₦airaland Forum

prophetfire:
. She wash her obo, use the water give you food. That's why. Someone that refused your marriage proposal but prefers to be your side-chik isn't a normal girl. Assuming you are the one that dumped her, I can understand. That one na destiny destroyer. Run for your life cos you have been hooked. Go for deliverance.

blazepascal:
Why didn't u marry ur ex

Because she refused me.

mrdharkchild:
Kill her. That's what u actually want to hear. Since u r countering everyone's opinion.
Kill her, or make out with her and kill your marriage.. The choice is yours

i be Uduak?

Diamond23:
make her second wife so both of u can fornicate in peace

FutureHNDRxXx:
Mods need to come up with a way to ask OPs to verify their stories before it can be published on the front page. Makes no sense with topics like this hitting the fp and dude says its fiction.

Give me your number make I help you contact Seun

PrettyBoyBreezy:
I understand what you are going through, there's a girl like that in my life. Kindly give me ur wife's phone number so i can relay tis gist as gently as i can. Then you can move on with your ex that previously rejected you nd live happily ever after.

Alawada. Funny enof, I am not married.

Kaybae:
You don't know what you are doing, why are some men so wicked, do you even know the emotional trauma a cheating husband causes his wife? I'm a victim, when you already trust your husband and you found out he is cheating on you though still denying it, why can't you man up enough and delete her contact? When you know she is good for you why did you decided to settle with your wife? Some men are just disgusting, and there is no way this will not affect the home because they will always be on phone chatting with girlfriend and neglecting their wife. God will see you through Sha.

hhmmmm. You are right. Sometimes, it is difficult to let things like this go esp when one is completely immersed in it. It only takes God to pull out from it. I am glad you came out.

Toto is the same This would be a topic for another day. I still dey make investigative journalism on it.
I get your point though

amanze2020:
Please have respect for your wife. What is really wrong with you?

Toto no dey two types, na the same thing.

Dis adultery and fornication wet dey hungry you since, you better respect yourself and respect your wife, otherwise you will regret it and become the most confused man on earth.

Adultery have ruined so many families.

Toto is the same.

humilitypays:
If she never marry, make you de browse her internet de go like that na free wifi be that. Lucky you

bad Shaid.

ednut1:
Oponu

Make I help you abuse the person. Oniranu

poweranger:
since u are eventually married like u mentioned u obviously dont need that kinda closeness with her anymore sir, u have to stay away from her, quit the calls, so u don't end up destroying ur marriage.

Thanks @Poweranger

elmoduddah:
Why are people thinking the ex is the problem and she is manipulative? Did she force him to communicate with her? I also was battling with feelings for my ex shortly before i got married and I noticed its because we were still working together on some business. I had to end the business deal we had, even thought i lost money. And then i blocked his posts on Facebook, mute him on all platforms. Now I can’t remember when last he flashed through my mind until i saw this post. He should stop fooling around and do the right thing.

You are right

jaxxy:
A gal that turns u down and friend zoned u when u had every chance and opportunity to marry her and now ure married wants to make out with u is madd. U better ignore that idiot.

Ask her her reasons for not going along with u when u both had the opportunity u may realize she’s not worth the stress. Once u get married every other gal shud get ugly lol unless u didn’t love who u married then that’s another story.

Thanks @jaxxy
You are among the few with senses.

Simran94:
See question

If it's a married lady that posted this and said she's in love with her EX, the kind of names that would have been thrown at her ehn? Chai

Na so e be for guys too.

sammirano:
Op you are a fool. Ok. First you need no validation from anyone on what to do. If you really fancy the lady take her as your mistress already. Its a fucking mans world, learn to live it.

I love nairaland.

olaarie:
You are mischievous. E go clear for ur eyes soon ���

Ok

uwagboe1:
Useless dick got me laughing for ages

Don't mind madam Ginaz.

Administration1:
Bro, I'm currently in your shoes Brother

Na dem dem! . you were right about one thing. If you had read through some of the replies, you would not have wrote this long epistle. All the same, I get your point Mr. Kasari!

ceaser:
Bámidélé or whatever you call yourself, you nor well. Shey o wà okay shá? I think your name should be added to the list of Playboys and demons along with names like Femi, Tunde, Segun, Vincent, Chuks etc that are commonly heartbreakers.

When he now has problems with his marriage as a result of infidelity, he will not allow people rest on Nairaland. Then you will start seeing front page topics like "Help, I'm married but my ex-girlfriend got pregnant for me", "Help, my wife has threatened to kill herself and I when she discovered I have a relationship outside", "Help, I'm married but I slept with my ex-girldriend and now I think I have HIV", "New couple clash as wife pours acid/hot oil on cheating husband".

Nonsense. Except this OP is trying to catch cruise or trend with this topic, I don't think he deserves any advice of any kind. Because if indeed it's true life story, then I'm sorry for him and I hope he burns in Hades for betraying the love of his wife and mortgaging the peace in his family by even remotely entertaining any iota of romantic urge towards that ex.

What nonsense. An ex is called that for a reason. Do you realize that it will be more painful for your spouse if she finds out your infidelity is with your ex more than it will be if it is with any random girl? Thinking of your ex alone is a slap on your wife cos it simply means she is not worth as much as the ex to you in the first instance.

I don't even stay as "friends" once we've dated before. Even if you turn down my advances but still want to smartly put me in the friend zone or in the "please I urgently need 2k zone", you become enstranged to me at once. You become an outcast, an anathema and a virus to be avoided at all cost.

The only person that should deserve your attention is the one who was ready to accept you/accepted you and that person is your wife. For whatever reason the ex rejected you at that time, you should move on and ignore her memories even if you can't totally delete them.

I'm so pissed right now.



It's understandable that humans (both male and female) are polyphahic, hoping to try out new menu different from what they currently enjoy. Even if his wife gives it to him in all manner conceivable only in p0rn movies, guys may still wish to get laid outside. The agreement between the dude and his wife was to be faithful till death do them part. It's a different cup of tea if they agreed on an open relationship/marriage or if they agreed on polygamy from the start cos he will not be breaking an agreement that way. The wife will have a prepped mind that her husband may also be getting it outside, so no emotional trauma will ensue from that.

What is annoying in his short post is the fact that he did not even give any sign of worrying about the effect his actions will have on his wife. Such disrespect.

to200:
How is that our business

Then, look away!

dalass:


@OP, you didn't do in summary at school?

I no pass Summary Joor.
Don't mind me. I just dey give the story raw as e dey come

Sunnymatey:
The devil want to use that demon (the lady) to ruin your marriage.

This is the programming
1. Your wife will divorce you when she get to know.
2. The lady herself will dump you like you ever exist
3. Depreesion will set in
4. Then your peace of mind is gone and finally
5. Thought of sucide
Be wise

You are right. All these you stated here has happened to someone I know. The only thing he didnt do is your last point.

kingsleefolli:
You are not wise for exposing personal life here,this nairaland people will make your case worsen.solve your problem within your self.not all issue come here.nairaland people are not solution solver.they are problem manager.all of us.

You are right. But it is not what you are thinking. The reason for this story is to,
1. identify sensible nairalanders
2. get different opinions about issues of life since this particular incident happens to 60% of the younger generations as clearly stated by one person on this thread.

All the same, I get your point.

Ojemedad:
Tomorrow you will come to us and say you want to be a leader. you want to rule Nigeria , ordinary feelings you cant control

I no be Buhari

praiseneo:
calm d fvck down na u find advise na u still de reply almost everyone with unserious vibe

Me self just dey catch cruise bro. All na fictions.

nehemiah111:
Feelings is a very strong spirit same thing happened to me too... You have to deal with it fast bro before it takes away your happiness permanently.

Hhmmmmm. You are right

AmgrayLogistics:
You need prayer.
May God guide you

Thanks. We all do.

Kingstanding:
. If you still love her my candid advice is for you to divorce your wife. Must you bring everything to nairaland? What is happening to you do happen to 60% of men and women if I'm not mistaking. Best of luck.

Not my story really and it is still mine all the same. I get your point there anyway.

sweetshisha:
They are all like that.... Just friend zone her, because running from her would keep the feelings stronger.... Tell her all about yourself love and sex life , let her know she is just and old friend and your heart is elsewhere

I have an ex with 2. Kids who had managed to keep in touch since 2012

She always has one reason or the other to get in touch

HHmmmmmm

crackhouse:
U go soon marry spirit wife.

Na u go first marry one na
Alawada

bepositive11:
It's tricky. You will have to either leave your wife and be with her, or cut her out of your life completely if you wish to stay with your wife. If you can, try to remain friends with her but define clear boundaries.

hhmmmmm. okay.
Thanks

OlawaleBammie:
But now her eyes don clear abi??

Na win win, make she sef dey battle with the trauma and pains. Laslas una go give unasef belle.

We no fit see eye to eye again. Na on fone we go dey talk