₦airaland Forum

youngpol:
And is this supposed to be funny?

Death wishes ain't funny oh. Remember those wishes came more from the state where ur school is located.

youngpol:
Same question my lecturer asked and the whole class kept very quiet. He answered it though, says Jonathan would continue his rule as if nothing happened since the he's the candidate with 2nd highest votes. I've silently been praying nobody gets any ideas and Buhari isn't nabbed before he's sworn in.

Sai Buhari.

U, ur lecturer, ur school and quiet class mates una dey Ado-Ekiti Polytechnic?

ozoigbondu:
This one is F.L.A.W.L.E.S.S V.I.C.T.O.R.Y.The good people of Rivers has shown that Judas of ubiama that he is nothing but an angry chinchua.No space for back stabbers in Niger Delta.

People of Rivers state we thank you for finally shutting that noisy generator up.

I wanted to click "Like" for your post, but felt u may not know how really I like ur post.

So I decided to Vociferously tell d OP that I love ur post very much!

Many thanks!

ednut1:
how many of you are guilty of this , i once lied about this, i was to resume on monday so i spent the entire sunday at my friends house so he could teach me, but on resumption day as i was being trained on some Pricing calculation for mining, i began to look for calculator, my oga was like when you have excel wat are u doing with that, there is no room for primitive pple here

lol. Sorry Op. It happened to me back in d days oh. This same Excel; was asked to plot graphs with provided sets of values.

Was not funny oh, but did very well in other aspects. The Salary offer was just 20k above what I was earning then but now in a more expensive city where 2 bedroom apartment cost twice more than where I was.

I turned it down off course. Ur post really got me laffing; shame on me. Infact, the German Woman so loved my performance in other tasks, she helped me in the excel challenge.

aniagoluaustin:
I'm a victim of this. It has turned a habit. I can't go to toilet without carry my phone, even if my phone is on 6% battery remaining...

And all because of nairaland

Please is it safe or hygienic?

lol. We many oh! And it reduces my sense of urgency to get out of the damn rest room.

I have felt so many times, exactly the way you do; but we are not alone. When you find the solution, please let me know

Big cheers!

aniagoluaustin:
I'm a victim of this. It has turned a habit. I can't go to toilet without carry my phone, even if my phone is on 6% battery remaining...

And all because of nairaland

Please is it safe or hygienic?

lol. We many oh! And it reduces my sense of urgency to get out of the damn rest room.

I have felt so many times, exactly the way you do; but we are not alone. When you find the solution, please let me know

Big cheers!

oyxah:
Well, you can't generalize because you've had experiences. Becaue the few you've met had such attitude doesn't mean everybody else behaves like that

I think you are right; my generalization was not really intentional.

I have had more professional interactions with Kogi Men than with their Women.

Infact I work indirectly under one who is a technical director, while two of them work under me and the working relationships have not been really exciting due to the reason I stated in my previous post.

So, please don't feel offended.

TheSonOfMark:
Spot on dude! Akwa-Ibom females aren't the hypocritical lot.

They are homely enough to make you the best meals and keep your home,


Then when in between the sheets, they are liberal enough to explore sexual fantasies with you.



Now tell me why anyone wouldn't want such ladies?



#iRepAkwaIbom #PromiseLand

Your descriptions are true, but they have one huge non-wife material problem.

It appears their culture does not frown at sex outside marriage. A short stay in that region will vindicate my claims.

I spent 1.6yrs there, but don't wanna go into details

oyxah:
Kogi

Kogi ke? You ain't seen nothing yet. Back in the days, My brother wife from Kogi go grind pepper pour her husband in the morning when he was dressed for work.

Infact, Kogi People (Women or Men) get serious anger management wahala.

I had One Oiza like that in the past, but the relationship never lasted. I just had to run when her quarrels and verbal threats became very discomforting.

Hope I have not offended anyone oh!

KidProgrammer:
Hi NLS..I write jamb and I made it.actually I choose economics and am thinking of switching to Geology..my combo are eng,math,eco,and geo...is it a good idea or I should just stick to my economics.....suggestions are welcomed.,,...........

I ain't so sure your subject combinations can give you Geology oh!

Chemistry and maybe Physics are core to reading Geology but may differ depending on the Institution.

Don't they produce JAMB brochure anymore?

cramjones:
Goodluck Jonathan has earned the dubious distinction of being the first president in Nigerian history to lose an election. In many ways, Jonathan was the architect of his own downfall. He made critical mistakes that turned the public and allies against him, and led them to gravitate towards the opposition. Here’s where it all went wrong:

1. Don’t cross the boss

When Nigeria emerged from 15 years of military rule in 1999, Jonathan’s Peoples Democratic party (PDP) was formed by wealthy retired generals to inherit power from the military. One of the godfathers was General Olusegun Obasanjo, who has governed Nigeria twice (between 1976-1979 and 1999-2007). Jonathan made the mistake of alienating Obasanjo; leading the general to write a public 18-page letter containing lacerating criticism of the president in December 2013. A party member likened Obasanjo’s hectoring of Jonathan to a father’s disappointment with his son.

Getting on the wrong side of Obasanjo is the political equivalent of crossing a mafia don
Rather than make peace with the 77-year-old, Jonathan’s office retaliated.

Getting on the wrong side of Obasanjo is the political equivalent of crossing a mafia don. You will pay. Obasanjo’s attacks on Jonathan intensified. In February, an irate Obasanjo quit the PDP and dramatically ripped up his party membership card on television.

Jonathan was naïve to think he could remain president without the support of PDP godfathers like Obasanjo. Although Nigeria is no longer under military rule, many retired millionaire generals call the shots from behind the scenes.

2. Playing fair
Previous Nigerian presidents were too cynical to expose themselves to the unpredictable risk of a fair election. The election victories of PDP presidents during the past 16 years have been partially “assisted” by electoral malpractice. That changed when Jonathan nominated Professor Attahiru Jega as the chairman of the Independent National Electoral Commission (Inec) in 2010. Jega vowed to reform Nigeria’s electoral process to ensure free and fair elections.

The former university lecturer exuded calm authority and integrity. He has painstakingly prepared for the task over the past four years by studying the rigging methods used in previous elections, implementing an elaborate system of voter registration, training thousands of electoral staff, and introducing biometric readers to identify voters by reading their thumbprint.

Jonathan created the environment for the emergence of these changes and gave Jega the freedom and authority to conduct reforms that led to a credible election. But by giving Jega a free hand to play fair, he allowed Jega to craft the weapons that were used to oust him from power.

3. Boko Haram and the Chibok kidnaps

Jonathan’s relations with party members at times resembled a football coach antagonising his star players
When Boko Haram kidnapped more than 200 schoolgirls from the town of Chibok in northern Nigeria, Jonathan failed to realise how much this would capture the public’s attention, both locally and internationally. His failure to speak about the kidnap for several weeks made him appear uncaring. These shortcomings were exacerbated by the behaviour of his wife, Patience, when she met the mothers of the kidnapped girls. Her ostentatious display and over-the-top emotions were mercilessly parodied.

Jonathan’s perceived casual indifference to the suffering of his people was compounded when he was photographed celebrating his niece’s lavish wedding just a few days after Boko Haram had killed 2,000 people in the town of Baga.

4. Bad management

Jonathan’s relations with party members at times resembled a football coach antagonising his star players into leaving for rival teams. His tendency to fall out with colleagues simultaneously weakened his party and strengthened the opposition. He quarrelled with one after another; leading several of them to leave the party in frustration and join the opposition All Progressives Congress (APC). The alliance between these and the opposition shoved Jonathan out of power.

5. Corruption and cronyism
Nigerians refer to their country’s resources as the “national cake” which must be shared by its citizens. There was a perception that Jonathan gave slices of the cake largely to members of his own community. Many powerful members of his government were from Jonathan’s region in the deep south of the country. Even Jonathan’s wife was appointed as a senior civil servant in his home state of Bayelsa.

There was a perception that Jonathan gave slices of the cake largely to members of his own community
Under Jonathan’s presidency many militant leaders from the oil producing Niger Delta area in the south have become very rich from government patronage and contracts. Some of them have been awarded security contracts to guard the oil installations they once protested against and attacked.

Jonathan has also pardoned a former ally accused of fraud and money laundering, increasing the cloud of suspicion hanging over his government.

These events caused deep resentment in other parts of Nigeria and created the impression that Jonathan ran a government that benefits those from his part of the country, the south, but not many others.

Jonathan even managed to get into a public feud with the governor of the Central Bank of Nigeria, the respected Sanusi Lamido Sanusi. In February 2014 Sanusi alleged that $20bn of Nigerian oil revenue was unaccounted for. Rather than investigating the claims Jonathan fired Sanusi for his impertinence at publicly hinting of government fraud.

Buhari’s victory is historic and unprecedented. However Jonathan was responsible almost as much as Buhari was.

Sorry for my impatience, only read number 1point.

Who was Obasanjor before 1999? Remember the giraffe neck fellow who wanted the job of UN secretary general? who was even jailed sef.

Which influence he get? I be wan type something about the Yorubas, but I have never been a bigot in my life.

I love my University though, it's in Ibadan

MuguliciousMUGU:
APC supporters commenced a PDP burial procession from Tudun Wada area of Kaduna this morning at about11am. They are heading to Murtala square. While the euphoric activity has been generally peaceful, they did harass a few motorists on the Western Bypass which is on their route.
Kaduna is known to be GMB's base so we expect this jubilation to continue throughout the week.

http://lindaikeji..in/2015/04/photos-pdp-burial-procession-in-kaduna.html

Chai, there is God oooo...

I so stared at my computer screen, not knowing what to type really, in reaction to these pictures.

I really hope Nigeria is not descending into pre-civilization age before I begin to regret why I got civilized ( for lack of a better word).

bushdoc9919:
No of voters....31 746 490

AA: 42125

ACPN: 40311

AD: 30673

ADC: 39666

APA: 53537

APC: 15,424,921

CPP: 36,300

HOPE: 7,435

KOWA: 13,076

NCP: 24,455

PDP: 12,853,162

PPN: 24,475

UDP: 9208

UPP:18,220

Total 28,587,564.

rejected votes : 844,519.

Total cast: 29,432,083

Wow, so more than 13 million Nigerians who voted, didn't want Buhari as President.

Quite a fractious entity called NIgErIA!

AbuMikey:
That Prof used more light than what Oga Jonah gave us in 6 years, He still dinor see shît

Very analytical, Very critical and very intelligently presented. But I do not think the Prof. faked it.

I have had, and still have Old People ( including Professors) with such reading difficulty.

I am being very honest.

dlex21:
Sai baba

lol. We really know how to create fun out of our frustrations.

I love the person who took the shot, but not necessarily you who wan kill yaself over Wetin?

Very disturbing pictures really! But in truth, where does the problem really lie?; in Nigeria or Nigerians?

How could the so called civilized Nigerians who can afford flight tickets be this ridiculous? standing on an Airplane? even those who are seated but not complaining are worse off.

Sometimes, I am unruffled when the global narratives about Nigeria are not encouraging; cos truth dey inside small.

ammyluv2002:
She's cool but this her dressing sha

No, She is not.

In truth, with all due respect to all big ladies; d romantic delusion and pretence don't last too long.

But plenty respect though to Men Who fool all of us, that all is fine.

Why are big size ladies so desperate to prove that they are as good as anyone else? if not even better?

I beg, Wetin bring me here self?

Am impressed by your post. But first, I know it is still dry up there. Quite evident from your soil conditions; how do you provide moisture?

Is there any form of mechanization in place to enable you cultivate more land area with huge reduction in drudgery?

Agriculture actually is a Science and without the mastery of the Science and Tech in it, may just be a futile fantasy. ( There maybe no difference btw you and our Parents).

Your Onions and Cabbage need specific Agro-inputs to have a successful productivity statistics. Have you taken care of these? So you don't run away next season?

I encourage you to join this group for technical and capacity building support: FARA( Forum for Agricultural Research in Africa).

By the way, I hope you have sold your onions and cabbage before going into this cultivation? They say, find the buyer before you produce.

Goodluck!

NB.
Sorry Sir, may I add more? Your land preparation method is not quite encouraging. It seems u swept the surface with APC brooms. (lol.). That was not necessary.

You need debris, dead leaves and twigs to provide much needed organic matter and to also retain moisture from your wetting effort in addition to keeping weeds away.

Ayam sorry for all the criticism!

Blackbeauty:
See how u just want to buy wahala!I was using an iphone 5 I got as a gift which I had to sell!I laugh at you in greek if after all I wil say,you still decide to get the 5s!.I'll start with the pros-1.it is a small cute phone.I love the design and size.
2.It is an overhyped and annoyingly overpriced phone which makes it command respect.You can't see jst anyone using it.when u are out and people will be like 'wow,you use an iphone?' And u say 'yep'( with u smiling internally),that's as good as it gets!
Cons-
1.You can't use bluetooth.you hear a nice song playing or u intend getting a picture.brother,you can't use bluetooth o!except its a transfer from iphone to iphone.now how many people wwud own an iphone where u work or sch?
2.You can't download songs,videos,pdf files...in fact anything from d internet.yes..so if u love free music don't bother!I remember I had to buy ed sheeran's bloodstream and thinking out loud songs from itunes for like 400 naira after d naira got devalued.the frustration I felt that day eh!
3.when u buy it,u can't just add your favourite songs o..u need the itunes app on ur pc to sync the songs into ur phone..if u r foolish enough to give it to slot guys to add songs for u,that's ur doom.The day u get your own itunes app on ur pc,all the previous songs and videos not synced with ur apple I'd will be wiped!
4.The appstore is the crappiest av seen after that of windows os..for files over 100mb,you wud need wifi or no download!you must upgrade to the latest ios 8 or you can't download some apps!once you are on ios 8,you can't downgrade it or jailbreak ur iphone!you see?
5.Many of the fun stuffs on it are better enjoyed in u.s eg hv u seen someone using imessage in nigeria?nada!
There are many more cons in buying an iphone..bt let me stop here!now the decision is yours to make.

Wow! All these wahala? And I am expecting one, this coming Easter from a Friend in d UK.

Don't know what to feel now, but thanks. At least, this info came from Who had used it.

lol

Ludicrous!

Wanna generate invoice and pay acceptance fee?

go to: www.pgschool.ui.edu.ng. click on the pop up link. pls don't use Internet explorer, Opera works wella.

Good luck!

jasper7:
My broda, keep me updated on your start up o. I like to hear success stories. Will you be selling fresh or you plan to process?

Process into wetin really? Find the market before production.

So when last did your Governor order your Cucumber, after this showmanship?

studio14:
Na train be that??

I was bemused!

temitemi1:
FFK, FAYOSE n apc . Abeg apc pple help me do this little maths, 10,000-1,000000=. Wetin be d answer abeg . GEJ till u find answer to this question!!

- 990000

Vig86:
If you are a man that hates seeing your girlfriend having a close hug with men you have to marry an Nsukka girl for 100% fidelity.

This id how it works:

* Single ladies can flirt with any man they like both married and single men but once they(ladies) are married it is over. The very "car" can never go to any other mechanic except the family mechanic (husband).

* Married men can sleep with any single lady except married ones. Married people from Nsukka can not sleep with any married woman even if the woman is from Congo and married to French man.

* Single men can sleep with any girl all over the world since the girl is not married. Single men can never sleep with married women irrespective of where she is from.

* Married Women sleep with their husbands ONLY.
The punishment for offenders ranges from DEATH to MADNESS. It is our culture and I love that. Some people say it is harsh but why should you sleep with another man when you are married. I am a christian but I strictly believe in this culture.

I encourage every potential suitor that is looking for a happy home to come and get hold of our beautiful girls. If you are tired of suspecting your girl friend then it is time to let go and have a suspicion-free marriage.
IT IS NOT EVERY PART IN NSUKKA THAT PRACTISE THIS.

All the things u wrote about Nsukka Girls are not true. l lived in New Aglican Road, by Chidubem hospital junction. Their Women (married or single) enjoy sex and alcohol. Especially if u r "onye ugbo" (foreigner)

emusmith:
Sometimes we forget to check up on my parents because we are "too busy". Take a few minutes today and call your parents.
Perhaps, do it now!
No more procrastination!

God bless u, just called my Mom. Though I call her often, but u just made me call her now. She is doing very well at old age. Many thanks

kestolove95:
Igbo. Goats

Lol. U nor well oh!. lol. again.

jackbennie:
seeds

Ok, Kool. How much of it do you have? And was it produced with organic inputs?(Very crucial, because there will be Phytochemical Analysis) to ascertain absence or minimal presence of noxious compounds.

2,500/kilo of what? Dry leaves or Seeds?

How many tonnes of d indicated parts do u have? was it organically produced?

Please post answers here or send answers to. b.ijeoma@intercedd.com

Thanks

Center for Petroleum, Energy Economics and Law( University of Ibadan)- N800,000/session

pecothecash:
Dis message is for adults only........ FOR THE
SAKE OF SAFE SEX NAFDAC has introduced a
protection cream inplace of condom. Its safe,
affordable and comfortable. MoreOver, there
wil
be no need to use condom again.The advantage
of using this cream is that you can now enjoy
flesh to flesh sex without the fear of HIV/
AIDS.At last we can now enjoy skin to skin.Go to
any pharmacy close to you and request 4 #
Aboniki BALM. Lol"

Is it "Aboniki Balm for Safe Sex"? or just "Aboniki BALM"? looool. My Pharmacist was Confused.