₦airaland Forum

Op here is what you ll do.
Gather your mind and decide that he ll either stop this or the marriage will end. For him to tell the househelp to disobey u openly is a signal of his growing lack of respect for you which you caused by letting him demean you in public with no consequences.

Now get ready to make him feel you hate him. When he shouts at you in public again for like maybe a minute or 2, ensure that you use the next 28 mins to tell him his life history and his grandfather's own. You can actually time yourself. ..remove your mouth from brake and let it run as if he stole your money. Even after the shout, keep throwing dirty and hateful looks at him such that he ll wonder If it's safe to sleep in d house.

Now after all these, the following might happen:

He ll ask for a divorce or drive you out of his house.. whereby u can get a good lawyer and get some financial benefits.

He ll be so shocked at your actions, he ll remember how he married you and try to make peace and win your love back.

Police will arrest you both and someone will snap d pic and post it on nairaland with the title.. ' Wife goes kolomental on mentally deranged husband (Photos) '.

Don't bother thanking me..

All the best..

I tell you solemnly OP.... D day u meet the woman that is for you... U won't know when you ll sit on the floor and cry like a baby..

Cheating could make you lose a good woman and instead of keeping her on her toes, will make her see no future with you and look elsewhere for certain security.

It is terrible folly to sit down in my parlour and think I know what another human being will feel or do.

But what I ll agree to in your post is self containment for both male and female.

Don't overdo love lest the familiarity starts breeding contempt...

It is my summation from reading every post here that Nigerians are incapable of minding their own business.

Also that haterz gonna hate..

Therefore, I ll just drop this kind reminder that the porn* actress Maheeda is married with 2 children and her marriage has lasted longer than those of 'humble' women.

Even fine Bobo Drake, a billionaire in his own right, is going after constantly almost naked Billionaire Rihanna.
Money befriends money.

Life has no manual brothers and sisters...

It's not compulsory she marries a Nigerian if they don't fit what she wants. Her counterparts have been marrying foreigners who won't disturb or stifle their lives.

So Linda babe... I think you could consider joining #teamforeignguys.

And be happy.. And keep making your billions in peace and unstifling harmony.

Amen!!!

Young03:
went to the mortuary the other time, I saw a fine girl with a Brazilian hair laying dead,

fresh bobby n nice ass

what came to my mind was...oh so na termite go enjoy all this stuff...bad


maybe she even dey hide am from guys when she was alive

Just imagine for a minute someone makes this very same comment about your dead sister..

Yieldings:
Not funny.

Tell am ooo...

33bandit:
this sexual assault issue is not something serious .a normal person have once or more times gist someone about there sexual escapees .he is a man after all ..if it was Nigeria .we for hear alotta oloshoes talking about one night stand with prominent people like dem buhari sons and GEj ..even Hilary Clinton was raped so no body is an angel besides we don't need perfect people .we only need people who are ready to admit there mistakes and are ready to learn

Wow...did u notice how you said Hillary Clinton was raped like it's a crime she committed on herself so she is not holy/perfect because of it? Being raped has made her an imperfect person?Amazing, you are some piece of work.

Gaborone:
But really, how do you just bring down your husband down before the world like that?

As an adult, one should learn to outrightly or subtly refuse to answer questions they aren't comfortable with, or questions that should not be answered at a particular place, time, or at all. That beats misfiring every single time.

I think the same way he just brought his wife down too.

Just wondering about the IOS of a general Nigerian brain. If a man condemns or speaks against his wife in public, she must be a bad woman and if a wife does the same, she must be a bad woman. The man is innocent and right in all things.

Hmm...There is God oo...

emperorchedda:
Truth is, Muhammadu and Aisha are under one roof, controlled by one pilot and with one voice, whatever comes out from that house should be in uniform, the head of that house is President Buhari, so even if Aisha has an opinion contrary to that of our president it should be confined into the house and after it is resolved a unified voice will air it out

A house where the wife makes public an opinion different from that of her husband (head) is a total direspect to him

A married woman's opinion in public should only back that of her husband whom she is loyal to till death... they should be seen not heard

ChaI! !! Nigeria my country, which way? Women are you seeing? Your future and daughter's future in this country? Hmm. ..ok o..watching in 3D. End of the world coming soon..

JUSTbuchi:
I thought most peeps like the op were becoming sensible lately but dang! I was wrong

Who is you mbok?

Oya ladies, over to you. Reply in one sentence.

OILSOUP:
OK AS I SAY I NO GO GIVE MY DAUGHTER ANYTHING, COME AND CARRY ME.



IN NIGERIA LAWS ARE MADE BUT UNENFORCEABLE.



MR BODE, IGBOS CANNOT DISOBEY THEIR ANCESTOR AND FOLLOW A YORUBA DECEIVER.



U HAVE JUST WASTED UR TIME, WE THEIR FATHER WILL EXCLUDE THEM OURSELVES.


U CANNOT LOVE MY DAUGHTER MORE THAN ME.

Speak for yourself and your pitiful female lineage. As for me and mine. .whether boy or girl, they shall have equal share. If the boy doesn't like it, he should go and till the soil and make his own money for his own children. That is God's assignment for men.

Remember that these your same ancestors no allow woman go school to become doctor or banker. We for no get Okonjo-Iweala or Dora Akunyili if we listened to dead and forgotten ancestors...

Abeg who has dollar cash to sell at N460? $200,000.

Hmm this world..
Someone is here worrying about if she will get married...another person is here running away from her marriage..

Women are developing the temperament of men these days..

Sister abeg if you will listen, I tell you solemnly, if you have where you are travelling to, travel and go, if you have degree you want to pursue, go ahead and pursue.

Live your life to the fullest, you never know where your soul mate is but God will lead you to him. So whatever capacity God has provided for you, use it and move on with your life. You can be aware of the need to settle down but don't be desperate or worried about it.

For even as there are stories of one of the poster's single aunt, there are even more stories of suicidal, broken and depressed adulterous married women which is what you might be if you marry someone you have no feelings for.

It is well.

Toks2008:
Nice question.

The issue of a man cheating will forever be a pain in the minds of many ladies but I'm so so sorry to tell you this truth that submitting to your husband is unconditional.

In submittion you can table your grievances and the fact that your hubby cheats on you is not a ground for disrespect. If you want to leave the union because of that then it's your choice but that must not make you disrespect him.

Your husband is your lord.

Oh so loving your wife is not unconditional? I'm sorry to tell you the painful truth in many men's mind is that a submissive wife is fast becoming a thing of the past and as long as men don't accept that, they shall continue to have broken homes and be divorced, twice divorced and eventually separated from their wives.
This goes for the women as well who are greater victims of this.

God can not be mocked or manipulated. When he tells the man, FIRST, to love his wife as Christ loves the church before telling the woman to be submissive, He who created us knows that what a woman needs is love and a man needs respect. One cannot exist without the other, it is humanly impossible. If you see anywhere it is happening then know that it is surface submission.

Only God can help today's marriage. The man that should till the soil is no longer doing so..now needs the woman to follow him and till the soil and still be calling him Lord when she is providing for him instead of the other way round.

Guys just need to realise that a woman is just naturally created just like them in emotions, intellect and exposure no matter what their Nigerian society tells them, it is society that molds and forces her to be quiet and allow you to talk.

Girls should also realise that they are at a disadvantage physically and biologically than men. And God created men stronger in other to protect them and their children. Though many men have abused this strength and have used it to harm instead of defending you, God still gave them that position of a protector. So no matter what, if you can't be submissive because he doesn't provide financially, emotionally or otherwise, be submissive because he is your protector in this terrible world.

And for the viewing public who have never experienced any problem in these regard, don't judge either party until you walk in their shoes.

For men, in this increasingly gay world, think of being under the power of a stronger man than you and being raped and beaten at his will and society will still blame you for it and support him.

For the women, think of someone you should protect and love constantly abusing, insulting, disobeying you or ridiculing you in the public and you are unable to touch them because society will give you a bad name. A home you are expected to control yet you can not speak freely or give directives and expect them to be obeyed for the good of the home.

In all things, for a marriage to succeed, both parties have to use their church mind or else...una go land for Linda Ikeji.

The guy must be a nairalander.

As them dey always talk about money they spend on babes. .and yet the babe has the temerity not to open leg for them. After buying her meat pie, sharwarma and icecream...na d cost of bride price for una village?

Una papa...

As many as can keep a No Sex relationship going I would think.

See guys, you can't change God's destiny for us. He said we will toil the ground before it yields it's fruits, meaning you must work and earn money to spend before your get your desires. That's why our society can have housewives but dem no born the man wey go declare himself as house husband.

Stop lamenting abeg. You must spend money on a girl you date ..This is not a sin. But she doesn't have to sleep with you..which is a sin. So all you lose is your money while she is losing what belongs to her husband alone and sinning against her God too...

Life is a stage, play your role and comot for road..

P

DLondonboiy:
Only you will deny him sex while you were dating..

He con endure endure...marry you..

Week days..you deny am sex!
Weekend too? You still deny am sex!
Is sex now a sin for married people?

If he start to look outside, the woman go come nairaland begin cry 'all men are dogs'

What is wrong with women of this generation?

That's why as a man, you must sabi do. The woman Don tire for d bad or boring activity. But she for just manage am. If I be d uncle, I go go learn how to do so that it's the wife that will be complaining and pursuing him.

But how slap take solve d problem sef?

KRILMIJAY:
its u dt God will punish. slowpoke.
I made a comment and I didn't quote ur name on it so stay clear. its not every statement made here that u girls will carry upon urselves as though ur lives depends on it. the idiot u called someone u dont know dt God will punish u for it? pls remove d log in ur eyes before u try to remove that in ur brodas eyes. Get a life and stop snooping on every comment made on Nairaland. Almighty God will punish u and Trillion times for quoting me and typing rubbish. I am here to comment, u can keep on wailing. #spits#

Oga shut up and learn lesson. Don't u have home training or did they swear for you? How can u call someone barren and be smiling, do u have a child?
Better mind yourself. You don't want to be quoted and you are posting on a public forum.

Mumu.

Na wa oo...
Love is a dangerous emotion sha.

Well done!!!

Not that anybody really cares whether they wear it or not. It's just that when you remember how boko haram were using female Muslim children as suicide bombers..hiding the bombs in their hijab, one can't help but worry.

Our children are in these same schools with them. Abeg we can not shout, wearing hijab to school is a security threat in these times. Especially now that we hear they are in Lagos. Who knows if they are a manipulative mind behind MSSN, using religious emotions to achieve their aim to the detriment of everyone: Christians and Muslims.

May God/Allah preserve His children.

Jarizod:
[color=#679267]
You look really beautiful Aunty smellypussy.y Linda [/color]

Naaàaaa...A lady this loaded and looking this neat and well-packaged cannot just be smelly there...its scientifically and logically impossible...

Wizkid must have been high on oshogbo weed!!!

When you tell them to run away from a cheating husband or boyfriend, dem no go hear...dem go say all men cheat and I want to keep my home.

Oya na...she has kept her home in the grave..

Mschewww...

Errmmm but girls are getting married every Saturday.

Some in Greece, others in Dubai and even Okokomaiko. ..I'm not understanding d problem..

kaeforum:
You over react, what the man said is true, there is a high incidence of men sleeping with their housemaids, the matter calls for investigation not denial.

I no dey react oo. ...I dey help u pray against wetin u take ur mouth talk.

jaybillionaire:
U're damn right! A friend of mine went for a wedding ceremony and said the MC brought out kolanuts and said the only person that can cut this kolanut for the bride and groom is a married woman that knows that since she got married no other man has inserted her... and to his surprise , not a single woman came out and the faces of husbands there were like Wtf is wrong. Only God knows how many wives will answer questions that night. In this same naija, women dey do things o

Looollll...alakoba M C. But shit is real..

kaeforum:
The man is talking from experience, housemaids are better than wife.

Eeyaaahhh....brother may your housemaid not be better than your wife - Amen. And may your gate man not be better than you- Amen...

erico2k2:
Well U must be above 35 hence U are being Emotional instead of being rational.Trust me I aint mucking you, Im jst trying to understand the frame of an above and single 35 years Old lady.

Oga leave me na. I no be woman...I no single...I never reach 35. A beg go do ur research for Opebi left.
Thank you.

erico2k2:
This is how you lot fail i n school, lack of rational thinking puts you i n a dream world that even if teh reality is steering you in the you act as if it do not affect you, for you info I have been married long before you got into secondary school. a bit of advice for you try to check people's profile b4 you go all gaga on them.
Im asking a reasonable question cos there is self denial of some persons going on here, I dunno if you are above 35 but from all indication with some quarters proving to be 21st century proud single lady they refuse to be proud to say hey Im above 35,im single and I wont take nothing less than my standards.How is this question not rational in ur own thinking,I find it xtreemly hard to comprehend.

Oh boy..I find it extremely hard to comprehend what u just wrote and ur thought process. And on that note, I sign off from dis conversation. Bye..

mekonglobal:
The man ofcourse! The both share an equal responsibilities in protecting their union, but we both know that the case u stated is not as prevalent as that of men and their househelp.

I tell u solemnly, the driver and madam ish is realer than fiction. Una never know Nigerian women sha....u think say na by play or mistake dem win most unfaithful wives in d world. Only difference be say...They are eternally coded cuz society will finish dem while d man is more open cuz society will condone him.