₦airaland Forum

Odunnu:
I'v had my fair share of intimacy and dat'l last me till sept.

Odunnu can lieeeeeeeeee! Haba we no be small pikin now

I have the very solution to both of you Odunnu and googles. I will be your connecting link It should be a wonderful 3som. I'm under 30 but if Odunnu gets to be too aggressive for me (unlikely), I will let her lose steam on googles. Odunnu won't hv to cross over to the other side. It's a win win and everybody is happy.

He is so not over you yet!

WOW!!! Naija for show. Lawless at the highest order. Thank God you are safe at least.

Odunnu:
I'll stick with my agemates jor.I dnt want any man dying on me during my aggressive ride.LOL

Odunnu haba, how aggressive can you be? I am beginning to fear you now

Odunnu:
How does it work with guys?

For men, its on a case by case basis. I suspect the same goes for women too. The type of experience might make  a difference too. Don't forget that stamina is found on the younger folks but who knows the daddies might hv a way around it.

Is that your excuse?

I disagree.

Courtship should last till the point where you decide to either marry or break up. No timelines or limits. I do not believe in divorce. If they don't believe in divorce and they are the work it out no matter what type, its good. They will find their marriage exciting like new dating relationships still enjoying the honeymoon period. There will be shocks but that is all part of the fun.
If they are okay with divorce if things don't work out, then its always an option for them and they can always enjoy the ride for as long as it goes for.

Dont forget people date for years and still divorce anyways. Others dont even court (for whatever reason) and still last forever. If you already know who exactly you 'the one' is, whats the point of courting for love if you already know.

SA Goddess:
Doesn't trust her because either is messing around or terribly insecure! Check him o!

GBAM!!!!

Nothing else needs to be said.

dammywale:
@deniyor. yes she is d one. she use to tell me that she can look into my eyes for long cos she is shy
@ ALL: I think she is not dating anyone like someone sugested, but come to think of it even if she is dating anyone competion is allowed in life. I just pray i will win our love one day. but she use to tell me that there is no other person that she only need to settle some issues with herself that i should cool than. Everything will be fine.

It's those kind of stmts that get guys like you in big trouble. If she is dating anyone, you better leave it alone. Competitition is only good if no one has sealed the deal.

dammywale:
she only need to settle some issues with herself that i should cool than.

she is giving you the 'its not you, its me' speech. Maybe I'm being prematurely judgemental here, but I'll tell you this girl doesn't believe you r the one. If she does, she will be snapping you asap. You either start leaving her now and consider other options ( which might help her make up her mind anyways) or you should enjoy while it lasts till she finds someone else. Careful you don't just get blueballs for nothing. (Google the ladder theory)

one mopol:
really? meaning you have been here before. its not funny o

Oh yeah. I've been there lots. I also experienced it b4 going in to my current relationship. I personally wouldn't say I made the best decisions but I hv always been the type of person that knows decisions hv consequences and you should be able to live with yours. I live with mine, and at the moment, I am content with it. The reason I am avoiding advising you on what to do is simply cos I don't even know if I did the right thing or not, but I did it anyways. Wouldn't want to mislead another brother, it will be on my conscience.

Just remember that some things like sex are what you call a 'one way' street.

As for Woke4all and Hollandis, make una enjoy una self. Hopefully the very girl wey una like will have spare tires on the side too. All is fair in love and war.

you should go look for ones that will keep you more entertained. Careful tho, you might really be the boring one to her.

When you take breaks, it is assumed to be temporary and there are rules that are agreed to by both parties. If there are no rules established, it is more likely a break up and break is just to let the other party down easier. In the absence of rules, and your desire to move on, then you should move on. No timelines.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ @Ebonyeyes
Someone has to do the lady anyways. I guess only a black man can rise to such challenges . Like some say, there is more to love. As for me, thats too much to love and suffocate on. What if you are sleeping and she rolls her belly unto the guy's face, omo na die be that o!

pardon me I digress.

Ebonyeyes, your profile pix na wao!

ok

Is that the same girl that doesn't respond when you tell her you love her or you miss her?
If it is, you should put everything into perspective and consider what type of relationship you already have with her. There are two reasons
1. she is totally shy. She is afraid to commit to you and doesn't know what to do or how to do so. In that case, its all good, don't push it, she'll come around and she is yours already. No need for the big pressure on her. But that is if and only if she is a very shy and reserved person. If there is sex involved btw you two, you shouldn't even bother about all that. Learn to be patient with her instead

2. If she is not the shy and reserved type(sex or no sex, doesn't matter), you are just her friend, her backup plan till something else comes along. If there is no sex, you are her best friend. Move on. If there is sex, you are either her backup plan or her boy toy. Enjoy it while it lasts.

MzBabs:
lol.
Now lemme get this str8.
Somebody slapped your lady, and your reaction was to get on Nairaland and ask us what to do?
Your natural instinct wasn't to protect her?
lol.
No wahala bro. She won't stick around much longer. Problem solved. lol

LWKMD.

@poster
smart move you didn't do anything right away. Don't act in haste. You should take your time and consider your next line of action. A couple of months to a year should be enough to consider what you need to do. When you are done, come back here and tell what what you decided to do and we will deliberate again. Rascal!

Congratulations! you can make God happy and be his beloved. All you have to do is dedicate the baby from the copulation into God's house. It wouldn't be hard to do since it belongs to the pastor anyways. God will reward you for your sacrifice. Everybody wins. Hehehehe

Tough spot to be in. Anyways I will refrain from advising you on this one, but I do feel you real well. If you happen to know the right choice to make, abeg tell me so I keep in my list of options when such comes up again.

Are u talking abt me?
Move on pretty, you missed your chance already. The story seemss like I'm the one at the other end. Anyways, if he is not single, don't go there. What goes around comes around, I'm assuming thats how it is said.

This is the part I never get -> How can someone come ask for your hand in marriage when you are in a relationship. Why can't people just face one relationship at a time. If you are interested in getting married and your partner is not ready, you mutually break up and seek your pastures somewhere else, not cutting deals while still holding unto one. Your bf didn't even need to chase the guy away, you should hv urself. After all, if you weren't cutting shows already and you were already in a relationship, the other guy doesn't know you well enough to ask for your hand in marriage, maybe dating but not marriage.

That aside, I know what it means to be jobless for a long while and the struggles that go with it. Your bf is not ready to marry you now. He has other things to worry abt. Whether he will ever be ready is a function of your relationship 'strengths' when things are a bit more calm and stable. Don't push it. Else LEAVE if you want to.

When things are better off for him, it doesn't mean he will marry you. It just means you have a edge in having a chance to build a more stable relationship with him. It's easier for you if you are there during his trying time. If he leaves the country, your relationship has a lesser chance in ending in marriage but still a chance, and a function of the kind of relationship you have built already.

Pardon me, I talk too much . The whole point is, sit down and have a frank heart to heart talk about your concerns. If he is serious with you, you can always meet his family even if marriage is not on the table yet. You can be a part of his life at least.

iice:
[color=#9900ff]He's principled. . .so i don't see how he's not worth the trouble if he dumps her. She's not worth the trouble for starting with lies. . .unnecessarily wahala[/color]

MRbrownJAY:
@poster
you wrote the following:

what about if the guy has moral and dont agree with starting a relationship on deceit?!
if the guy has principles and this girl decided to lie in order to fall within his principles then she has only herself to blame when she gets dumped for these same reasons.

the fact that the guy is smoking hot & liked her clouded her judgment!

Gbam!!!! You guys said it all

meggieblac:
Really? At least you are sincere.

Don't mind all these guys, they are all lying and pretending. People have done worse for money or for sex. No be person dey sleep with mad woman? Some of them will even do it for free it 'agro' catch them or if the so called face as a nice figure to it. I am likely to believe them if they say they will do it but no one must know abt it.

I love you

I'll never leave you

Nothing happened, Biggest of all

Yep, For a million naira. As long as there are no consequences to the kiss except for the million naira,

The relationship part is the toughest part. If you are doing well in that area already, u dont have much to worry abt. Just remember, Nigerians are very family oriented. In my experience, dating a foreigner has its many challenges. Especially for an african man like me.

I will ask for their forgiveness as I am killing them!

@poster
Dump the guy's ass as ASAP. He doesn't give a shit abt u. I wonder how ladies can still talk like this when u know for a fact he is cheating on u with someone else. If someone cares abt u, he will make time for u. Face it and do what's best for u.

On the other guy, well it might be time to study/ work on another relationship. He may or may not be the guy for you. The fact he wants to get married within a yr is not what's important. Its the chemistry btw u two,