essentialone: There is and you have done it before
There is nothing like that. You expend your energy and fluid. She lies there with her leg open, her ass raised to receive you. Can assure you she enjoyed it way more than you did. But who looses, you. You loose, energy, time, fluid, protein and money. There is nothing like bleeping mercilessly!
Attracted to who or what? Am too old for that my child. Please look at face before writing outside point. Nothing wrong with seeing more pictures. If it's really a man, which it's not. The transformation is outstanding.
essentialone: I had a friend who did it. I will keep out the name of the lady and the State where it happened. But this is not fairytale. All the 'Elders' were arranged. None were real. The guy bleeped the girl mercilessly even when she was pregnant. Until her tummy came out very well, then he told her the truth that he did it just because she was forming hard to get, and relocated. If you doubt me, it happened in Rivers State. Enough said.
That's what you get when you marry all these slay queens. It's just like looking for wife and going to jam Tonto dike. No be evil sprit you go find? Someone like Churchill can't handle that person na just like this guy can't handle this one he married. Only person that could handle this woman is probably the a mad person of the same shameless breed as that of the last guy Tonto married that dealt with her.
NairaOcean: In the viral video, a Nigerian soldier has captured the internet's attention with a humorous yet poignant video addressing infidelity. The video, featuring the soldiers in their uniforms, shares across various platforms.
In the clip, the soldier poses a rhetorical question that has struck a chord with many viewers: "If woman can cheat on soldiers with bombs and guns...who be you wey dey carry laptop and pen?"
jesusjnr2020: Why Do Armed Robbers, Cultists, Witches, Demons, Fear Some Christians But Not All?
I remember when a church leader narrated his ordeal with armed robbers, after he traveled from Port-harcourt all the way to Benin city to attend a church program at the headquarters of Church of God Mission, and was also sent in the process to deliver some gifts to Benson Idahosa (late church founder when he was still alive) by members of the church in Rivers state.
He said the robbers stole everything he had, including the bag containing his own clothes, but left every single item they saw that was addressed to Benson Idahosa.
He was shocked that the armed robbers were not afraid to rob him of everything he had, except anything that belong to Benson Idahosa.
Just the name of Benson Idahosa inscribed on the gifts alone seemed to strike fear into the hearts of the armed robbers that they dare not tamper with them, even though they were merely gift items sent by his church members (of another state) which he may never have heard of or even had any idea of their gifts by then.
Although the poor man himself may have heard several mind-blowing stories about Benson Idahosa prior to that, however this particular one was now drawn from his own bitter experience, as he didn't have any other clothes to wear for the program he traveled all the way for except that on his body, but for Benson Idahosa who helped him with some, after he had delivered the said gifts and also narrated his ordeal to him.
While with Benson Idahosa, and yet recovering from the shock of his ordeal, he must have wondered what it was about the man before him, that distinguished him before armed robbers, to the extent they were so afraid of touching the man's things but not his, despite also being a Christian himself.
Interesting15: In a previous post (https://www.nairaland.com/8096971/getting-correct-lady-say-yes) where I, amongst other things, drew a portrait of who a correct lady is, I emphasized the fact that marriage is one of God's core strategies to empower us to become all He has destined us to be with great ease. In other words, you are primarily aiming to marry a member of the opposite gender not for sex or childbearing or companionship sake, but the most important thing is that they have the configuration to play a unique and pivotal role in helping you fulfill destiny (becoming all God has destined you to be) with great ease.
Now, as a lady, if you want to enjoy the full dividends of marriage with peace of mind, you have to go the bible way (God's way) and not as dictated by imperfect societal standards and opinions. This means you have to be patient with God to bless you with a man who has the configurations to help you fulfill destiny and must not agree to marry a random guy just because of physical considerations (money, height, complexion, etc).
I want you to remember this, like Eve, if God will lead you to a correct guy who can help you navigate your journeys in destiny, you must also be a correct lady who can be an adequate helper to him too. To attract a correct man, you must be a correct lady too. And to have such a configuration, you must be genuinely saved, submitted to the Holy Spirit, and have started running with destiny.
I explained all these in full detail in my books "Getting A Correct Lady To Say Yes To Your Marriage Proposal" and "Getting A Correct Guy To Propose Marriage To You".
In the context of our conversations here (about marriage), a correct guy is a male God has configured to help you fulfill your destiny as your husband. He is not only saved (submitted to the Lordship of Jesus and the government of the Holy Spirit), but is already running with destiny even as a single guy. A guy who is useful and beneficial to God his Creator will translate into a quality husband for you.
DMerciful: This is a lame argument you people refused to recover from because you wanna push Igbo hate.
Firstly, he stayed in power for 5months and unify the civil service 45 days before he was assassinated. If Nigeria did not want that policy, who enforced it after he was killed? Why did the new government not repeal the decree?
Secondly, when Ironsi was killed, it was still 4 regions renamed as 4 states. Why did Gowon divide the 4 states to 12 states making it impossible to reverse?
Yep you are right. But looking at it from another perspective. IBB was within the sphere of authority for ages, why it was easy for him to take power. Then he retired most of his seniors and mates to make sure no one senior enough to remove him. But he knew what we didn't know. He knew Ironsi well enough, why did they kill him? These questions need answers by those that were there. The atmosphere of the time, the ideology no one has ever portrayed it well in any books so far. They shouldn't let those information die with them.
Yep, IBB many others were there the whole time. They should tell of the truth of what transpired, what caused the war. The truth not all those BS they used to sell books. We need the truth for historic reasons.
Lukmanraji: My gf of seven years has been giving me attitude recently which I noticed sometimes last year. I observed that she always check my phone to look for something to hold against me. Yes, she suspected that I'm having something with someone. So, every time she's around me, she always find one or two thing that will lead to argument and all that. Aside that, the respect, love and intimacy between us reduced drastically.
Fast forward to this year, She successfully read a chat on my phone where I was talking dirty with someone. That's the genesis of the whole mess I'm in right now. She just walked out quietly and decided to end it all. Since then, I've not been myself because this is the person I have planned to live the rest of my life with. So, I started begging her but she's not giving me any green light. I called, messaged her but no response. I asked my Junior brother to beg on my behalf but she didn't succumb to that not until my dad intervened to apologize on my behalf.
So, she call me that we need to see. I rushed to visit her and apologize again and again. She agreed to continue with the relationship but she hasn't forgiven me. After few weeks of the whole issue. I suspected that she's hiding something from me. Then one fateful night, I spy on her phone when she was unlocking her phone. That night, I was able to access her phone while she was asleep.
I checked her WhatsApp, I discovered that she has been clearing her chat with one particular guy who happens to be her friend from NYSC since 2021. They became close as they both work in the same financial institution but in a different branch. Then I went further to her Instagram page to see what's going there.
To my greatest surprise, I discovered that they have been having an affair since 2023. My gf has been throwing herself to this guy, they have been going to the cinema together and other places. On her birthday, my babe and this guy went out together without my knowledge, they both book uber to somewhere without my knowledge, they were both sharing their feelings online, talking about marriage, how to raise their kids irrespective of their religion differences and my babe even throwing herself to the guy for sex. Everything thing I found in their chat especially how my babe has been treating this guy with love and respect is the opposite of how my babe has been treating me lately.
So, I screenshoted all the evidence and save on my phone. I then challenged her that she's cheating on me with that guy but she blatantly denied it. Not until I showed her all the evidences with me before she began to cry fowl and started debunking all I saw. She claimed that they are not true, they were just playing and not into any thing serious. They are friends and that's how they banter each other online. All her excuses were not genuine but I still forgive her on one condition that I don't want to see her with the guy again and she should cut off any form of friendship or relationship between them because I had done something more than that to her just recently and she forgive me.
Meanwhile, during the cause of this issue, I proposed to my gf that we should take this relationship to the next level by seeing her parents this year and maybe by the end of the year, we do the whole thing. The shock response I got from her was that she's not in a rush to settle down with me. Not even this year as she's just healing from the heartbreak I caused her and I can't use marriage to tie her down then I continue breaking her heart. There's no how I tried convincing her that I am a changed man now as I am ready to take responsibility and be a responsible person.
After few weeks, I logged into her whatsapp on my system and then again I found out that she's still talking to this guy and they were even planning on going out again. I got angry and send proof to her but guess what, my babe para for me for cloning her whatsapp on my system. Hell almost let lose that evening. This time around, she felt unapologetic about the primary issue that I warned her to desist from. Funny enough, after close observation, I learnt that they move their chats from whatsapp to Snapchat where their chat is just "view once". Then I knew that this lady is not ready to stop talking to this guy. I have shouted over and over this matter but this time around, my babe is now feeling lackadaisical about this issue.
Right now, my babe is now comfortable with the guy and she's now sitting on defense about this matter. In our last conversation, my GF literarily told me that she doesn't love me anymore. And then she started rewinding all my past during the cause of the relation and using it as an excuse for not been able to love me like she used to. In our conversation, the only thing she didn't mention is that we should go on our separate ways (break up) but everything she said to me indirectly simply means that she is done with me.
I felt unloved as this is the woman I never placed anyone above, this is the woman I've nurtured when we were in school and outside school. I respected her and love her so much that she has become part of me. My parents, family and friends are expecting us to tie the knot soon but here is my babe telling me she's not in love with me anymore. I felt unloved about this whole thing and I'm heartbroken.
I am lost and crying inside silently as I never expected someone I have sacrificed something huge for before to be acting like this to me. I'm depressed. I need mature advise from you guys. Thank you.
Mata has ended already. What are we supposed to do again here?
Obesity: I have something bothering me and I don't know if it's right. My guy is presently not in the country. He is in Ghana and I am in nigeria working. He has introduced me to his mother and the mother accepts me. I am working but there is something the mother is doing that I don't like. In December last year she sent me a list of things to buy for her. She wrote two bags of rice. One for her and one for her sister. Provisions and 5 cartons of noodles and a cash of 50k to buy her Christmas clothes.
So I asked her if the list is for her son, and she said her son doesn't have money yet, that I should buy them. For peace to reign o, I bought the things for her. Something I did not even do for my own mother, I was doing it for another woman. Later again around February she requested for 200k to start palm oil business.
When I told her I don't have, she should ask her son and she said, hope I know my fate is in her hand. That she has the power to make her son not to marry me again. So I sent the money to her. A month later again, she told me her daughter's phone was stolen and that she needs to buy a new phone. So I sent 50k to her and she said the money is not enough that she is using phone of 250k. That I should send extra 200k to her.
And that was when I said no. Enough. I told my fiancée about it and he said does it mean I will not take care of his family when he marries me? I had to tell him that I don't have such amount of money they are demanding. I only earn 80k from my work. And his family is trying to exhaust my savings. I don't have. And he said I should look for a way to give the sister the remaining 200k or I should forget about the marriage.
I have been crying since he told me this. I don't have 200k with me. The only money in my savings is 102K. I don't know what to do. He is so serious about breaking up with me, if I don't give the sister the money.
Help me I need advice on how to solve this. I am afraid of losing him.
Your village people are in control here. Use your tongue to count your teeth, maybe when you are done. You will see the hand writing on the wall. Those people are using you, be wise. A man that wants to marry you will be the one wanting to give you, even if he doesn't have.
rexbuton: Please this topic wants to tear the family apart.
We are doing well, each of us earns almost 85k per year, I'm in IT, she's in healthcare, and we both work full-time. I am a Christian, I have never defaulted in tithing in the last 5 years. Not once. She says tithing is my personal 'problem'. She uses the word problem specifically. She doesn't pay tithe.
This is the present sharing agreement, I bring 70%, she brings 30%. This 70-30 covers the cost of living, groceries, nursery fees for our baby, and other bills. before this sharing, we both bring equal amounts for the house mortgage and the car. When her family needs money, she insists that we share it 50-50 based on her culture.
For my cybersecurity certifications, I pay from my less than 20%, but I have never complained. God has been faithful. My belief is that my tithe covers for the family. The good news is that I won a large sum of money from my savings, tens of thousands of dollars. I intend to pay tithe, and channel most of the money to my professional development so I can earn more. I don't think I deserve that money I won, that money was from God. She thinks otherwise.
What's your opinion?
Lol, I see lots of loopholes in your arrangement. And I agree with the ideology that tithing is a personal thing. If I might add, the correct way to have paid it was a percentage of the family's total income. Which would mean that your family is not paying enough. I won't add anymore there, but to say it's your decision. And to add that as an adult your tithe doesn't cover her. That out of the way, then my critic below.
One can see that though you are trying your damnedest, but you still seem to be financially irresponsible. You place yourself in a scenery where you are almost out of cash at months end without much savings for a rainer day. That would prove catastrophic if your better half is not one to spring to action if you are financially incapable to do somethings. You are setting yourself up for a dangerous predicament. Women regardless of how in love they are or family orientated are not built like men. When push comes to shove many of them tend to start cracking at the seams.
My advice: Set up a family account where funds from both earners go into this account. This account would be responsible for running the family and all other family accrued expenditure. This account should cover schooling for the children, clothes and holidays. Everything you do as a family. The rent too, everything. My suggestion wouldn't have been 70/30 sharing but 50/50. Reason being that you also have to pay 50/50 to her family. I mean, why would madam expect you to pay 70/30 for family and then 50/50 for financial aid? Why won't she take up the heavy lifting when it come to help her family? She is being selfish, am sorry to have to state this, but it's clear in your writing. Once you are able to clear areas where you are leaking funds, you will see that you will have more funds in your arsenal. The excess funds you can direct as the spirit directs and to upgrade yourself. As your personal funds are right now you don't have any right to complain or fight your wife about it. You set that up yourself, on your own. You need to change that. Make all payments equal and also the decision making. If your intent for paying more was due to your wanting to be the man. Then make it more reasonable like for example 55/45 as 70/30 for people earning almost similar is too irresponsible
DaddyCoool: Close. NOT full-fledged wedding with live band and "abroad guy"!
Also you can be sure it is fake because 99.99% of such stories on Nairalander are fake or embelished - to make FP. Almost nobody doing such tells the absolute truth.
On NL if a story seems possibly fake or embelished you can be 100% sure it is
Abroad guy, friend of a friend. Did full fledged trad with live band. Family and friends and even bought brand new car (we latter learned the car was borrowed / leased) as wedding present. Lady was destroyed.
DaddyCoool: How on earth have you hurt a girl by spending all your time and money on marriage ceremony just for sex? SEX! Same sex she fully enjoyed as much as you, and also enjoy with others 4 free!
Yep, now you get the point. That is the irony of it all.
Odebayo4010: My Experience working in a Hotel as a receptionist Open my eye to unimaginable things. So Many things that will make you scared. Working in a hotel will turn you to something else. Avoid it if you can.
Things dey happen there, Especially married women what they're doing they maval, I done hear different sound track I swear, both from married woman and singles. You will see how dey slàughter people's serious girlfriends.
Working at a lodge will make you fear marriage self.
Chai omo I done day fear women like this, many things day happen ooh, imagine both married women ooh, omo if no be to get children I for no near woman say I won marry Especially married women with small small boys. One of them like me and wanted me to be her boyfriend and I refuse, she was angry and stop coming to the hotel.. To marry go hard o.
I have once catch my neighbor wife but I forgot to snap her for evidence. Without an evidence, I decided to keep quiet . This man loves this lady dīe. Come see gift he will pack come back while coming for holiday from work
That's is why I always say cheating is not gender based to confirm, just go to any hotel or guest house to relax or watch ball, u will see many married women coming for short time, many even stay over night, have seen a Soo called men and women of God come to hotel to do short time.
Some times is good to go out especially to some places to see dat dere is nothing in this life and u will appreciate the fact that you need to love your self more than any other person.
For men dat carry dere wives for head, I love my wife I love my wife, you wife dey hotel to do short time with another man, make everyone get sense and trust nobody. Continue later, I wanted to rest for now.
Nothing to learn here guys. Just BS yearns from a frustrated teen
JB0707: My husband and I both live in the uk and we join all our money and investments together, all the properties my husband acquired in Nigeria doesn’t have my name on it, at first I wasn’t bothered but now i am bothered because his family is chaotic. I started asking for my name to be included and i am not ok with the response am getting. I feel i am just working and I have nothing in my name. I love him but I don’t trust his family. Should i keep insisting or start my investment separately. I am just confused
You should know the man you married. Is he a reasonable man? Can you speak with him, will he understand? If Al these are true, then speak with him. Make him see your reason cos you can't be working and financing things that you wouldn't get returns from. Yes, it's for you both bit if your money was also involved, then speak with him and have it changed.. If on the other hand, Oga refuses to bulge. Then let him explain his reasons to you. I doubt there will be any sane reason that would explain why your name was omitted (let's say it wasn't a mistake). But there would definitely not be a sane reason to explain why it can't be changed or why your name can't be added. If there are not changes, then you need to start making your own investments outside those you have done with your husband. Bear it mind that you need to thread carefully or your union might not survive.
grommet: I have tend to notice that the nigerian community “abroad” is toxic. People are just filled with too much gossip, people also try to one up you, you wonder if they are your friends. Some come to your personal life and after its a mess as they come with a wave of drama to it.
Sometimes its annoying being in those spaces because its all about ‘this guy’s wife sleeping with different men who are sleeping with different girls and so on and so forth. It’s kind of annoying
Has anyone noticed this? Thoughts
Lol, if you know you know. Only novices don't know how to use their tongues to count their teeth
She wanted me to deflower her and I refused. I told her to keep her virginity till she gets married since she has managed to keep the virginity for more than 22 years. She got angry, ended the relationship and blocked me on all communication channels till date. It happened in the year 2020.
Tomorrow, she may join some ladies to shout, "All men want is sex".
Should have done the deed. As long as there is mutual respect, all is good
Please don't crucify me yet, just advise me please. Had to utilize a new moniker for this.
I got married last year June and by February 2024, I was transferred to another state for work. I was bored in the city and probably made a mistake. The girl stays in same hotel, and works for a bank, also on a course. So we started talking and one thing led to another. This girl had her phone on audio record the two times we got down and recorded all the audio of the shit we did.
My wife came visiting and of course I defined boundaries the moment wifey was around. A few days back I got high and dozed off, my wife got into my phone saw our chats. Her last chat to me, was regarding the audio. My wife followed through the convo and she sent two 24 minute audios.
Before I could wake, Wifey was already gone from the hotel. And when I checked my phone I saw a long epistle and screen shots of what happened. Now she has called my entire family, friends everybody I know. I am so ashamed of myself.
Is there anything I can do to have her back. Can she ever forgive me.
I feel so bad having betrayed her.
Madam no dey play. She has completely destroyed your personality, your person and your ability to ever recover from this. You will have to leave with the shame of people seeing you and pointing "that shameless man sleeps with young girls". Life is hard. If you've turned a new leave and intend to repent. Then be the adult and clear the air with everyone she has spoken to about this issue. Call family and try to make amends. If you married her traditionally too then that's the way to go. Your people will know what to do. But if you have really repented, then you have to learn to not think with your rod but your head. Then one would ask about how come you already started cheating after only a few weeks of marriage? Don't you have control? Still the trust would have lots of problems and wifey will never forget it, forgive is another issue
Racoon: The citizens are really funny. Admiring a beautiful lady that spoke out against the lawless of soldiers in fueling the fuel scarcity of 1984. Meanwhile, have the situation changed 30 years thereafter? Absolutely no!
The speaking ought to have been more louder now with more affirmative action, but most have leagued with their corrupt oppressors. Ask the chalartan Occupy and Save Nigeria groups of 2012 - 14.
I doubt thats a good way to see it. This is probably distraction mechanism from the governing branch now. Allows them control the narrative, just like Roman emperor's were doing with the colosseum.
Darevofpeace: Although I consider this question a dumb one, I’ll share my considerations. Sex is primarily an instinctive indulgence, and I’m sure goats don’t watch porn to know what to do during sex; chimpanzees and dogs don’t either. It’s like a baby’s first walking steps; it is instinctive—a response to nature’s design.
Humans are born with a sexual primal instinct that calls us to act in a certain way during sexual intercourse. I have heard foxes moan while mating, and it’ll be dimwitted to suggest that it’s a learned behavior. It is nature, just like it is natural to cry when beaten. The summary of my point is that if two virgins get married, they will, to a great extent, know what to do. They’ll know what’s pleasing, what’s painful, what feels good, what should be repeated.
Who taught humans what sex styles are? NOBODY! It’s the instinctive obsession to pleasure that invents even more pleasurable sexual methods. Sex styles must have been as old as mankind, but its labeling and popularity was aided by porn. Porn didn’t invent sex styles; nature did. It is important that intending couples know basic things about their sexual organs, but this should never be taught using pornography. Pornography is a skewed and corrupt imagery of sex. It is everything sex and intimacy is not! It is a bad example.
As Christians, it’s an abomination. Justifying watching porn as a married couple is like learning how to please God from Satan. Your marriage is holy; why involve unholy things? I appreciate the liberty married couples have in marriage, but it’s still subject to holiness. Humans don’t need porn for a fulfilling sexual life in marriage. The primal instinct aided by communication during intimacy is enough for pleasure your partner. Porn is unattainable—60 minutes nonstop thrusting; the perfect bodies and 10 inches joysticks are unreal.
I started work for this organization in December last year and I am heading my department. A new manager, a female was brought in January from a different state as the overall head. It wasn't easy for her as a lot of junior staff fought against her decisions. I was her go to person even though there are other people heading various departments. As time went on, some junior and senior members of the organization began to disassociate from her. This made us come more closer. We hug each other every morning on resumption of duty, she visits my office, eat there if she came with food and most times, will sleep on my office. She is always jealous whenever she sees me holding other female colleagues. I don't go beyond the hugging because she is married and I respect her marriage. Even the hugging, I don't hug in the front, but at the side. With time, she was able to push a lot of junior staffs away and new ones were employed. One of the new guy employed last month, knows the game to unlocking women's leg. Within last month and this month, he has slept with almost all the girls in the organization and even the girls I usually play left me, both the one that has visited me in my house although, we didn't do anything. Some weeks ago, he began coming close to the overall manager, and the woman, started developing emotions for him and becomebtoo attracted to him. Last week, I and the guy were having some good time then she appeared, came to the chair where I sat and looked straight into the guys eyes. I caught her, and she became uncomfortable. She left my office and then closed work after 5 mins even though it wasn't her closing time. She lives with her husband and I do go to visit them. I never knew I had feelings for her all these while until that particular act happened. Well, after that act, I restrained her from coming to my office. She came begging me. She asked me what was wrong. I couldn't tell her because she is married but i was dying. She even asked me if i am in love with her but i kept mum. Two days ago, I was with her in her office when she heard the guy's voice and how the other women are happy, chanting and laughing. Immediately, she became uncomfortable and after 5 mins, she told me that she was coming and left. 10 minutes later, I went out and caught she and the guy in a happy mood. I became very angry and hurt, the only friend I had was gone. Yesterday, I called her to her office and asked her if she loves the guy. She was furious but I continued by pointing out all that I have observed about her and the guy. She became cold, and her countenance changed. After i left her office, she sat there without stepping out the whole day except the time she closed for the day.
I don't know if it was wrong to have told her about the guy since I'm not the husband.
As it stands now, I've decided to cut close ties with her as I know clearly, the guy has won.
Before she went home yesterday, I went into her office and noticed that she was crying and then, her hand shaking. I asked her why was she crying and why is her hand shaking. She did not say anything, so I told her to do what's on her mind, because I know clearly that that I've lost her.
Ever since yesterday, I've been feeling jealousy towards them.
She didn't come to work today but I'm worried about her, me and the guy tomorrow.
Romance › Re: Guys Fake Marriage Just To Sleep With Hard-to-get Ladies. Share Your Experience by drnoel: 9:49pm On May 29, 2024
