₦airaland Forum

udoji2021:
I just come across a thread about this topic and felt like contributing on it.

https://www.nairaland.com/6703059/struggling-hard-money-hasnt-come

Guys, I will not beat around the bush, getting married when you are not financially bouyant is the greatest mistake that can NEVER be corrected, infact, it's a sin and against natural laws to bring someone's daughter to your house when you are struggling to take care of yourself and consequently starts laying foundation of poverty that will last for generations if not forever.

WHY?

Experience is the best teacher, I'm a victim of such circumstances and I know what I face in that type of marriage and is still facing. When you make such mistake, you will start sleeping abnormally which is the first sign of things to come, it will then lead to over thinking and depression. Forget about family members, no one will be there to help you when you needed their help. Begging to feed or meet your financial obligations is even worst cos first, the insults you will receive can make you commit suicide, and if you start this begging, people will always give you fake promises, the time that you would have used in doing productive something will be on moving from one place to another or staying online to reply people. Forget about all this motivational speakers cos you will only see another motivational quote from them when the sh*t hits the fan.

Secondly, the saying that someone obtain favor from Whatever God when you are Married is also false to some extent, God don't pour manna from heaven this days as was reported in the Bible (don't know if this is even true), get married and sit at home waiting for favor from the Lord and see if you didn't die of hunger within days.

Most painful part is that, you may end up suffering for another person children ignorantly, HOW?

Let me give an example, I went to one politician for help and this man told me to back later, he later sent someone to call my wife and start telling her to sleep with him (heavy pregnant woman o) before he can help. I was lucky that my wife told me about it with proof of what the man was doing, that was the day I stopped calling him. Now, what if she agreed without telling me and continued after she birth?

Guys, hustle and settle down first marriage and thank me later.

Lastly, all this girls will keep telling you that I will manage, I will manage, but if they finally come and stay with you, they will not manage again. Infact, that is how some women have finally taken over their houses and start maltreating the husbands for been weak.

In a nutshell, I'm of the opinion that a guy should hustle and have money, hustle hard again and have more money before he can start thinking of marriage.

Hmmmm

Please do...








And then use your remaining earnings to maintain it

Person wey wan help you go help you...

But most importantly, help comes from above. Trust God for help and most of your needs would be met so long you're not a lazy ass!

Ikpongiton:
even if you are selling bole and kpo fire kerosene and diesel, you will be more comfortable.

Lmaoooo... Guy!!!!

MasterRahl:


If you're rich enough to spend N400k on an HSE certificate, then you're rich enough to create jobs, employ your fellow youths, and take them out of the labor market

How?

sophirebenitez:
Since you say you have a steady income and you've been together for say 3+ years, means you have gotten to know her and her family well.

Put a ring on it.

Love your wife, manage her family.
24 is not too young.

Thank you!!!

Eprincess:
Dear OP

Before I address the issue of your girl's brothers asking for money, try to answer the following questions

1. Do you have a job?
2. If you get married, are you sure you won't have to depend on your parents to raise your family?
3. Do you have a career plan?

I don't have a problem with you getting married, I just have a problem with the timing. You are 24 and you have a bright future ahead of you. You need to build your career and improve yourself first. Also, advise your girl to build her career first.

Tell the brothers to start doing something with their lives. Let them get a job, pursue education and start building themselves because you can't carry the responsibility of 5 more people when you are just starting life.

I can see manipulation on your girl's part. I feel threatening to commit suicide and going into prostitution is a way to make you feel guilty. Don't marry someone out of pity. You come first.

Clearly the guy can take care of himself and his babe... Read his responses on the fp.

I don't also think he's marrying her out of pity.

We (speaking generally now) keep making early marriage look like a bad thing when in fact the real reason most(not all) young dudes delay today is the financial ability to sponsor the wedding rites, and the responsibility of taking care of another person!

If you're young, have the money, and find love. And you understand that there's no perfect/ideal marriage. Know what it takes to be understanding and your spouse is with you on the same page. You have your parent(s) blessings, what stops you bikonu?

anthonyuncle:
what you mentioned above are part of what am saying.
you think you are ready but I'll advice you use some time to build yourself and your lover more.
work on your strengths and weakness.
don't rush into marriage(cause that's how it looks),
marriage will not be the end of your troubles except you start working on your troubles (effectively) now

What do you mean rush into marriage? Recently saw a 103 and 100 couple share their story, (they got married at ages 19 and 16 respectively (I know, and that's besides the point)). Point is, it has little or nothing to do with age!!!! So long they are legally of age, and in this case, they are!

They should get married and grow together. He's only asking for advice on how to deal with the future brother in law's unending demands. And you're here capping nonsense. If you don't have an answer to his question, move along!

Rest please!!!!

@ OP it's okay to ask questions when you need clarity in life's issues! Don't let nobody tell you otherwise! You're a man, you're a man, solve your problems by yourself! That's the cause of so many issues we, men, have today.

Best wishes!!!

slowice:
Are you more Nigerian than he is? I see you are in love with your chains

Stockholm syndrome

Powersurge:
Saying we have a long way to go in Nigeria is begging the real situation.

Lmfaooo ����

Grgton:
Rivers mainland to be connected to Bonny??

Wow

Wike is just a developer

Can he fund it?

Abi you think say na all those gra gra

ogascomax:
You we not know what you are doing to yourself until it is too late. You are not been vaccinated but you are simply under going a clinical experiment. That is why you are hearing first dose, second. Bet me it doesn't end in second dose. They will call for third and fourth until you have fully trusted in the vaccination before you will receive what you never bargained for.

Na wah

818707

Cipherson:
Where did everyone go to.?

Who is everyone?

abdulwahhab001:
That's my greatest Challenge, I had to give up at a certain time when almost to of my clients asked me to send security money, I was fed up and gave up, please any advice sir

Once you see security money. Walk away.

You have an indication for the most part with the job descriptions. If it's truly your field, you should be able to read the description and know that a project is genuine (for the most part).

Jh0wsef:
I am yet to understand how upwork works especially with 'connects'. I got tired of it sincerely

Connects are like the purchasing power on Upwork. Some jobs have higher connects required to put in the proposal.

Some jobs require 1 connect, others could require as much as 6 connects.

You pay for the connects as a free/basic member. Some other freelance sites have monthly subscription plans. Upwork uses connects.

On the average 10 connects cost $1.5 ( I type to be corrected).

That's why you need to select the jobs you submit proposals to. Make sure can convince the client to contact you.

Luckily now, clients contacting you for a job posting gives you 10 free connects!

Dandy1:
LOL. You are short changing yourself. If you are as good as you said you are, then you have more chances of making more money with foreign clients. Nowadays, I catch my clients on freelance sites and take them out of there.

Working from home is sweet, my neighbours think I'm into yahoo or something. �

I swear!!!

It is

Adegunle4:
Bro, please I need someone to lead me on this Fiverr platform... I offer Architectural services and I have gotten a few jobs on Upwork... I have good contents and also very good at what I do but I don’t just seem to have a way around this Fiverr thing.

You've broken even on Upwork and you're still looking for Fiverr...

Stick to the Upwork! It can give you consistent streams my brother. I'm in the same field as you. I just strive to learn more every day. When I'm not earning, I'm learning. Literally!!!

temitope27:
Will you keep shut, nothing works in this country

Ignorance is Bliss.

They dunno

psalms37:
This is me right now, I always wonder if I'm doing something wrong. Thank goodness I'm not the only one

I'd drop a few tips for newbies on Freelancer.com and Upwork.com ( I don't use Fiverr).

See more here

Modified:



I'd drop a few tips for newbies on Freelancer.com and Upwork.com ( I don't use Fiverr).

1) You need to be online all the time. All the freaking time. This means you'd need:
a) Very regular power supply
b) Fast internet.

2) Drop your hourly rates and bid amounts. As you're starting out, don't have "big eyes" except you have a really outstanding portfolio. Make your bid as fair as possible to the clients budget. If budget is, say, $30-$250. Your bid should be around $50-ish. Right now, you need reviews. So do the job well at the best possible price and get great reviews.

3) Build a good an outstanding portfolio.

4) Stay awake more at night. Target times from 1300 to 2400 hrs WAT.

5) BE CONSISTENT. Look at it as an actual job and treat it as such. Don't expect to put in time whenever you feel like it or are free and yet want to make a killing. Joke's on you!


6) BE MORE CONSISTENT.

7) Craft good proposals. Short but good! Also try to be among the first ten person's to drop a proposal (both on Upwork and Freelancer). Talk about the project, the client and how you intend to bring value to the project in your proposal and less about you.


8.) Keep to timelines! Don't give unrealistic timelines.

9) Politely ask for 5-star rating when job is completed.

10) Don't give up easy!


God luck!!!

Do you have the charging port panel for Redmi Note 5 pro in stock?

Amotolongbo:
He does.
If you do not put your hands forward for the handshake, he may assume you aren’t interested based on your own principle

This is absolute nonsense.
How does who the president choose to hand shake concern me?

I want good governance, some people are crying on how Buhari didn’t shake Remi Tinubu.

Your moniker is a tongue twister.

Attempting to pronounce it is giving me aches

Viknat:
Aje sir

Aje nwene madu. Dele?

Viknat:
this man don smoke igbo from abbi this morning. My kwale/ukwuani guys on this forum go understand. Oshogbo no get better igbo for where Abbi dey . Trust me

Kweke!!!

BarrElChapo:
Where's the sultry in the photos OP take time o

Kaavia again

Teaser4:
Jack get sense... Ghana better pass nigeria

Kaavia don turn meme

2shaw:
Jazz

Lol. Okay. Strange cause I know Ogume as a place.

2shaw:
We know them,they are not yahoo boys,they are ogume boys. Its always beyond repair and they die on the spot, from Ghana to Nigeria,na same thing. Ghana burgers gone will u pick and die or drink and die.

Hian!!! What does ogume boys mean please?

DSC7:
Remain small make i type RIP......


I hold am tight jareh.....


Ogume boys.....

Abeg no ves. Wetin ogume boys mean?