₦airaland Forum

Nonsense youths and Christians. You boo them yet they still rule over you and destroy the nation. Our voice is only on social media. Run for office, we won't. Participate in elections, we won't. We will keep giving excuses of "they have rigged it already" to be cowards. Keep booing o. 2023 is here, he will still be the representative while you are wasting your shout and data. Nonsense!!!

Use Tranazenic Acit. My wife had a bleeding issue for a while too after her menstrual cycle. Use the injection or tablet. A sachet cost maybe N1,500

To the woman:

Your problem as the woman is that you love money. I also sense you aren't a believer/disciple (what you people refer to as "Christian". When you married that man, you agreed to submit your life, plus all you own to him. That includes your money. You people never had any counsel before marriage. Marriage makes you one with your spouse. So there's nothing like your money, my money.

Whether you earn more than him or not is not the matter. What of you lost that job tomorrow, will all your bragging about money not end? Divorce is not because of money, it's because you lack wisdom, knowledge and understanding of how marriage works by God's standard. Continue to claim your money o. When that job eventually goes, we will probably see what's left for you. Or, get wisdom and understanding and follow God's word and prove Him if your marriage won't work.

To the man:
Haba Oga, calm down now. That you are the head of the house doesn't make you a tyrant. Don't punch above your weight. I sense the reason your wife is denying you money (even though wrong) is because she doesn't see wisdom in how you manage such funds or she hasn't seen an investing husband. You're probably engaging in projects for show. Then, you resort to emotional abuse because of money? Wow! That's terrible. You have a serious problem with loving money. Don't compete with your wife. Complement her. Help her grow. Take interest in what she does. Encourage her. Women are flowers. They blossom when they are watered. You may not be earning as much, but encourage her. Tell her she's doing well, but not for patronage. If there's an idea you have, discuss with her, but don't make it mandatory she must being her money. God is always faithful. If that idea is from God, He will bring funding for it with or without your wife. But don't makae money just to show her you are capable. You guys are already in a toxic relationship and you need the word of God. In time, believe me she'll come around, but you may still never earn as she does.
You are the head of the home. Set boundaries according to God's word and lead your home right. But let God lead you. Don't ask your wife for Money, but there must be transparency in all you guys spend or make. There must always be agreement in how the money must be spent too. Request that.

To you both:
You need wisdom, not more money. You need knowledge and understanding too and you'll find it in God's word. Read good books too.

I hope they build and finish the industries first because if it's 7 floor houses the want to build, it's a waste. Ask Akpabio. Four points Sheraton at Ikot Ekpene, tropicana are more like waste. Uyo doesn't have the economy nor population to sustain these. Eket might be better but it lacks the population. There is no middle class in Uyo. The jobs there are not blue collar or workmen jobs. Sales attendant, marketers or companies that open branches there with their hub or HQ somewhere else. All that attracts them is that Aiwa Ibom is Oil rich.

In the latest data released by NBS, Akwa Ibom's IGR so far is quite low, just hitting 20billion in 6 months while states like Ogun without Oil is over 50 billion. It shows that there are very little tax paying industries there and even less people Paying their PAYE. The workforce is quite low.

Akwa Ibom should and can do better but having lived there for years, I fear this project is just for show and to make mouth like Akpabio and Udom like to do. There's no time for that anymore. Government must be deliberate and strategic. There's so much suffering in the land that we don't have time for uncommon showmanship transformation like the church built by Udom's Administration. That's foolishness. We want deliberate development and transformation.

I'm very sure it's not sex with your wife.

I expect a Hollywood movie about this soon... Mehn! These guys are cold

My dear sister in Christ,

Thank God for your honesty. Thank God you're now a disciple of Jesus. Of course you know there's a big difference in being "Church goer" (what we call 'Christian' nowadays) and being a disciple of Jesus. From your salvation story, I see that you understand what it means to be saved. Thank God for that. Don't be discouraged by the many posts of condemnation you see here, it's normal for people who don't know Christ to do this. Next time, receiving advice from Nairaland may not be the best option. If you're in a discipleship relationship, speak to your discipler about issues. Your discipler should be a mature believer actively following Jesus and preferably a couple.

About your issue, the first matter is that you didn't pray about it at first like you said. So tell him you people need to take time to pray separately to seek God's face. It will be difficult for him to accept because emotions are involved, but it's better to hear from God properly before you take this very important step. I hope you know as a disciple, divorce is not an option. So if you will live forever with him, three months time off to pray genuinely shouldn't hurt. During my time, it was more like 7 months after I had proposed. I'm getting married this Saturday after a long time. It wasn't easy, but it's worth it. I see God's mercy and faithfulness all round and I know it will translate into marriage itself.

Secondly, are you people attending any intending couples counseling class? Marriage is not about how you feel or about sex. It's about the purpose of God for you both. How well are you seeking God for this purpose? I can recommend a class for believers for you. It holds online if you're outside Lagos and onsite in Lagos. You need to know more about marriage from God's perspective. I also hope sex hasn't been involved in your relationship. That's a perfect ground for separation for now.

Lastly, even if a catholic can actually be a believer (because it's not the denomination you belong that defines your Christianity, it's following Jesus), I want you to know that you are right in the thoughts about Catholicism. The worship of 'Mary' is idolatry. Don't feel isolated or dejected by people abusing you and claiming 'one God we are worshipping'. We aren't worshipping one God. Not withstanding, God can strategically position his disciple in a catholic church or even some 'worse' churches for the purpose of impact and transformation. But anyone who doesn't believe in Jesus as Savior, Lord and God is condemned already. John 3:18. Therefore, if your fiancé is of this disposition, please don't be unequally yoked. You'll regret it for life.

Apart from these, what other red flags have you noticed?

God bless you sister and I hope you follow the leadings of the Holy Spirit.

Well, you did bad. You should have asked your wife for sex. There's nothing that says you can't have sex with a pregnant woman.

But right now, it's not possible for you to know you are HIV positive just after 1 week. HIV is not Corona Virus. You need at least 3 months to be able to have a positive test. You are still in what is called a window period. You may have an STI and that's what's making you feel that way. So, go and do a lab test.

Also, confess to your wife, not just to Nairaland. Your repentance is not genuine or complete until you have told her, whether you are positive or not. If you don't, you will do it again, even worse than this. You have opened an hedge in your family and the serpent will surely strike you. Adultery is not a joke. Please, repent truly and completely.

I understand what you're going through. It will take a while and work from you. But first, to not be embarrassed by those erections, wear briefs. The type that will hold your crouch well. So that when those erections come, it won't necessarily show. Secondly, your mind has probably been to exposed to lust and lustful thought or images. I don't know how but that's why you're getting this. The mind is like a computer, it's garbage in, garbage out (GIGO). What you feed it is what it gives back via your body. So work on what you put in your mind. If you're into Porn, pls stop. If you masturbate (as in technical virgin things�), you will only compound your problem. You have done well and the hardest thing by being open about your problem and bringing it out in the light. That's the first step to healing and recovery. Don't mind the people abusing you here, believe me they are worse but won't admit it. You've done well by admitting. When you've stopped filling your mind with negative stuff, start putting positive stuff in your mind. I recommend the bible or better still, good inspirational books.

Here's a trick I'll teach you. I'm sure you won't lust after your mum or your sister (if you have one). No matter how you feel it's bad for you, you won't lust after them or have an erection when you hug your mum. So, there's what we call image superimposition. When you're with any lady, imagine they were your blood sister... "Ew right". That's how it is. In retrospect, every young lady is supposed to be treated as your sister while the older lady should be treated as mum. The bible recommends that. You should read it sometime.

Finally, don't put too much pressure on yourself because you're still young. You will definitely outgrow it with time k. Just don't do anything stupid.