₦airaland Forum

Buy a very beautiful birthday card and write out your heart on it, then place the money in an envelope telling him you couldnt think of anything to get him. Trust me he will love it.

Dont buy him any recharge card o!!

WOW!!

This is getting interesting.

Just to get this straight, I am a former christian turned freelancer _{(meaning no religious affiliation)}.

Now I have had quite a few moslem friends and actually lived with one before.

These are my questions;

1. Its obvious that moslems do not believe in the death and cruxifiction of Jesus, hence my question; What does it take to be saved _{(or should I say a born again moslem)}?

2. Whats the deal with Jihad?? Killing all non-believers!! Isnt that harsh??

3. I once heard that the religion Islam actually originated from Abrahams first son. I have forgotten his name. the one he was never a father to.

4. Do they collect tithes and offering at your gatherings??

5. Whats the stance of Islam on faith healings and miracles, cos I dont see moslem having crusades like _{(Total experience and stuff)} like christians. .

6. This is just my opinion, but isnt Islam a sexist religion. I mean I personally feel it is very unfair to women. _{(Correct me if I am wrong)}.

7. Whats the deal with sharia?? Especially in the civilised world of today.

8. Does the Quran say anything bout the holy spirit?? or Trinity??


_{I have a ton of questions but I would take them a little at a time. Please note that I am not trying to become a muslim, but only trying to educate myself on the workings of your religion}

give him the money.

[size=28pt]* 10[/size]

By technical Knock out, I hereby declare coolkdat the winner.

^{***** hands coolkdat the championship belt ****** and 1000 dollars cash money ******}

I be nairaland official refferee for all fights o!!


*[size=28pt] 2[/size]

Where tufe go??

I go declare winner o!!

If I count to 10 and ehn no show, cooly don win be dat.

*[size=28pt]1[/size]

And the Golden Glode for best story teller is LADYAIJAY

**** Cheers & Applause ****

@ Topic

With Wifey material kinda girl,

We'll start the night with dinner at an exclusive restaurant _{(the kind where you need a reservation to get in).}  after which we'll go see a romantic movie _{(where I'll try the yawning technique to get my arms around her shoulders)}, after the movie its suya/popcorn and a six pack/40 ounce and we are heading to my place for some music and dessert.

For princess to see Benjay decoder think say na jeovy own. . . . . Hmm!!      

I wonder why?? is it size??  Is it shape??    Has she seen both before and couldnt differenciate            

All this una kissy kissy and lovey lovey wey una dey do for here na ehn be the answer to the post??

Na wah o!!

this joke need explanation

Everytime I stole, I had the living daylights flogged out of me.

I never said stealing was good o!! NO. All I am saying is that it is not unusual to hear of a 12 year old that steals. Big deal. Correct him, flog him, wateva! but its not like he impregnated a girl.

HOUSE BOY/GIRLS below the age of 18years are slaves period.

There is a law against this kind of slavery in the country, but in Nigeria anything goes. Aunty my foot. Some house girls are called aunty o!! Dont try to decieve us. And also most atimes, househelps are normally your kinsmen or relatives.

I think all househelps should form a union and start charging at least 20,000 naira a month for their services and this non sense will surely stop.

Gamine swear to me that you never stole nothing in your entire life.

[quote author=Gold*Finch link=topic=150365.msg2498962#msg2498962 date=1215908321]You people are lucky

and here I was afraid of stealing or risk hours of kneeling down and rasing my hands up after some painful beatings.

lucky children! You were allowed to steal when u were just a kid.

Btw, I bet you also lied about not stealing.[/quote]Lets be serious here, if I was allowed, then it is no longer stealing now is it?? A child steals simply because he has been told he cant have it. Imagine that village boy, now in the midst of plenty and yet still has nothing. Simple psychology.

My point is simple, a child is a child.
A 12 year old, is a child.
School is no excuse for child abuse.
This is africa, No this is Nigeria. Every houseboy goes to school. But how come you never went to the same kind of schools your houseslaves attended??
No matter how much we try to sugar coat it, he is still being enslaved.
As a 12 year old, I hated doing chores of any kind. All chores were done against my will.

The poster is obviously old enough, why dosent she do those chores herself and collect whatever it is that the boy is being paid.

There was this day while out for a stroll with my friends in Ghana, I saw this man beating the shit out of this lady.
He was flogging her with his belt while stomping her into the ground with his boots.

Out of pity and curiousity we stopped and asked the man what she had done to deserve such brutality.

He simply replied; She stole my 150,000 cedis (80 cedis = 1 naira).

We later found out that she was his wife.

LadyT:
Who is trying to defend him stealing here?

Oshi

I am o!!

When I was 12, my God I was a little crook.
I stole like a rat. _{Meat from the pot of stew, milk, milo, 5 naira for choco milo and goody goody kind of stealing}

Thats what 12 year olds do. And mind you I was no houseboy, it was my dads house, my dads meat, my dads milk. Now imagine a 12 year old boy in another mans house, where he has basically no rights to take nothing.

I have o!

During sex. _{smack that a,}  

But on a more serious note, I love my girlfriend too much to even shout at her let alone hit her.
If we have a misunderstanding, I simply walk out, wait for her to calm down, return and then we talk like civilised adults.

Violence of any sort is not an option for me. _{I'm too busy loving to fight}

Gamine:
You arent being Rational at all.

A 12 year old is a kid. There is nothing to be rational about here.

At the age of 12, I could barely clean up after myslef let alone clean up after others.

Heres a song from the sound of music - Goodbye

There's a sad sort of clanging from the clock in the hall
And the bells in the steeple too
And up in the nursery an absurd little bird
Is popping out to say "cuckoo"
[Marta, Gretl, Brigitta:]
Cuckoo, cuckoo

Regretfully they tell us Cuckoo, cuckoo
But firmly they compel us Cuckoo, cuckoo
To say goodbye . . .

Cuckoo!

. . . to you


So long, farewell, auf Wiedersehen, good night

I hate to go and leave this pretty sight


So long, farewell, auf Wiedersehen, adieu

Adieu, adieu, to yieu and yieu and yieu


So long, farewell, au revoir, auf wiedersehen

I'd like to stay and taste my first champagne


So long, farewell, auf Wiedersehen, goodbye

I leave and heave a sigh and say goodbye -- Goodbye!

I'm glad to go, I cannot tell a lie

I flit, I float, I fleetly flee, I fly

The sun has gone to bed and so must I


So long, farewell, auf Wiedersehen, goodbye
Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye

Gamine:
She said he runs errands and sweeps.

my 10yr old sister could do the same

i don't know why you people want to pop your arteries on this!!!

Errands you say!! Let me guess, washing dishes, sweeping the entire house, dusting, cleaning, taking the trash out, preparing meals, laundry and is still expected to read and at the same time be a kid.

Puleeze.

What is the standard of education they are offering?? public schools were there is basically little or no teaching done abi??

I believe shes older than the kid, why cant she do those chores at the same time go to school, get paid and still have time to spend chatting on Nairaland.

Abeg lets call a spade a spade and a 12 year old houseboy, a slave.

Gamine:
I just knew the pack would get here

They are sending the boy to school, can't u people read!

he is not a slave, haba!

A 12 year old child is in need of care and attention and is not in any position to be caring for anybody.

If he is not a slave?? then what do you call it??

davidylan:
the same folks own the private schools, i don't think they will take kindly to picketing their cash cows.

The whole idea is to get their attention and what better way to do it than to piss them off.

Excuse me bebe!!

O baby, wats up??

Excuse me but your face looks familiar, have we met??

I almost forgot.

12 years of age??

You should be in jail for child labour and abuse.

Thats 15 - 20 years in federal accomodation

I support picketting private schools.

Reason; I can bet my bottom dollar that non of the top civil servants, ministers, judiciary, legislator, governors or even the presidents child is in any publis school.
So the strike action does not bother them one bit. My opinion, shut down the entire education sector and cause a major stir. Thats sure to get their attention.

First of all you have a house boy in present day Nigeria?? - Thats slavery

He steals - How much do you pay him?? - Let me guess _{(Minimum wage)} 7000 naira a month

He lies - He who is without sin cast the first stone.

If he is so bad send him packing.

HOLY COW BELLS ! ! ! !   Mother of peak milk

       

Does African American names have any meaning??

Example

Sheniqua
Tamika
Shaquala
Shandra
Letoya
Tanya

Sisikill:
After the rules, come the application process.

APPLICATION FOR PERMISSION TO DATE MY DAUGHTER

NOTE: This application will be incomplete and rejected unless
accompanied by a complete financial statement, job history, lineage, and current medical report from your doctor.

NAME_____________________
DATE OF BIRTH_____________
HEIGHT_____ WEIGHT____________ IQ__________ GPA_______

SOCIAL SECURITY #________ DRIVERS LICENSE #_________

BOY SCOUT RANK AND BADGES_____________
HOME ADDRESS______
CITY/STATE_______ ZIP______

Do you have parents? ___Yes ___No
Is one male and the other female? ___Yes ___No

If No, explain:__________

Number of years they have been married ______________

If less than your age, explain __________________________

ACCESSORIES SECTION:

A. Do you own or have access to a van? __Yes __No

B. A truck with oversized tires? __Yes __No

C. A waterbed __Yes __No

D. A pickup with a mattress in the back? __Yes __No

E. A tattoo? __Yes __No

F. Do you have an earring, nose ring, pierced tongue, pierced cheek or a belly button ring? ___Yes ___No

(IF YOU ANSWERED "YES" TO ANY OF THE ABOVE, DISCONTINUE APPLICATION AND LEAVE PREMISES IMMEDIATELY. I SUGGEST RUNNING.)

ESSAY SECTION:

In 50 words or less, what does "LATE" mean to you?
___________________________

In 50 words or less, what does "DON'T TOUCH MY DAUGHTER" mean to you? ___________________________
In 50 words or less, what does "ABSTINENCE" mean to you?_______________________

REFERENCES SECTION:

Church you attend__________

How often you attend _____
When would be the best time to interview your:

father? _____________

mother? _____________

pastor? _____________


SHORT-ANSWER SECTION:

Answer by filling in the blank. Please answer freely, all answers are confidential.

A: If I were shot, the last place I would want shot would be: ______________
B: If I were beaten, the last bone I would want broken is my:_____________________
C: A woman's place is in the:
___________________________
D: The one thing I hope this application does not ask me about is:_____________

E. What do you want to do IF you grow up? ___________


F. When I meet a girl, the thing I always notice about her first is:_____________

G. What is the current going rate of a hotel room? _______

I SWEAR THAT ALL INFORMATION SUPPLIED ABOVE IS TRUE AND CORRECT TO THE BEST OF MY KNOWLEDGE UNDER PENALTY OF DEATH, DISMEMBERMENT, NATIVE AMERICAN ANT TORTURE, CRUCIFIXION, ELECTROCUTION, CHINESE WATER TORTURE, RED HOT POKERS, AND HILLARY CLINTON KISS TORTURE.
__________________________
Applicant's Signature (that means sign your name, slowpoke!)

Mother's Signature________
Father's Signature________

Pastor/Priest/Rabbi State Representative/Congressman___________
Thank you for your interest, and it had better be genuine and non-sexual. Please allow four to six years for processing.

You will be contacted in writing if you are approved. Please do not try to call or write (since you probably can't, and it would cause you injury). If your application is rejected, you will be notified by two gentleman wearing white ties carrying violin cases. (you might watch your back)

Also submit

1. Your International passport

2. A fullset of fingerprints with dental records

3. Copy of your drivers license

4. Two current passport photograph

5. A set of photographs showing your front, side and plan view

6. A detailed body statistic including, height, hair colour, eye colour

7. A copy of a police character report signed 3 hours before the time of submission

8. Full record of your family tree

9. Names and addresses of friends, family relatives and acquintances both here and abroad.

10. A sample of your hair, blood and any other body fluid.