u be obliged to give us reasons?

Abeg the reasons plenty o jare ma naija sista.

I have personally found that sassy britches will step all over you if you are too nice: always expressing your feelings to her, being generous, caring, and all that mushy stuff.  You lose your sense of power, and once that happens she will no longer find you appealing. It's as if you are not strong minded or have no power over your emotions. All the while the guy's intention was to make her happy. But he comes off as insecure or obsessive.

Old boy, in as much as I want to feel sorry for you in this position, I can't help but laugh. You put yourself in this mess. I guess it's true that love is irrational. You are conscious and fully aware of the fact that this girl is behaving like a nuisance, yet you are rewarding her bad behavior with gifts. How do you expect her to fully realize her mistakes or even feel remorseful about them if you keep treating her like a royal queen? Mind you, I think it's safe to say that you are her "mugu" or "golugo" or whatever other name is used these days. When they say "the boy is good" remember that APA lo nje be. Think twice and think fast. Love with your head, don't be a fool.

Lol this post always cracks me the fork up each time I read it.

Dear Holly,
Just forget about that girl. Do not take her back when she comes crawling back to you with her silly apologies. Life is too short for you to gamble with your heart. Erase her from your life, your sim card, your hard drive, everything. Erase every single hint of memory you have of her. Please don't mistakenly believe her when she says she loves you. It's total bull! Move on.

tnk24:
When you love your partner deeply, at times, it is better not to show them the depth of that love.

Keep your emotions absolutely in check.

Hollysmile:
I've learnt never to fully trust a woman, They don't worth it.
Secondly, i've learnt 2treat them, gals, like i don't care for dem.

Patented!

As the infamous quote goes, I have learned that love breaks your heart to teach you to be strong. I die, just a little, so I can live a little bit more.

lie

Peep this

"  I met a stunningly beautiful and charismatic girl about two and a half years ago. We had a really intense relationship that lasted for 3 months until I broke it off because I knew it wouldn't last. Although we shared great chemistry and physical attraction, there were problems early on that led me to believe that if things did not improve, I could not keep on going with the relationship.

I didn't want either of us to get too attached, so I ended things after I was certain it woudn't work.  I still am certain that the baggage and our differences in views would have ended the relationship later if we had continued. Despite that fact, I had strong feelings for her at the time of the breakup and realize that I still am in love with her after two and a half years. She was my first and only love.

Does it make more sense to break up with someone you have strong feelings for because the relationship wasn't working, or do you wait until the problems become unbearable and your feelings change to make a break? 
When both parties are still in love, how do you cope with leaving someone and find closure?   "

The source

ogazi007:
Inasmuch as they spare my life and that of my wife,no qualm.afterall u cant be so sure that your wife has never been gang banged several times before you met her.i will only watch with a keen intrest the skills of the robbers and thereafter perfect my style.dont go misbehave before the robbers will come back and dash u one bullet.

LOLOLOL DIES

Love is not the be all cure all.

roflmao

tiniyata:
A broken relationship is better than a broken marriage.Let go of the guy completely,cos u dont want to settle for a substitute.U said u have left him,good.But what u need to work on is how to forget him completely,cos love makes any human vulnerable,by so i mean that if u ever have loved a person,even though u break up with him/her,at times u find urself thinkin about the person,mostly in ur quiet moments.And if u come up here to tell us that u have forgotten him so soon,that will be the greatest of all lies

larayat:
no one is forcing anyone here, d fact dat u dont like it does nt mean u'll have to critizes it in a way dats is negative

Sure, I suppose you're expecting me to do something counter-intuitive to what I believe, right? """"""" I don't fancy "Jenifa" so I should praise it. """""""""" You are quite the scholar!

topup:
[color=#008855]I can't speak for all women, but I want someone mature enough who can express himself (he doesn't need to be an emotional reck, but I can't cope with mind reading).

Also, it is important for him to be loyal, trustworthy and have deep faith in God.

These were the lessons I learnt from past relationships, I'm not asking for a clone, I'm asking for a reasonable person with good moral and beliefs.
[/color]

I can't cope with women who encourage you to express yourself freely, but get taken aback and turn completely distant when you do. Simon says, once you unsheath your sword to your pana, more often than not, she will ditch you.

Oops, but then again I haven't actually been in a so called relationship. The sassies could never get past the getting-to-know-you phase.

Never compromise on the things that matter the most to you. Never lower your standards to accomodate your pana.

To love is nothing
To be loved is something
To love and be loved is everything

Lol @ thread title     classic