₦airaland Forum

abobote:
Very rude girl. The poor have the same mentality, most of them think you are just privileged to be rich and not as a result of hard work. This past Xmas, I was doing a little house renovation in the village, any labourer that I called, will give me x2 of the price, and if I ask why, they will tell me that I'm not in Nigeria and I have the money, so I should allow them to benefit too

That is nsija for you o.
Even if you are in Nigeria, its the same.
I have learnt to use money to make people do my bidding. Very bad but what can one do. As long as you know how to haggle and surprise some people once in a while, they are at your beck and call.

cococandy:
That makes sense seeing as both baking soda and potash are alkaline in nature

Good luck

So yummy and creamy. 15mins max. Love eating it with nothing added. DH said he don't know what it is. I have entered one chance. It's even better I married non igbo.

CSTRR:
They want their daddy, but they need his money.

It's daddy's money that will feed them and send them to school and provide a roof over their head.

Mummy's attention is just vibes.
It's nice but it is not a need to the extent they think it is.

Mummy don't work

Maybe, all the women out there in various fields went out to play.
Mtcheew and very stale.

Bkayyy:
Our women marry, not stay at home (the fathers house) and breed like yours.
Unlike you people then, we have morals

You are a good student of history

cococandy:
Hi.
I’ve cooked it with pressure pot before but it wasn’t as creamy in my opinion.
I don’t know if it’s because of who I got it from. I purchased it.

I wil try then and see. Read we can use baking soda. Thanks.

cococandy:
Yes men can do all that too.
Unless the baby is exclusively breastfed, men can feed in addition to everything else you mentioned. And even more.
That’s how to build the relationship. Children don’t wake up all of sudden and prefer one parent. It starts from infancy and who they knew they could depend on to take care of them.

See them. I be man o. And tomorrow he will start whining

cococandy:
The funny thing is that what OP is saying is one the core messages I always preach to guys on here.
-Be more involved with your kids
-Be hands-on fathers
-Being a father is more than bringing money
-making time for your children to form bonds and attachment is important for their development development

Do you know the kinds of responses I get when I say that?

“Oh these evil feminists want to emasculate men and ruin the divine order of nature by promoting feminine features in men. They want to destroy the family unit. Men and women are not the same. Roles are different we are Africans”. You name it. I’ve heard it.

But now OP is saying the same thing but framing it to talk negatively about women, y’all are buying into the message.
Could it be that you don’t really care about loving your children as much as you care about making your women out to be the enemies??

Ponder on that.

Evil feminist

They don't know any better I tell you.
They don't.

You were brought up in a home, majority here ......., let me reserve my comment.

Abeg, I have dry ukwa, have you cooked it with pressure pot?
I'm not ready to use edible potash.

SeriouslySense:
and to build confident children I would like to understand, how the father should relate with his children, without striking fear and causing trauma or low self-esteem, I think it varies according to the personality of the child, so it's important to know what kind of child he has.

Yes yes, i hope to read some books on child psychology and the importance of the early years of children where the foundation of their personality is created.

You treat each child differently. Even identical twins differs. Surprised to see a guy( assumed) interested in this topic.
I applaud you.

SeriouslySense:
I wonder what can be gathered from child psychology .

A lot.
The formative yrs of everybody is what makes up what they become in the future. You have finished training your child by 12 to 13 yrs.
The brain absorbs and store those FIRSTS which later stir the cause of one's life. That's why it's always careful to thread with caution when kids are around. If in the future, they encounter difficulty, they held on to that world they were brought up in where mum and dad showered them love unconditionally. It's a propeller

babyfaceafrica:
How can military and sailor daddy cope?

They always do.
Whenever they are home, they take over 100% and give the wife the needed rest.

Most importantly allow them to feel free to express themselves before you even if they don't make sense. Don't judge. We even judge trees.

The main problem is our men are very rigid and believe if they are vulnerable, their kids won't fear them especially the male child. Is fear or respect better than love?
That negatively impacts our males that's why we have so many depressed men with inferiority complex who think their problems are women.
Get a book and go through child psychology and know why Nigeria is the way it is. Everything starts from the home. Get it right with your kids and you have a progressive healthy society.

Morenikeji090:
No matter the logic we men gonna play.... Child will always love mother more than father. What is natural is hard to change... Wake up...

Child will not love mummy more if dad does the right thing.

How many dad do school run, help in homework and listen attentively to gibberish that children say?
Even eat on the same plate with them?

You are eating and cut some meat, call one of your child and give her that meat or divide the meat amongst them?
The child nose is blocked and you do the needful?

During pta, you are there instead of mum?
Mum works as you but make out time for these kids. Cook with them in the kitchen even if it's making a cup of chocolate etc.
These are what endears children to parents not money.

Very divisive approach that will make the kids hate you more.
Kids need their daddy not his money.

Until you know that, kids will grow to continue tilting towards mummy side

Rivers people, the laziest set of people ever in Nigeria.
Their men are so lily livered cowards.
None, I mean non aspires to be somebody except oil thief and kidnapper.
As for their women, your parents will kick u out of the house if at age 16 you haven't started bringing money home.
Mothers organise men for their teen girls.

I have repeatedly asked myself why they are very lazy but no answer. No industrialist, no reputable scholars, no high profile entrepreneurs.
Only crooks like amaechi and wike.

If not igbos that developed pH, it would have looked like one village in Katsina.

Zona123:
Go to any Catholic bookshop and buy a book called "LOVE AND LIFE" read through to the end with your partner and you'll be amazed on how it's possible to achieve your desired child's sex

People of nowadays don't read.
I read that book at jss1 when a Dr came to my school to teach about safe sex.
So confusing but trust girls. We religiously followed through with the monthly assignments. Before I started menstruating, I had already crammed everything on that book. Later learnt its used for marriage course in Catholic Church.

Everything lady need to know about her body is on the pa smear.

KanwuliaExtra:
By 18?

Every day separated from the children makes her a stranger to them.

How can they bond with her when she was not part of raising them?

As boys, the fear is that they will become just as psychologically-damaged as FFK.

Any child FFK raises cannot be normal. The only reason his daughters are well-adjusted is because he did not raise them.

I see why PC (Precious Chikwendu) is concerned. What mother will be ok with house-helps raising her children when she is alive?

FFK is afraid that PC will do a DNA test on the boys and expose him to the world that they are not biologically related to him.

Remember PC said something to that effect?

If the DNA comes back with negative paternity status for FFK. GAME OVA!
FFK will be without sons. Where will he start from again?

They will bond. Its not her fault. The same way children bond with absentee fathers. The void is there.
As for ffk, he wasn't smart at all.
Precious is from my place. Our tradition says if your wife is impregnated by another man while married to you, that child belongs to you. But here, ffk didn't pay pride price. So the customary law is not holding. The constitution of Nigeria will make him her husband yet he didn't do court marriage.
The worst is that 6yrs living with him, no sex. What is ffk fighting for actually. Its a lost battle, I tell you. Very dumb man.
Precious is the smart one here. Just time and patience.

That's why he refused dna. I don't pity him

At first I never wanted to comment on this matter as I was so angry with that lady but after informations started coming out, I know she knew what she was doing when odds turned against her.
Her family were in it too. If not, he would have paid pride price at least.

Spherical77:
avoid sex with her completely and study her ovulation period for some months. Having gotten it then you can have sex with her the very first day of her ovulation.

Whichever sex the child's turn out to be, just know that you are responsible for that and not your wife. Men spermatozoa is the sole determinant of child sex and not woman's egg

You are right.
To be on the safe side, not just the first day of her ovulation but when her ovary just released the egg. That is the koko. Sometimes women release egg from the two ovaries one after the other and they don't know except they have ovulation pain both sides for those who normally have that.

A member of my family had this problem. 3 girls and the man went rabid. I was very close to the wife and this lady tell me everything. I got to know about this through her. When she used kit the first time and it worked( bought her kit from Holland), she told everybody she knew about it who had the same problem and all got pregnant with baby boy. Alternativey, if you are sure of your ovulation, no need for kit, as soon as you release the egg, have sex immediately even if it's midnight.

Unconsciously because of cultural norms of some tribes, women try to be safe by following this rule as long as conception isn't the issue.

If conceiving ain't a problem, buy ovulation and sex selection kit. It's as costly as doing ivf.
A member of my family ordered for it from abroad. Monitored her ovulation and according to her, had to call hubby home from work at a particular time and that was how they got two boys.

From whati know, if your woman knows her ovulation time table very well, making love as soon as she releases egg gives a very higher percentage of male child. Scientifically proven and also endorsed by so many women.
So you two should study her cycle. If you can't, get help.

HacheNoire:
Is FFK not their father? Now you sounding like the mother is the parent?

You know my point, she knew who FFK was. I am not taking sides with FFK but I put blame on her. Why the sudden rants? You knew what FFK did to his previous wife but thought you will be special?

And now that all is on the board, you kinda acting victim and paying bloggers to get your predicaments to main stream.

If she can afford to get another sugar daddy, that will be great for her. What’s important is that she moves on.

When you dine with some certain class of powers, you will realize that the fact that you have dined with them before gives them that power to either make, break or end.

She knew all this….

All these kids.
Officially ffk isn't the father once dna is done. This is why he refused dna test. Surprising a woman is asking for a dna from her baby daddy.
He will lose those kids based on.
1. No sex between them. Very big accusation
2. He was very unwise not to pay pride price
3. He didn't do court marriage.
4. Woman claimed it was ivf with donor sperm hence requesting for dna. Ffk was not a smart man. He played into the hands of the lady like an idiot. No court of law will give him custody of those children after this in Abroad. But being Nigeria, anything goes. Her best bet is when the kids are of age and they will make their own decision. That the lady is opening up on social media is a foundation she is laying out for her children to follow through when the time comes.
(Ffk is 60something. Precious is a very young woman. Go figure)
And as young as they are, they know and see what's going on.
Making noise up and down is not smartness.
He guffed big time if not, he will not be disobeying court order everytime.

KanwuliaExtra:
At least you are free.
The boys will be fine.
Take heart.

The boys will know you tried. The world is your witness.

Watch and see what will happen to him.

What that lady need is patience. Those boys will eventually be hers on the long run.
Ffk already has age against him.
For how long will he continue to fight?
Children will follow their mama at age 18.
Man isn't the father, no pride price, no court marriage. Haba.

Person wey hold piking property, when hand begin pain am, he will give pikin his property back. Pikin has to exercise patience and wait.

Chicken is supposed to be very cheap but in naija, anything goes.

Even abroad beef is luxury.

At least, this affects everybody in ph. Politicians included.

Who is he
See name

Klinee:
Benin people should just track and kill this boborisky since our government is not doing anything about him.

This is one of the so called Nigerian youths. Killing is just normal in his eyes. And I share a country with this one

MufasaLion:
He's stingy but to his family, not outsiders. Learn to read to understand. I don't need to spoonfeed you before you comprehend. That doesn't make one occultic.

There are many people like that especially first born. It's painful but life goes on.

The man is who he is. You and the rest of your family should move on. Besides, is he the only one in your family?
Why can't you all help ur mum? They clip your hands to go out there and struggle.

Nobody owe anybody anything. Except your mum but as she has other kids, they should supplement.
As for chasing anything under the skirt, it's not your call but the wife. Learn to mind your business.
If the wife decides she has had enough, she can divorce him. Better still, why is she constrained, can't she make her own money?
Years of living with him she has not known how to steal his money to set herself up. Seems like you all so much depend on this guy that non of you want to think outside the box.
As nairaland has told you he is occultic, what next?

Thanksful:
His not educated. The slave master attitude he passed through during his business learning process is still affecting him.

Nothing diabolical about it.

He is someone that like to be praised and noticed. He like being on the spot light to cover up some deficiencies.

Which one is slave master attitude?
Who is the slave here?


What has that got to do with the way the said man behaves?

Maybe, you should go and learn more about slavery and how slaves are treated before you open your mouth next time.

Ethnic bigot.

Weak institutions breeds corruption.

Religion and ethnic division.


These 3 are the downfall of Nigeria.
Every other thing revolves around them.

What a hot topic
Though fictitious but very entertaining.
How am I to read almost 40 pages?

But the ones I managed to read so far so good.
Either u suport or don't with reasons.
That's how forums supposed be.
Kudos to everybody.

This generation of Nigerians ain't smiling I tell you

Still on 2nd page
Ops, not the other way round.


10k and somebody will kill you.

It will still come down to 5k


Sai baba.


As for the killing.
I have nothing to say. It's a daily occurance.

With the kind of hatred surrounding igbo people, they are still at the top.
Remove hatred and nobody will see their back.

Others should ask why igbos succeed where others fail?

There is always a blame B and C

Switch to plan B which is rushing to nearby good hospital. If labour can't be induced, plan C immediately which is CS.

Don't panic, OK?

AvalonSpace:
And you called her mother and reported. But your mother was supposed to know her diet and say "no" to the food being served. Forgive her and don't take it this far.

The man is deliberately looking for way to throw her out.
Who knows, they prophesied to him the wife is the cause of his mum's ill-health.

Mama don't have mouth again.
See pages upon pages of hatred oozing out from people. And we blame politicians when we are worst.