₦airaland Forum

When you as a grown ass man, with a job, a house and a car, start chasing an undergraduate girl in her late teens or early twenties, in the name of marriage, biko what else do you want her to bring to the table aside from her good character and support towards your goal?

So, you want a girl that you are older than by almost a decade to bring a car, a house and a well paid job to the table at that age?

Did you as a man, have a car, a house and a well paid job in your late teens, early twenties or even mid to late twenties?

You guys would look down on ladies in your age range that can pull same financial weight as and be running after very young girls, and still have the guts to come online to ask what they can bring to the table.

Brother, you didn't see that aunty in your neighbourhood that is not only bringing things to the table, but is the table herself?

See how they are all chorusing women have nothing to offer other than sex.

But withhold sex from them for 1 night, and you see them opening threads upandan; my wife denies me "sex".

When you guys make sex feel as if it is your lifeblood, why would women be inclined to offer you anything more when they've given you what you consider most precious?

Nonsense and ingredients.

If this thread is about personal allowance for wify after the husband has provided for the major part of the household expenses, then I would say it is not a regular thing in many households in this Naija.

Husbands usually just get their wives nice gifts once in a while or support their businesses financially once in a while.

Regular (monthly) cash allowances for working wives is a rarity presently o. Husbands are not finding providing the major part of the expenses for their families easy, you now want to add a flimsy thing as wify's personal allowance to it? Mbanu, kolework.

Abeg the working sisters that receive personal allowances regularly should indicate by commenting so that others can know if they are to review the present MOUs they signed with their significant others.

Tenkiu.

I am still trying to understand the meaning of upkeep as it relates to this thread.

Is it a personal allowance given to the wife by the husband to use for herself however she pleases, or for household expenses especially food and provisions?

Seriously, ICAN needs to look into that dues payment area, so that once dues are paid, the student's financial status is updated within 24 hours max.

You can't pay dues and be fretting for another 1 month before your financial status is updated nah, haba.

OP, call the finance helpdesk again, and calmly tell whoever picks to help you check your record to confirm that the dues payment you made has been updated. Have your student registration number on hand, so you can easily call it out for him/her during the call.

Sometimes, it is updated immediately on their system, but before they update your student page, it takes another long time.

OP,

As soon as you can, please get this Indian film and watch it: Taare Zameen Par (Like stars on earth). Pls get the one that is properly subtitled.

Watching this movie will give you a fresh perspective on this issue, help you understand your son better and develop better ways of helping him excel academically and socially.

I wish you guys the best.

Op, you need to sit your wife down and have this conversation with her, presenting the figures as they are.
The proposed salary for the job is too small compared to the extra financial cost of getting a house help who would be filling in for her while she is at work.
The job is too far from her vicinity biko. 2hrs to work and 2½ hrs from work.
My advise is for her to get a job with same salary scale of 50k and above, that is closer to home. That way she can get the kids ready for school, drop them off on her way to work and pick them up when she closes from work at 5pm. Many schools now stay up to 6-7pm because of working moms, you guys will only have to pay a little extra lesson fees.
Op, I hope you are including her in your own finances and financial plans to an extent. Set up a joint account that she an have access to should she be in dire need of fund.
If Madam feels Oga is hoarding his money and only dropping housekeeping money that is not even enough, she will even be ready to do a 30k job provided it will give her some money at the end of the month, anyhow oga wishes to pay for house help is oga's problem.

olayincar:
Name one country in Africa better than Algeria

Algeria received some cool money from CAF for their 2019 AFCON triumph

Hello Everyone,

I am having a challenge checking my exam and financial status on the ICAN site.

I registered as requested, and I am able to log in; but when I want to proceed to check exam and financial status, I keep getting error messages.

Is anyone else experiencing this? Or is there something else I ought to do?

Pls guys advise me
Thanks.

Hello my people,

I invested in FBN money market fund sometime ago (about 3 months ago), The customer ID was sent to me then and recently the login password.

Pls, how do I log in to check my investment.

Thank you.

Hello people,

I downloaded the Stanbic app from play store and created an account; followed instructions on d app and deposited #5,000. I got a text from them that an account has been created for me and the log in details would be sent within 48 hrs.
It has been a week plus now, no log in details sent. I've sent mails to mutualfunds@
stanbicibtc.com and assetmanagement@stanbicibtc.com, yet no reasonable response.
What do I do? This is annoyingly frustrating.

Good morning investors

I am new to this mutual fund investments but would very much like to invest.
I am interested in FBN and Stanbic MMF for now.
Pls, how do I register/ invest?
Do I walk into any first bank or stanbic bank branch; would I be attended to there?
Thank you as you respond.

OP,
Since you said your brother fetches water in the house and helps out with some other chores, he is doing enough. Many men are not comfortable in their wife's kitchen not to talk of the kitchen that belongs to a SIL.

I bet your brother isn't comfortable standing in that kitchen not to talk of doing dishes. Let madam wash the plates by herself, wetin sef.

IMO, your brother should just try to ensure that there is always water in the house for everyone to use, let him just take that as what he is offering as thanks for the accommodation. It's only a matter of time before he leaves, but while he is there let him make his stay pleasant for both himself and his host and hostess.

See how the Eniola guy just dey announce money to takle bamboozle the judge sha....

I give her 200k monthly..
Paid for ante-natal at reddington..
Took them to Dubai...
Etc...

Well, you try sha. It shows you are concerned about your daughter's welfare. IMHO, the girl's mother is concerned about her welfare too.

For the guy to want to take full custody of the child, it means he intends to use his family name and wealth to influence the judgement. Telling the court that your daughter is being brought up in an unhygeinic environment is funny; the mother is a pharmacist for God's sake. So, it's only banana island houses that are hygeinic?

IMO, let the mother have custody while the father is granted visiting rights. Cos, I do not see how a busy young man, can take care of a toddler by himself except he plans to dump her with his mum or another of his girlfriends.

#saynotobabymamaandpapa#

Woman and man palaver...... E no dey tire una?


Simple advise una no wan follow. Woman submit, Man love. Shikena.

Why all the bruhahaha? Make una dey fear God o.

Dear Parents...

Children learn a lot by watching you. If you want to have a godly child(ren), you must first be godly. Most of the values your chlidren will have will come from you. A simple example is the kind of music they listen to. I have found out that even as an independent adult, I still have a great collection of many of the music I grew up listening to my parents play. Imagine if they had been listening to junk.....

If you want disciplined and responsible children that you can be proud of when they grow up, then you have to start from being a disciplined and responsible parent. What you sow, is ultimately what you will reap.

#Godblessourfamilies#

Husbands..... Pray for your wife to love and respect you. You'll live longer and happier.

Women..... Pray for your husband to love and respect you. You'll live longer and happier.

That is the whole essence of marriage.

Submission is a blanket word. So many writers scream it at women without defining it. Until I meet a writer that defines it with clear examples, i reserve my comment.

At least the holy book defines the word love which is expeceted of a man in marriage. One definition is "love is not arrogant, it is not deceitful, it does not seek its own way"

I dare you as a man, to live up to the definition of love as stated in the holy book, keeping your own part of the vow and let see if your wife won't bow in reverence to you; "submission" would just be the tip of the iceberg.

chidanzy:
Glo bis is the best for me
It gives whooping 3gb for 30days for jus 1000 Naira
Just hack ur imei to a blackberry imei then ur good to go

pls, how can one change their Imei to a blackberry Imei? I'm using infinix hot2

OP, that was a wonderful piece you posted up there.

This silent pride we all have has been the cause of many a broken relationship.

Adiahabasi:
Morning mums, my 7 months+ baby is teething,one out already,2nd almost...thing is she's had an increased temp for 3days in a row...been giving her pcm 8 hourly..temp reduces for abt 2-3 hrs then high again,then cold compress in btw..called a doc friend he advised i treat for malaria using crushed coartem tablet ..anyone done this before? Still her usual active self,appetite mildly reduced.Pls what do u think?(N.B;out of base for now)

Take your baby to the hospital. It's likely malaria. Or you can also go by your doc friend advice and give the coartem tabs for babies. There's one for 3mths and above. The tabs worked for my DS when he was 6mths and had malaria.

Sabi mums, I dey greet o. Pls o, I want to take coartem tabs 80/480. My baby is 7mths. Hope it is okay. Malaria is showing me pepper.

Selfishness is the number 1 thing that destroys a marriage.

Wanting to have your way all the time is enough to destroy any marriage.

The deal is: And the two shall become one....

Respect, love and appreciate your spouse..... They are the best thing that ever happened to you...

The success of your marriage is in your hands.... Do not let society and it's expectations spoil it.

sheweezy:
Good morning mommies, abeg my baby is 5 months today, abeg experienced mothers do babies "over" roll at this stage. Bed is not enough for him to roll neither is
My big parlour big enough for him. Once I put him down Luke this, within 5 seconds he has rolled from one angle to another. Even when he is sleeping, he keeps rolling sometimes putting his leg on my head or his dad's head. Turns 360 degrees. Abeg na so e dey be? And he is not crawling yet fa.

the rolling is normal. just make sure he doesn't fall off the bed. Put pillows at d edge of d bed so he doesn't roll and fall down. Also put a pillow btw him and d wall so he don't hit his head against it.

Welldone mama.

OP, you think childbirth is easy abi? If you see a thread where it is said that a married woman has refused to have children because she doesn't want to ruin her figure; you'd be the first to crucify her.

You sounded so angry in your post. Childbirth or not, as a person gets older you put on a little weight. Can you tell me you'd still be this size after 10 years? How then do you expect a woman after say 8 years and three children to be the same size she was when you married her?

Yeye dey smell. Better appreciate the woman you have and encourage her kindly to keep fit and remove your eyes from celebrities and their fake life.

OP, don't beat urself up cos the interviewer didn't appear entirely satisfied with your answer on that particular question. IMO, you answered the question well. Of course, interviewers always present a poker face to their interviewees, just to keep you in suspense. An interview that ends with smiles doesn't necessarily mean success; those smiles could be followed by a regret mail.

You did your best. Keep your fingers crossed and hope for the best.

Goodluck.

lamdec:
Hello.mamas, I know a lot of questions are yet to be answered but I will appreciate if this is answered. My baby is 15 days now and his placenta cord hasn't come off, my mum is kinda worried that it is taking too long. The doctors advice that I only clean it with cotton wool and methylated spirit but my mum is of the opinion that we should use heat compress on it. The stump looks fine, no smells, no discharge and it's shrinking but my mum thinks it's just taking too long. What else can I do, she is getting me to panic and I don't know if I should allow her use heat on his navel.

It will fall off soon, dear. No need to panic. Continue cleaning from time to time with the spirit and cotton wool.

OP, i feel your pain, but I think you knew right from the start that you married a lazy man when it came to domestic chores. Don't think your case is unique, some men are like that especially when the wife is a full time housewife. I would encourage you to stop letting your world revolve around house chores; don't try to be a perfectionist. Do the ones you can, little by little, one chore at a time. Try to schedule some rest periods in- between chores.
Also, try and talk to ur husband about getting a washing machine; let him know that the chores are becoming too much for you as your family is growing.
As for the fetching of water, i believe there must be some water vendors in your area, patronize them from time to time.
Above all, take time to look after yourself and your baby, have some relaxing and play time. Take your mind off those house chores. If your husbnd won't help you out sometimes, let him kiss the idea of a perfectly tended home bye bye.

Hello mamas, hope u and your LOs are all doing great. May God continue to strengthen you. Pls o, my working mothers, for a mother that goes to work from 7am to 6pm, what can I do abt my breastmilk? Should I buy breast pump and express in a bottle while at work to relieve the engorgement? Will it be okay for my baby when I get home?

Pls, any advice on what to do would be welcome. My baby will be three months old soon.

Hello mamas, hope you all and your LOs are fine. I just want to share this info, maybe it can help someone sometime. I just discovered that giving honey to infants below one year is not good; that it might cause a disease called botulism (Google it pls). The honey can still pass thru breastmilk and cause same illness

I just thought I should share it here.

FexCathy:
Pls mamas, I wud like to ask a question. My son has this grunting noise dat accompanies his breathing esp @ nyt. The noise sounds like as if mucus is blocking his chest. @ 1st I tot it was cattarh and av used a lot of tings but its dere. A nurse told me that its becos dey didn't suck d mucus out after I delivered him & that with time he wud outgrow it. Pls is dis true cos it breaks my heart to hear d grunting noise & its more audible @ nyt.

My baby made the same grunting noise after birth and up to 3 weeks. Then he had catarrh and it became worse. Breathing even became difficult for him. I complained to a doctor and he said to leave him dat he'd outgrow it. But it was getting worse cos he wouldn't sleep at night cos his nose was blocked as well. So, I bought ampiclox drop and gave to him. It really helped to clear his respiratory tract and he has been breathing better since then.

Maybe you should try it.

RIP sly